Love Is No Fairytale
by cjfreeman
Summary: Sequel to Unlikeliest of Lovers. Misto and Tugger enjoy their new lives as mates but their love is severely tested after an accident occurs one fateful night.
1. Do You Love Me?

**Here it is: A sequel to Unlikeliest Of Lovers! Hope it's okay. By the way, you could probably read this without reading the prequel but it might make more sense to do that.**

**Now, let me apologise. I always, always re-read my stories after I write them to make sure there aren't any spelling or grammatical errors and most of the time I can pick up on the problems. However, I've read through Unlikeliest Of Lovers and I realise at that time I was not so good at it. Sorry about the spelling errors, I'm quite ashamed to be honest. Please don't throw things at me!**

**Anyway, this one picks up a while after where the last one ended. I could explain but it's all in the text. Have fun!**

**Love Is No Fairytale**

**Chapter 1**

**Do You Love Me?**

The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious cat. It never seemed that any one thing – regardless of what it was or even who – could satisfy him and he constantly went through life wanting something better. He had been that way ever since he was a kitten and had caused his parents more trouble than any cat should have to deal with. As he grew and discovered his own body he realised – partly from observation of himself and partly by observing others' reactions to him – that he was quite the looker. With sleek black fur accented by sexy sections of leopard print and a huge, wild mane it was easy to see why he could have any cat he thrust his hips towards. This, as a matter of fact, had always been the case ever since he had been old enough to see other cats as objects and he continually went through streams of both queens and toms as his libido grew larger and larger every day. It seemed at one time, perhaps, that absolutely nothing could stop him and he would carry on through life having fruitless, solely sexual relationships and never get close to any other cat. In some ways he used to like that idea and revelled in his ability to pick up and dump whichever cat he saw fit in the blink of an eye.

This was all until one day when out of the blue he noticed a cat he had known for a large part of his life and this time said cat had a certain glimmer about him. At first the new feelings he had experienced were those which were usually found swirling in his loins but somewhere along the line they had become deep-rooted testaments of love. He had been completely knocked head over heels when he realised that for the first time in his life he was actually in love with another cat and the strangest thing was that he had never felt better. To have another in his life to care for and be cared for in return was indescribable and nothing like he had ever felt before. Pretty soon he had known he never wanted to feel any different and had proudly taken the cat as his mate. Despite a horrible twist of events and a few quite rocky situations Tugger knew he had chosen right and up until now woke up everyday with a tingling feeling inside him that let him know he had been completed. Maybe the tingling feeling was because his mate was magical but he didn't care either way. Sure, that magic was amazing and he constantly marvelled at his wonderful mate's abilities but it was his sweet and caring nature that was the real draw. Tugger knew he had truly found happiness in the Magical Mister Mistoffelees and when he looked into his eyes he knew without a doubt that the feeling was mutual.

An early spring evening's dying light filtered through the twisted and haphazard piles of junk that made up their junkyard home and a certain eeriness hung in the air as the endless mounds of rubbish were cast into a deep orange glow from the sunset. As the night became closer and the stars began to come out the Rum Tum Tugger remained sleeping soundly in his den with the one he adored in his arms. Mistoffelees lay curled up in his embrace and despite being asleep he still produced a gentle purr of complete comfort and contentment. The black and white young tom was still rather young when he had mated to Tugger and that wasn't all that long ago in retrospect. Mistoffelees it seemed would never loose the traits that made others see him as quite kittenish but he really didn't mind. While he was incredibly smart he liked being thought of as naïve and a little bit innocent as it really helped him keep up his mysterious façade. At least, to others. He no longer wished to be vague towards Tugger since he wanted nothing more than to get closer to his tom. When he found he was in love he didn't quite understand but knew he didn't want to fight it. It felt so natural and so perfect that he always did his best to explore it further each day and this is why he didn't keep secrets from the Maine Coon. Not anymore. Mistoffelees loved his Tugger and that was more important than wearing a mask day in day out. With a gentle flickering of his eyes he was soon awake and he took in the first sights of that evening. There in front of him was Tugger and he smiled when he saw the flirtatious beast breathing heavily in his sleep. It felt great to wake up every evening and see his tom still sleeping so peacefully and it made him giggle internally to behold the sight. Tugger was an incredibly lazy sleeper and he often lay with his jaw slacked open and his body sprawled out wherever he deemed the most inconvenient others. He of course made provisions to hold Misto tightly but didn't care much for anything else. It was in his nature to be irritating and it held true even in his sleep. Misto simply enjoyed the sight and waited silently for his tom to wake up – whenever that may be.

It wasn't too long before the light outside had become incredibly dim and Misto heard the movements of the other Jellicles in the junkyard outside the den he shared with Tugger. Still he waited but Tugger didn't seem to show any signs of stirring. He waited and waited and it wasn't long before half an hour had gone by with him still lying there in Tugger's grasp. Usually he was a patient tom but he was beginning to feel restless and wanted to get up. Feeling mischievous he reached his paw out into the air and began to rub his thumb and index finger together feeling a warm tingle build up there as he did so. When he felt ready he brought his paw over towards his mate and quickly flicked those two fingers apart from each other. The result was a squeaky pop that was not too loud but enough to startle Tugger and make him flail wildly for a few seconds as he was jolted from his slumber. Misto watched as his mate made his strange display and couldn't help but laugh when the tom was left with a look of confusion and fussiness as he settled back down. When he noticed Misto giggling as he looked at him he sat up pouting and kicked his legs off of the bed to face away from him. Straight away he went to work preening his mane and in the usual fashion when he was woken up quickly began to whine,

"I don't like it when you do that. It's mean"

His reaction just made Misto giggle more and the tuxedo-patterned tom decided to tease him,

"Oh…the big, strong Rum Tum Tugger doesn't like it when I bully him. Poor little pussycat"

"Shut up!" said the bigger tom putting more emphasis on the 'up' of the phrase. "You know I don't like it when you wake me up like that"

"I like it"

"Well don't. It's not fair"

"I never said I was fair"

"Why are you being so mean this evening?" asked Tugger turning around and looking at the smaller tom with the same pout. Misto pushed himself to his knees and scooted over to Tugger getting in close to kiss him before the bigger tom could do anything about it. After a few seconds he knew he couldn't resist the smaller tom and played him at his own game. Tugger was an excellent kisser and Misto soon became putty in his paw as he lay him back down and climbed on top of him to kiss him harder. The smaller tom melted in Tugger's embrace and held on tightly as his head started to swim with passion. After a few moments Tugger pulled gently back and looked down at Misto with a wry smile and spoke softly as he began to stroke the fur on his head,

"You know your meanness is no match for how gorgeous  
I am, don't you?"

Misto just smiled back, "How is it that you love yourself so much?"

"When you look this good you can't help but love yourself"

"Yeah, yeah…" responded Misto playfully, "Well, you know there's a cat that loves you more than you do, don't you?"

"More than one, I can barely keep them away sometimes"

"You know who I mean"

The corner of Tugger's mouth turned up and he moved closer to be eye to eye with Misto, "I don't think I do"

Misto happily went along with it and attempted to appear just as sexy as Tugger, "You know the one. The tuxedo tom that loves you more than anyone else"

"Oh yeah? What's he like?"

"Oh he's quite something, you're very lucky to have him"

"I reckon I could have had him at the drop of a hat if I had wanted to"

"Hey!" yelped Misto forgetting his attempt at a sensual guise, "I wasn't that easy!"

Tugger grinned evilly, "You sure? It seemed to me that I was all you could think about."

"You know that's not true!"

"Come on, Misty…"

"Don't call me Misty"

"Really? I thought you liked being called Misty, or Mistykins" said Tugger finding it hard not to crack up over how flustered Misto was getting since he was no longer the one doing the teasing.

"No!" squeaked Misto

"Is there something else you'd like me to call you?"

"Misto is fine"

"Not even Missy?"

"Especially not Missy!"

"How about something a little more…dark" said Tugger in a low growl close to the tuxedo's ear. Misto felt a small shiver inside him, even he was victim to Tugger's charms when he laid it on thickly.

"You are an absolute nightmare" said the small tom with a tiny tremble in his voice.

"Tell me you don't love it" responded Tugger menacingly as he started nipping and placing small kisses on the tom's neck. Slowly Misto was loosing his ability to remain in control of the urges that were building inside him and he began to grip the bigger tom that was still on top of him more tightly. He would be embarrassed to admit it but he loved being there feeling the bigger tom run his paws over his body making him shiver and also feeling his weight press him down into the bed. Tugger radiated sex and from time to time Misto wondered how he had ever resisted his appeal. He was glad they loved each other so much or else he knew he would feel like a complete whore for allowing himself to succumb to Tugger's temptations. When he thought about their love though all his worries went away; he had never known such a wonderful feeling and he never wanted to be apart from the one that allowed him to feel it. He adored his tom completely.

Misto took a moment to centre his mind and then his expression softened,

"Seriously, Tug. You know I love you, right?"

Tugger's smile became warmer upon hearing this and he placed a soft kiss on the tux's lips before responding,

"You should know I do. Do you love me?"

"Absolutely"

* * *

The night was soon upon the junkyard and the many Jellicles that inhabited were quick to emerge from their places of rest. Munkustrap – a silver tabby and protector of them all – sat with his mate Demeter – a black and gold queen – on top of a large discarded tyre that sat to the edge of the large clearing that made up the centre of the junkyard. Together they watched the night's events unfold and it wasn't long before the queen was drawn away to chat by her friend Bombalurina. Bomba was a red queen with a fiery personality and it was widely known that she and Tugger had had something that was not quite a relationship before he had mated to Misto. She had been rife with jealousy when the Maine Coon started to pay the small tom more attention than her and she had very nearly succeeded in driving Misto away so she could steal Tugger back. In time, however, she had come to realise just how wrong she had been to do so and had been incredibly upset with herself for doing the things she had done to tarnish the young tom's reputation. She had never really had a quam with Misto but she knew that her temper could sometimes get away from her. Since she had come to accept Tugger and Misto as mates she had done her best to strengthen her relationship with both of them and surprisingly it had been Tugger that it was more difficult to do as such with. Their relationship, in hindsight, had been almost completely sexual and it felt strange to interact with each other in ways that didn't involve rolling around in her den. There had been a few times when they had needed to abandon their attempts at reconciliation due to sheer embarrassment and even shame but recently they had managed to make some ground. She was glad to hear Tugger had actually managed to fall in love and though at first she had been put out that it wasn't her he had fallen for she was nonetheless happy that he was happy. What's more she was somewhat relieved since she could now step back and see just what she must have looked like to be completely hung up on him. He had been completely outrageous with her and to remember just how she had accepted it made her feel undignified. She knew she was a good, upstanding queen on the inside and she really hoped she could remain that way from now on; if only it weren't for her love of the 'bad boy' attitude.

As she sat with Demeter they nattered about the usual things and eventually got onto the topic of mates. It was true that Bomba was feeling the need to find someone creep up on her again and since this was the first time since Tugger wasn't available anymore she felt somewhat at a loss. Demeter was the only one that really understood her as they were the absolute best of friends and she felt the least she could do was lend a sympathetic ear. She tried to tell Bomba she would find someone but the red queen was finding it hard to accept that it wouldn't take long for that to happen.

As they carried on they noticed Misto jump out of his and Tugger's den with a big smile plastered across his face.

"Good evening, everyone!" he called out gleefully as he jumped down from the junk and scampered around.

"He certainly looks happy" said Bomba apathetically, "One guess as to why"

"No need to guess" replied Deme as she gestured towards where the tux had just emerged. Tugger was climbing out with a sly smile and he stood looking out across the junkyard while he adjusted his belt. Within seconds he was surrounded by his fan club and was being rubbed against fervently. He enjoyed their obsessive affection and enjoyed more wondering whether or not it made Misto uncomfortable or not. It felt even better though whenever Misto came by and he could push the kittens aside to be with him. It felt nicer in every way that he thought about it and was glad that he could tap into this new level of pleasure.

Right now though, he enjoyed his fan club. He gyrated his hips for them a little and horsed around to get them to shriek and smirked when he noticed his brother's disapproving glare come from across the clearing. He may have been mated but he wasn't about to let that get in the way of breaking the rules – at least with everything but Misto. To be made to feel like a piece of meat was more of a compliment to him and he revelled in the younger cats' hungry gazes.

"Tugger!" yelled Etcetera, "Flex for me!"

"No! Flex for me!" cut in Electra

"Flex for me" came a silky yet still juvenile voice from the side. Tugger turned to see Misto seeming to have appeared from nowhere and watching him with knowing eyes and a cheeky smile. Without hesitation the bigger tom stepped towards him and fluffed his mane showing off just how attractive he perceived himself to be. Misto decided to let him have this one and walk forward to place his paws on the bigger tom's chest. Much to the dismay of the surrounding kittens they kissed quickly and placed arms around each other's backs so they could walk together.

"Where are you going?" asked Etcetera with a scowl. She was not at all happy that her future mate – in her mind - was leaving them to go off with his current mate.

"Just for a wander" said Tugger without looking at her, "Come on, babe"

Misto gave the kitten a sorry smile as they walked away and he really hoped she didn't hate him, after all he hadn't done anything but mated Tugger. Then again, maybe in Etcetera's eyes that was an unforgiveable crime.

As they walked they once again enjoyed the silence that was afforded to them by being alone on one of the junkyard's many trails. They liked walking with each other at night and Tugger always liked to watch Misto become entranced by the beauty he saw in everything. The tux was very insightful and there were many times when Tugger had attempted to understand the way he thought about things. Usually finding himself even more confused than when he had started he was happy enough just to watch his tom marvel at nature. On this night Misto walked along with an airy smile on his face and Tugger became curious as to the look.

"What's got you so happy?" he asked

"Nothing. Just happy is all"

"There's got to be something"

"I dunno. I was just thinking about where we go from here"

"What do you mean?"

"Well, we're mated now and I was thinking about what we might do next"

"In our relationship?"

"Uh huh. I was just smiling at the thought of our future"

Tugger chuckled lightly, that sounded a bit silly to him.

"The thought of our future. Well, personally I wasn't thinking much past tomorrow morning"

Misto stopped and caught Tugger before he could carry on. He spun him around playfully and draped his arms around his neck.

"Don't you ever think about the future at all?"

"Sometimes but I prefer to live in the moment. You know that."

"Mmm" hummed Misto thoughtfully as he looked away for a moment. "But you and I, you do think we have a future, right?"

"Of course I do. Unless you have other plans?" the bigger tom said with a smirk

"No. I suppose we're just different that way. I like to think about the future and what we'll get up to"

"Well, what did you have in mind?" asked Tugger as he turned around and started walking again. Misto quickly followed.

"Well, just the normal sorts of things mates do. Nothing like Jenny and Skimble though – that would probably be strange."

"Damn right"

"Maybe like Munk and Demeter, they seem really happy"

Tugger chuffed, "I don't think I really want to be like that goody-two-shoes brother of mine. Imagine how straightforward and ordered the sex must be"

Misto snorted and then tried to contain his giggles.

"You shouldn't say that about your brother, I'm sure he's perfectly good at-"

"Please! Let's not talk about Munkustrap having sex"

"You brought it up"

"Nonetheless, I don't think I really want to think about that"

"Well, okay. So maybe we won't be like them."

Tugger thought for a second and then decided to ask, "Are you getting at anything in particular?"

Misto was quiet and then just spoke apathetically, "Well, not really. I was just wondering if we'd ever do what other mates do…kittens for example…"

Tugger stopped dead with his eyes as wide as saucers. Misto carried on a few paces before realising has mate had halted and turned back to a very strange sight. Tugger's head was cocked to one side and he was staring at the tux with a look of complete stupefaction. There was silence between them for a good long while before Misto attempted to get through to him.

"Tugger? Are you alright?"

The maned tom continued to stare for another long moment and then said with a strained, scratchy voice, "What did you say?"

"I asked if you were alright"

"Before that"

"About what other mates do?"

"Kittens."

"Oh…was that bad?"

"Bah!" was all Tugger could mange as he held out his paws in front of him and seemed to scream 'Why?' with his eyes. Misto just looked down and laid his ears flat against his head.

"Sorry, Tug. I didn't mean to upset you"

Tugger didn't pick up on Misto's feeling stupid and carried on in his dazed state,

"Have you actually been thinking about kittens? Are you crazy? I mean, you and I having kittens? That's the craziest thing I've ever heard. You're barely out of kittenhood yourself and suddenly you want kittens? You're mad!"

Misto scuffed his paws and shifted uncomfortably as he stood before his flustered mate.

"I'm sorry. It was just a thought. I wondered whether or not you'd thought about it all but I didn't mean to take it any further than that. Just forget I said anything"

"It's gonna take me a while to forget about that. Everlasting, Misto. Kittens?"

The tux just looked down even further and didn't say anything. Tugger started to see he was making his mate feel about an inch tall and felt like an idiot for reacting like he did. It wasn't Misto's fault that he was so against the idea of starting a family and it wasn't fair to explode at him. With a deep sigh and a roll of his eyes he stepped forward and brought the smaller tom into his embrace. The two stood there for a few moments before Tugger found enough strength to swallow his pride,

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to get so…you know"

Misto loosened up a little and snuggled into his mate's mane,

"No, I'm sorry. I should have known"

"How could you have known I had all that bottled up in me?"

"It's alright. I won't mention it again"

"Not for a while at least. I just don't think I'm ready to raise kittens, let alone with you"

Misto stood in his lover's arms for a few moments more as Tugger's words sunk in. He then leant back with a puzzled expression and narrowed his eyebrows as he spoke,

"Let alone with me?"

Tugger was caught off guard and blabbered for a second or two before he managed words,

"I…uh…not with…I mean I didn't mean to say…well, I did but…Look, what I meant was it's just that you would…um…probably be really good at it and I know I'd just be terrible so I wouldn't want kittens to push us apart"

Misto looked up at him and wondered if that was really the truth but then tried to relax when he remembered Tugger wasn't really one to think before he spoke. He still wondered if maybe there was more to the statement but in his heart he knew Tugger was just being Tugger.

"Okay. Maybe we can talk about it in a few years"

"Alright then" said Tugger trying his best to look neutral but still feeling uneasy at the prospect of becoming a father. "Anyway, there was something else I wanted to talk to you about"

"Oh?"

"I was thinking it would be nice to get out of here for a night. You know I love my fan club but they can get a little suffocating from time to time. I was thinking that maybe you and I and some of the others could go out on the town for a night, you know, just for fun."

"Really?" asked Misto curiously. He had never really been out on the town except for when Tugger had taken him on dates; he loved those so surely going out with friends would be good as well, wouldn't it? "Alright, that sounds really nice. Where were you thinking of going?"

"I was thinking somewhere awesome. Maybe Soho or somewhere like that"

"Soho?" asked Misto. He had no idea where that was.

"You'll like it, just wait and see. You can meet some of my other friends"

"Oh" said Misto pausing. He had heard Tugger talk about his 'other friends' before and he had always made them sound quite shady or at least incredibly rambunctious. Not that it was much of a problem to him but still it made him feel a little nervous to think that he actually might meet some of the cats Tugger had told him about. Another thought that instantly crept into his mind was that of how many of these 'other friends' his mate had spent some 'quality time' with. What if they tried it on despite Tugger being mated now, would he – a little black and white tom not too long out of kittenhood – be able to stop them?

Tugger could see his mate's mind working and knew he had to stop him before it ran away with crazy ideas.

"You'll have a great time, don't worry about a thing. You know, it's not too late; how about we grab a couple of the others right now and see what we can find?"

Misto was hesitant but he didn't want to disappoint his mate. With a large gulp he put on a smile and with a sparkle in his eyes he happily said,

"Okay, let's go"

**How 'bout that then, huh? Kind of a slow start but I wanted to try and set the scene. Hopefully if you're reading this without having already read Unlikeliest of Lovers then it makes some sense to you.**

**The next chapter I hope won't take too long to write but no promises. Usually when I've got a story going the words come quite easily so I guess we'll just wait and see.**

**I'd love to hear what you think as I get this story going. Of course, if it sucks then tell me and I can try and make it better. **


	2. Tugger's Friends

**Chapter 2 and everything's still fine. I still find it strange that I'm best at writing late at night though. Surely that's the worst time to be writing if you want to use good grammar.**

**CrazyIndigoChild: You're right, maybe I made him seem a bit too young. I didn't intend for it to look like there's too much going on in his life but I can see why it might look that way. I think maybe because he's still a bit kittenish despite now being a tom he's trying to act like he thinks a grown-up ought to and is letting his mind run away with romantic thoughts. I guess he's acting like anyone does when they fall in love for the first time and gets way ahead of where they ought to be. I'm not sure so I guess that one's open to interpretation but moreover I should have made it more obvious in the text. Sorry 'bout that. Don't worry though, Misto is certainly not a kitten anymore so there's nothing dodgy going on that might make Tugger a paedophile. Thanks for picking up on what seems like an abundance of sex as well. I think I'll need to make it seem otherwise in this chapter because Misto is certainly not a slut in my mind! Lol.**

**Misto grows nervous as Tugger takes he and some of the others out.**

**WARNING: Bad language**

**Love Is No Fairytale**

**Chapter 2**

**Tugger's Friends**

Tugger and Misto soon made their way back to the clearing they had come from to see who they could get to come out with them that night for some fun. Misto was rather quiet as they went and held on to Tugger's paw tightly as he thought nervously about what was to happen later on. He replayed the things Tugger had said about these other cats he knew and he was a little bit uneasy at the prospect of meeting them in the fur. If they were the types of cat that Tugger used to bring home from one of his nights out then in some ways he knew what to expect and didn't feel much draw towards the idea. Still, he did his best to look keen so his mate wouldn't think he was a scaredy-cat and he carried on walking as Tugger strode excitedly ahead. The bigger tom was talking about something but Misto had zoned out a short while ago since he had been deep in thought. Tugger soon caught on to the fact that Misto wasn't listening and would have asked him if something were that matter had they not just arrived in the clearing. He happily trotted off and out of sight leaving Misto alone with his thoughts as he stood in the moonlight that bathed the area. As he mulled things over different questions that made him more and more nervous started to circulate in his mind and he began to shuffle uncomfortably as they stuck around. What if those cats made Tugger even more Tuggerish than usual? Would he suddenly realise that mating to Misto was a terrible mistake? That was silly though, right? Tugger loved him, he wouldn't just run off. Even so, would he still wish he could be carefree and be like he was? And what if one of those cats or even all of them didn't like him? Would they turn on him and leave him somewhere in the middle of the city while making sure Tugger didn't know about it? Would Tugger let them do that even if he did know?

Misto bit his lip and stared off into nothingness as he continued to think. He was so lost in his worry that he didn't notice Jemima come over to him with a friendly smile on her face looking to shoot the breeze with her friend. The young queen puzzled when Misto didn't seem to notice her and she narrowed her eyebrows as she examined the tux before her.

"Misto? Hello?" she called gently

The black and white tom jolted himself out of his daze and shook his head when he noticed the queen suddenly standing in front of him.

"Jemima? How long have you been there?"

"I just got here. Are you alright?"

Misto rubbed his head fur and took a deep breath before replying, "Yeah, I'm fine. There's just something on my mind"

"Is it bad?"

"No, I don't think so, just…well, I'm not sure. Tugger wants to take some of us out on the town"

Jemima lit up instantly, "Really? Can I come?"

Misto smiled weakly, "I'm sure you may. In fact I'd like it if you were there to keep me calm"

"Calm? What do you mean calm? And why is Tugger taking us out a bad thing?"

Misto sighed, "It's just that he intends to introduce us to his other friends"

"Is that bad?"

"Well, they're the type he hung out with before he mated to me"

"You think they're no good?"

"Not necessarily. I just reckon they're…well, you know, a bad influence"

Jemima smirked, "A bad influence? You sound like Jenny"

Misto blushed. Maybe he was being silly, he couldn't quite tell. He trusted Jemima though so if she thought it was okay then it probably would be.

"Alright, maybe I'm over-thinking things" he said changing his tone, "You think it will be alright?"

"It sounds like fun. Come on, what's the worst that could happen?"

"I dread to think when it's Tugger"

"Well, you'll be there to rein him in if he does get a bit out of control"

"Hmm. Alright, I guess we'll just take it as it goes"

"There you go. Now who else is coming?"

"I haven't a clue"

* * *

Tugger scampered around looking for the cats he had in mind to take out that night. He jumped up and down over the junk as he searched and one by one happened upon the Jellicles he was looking for.

"Hey, Alonzo! Wanna come out tonight?"

"Where are we going?" called back the black and white patched tom

"Out on the town. You game?"

"Sure"

'_One down' _thought Tugger as he carried on. It wasn't long before he found Plato, Victor, Victoria, Exotica, Skimble – making sure not to let Jenny know - and Cassandra and even though he had wondered about asking Munkustrap he decided it would probably be rude not to ask him to come too. He was even more pleased when his brother declined and decided to stick around to watch the junkyard. While he was there he asked Demeter if she'd like to go with them as well and she said she would if Bomba were going. On that note Tugger jumped over to her den and climbed straight in without announcing himself in the slightest. He found the queen grooming herself in quite a compromising position and she startled and tried to correct herself quickly when she saw Tugger barge in rudely. Her frantic movements gave her more trouble than they did help and within seconds she was sprawled out across the floor making Tugger laugh at the sight.

"It's very rude to barge in on a lady" she said as she pushed herself back up

"Good thing there's no lady here" responded Tugger cheekily.

"Oi! I'm more of a lady than you'll ever get"

"Don't need one, I'm perfectly happy with my tom, thank you"

"Mmm" hummed Bomba quietly. She found it strange that in some small way she still wished it was her that Tugger had fallen for. She was happy that he and Misto were together but all the same she sort of wished it could have been her. "What can I do for you?"

"A bunch of us are going out into the city. Do you want to come?"

"Is Deme going?"

"She said she would if you would"

"Alright. I'll be out in a bit"

"Cool" said Tugger as he turned to leave. As Bomba watched him go she took in how magnificent he looked and remembered how she used to wonder if they would ever get together properly. She and Demeter used to say it would be great if they would since then between them they would have both of the brothers. Still, it was as it was: Tugger was taken and it seemed he had never really wished for anything more than their fleeting rolls in the hay anyway. Although it rubbed at her she wanted him to know she was glad he'd found happiness and in a split-second decision she called out to him before he left.

"Tugger, wait!"

The tom stopped and turned looking annoyingly disinterested in whatever it was she had to say. Why was it he always had to treat her with such disdain and more importantly why did she love it so much?

"Hm?" was all Tugger said

Bomba thought for a minute as she hadn't quite decided what it was she wanted to say. After a moment of silence that was just a little too long to be comfortable she managed to speak,

"I just wanted to say…uh…I'm happy for you"

Tugger raised an eyebrow, "Why?"

"Err…You and Misto. It's nice to see you've found the right one"

"You already said you were happy for us"

"Did I?"

"I think so, I can't really remember"

"Oh. Well, I just want you to know I really mean it" she said timidly even though in her heart she knew that wasn't exactly how she felt.

"Okay, thanks"

"I suppose you and I were never really meant to be"

"Nope" replied Tugger with considerable ease making the queen feel no better. Still, she carried on,

"I don't think you could have found anybody better" Again, not the exact way she felt.

"I think you're right, Bomba, he is pretty great"

"Pretty great? Is anything wrong?" she asked curiously

"What? No, no, of course not. He's amazing. I love him and he makes me incredibly happy. Does it seem otherwise to you?"

"Oh no. I just thought because you said _pretty_ great instead of just great"

"Well, he's just great I assure you"

"Well that's good. I've wondered maybe if he's still a little uncertain because he's quite young and such. Maybe he's still figuring himself out"

"I know he's still figuring out his magic but he seems to be pretty on the ball with everything else"

Bomba couldn't help herself from asking the next question as she was just to curious to see how she compared, "Is he, um…satisfactory…at, um…you know?"

Tugger raised an eyebrow so Bomba pushed a little further,

"I mean…in the bedroom?"

"Is that really any of your business?" asked Tugger a little indignantly

"Well, I don't think you and I have any secrets about that anymore, Tugs. We've certainly been around the block together a few times"

"Yeah, but…come on, it's different now. I'm with him and he does it differently to how you did it. Look, it feels weird to be discussing it with you"

"Doesn't he measure up?" Bomba knew she was digging herself a hole but she didn't feel as if she could stop herself.

"He does just fine" said Tugger more firmly

"Just fine. Right"

"Well, more than just fine. Do you really need to know?"

"No, no. I think you've given me a pretty good idea"

Tugger felt very conflicted. Strangely it felt weird to be discussing his and Misto's sex life with his ex-lover but at the same time he didn't want her to think that Misto wasn't up to the job.

"Look, Misto is really good at what he does and he's perfectly capable of keeping me satisfied. And remember it is me so I think you can judge for yourself just how capable he is"

"Uh huh. Little nymphomaniac is he?"

Tugger was getting annoyed now, "Everlasting, Bomba! No we're not having sex all the time or any more than a regular couple for that matter. Aside from that he's perfectly good at it. If anything he's helped me calm down from how crazy I used to be so I hope you can see how much more important our relationship is than just sex. By the same token I hope you can see just why my relationship with him is way more important than anything you and I ever had. Why the hell are you so interested anyway? Jealous?"

Bomba felt as if she was being cornered and realised maybe she'd probed a little too deeply. Why did she have to be so nosy when it came to Tugger? Feeling defeated she back-peddled quickly,

"No. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to pry. I was just curious as to whether he was good enough for you. I didn't mean to cause offence"

"Good enough for me? He's perfectly fine, in fact he's the best thing that's ever happened to me. He makes me happy and no one has ever done that before, not even you"

Bomba winced internally but put on a brave face, "I'm glad. Please don't get me wrong"

"So why is our private life so important to you?"

Bomba looked down, "I guess I just wish I could have the same thing. You know there's no one around here for me"

Tugger responded with cautious sympathy, "Well, even so I think I'd prefer to keep mine and Misto's affairs private, if you don't mind. I'm sure you'll find somebody somewhere."

"Maybe. I'm sorry for being so nosy"

"That's okay. Now, we're going out. Don't be too long or we'll leave you behind" he said as he turned again and left the den.

Bomba was left alone looking at the spot where he had been. She wondered why she was doing that because she knew she didn't love him. Or did she? Was she just desperate to have someone? Anyone for that matter? Was it because Tugger was the closest thing she'd ever had to a mate? Maybe. She did her best to put it all out of her mind for now; she and Demeter would have a lot to discuss later.

* * *

In the clearing the cats Tugger had invited out were gathering slowly and the kittens hung around curiously wondering what was about to happen. They pestered Victoria since she was closest to their age and the young white queen did her best to change the subject as they constantly battered her with questions. She happily got away from them when she noticed Misto and Jemima coming to join the group and in a second she was over with them.

"This all sounds kinda cool, huh? I've never really been out on the town before" said Victoria

"Me either" said Jemima happily, "It sounds really fun"

"I suppose…" said Misto quietly

"You suppose?" asked Victoria, "What's wrong with you?"

"Don't ask" Jemima told her, "He's just nervous because he thinks Tugger will go a bit wild"

"Well it is Tugger. Of course he'll be wild"

"You're not helping" said Misto, "I just don't want him to forget about me"

"He won't forget" said Victoria giving her brother a shove, "He'll probably want to show you off"

Misto smiled weakly at that. He certainly wouldn't mind being shown off as Tugger's mate and as he thought about it he loosened up a little bit. Before he had time to speak again Tugger came up behind and wrapped his arms around him while planting a quick kiss on his cheek. The tux just smiled back at him and lightly asked,

"Ready to go?"

"Sure. Is everyone here?"

"I think so. Lead the way, dear"

Tugger grimaced a little but then looked sarcastic, "Dear? What am I, your darling wife?"

"You're my mate, I can call you dear if I want"

"Only if I can call you Misty"

"Alright, fine. No dear"

"Good choice. Okay everyone, let's go!" called Tugger as he jumped ahead and beckoned everyone forward.

As the bunch of cats headed toward to junkyard entrance the kittens did their best to look inconspicuous and follow them. They had nearly made it out of the junkyard when they heard a shrill tone behind them.

"Where do you think you're all going?" came the voice. Everyone turned around to see a motherly old queen coming at them with a strong authority on her face. In the blink of an eye she gathered up the kittens and frog-marched them all back inside making the rest of the Jellicles smirk as she bent them to her will.

As they went to carry on they heard another voice call out to them,

"Wait for me!"

Bomba – having missed their exit by a few moments huffed irately as she jumped down from her den and ran after them. Why was Tugger treating her with such contempt even now? As she caught up to them she muttered a few things to Deme and the black and gold queen just rolled her eyes.

The group of Jellicles didn't waste time in getting to where they were going and adopted a quick pace with Tugger at the head of the pack leading the way.

* * *

As Misto walked along his mind drifted from the conversation he was supposed to be involved in with Victoria and Jemima at either side. Although he had been told everything would be fine he was still worried that something bad might happen, or if not bad then certainly something that would make Tugger go off the rails. Then again, was Tugger ever really on the rails? Sure, he'd calmed down a little bit since being mated but he was still as outrageous as ever. Misto wondered if there was really anything to worry about and did his best to tell himself there wasn't. Putting his thoughts aside he pulled away from his female escorts and hurried up to Tugger who was chatting loudly with Alonzo as he led them into the centre of London.

Taking his arm Misto smiled up at his mate and spoke, "Are we there yet?"

"Almost, babe. Happy to be out of the junkyard?"

"If you can show me a good time then I'm sure I will be"

Tugger smirked, "I reckon you'll enjoy it. Not far to go now"

Misto looked around at where he was and smiled when he remembered some of the sights he'd seen before when Tugger took him out on dates. As a group they moved along the same route Tugger had taken Misto on their first date and Misto smiled wider when he realised they were heading in the direction of Piccadilly circus and the fountain in its centre - the place he'd been absolutely mesmerized by not long ago. His happiness was cut short when Tugger quickly veered them down a much darker, unfamiliar street and the spaces between the buildings grew narrower making Misto feel somehow smaller. Electric lights shone around them but in colours that Misto had only ever seen as a product of his magic. Strange, thumping sounds that Misto assumed was loud human music echoed around them as they went further into this strange looking world and the small tom hung on to Tugger more tightly as he was lead further in. Tugger seemingly unfazed by the sights that made Misto nervous smiled as he reacquainted himself with a place he felt he'd been away from for far too long. He wondered why he hadn't thought of bringing Misto here sooner since he really loved being where everything was so carefree.

Rounding a few more corners Tugger quickened his pace when he saw the place he had wanted to bring the others and his mate to. The other Jellicles hurried along to keep up with him and Misto clung closer still as they approached a strange looking building bathed in blue light with humans gathered outside it.

"What is this place, Tugger?" he asked quietly

Tugger didn't respond as he was too excited to soon be letting loose. Without really looking where he was going he suddenly veered off down a slim alley next to the glowing, thumping building and trotted along to a small gap in the brickwork about halfway down. With a quick smile to Misto he jumped in and vanished into the darkness. Misto didn't really know what he was getting himself in for and stepped back as the other Jellicles passed him and followed Tugger. A moment later he was the only one left outside and looked around in the dark, seedy alley feeling very on edge. Not wanting to remain alone he cautiously stepped into the gap and took several paces in complete darkness before he noticed the light start to pick up again. The same thumping he had heard outside was louder in here and a few seconds later he found himself in a fairly large open space – at least to a cat - glowing faintly in the same blue light he had seen on the front of the building. Around him he could see a great number of cats he had never seen before and became uneasy when he couldn't see a single one of the Jellicles. He looked up at the ceiling and noticed the light filtering through cracks in the floorboards with the sound of loud human voices coupled with their music emanating through it. Putting these observations together he assumed he must have been in one of those places he had heard about that humans congregate in at night and along with the other cats he must have been in some kind of space beneath the floorboards.

As he brought his eyes back down he noticed that many of the unfamiliar cats were dancing but not in the way he had become accustomed to back in the junkyard. This kind of dancing involved a lot more contact and looked much less graceful. The cats rubbed against each other in strange ways and jumped around in what seemed to Misto like some kind of mating display. Clearly this was not a side of cat culture he had ever expected to be exposed to and he bit his lip as he started to feel very out of place.

A moment or two later - through the darkness - he noticed a few of the new cats looking at him with strange expressions on their faces. Misto tried to smile politely back and started to step forward hoping they wouldn't bother him. Carefully he made his way through the crowd and looked around for sign of any familiar face. He began to feel annoyed that Tugger had just left him to find his own way but that didn't seem to matter too much at that moment, he was just desperate to see someone he knew. Minutes went by and he started to whip his head from side to side looking desperately for anyone. Mercifully, across the crowd and up on top of what appeared to Misto as an overturned crate he saw Jemima and Victoria sitting together and laughing happily as they involved themselves in the ambiance. Without waiting he made a beeline for them and hopped on the crate glad to get away from the dancing cats around him.

"Hey, Misto! Where did you get to?" asked Jemima over the loud atmosphere

"I'm not sure. I came in and everyone seemed to have disappeared"

"Take a look, you can see everyone from up here" she said gesturing across the crowd below them. Misto looked out and saw she was right: if he looked carefully he could make out all of the cats he had come with. They were either dancing in the crowd or sitting off to the side just enjoying themselves. Misto would have felt more relaxed had the one cat he wanted to locate been visible.

"Where's Tugger?" he asked the pair.

"He's getting us something to drink" replied Victoria

"A drink?" asked Misto perking his ears up. He was quite thirsty after that walk and he felt a little more at ease to think that Tugger was doing something nice for him. Unfortunately for him he was about to be proven very wrong. "Where?"

"Over there" said Victoria as she pointed to a corner where a large bottle sat with cats gathered around it. Misto looked but he still didn't see his mate.

Tugger was making his way around the crowd already carrying a small shot-glass filled with clear liquid that at his size was actually quite big. With a sneaky smile on his face he climbed up to the trio on top of the crate and sat down with them. He placed the glass in the centre of their circle and brought Misto over with one arm to lean against him. He placed a quick kiss on top of his mate's head and then spoke to him,

"How do you like this place?"

Misto put on a pretend smile so as not to look like a killjoy, "It's nice. Very loud"

Tugger laughed and kissed him again, "I knew you'd like it"

Before Misto could respond he felt the crate vibrate with soft impact and he looked up to see four other cats around them looking down with sly smiles. Misto flattened his ears to his head as they seemed to examine them and wondered what was about to happen. Each of them had different marking but black made up a large part of all of their coats while being individualized with splashes of other colours and styles. Misto was wondering what to say before one of the new cats looked over at Tugger and spoke first,

"Well look what the cat dragged in"

"Sure been a while since you showed your sorry arse around here" said another

"Maybe I just got bored of hanging around with you losers" said Tugger with a smile as he got up. Misto puzzled as he watched his mate rub affectionately against each of these other cats and banter back and forth with them.

"How's it going, Tug?" asked the one with ginger blotches on him

"Not bad, thanks. How are things here?" replied the Maine Coon

"Better now you're back. Where've you been?"

"I've been a little preoccupied" he said with a smile and giving a quick glance to Misto

"Well, at least you're back now. So what do we have here?" said the queen with a large amount of grey on her as she looked around at Tugger's companions. To Misto she looked a little bit scary since she was quite thin and had eyes that were very piercing. She was rather pretty but still the tux had a feeling that he probably shouldn't trust her too readily. This was all the more driven home when he felt her eyes run over him and examine him very finely.

"These are a few of my friends I've brought out this evening. None of them have ever been to a place like this before so I thought it might be fun for them to see."

"I see" said the queen slyly, "Who's this lovely looking little thing?" she said as she got down close to Jemima and started fiddling with the fur on her head. The younger queen just sat still and tried to look comfortable as the other invaded her personal space.

"That's Jemima and over there is Victoria" said Tugger gesturing to the white queen.

"Well, it's nice to see such good-looking fresh meat around here" said another of the unfamiliar toms moving alongside Victoria and giving her the once over. A moment later he moved over quickly to Misto and locked eyes with him while giving him a menacing half-smile. The tux felt his heart beat faster and his fur prickled up a little bit as the cat scrutinized his face and stared him down.

"Very nice indeed" said the cat again as he started to move around Misto while the other cats moved over to join him in his examination. Misto just sat still and looked up to Tugger silently wishing he'd do something about them.

"And what's this?" asked the queen as she slowly circled Misto smiling. "This one certainly seems like he needs to unwind. How do you fancy it, tux? Wanna be shown a good time?"

Misto was begging Tugger with his eyes now; he really didn't know what to do and he needed Tugger to do something about the queen.

The bigger tom noticed how uncomfortable his mate looked and chuckled at the small tom's expression before bending down and pulling Misto into his arms.

"Well guys, you're not going to believe this but I'd like to introduce you to my mate, The Magical Mister Mistoffelees"

The cats all stopped dead as soon as Tugger said that and stared brutally down at Misto. Had The Rum Tum Tugger actually just said that this tiny little cat was his mate? Surely not.

"Your mate, Tug?" asked the queen

"That's right" replied Tugger nuzzling Misto.

The cats stayed in silence for a long time as they looked at the pair and tried to come to terms with the idea that Tugger might actually be telling the truth. Tugger didn't mate to cats, no one was ever good enough for him and that's why he was such a player. Could it be that their buddy was tied down?

Misto flinched when he felt the grey and black queen pull him out of Tugger's grasp and barely had time to come to terms with what was happening before she had started pulling him around. Within the seconds the other cats were doing the same thing and Misto suddenly felt extremely violated as they yanked and manipulated his body.

"Well, it's certainly got a pretty little face" said queen as she brought her paw up to his cheeks and squeezed them, "Pretty little eyes and pretty little lips too"

"And not a bad little body either despite being a bit small" said another of the toms that hadn't spoken yet but had been leering at Misto the entire time he had been around.

"I think I can see why you like it Tugger" said the queen

"Him" said Misto shaking them off and trying not to scowl at them for being so invasive.

"Oooh, it has a temper" said the queen feeling smug that she was rubbing the tux the wrong way both in the literal since and the metaphorical. "I guess you like a little fire in the ones you bed, huh Tug?"

Misto was getting quite annoyed now and decided to speak on his mate's behalf, "For your information I'm not just some cat Tugger dragged back to bed. We love each other"

That made the other cats snigger.

"Love each other? Come on, Tugger doesn't love anyone" said the tom with ginger patches.

"Yes he does" said the Maine Coon pulling Misto close again. "I've changed guys. Mistoffelees is my life now, I've been hooked"

Misto looked around at the cats who seemed quite taken aback at Tugger's admission. Perhaps it really was true that the biggest player in town was off the market. A long moment passed with the loudness around them being the only thing they heard before the queen spoke again,

"Well, fuck me! I guess pigs really do fly"

"Got that right" said one of the toms

Tugger just smiled at Misto and suddenly the tux didn't feel quite so nervous anymore. Tugger was actually displaying some solidarity and it filled him warmth that his mate was glad to say in front of his friends that he was happier with him.

"Sorry, guys. He's mine now" said Misto feeling braver now as he looked around at them. The other cats looked around at each other and shrugged lightly but not without sly smiles.

"Well then, I'm sure any mate of Tugger's can be a friend of ours" said the queen. Changing her tone she looked at the other two and included them in the next part of their conversation, "So, never been out on the town before, eh? Well, it's probably time to show you just how much fun you can have"

The queen lifted up the glass Tugger had brought over earlier and looked between each of the new cats she had before her. She settled on Misto and turned to him offering the drink held within.

"Give this a try, sweetheart. It'll blow your mind"

Misto took the glass from her and looked down at its contents wondering what she meant. To him it just looked like water, how was that meant to blow his mind? Since he was quite thirsty he shrugged off what she'd said and brought to glass to his lips. In one quick, uncaring motion he took a big gulp from it and immediately widened his eyes and tensed his body. He slammed the glass back down on top of the crate and spat out what he had sipped spraying it everywhere. Whatever it was it most certainly was not water and he sat there coughing and spluttering as he tried to breath over the vile taste that lingered. It was nothing like he had ever tasted before – it was incredibly strong but didn't have a particular flavour, it was just a very strong taste whatever it was and it assaulted his mouth, nose and even made his eyes sting a little.

"What the hell is that?" asked Misto as he started to regain his breath

The strange cats just laughed amongst themselves as they watched him react.

"Something that humans drink. Never tasted alcohol before, eh?" said the queen smirking

"No" responded Misto, "It's horrible!"

"Try again. It'll get better"

Misto looked around at Tugger who had a similar expression of amusement and just nodded at him to give it another go. Misto begrudgingly lifted the glass again and not wanting to disappoint anyone raised it to his lips. Once again he tasted the incredibly strong liquid and held it in his mouth as he summoned up the strength to swallow it. After a second or two he flicked his head back and forced the foul fluid down his throat. Instantly he screwed his eyes shut and stuck out his tongue in discontent. How could anybody find that enjoyable?

"Well done, kid. Don't worry, it'll get easier from here on" said the queen as she took the glass from him and held it out to Victoria. "Bottoms up, missy" she said as the white queen nervously took it from her.

* * *

Across the room Bomba and Demeter sat together chatting. Between them they had one of the drinks Tugger had brought to Misto, Jemima and Victoria and not being new to it Bomba wasn't holding back in sucking down the fluid as she related her feelings to her friend.

"I mean, why can't I just get over him, Deme? It's not like I really want to be with him anymore but something's telling me I kinda do"

"Have you told him about any of this?"

Bomba took another drink, "Of course not. I'm happy he and Misto are together but I just kinda wish it was me"

"But he treated you like dirt. Surely that's enough to get over him"

"You'd think so, wouldn't you? I guess I just like the bad-boy type"

"That's always been your problem" said Deme smiling, "Remember Macavity?"

Bomba grimaced and buried her face in her arms on the table, "Don't! I really don't think we need to remember that"

Deme chuckled, "Even so, hun, I'm sure there's someone out there for you. You just haven't found him yet"

"Yeah, I guess. I just want him to come to me now, Deme! Why can't I have him?"

Demeter shrugged, "Maybe he's closer than you think. In the meantime you just need to forget about Tugger. He and Misto are happy and I'm sure you don't want to ruin that"

"You're right" moaned Bomba. Looking up and taking a deep breath she lifted the glass in front of her. "Here's to finding Mr. Right soon" she said before drinking down every last drop of the alcohol she held. Deme's eyes widened as she watched the red queen suck it down – Bomba certainly could drink! As the red queen brought the glass back down she screwed up her face and shook her head from side to side trying to make the taste disappear. Deme knew she'd have to keep an eye on Bomba that night, after all bad things tended to happen when Bomba got drunk.

**So Bomba's drinking her troubles away, huh? Surely nothing bad can happen from that.**

**Thanks for reading, next chapter shouldn't be too long. As always I adore your reviews and I appreciate the comments and criticism.**


	3. Misto Sure Can Dance

**Here we are again then and this time Misto starts loosening up. **

**WARNING: Bad language**

**Love Is No Fairytale**

**Chapter 3**

**Misto Sure Can Dance**

The queen that had encouraged him to force down the vile-tasting liquid had been right: it did get easier with every sip. Misto started to experience a warm feeling within him and within the last few minutes had begun to wonder what he had fussed about in the first place. In the back of his mind he still felt that these new cats ought not to be trusted but the voice telling him that seemed far away by now. It had grown quieter and quieter with each strenuous swallow of the alcohol before him and the tux felt a smile starting to spread across his face. Similarly, Jemima and Victoria seemed to bear the same goofy grin and as the seconds ticked by they all seemed to be enjoying themselves immensely. As they chatted Misto remained sitting with Tugger as the bigger tom knocked back the booze along with his friends. Misto watched as his mate put away gulp after gulp with incredible ease and could see the bigger tom was no stranger to the tipple. The small tom attempted to listen to what they were talking about but found it hard to make out words above the noisiness of the room. To him that wasn't incredibly important though for Victoria had started to produce the most adorable little hiccups. In her own way she did her best to control the violent jolts she experienced every few seconds and Misto and Jemima found her embarrassed attempts hilarious.

"It's not funny!" said the white queen as she held a paw to her mouth in an attempt to hide her hiccups and the smile that was resulting from her friends' giggling. It wasn't long before she joined them and they all sat around laughing as the bigger cats observed their first experience with alcohol. With a sly smile between the queen and one of the toms another glass filled with a different coloured liquid soon found it's way to the centre of their circle.

"What's this?" asked Misto chuckling as he picked up the glass and examined its contents. The drink inside was a bright red colour and had a strong smell of cherries making the small tom lick his lips.

"It's good" said Tugger feeling the effects of the booze now himself, "give it a shot!"

Without waiting Misto brought the glass to his mouth and took a big drink. This one tasted just as strong as the one earlier but was easier to swallow due to how sweet it was. Misto couldn't take too much at once but the amount he did drink left him with a great big smile and a red ring around his mouth. Jemima and Victoria eagerly took the glass and passed it between them taking sips and displaying the same reaction as Misto. To the others Victoria looked the funniest as her usually pristine white face had a strong pink tinge to it after she brought the glass away. The group laughed loudly as they looked amongst each other and pretty soon the red drink was gone as well.

As Misto continued to laugh with the others his head started to feel much lighter and it wasn't long before his thoughts became swishy and his sense of modesty started to leave him. Spinning his head around and quickly finding he needed to steady himself he gazed up his mate who looked back with the same droopy yet determined eyes. Misto spoke first,

"Hey, Tug!" he called joyfully

"Hey, Babe!" replied the bigger tom.

"Thanks for bringing me out tonight"

"That's alright, darling, I'm glad you're enjoying it. You are, aren't you?"

"Yep! Yes I am! Everything's marvellous! Everyone's so beautiful!"

Tugger chuckled and nuzzled his mate before responding, "I see you're enjoying the drinks"

Misto smiled back sloppily, "You bet I am! Speakin' of which, how 'bout another?"

"I gotcha covered" said one the queen as she jumped down and disappeared into the crowd.

"You're friends seem lovely" said Misto, "Have you known them long?"

"Long enough" replied Tugger

"Do you love them?"

"I wouldn't say I love them, Misty, they're just my pals"

"Don't call me Misty!" yelled Misto a little too loudly but still happily making Jemima and Victoria startle and then sway as they sat there. Misto noticed them succumbing to the effects of the alcohol but didn't put it down to that cause. He began to giggle as he looked at Jemima leaning against one of the unfamiliar toms while smiling at him with her face very close to his and being incredibly friendly. The tom just responded politely to her tipsy attempt at a conversation and exchanged jokey glances with his friend that sat at her other side. Bringing his gaze across the circle Misto looked over to Victoria and giggled even more when he saw her staring straight ahead into the abyss with her eyes seemingly unfocused. Her head very gently lolled from side to side and as it did her body went with it; to Misto it just looked funny but to the other cats there that had a clue it was certain that the white queen was starting to feel the effects of her first drinks.

A moment later Misto looked up to Tugger again and feeling even more confident started to drag himself up the Maine Coon's body. Tugger watched him as he attempted to force himself upwards and in the end decided to help him in his efforts. Feeling successful Misto threw his arms around the tom's neck and forced their lips together in a very messy kiss while tightening his grip around him. Tugger was thrown off guard in the first few seconds but then kissed his tom fervently back, neither one caring who saw them; for Tugger this was just how a regular night out went for him and as for Misto, well he simply didn't care. All he wanted to do was kiss his tom as the alcohol now inside his body somehow made him feel a thousand times more in love with his mate. Then again, he also felt he loved Victoria and Jemima about a thousand times more at that moment and he even felt he loved the new cats around him that he had only known for the past half an hour. Pulling away from Tugger slightly he giggled crazily into the tom's lips and Tugger pushed him back further for some space.

"You're so hot, Tugger" said Misto devilishly, "I love you"

"I love you too, Misto" said Tugger smiling, "Hey, watch out!"

Misto turned his head to see the queen climbing back up onto the crate with yet another glass of something and this time Misto didn't waste any time in examining the liquid. As soon as she set it down the tux grabbed it and glugged down a huge amount of it before stopping to taste. Bringing it away from his lips he staggered on his knees and began spilling the remaining drink before managing to thrust it into his sister's paws. Victoria jolted as she felt the glass forced into her lap and took a moment to reorder her thoughts before gladly taking another drink herself. Again the glass made it's way around the circle and once it was gone they all sat around laughing.

A few moments later Tugger stood up abruptly and pulled Misto along with him. Turning his head to the rest of the group he pointed over his shoulder down to the floor where many cats were jumping around each other wildly. With a flash of his gorgeous smile he shouted to them,

"Let's dance!"

* * *

Demeter sat stunned as she watched Bomba put away yet another drink all by herself and she jerked her paws outward ready to catch the red queen as she swayed from side to side seeming as if she'd topple at any second.

"Don't you think you've had enough now, Bomba?" asked the black and gold queen cautiously. Bomba looked at her with a hazy sneer and raised her paw attempting to point at her friend before she spoke,

"Do I look like I've forgotten about being alone yet?" she slurred

"You're not totally alone, dear. I'm here"

"Yeah? So do you wanna be my mate then?" said Bomba spitefully

Demeter just gave her friend sympathetic eyes in response. Bomba continued,

"There you are then. Let me deal with this the best way"

"You think drinking your troubles away will-"

"Look at him over there" interrupted Bomba as she flung her arm roughly in the direction of where they could see Tugger and Misto moving into the crowd of dancing cats, "Weren't I good enough for him? That bastard never even gave me the time of day unless he wanted a shag"

"Bomba! Would you please try and keep your voice down" hissed Demeter as she noticed some cats around them look their way.

"Why? I mean, shouldn't the whole world know what a wanker he is?"

"You don't mean that, Bomba. You know you don't"

Bomba looked back from the crowd and planted her face in one paw with her eyes closed. She really did look drunk and Demeter tried to think of ways to get her friend to slow down. After a few seconds Bomba spoke through her fingers,

"You're right. I just want someone now; is that so much to ask?" Looking to her right Bomba laid eyes on a fairly young-looking tom and turned her body in his direction before getting up and clinging to him. The tom startled as the inebriated red queen grabbed him and politely tried to support her as she lay against him. Bomba spoke loudly in his face, "How about you, kitten? Wanna spend some time with hot queen? Maybe get her another drink? What do you say?"

"I, uh…I don't know if…Are you…um" stammered the tom as he tried to control Bomba's slowly exploring paws.

At that moment Demeter shot up and pulled Bomba away from the poor, traumatized tom and turned her friend away before looking back and saying, "Sorry". She protested a little but Bomba didn't put up much of a fight as she was dragged away from the cat she had propositioned and she used Demeter to support her while she did her best to balance.

"Bomba, sweetheart, you've got to calm down!" said Demeter worriedly, "You don't want to get yourself into trouble"

"Aw, who gives a crap?" said Bomba haggardly, "Ain't no one around here who wants me anyway. If Tugger don't want me then what hope is there anyone else will?"

"You said earlier you were happy for him. Come on, babe, you know you're happy he and Misto got together"

"But why couldn't it have been me?" asked Bomba sadly as she managed to support her body by herself

"Because it just wasn't meant to be. Don't get worked up about it; I promise you'll find someone"

Bomba just pouted and staggered forward to hug Demeter, "I love you Deme. You're such a good friend"

"I love you too, Bomba" giggled Demeter

"No, I mean it! You're a freakin' awesome"

"A freakin' awesome what?"

"Just freakin' awesome. I wish you were a tom"

Demeter just laughed and stood back from Bomba, "Come on, let's dance off some of that alcohol"

Somehow Bomba made it into the crowd and started to move in time to the music – or at least near enough in time.

* * *

Misto happily jumped straight into the action and the loud, thumping sounds he had heard before that assaulted his ears now didn't seem so bad. He felt now he could feel more of a rhythm to it and the strange sounds almost commanded him to loosen up. As he began to sway in time with the music he caught sight of some of the cats he knew around him and for some reason felt he loved them a lot more than he had done before arriving there. As he continued to turn he saw Alonzo dancing in the crowd and didn't hesitate in lunging at him, throwing his arms around his neck and hugging him tightly while laughing hysterically and confessing his undying love for the other Jellicle.

"Oi. I love you, you know that?" yelled Misto above the roar of the crowd

"That's nice" replied Alonzo with a smirk as he took in the drunk Misto

"No, no, no, I mean it! You're alright, Lonzy!" He began to laugh even more as he called him that and the tom had to stop him from loosing his balance and falling to the ground in his hilarity. Tugger – feeling light-headed and really quite drunk – took a little initiative and stepped forward to relieve Alonzo of the clutching tux.

"Tugger!" shrieked Misto joyfully as he turned to see his mate and placed several sloppy kisses on his face. Tugger just laughed and gripped Misto's head lightly in his paws before bringing their faces close together and speaking,

"You're so drunk!"

A few seconds of mad giggling between them passed before the smaller tom responded, "No, you're so drunk!"

"No, you!"

"No, you!"

More hysterical giggling.

"I love you! You know that?" yelled Tugger with a huge grin

"Love you too, sugar!" shouted back Misto.

"Now then, show me just how good a dancer you are"

"You know how well I can dance!"

"Then dance for me, Misty!"

"I'm not Misty!" yelled Misto before pushing himself away from the bigger tom into a small opening in the centre of the crowd of cats and starting to make a few of his moves. Tugger smiled and bopped along as he watched Misto glide gracefully across the floor and it wasn't long before he'd garnered attention from many of the other cats. The opening Misto was in began to grow wider as more cats noticed him and they all stepped back to watch his spectacular display. Pretty soon most of the crowd was marvelling at the amazing skill of the tux they had never seen before.

Tugger looked around the circle at their admiring faces and suddenly felt incredibly proud that he belonged to Misto and that Misto belonged to him. It made him feel quite warm inside to have someone so talented, so graceful and so beautiful to call his own and he stopped moving with the music as he felt some emotion rise in his throat. The big, sexy tom had to bite his lip to stop himself from choking and shook his head from side to side to try and clear his thoughts. How would it look if he, The Rum Tum Tugger, shed a tear in front of all the cats he had built up a reputation with over how happy he was to have a mate like Misto? Then again, why shouldn't he be proud? He could get emotional over how much he loved Misto if he wanted, couldn't he? After all he did love him that much. Then again, maybe it was the booze in his head that was making him a little emotionally unstable and what's more it wouldn't be the strangest thing that had ever happened to him while he had been drunk. After taking a moment to centre himself he brought himself back into the present and focused on Misto again. By now the crowd was cheering for him as he begun his signature move that the Jellicles had become familiar with in previous Jellicle Balls: his Conjuring Turn. Tugger exchanged a quick glance with Victoria and Jemima behind him and he could see they had the same sense of worry on their faces. They all knew Misto was drunk and seemingly getting drunker by the second so all of the spinning in his Conjuring Turn surely couldn't be a good mix. Tugger turned back to look at his mate as he twirled around and around and bared his teeth with worry as he waited for the tux to topple. Admittedly, Misto was doing quite well and had so far managed about six spins. Round and round he went and sure enough Tugger started to notice him wobble on the leg he was using to turn on. Still the tux carried on but by the time he got to about the tenth turn he leant over too far in one direction and started to fall with is arms flailing wildly as he tried to correct himself. Tugger shot out reaching for his mate but Misto hit the floor before Tugger could catch him. Above the music there was an audible thud and several of the cats at the circle's edge jumped back as Misto fell at their feet. Tugger rushed over to the little tom and flipped him over so he was lying on his back.

"Are you alright, darling?" he asked looking into Misto's droopy, unfocused eyes.

"Ooh dear. What happened?" asked Misto dizzily as he looked up and around at the dark room.

Tugger's worried expression softened as he realised his mate was alright, "You got over-confident and tried to do your conjuring turn"

Misto raised an eyebrow and grinned goofily, "Was it awesome?"

Tugger sniggered, "Yeah, sure, it was awesome. Come on, sparkles". He took Misto's paws and pulled him onto his feet. By now the crowd had spilled across the circle and were dancing again like Misto hadn't even been there. Tugger guided him with one arm around his shoulders using the other to make a gap in the crowd to take him to the side again. "I think maybe you could use another drink"

"That sounds nice" replied Misto as he staggered out of the group of dancing cats with a fuzzy mind and made for the same crate he had been sitting on earlier. Tugger – with considerable effort – managed to push him up onto it and told him to wait there while he turned back to find another glass of something for them. As Misto sat swaying lightly his sister and Jemima joined him as they emerged from the crowd as well.

"Hey gals. Did you see me dancing?" he slurred

"Sure did. You were great!" yelled Jemima

"You fell down" giggled Victoria, "It was hilarious!"

"Shut up!" snorted Misto as he fell onto his sister and laughed along with her. When he straightened himself up he threw his arms in the air and loudly exclaimed, "I'm having such a great time! I can't believe I thought this was gonna be weird"

"You see?" replied Jemima, "I told you there was nothing to worry about!"

"You guys!" yelled Misto as he drew them both into a very tight hug, "You guys are my best friends! I love you so much!"

"Love you too!" they both shouted back and they all ended up in a pile laughing on top of the crate they sat on.

When Tugger returned with another drink he had trouble climbing up as it was quite obvious that he had enjoyed half of the glass already by himself. After a few perilous moments he managed to jump up and taking another sip he offered the rest to the three younger cats that lay there. Gladly they accepted and as the rest of the night went on they found many more drinks made their way inside the four of them.

* * *

The sun was just starting to light up the sky from below the horizon when the Jellicles finally fell out of the club – some of them in the literal sense. Tugger, Misto, Jemima and Victoria supported each other as they walked or rather swayed down the street in a line while behind them trailed the rest of the Jellicles including Skimble and Victor who supported a very drunk Alonzo between them and muttered things as he moaned incomprehensibly.

"He'd never survive up in Scotland" said Skimble in his thick highland twang, "We can certainly drink up there, far more than you English cats!"

Behind them were Demeter and Bomba, both of them having put away quite a lot themselves. Between them they just about managed to keep walking in the same direction as the rest of the Jellicles and still Bomba went on about not having a mate. Demeter found that she wasn't listening as much anymore since Bomba had been going on about the same thing all evening and she was growing tired of hearing it. She felt bad for Bomba but the red queen really needed to shut up. Over the course of the night Bomba had grown progressively more desperate and had thrown herself at many more toms, all of which were to no avail. In her state it was no surprise that none of them were interested and this only made her more upset and frustrated. As she walked with Demeter she continued to moan,

"I just want someone now, Deme. I deserve someone to make me happy; why does no one want me?"

Demeter just mumbled something, Bomba wasn't listening anyway and carried on,

"I want what Tugger and Misto have, I want what Jenny and Skimble have, I want what you and Munk have and it's not fair that I don't! When's he gonna come along, Deme? When my Mr. Right gonna come along and save me?"

"Someday" was all Deme could think of. When Bomba had a drink she became so whiny that it was a struggle for anyone to find the strength to keep listening and Deme was simply concentrating on getting her friend home so she could sleep off her inebriation. That, it seemed, was going to be quite a long walk.

To Misto, however, time seemed to be flying by. He had had such a wonderful night and he was incredibly grateful to Tugger for showing him just how much fun he could have when he let go of his inhibitions. Truly Tugger was the one to make him happy forever and he snuggled against his tom as they walked along sloppily. As they went Victoria started to drag a little bit and Tugger looked across noticing her looking rather ill.

"Are you okay, Vicky?" asked Tugger with a smirk

"I don't feel very well" she drawled slowly

"Had a little bit too much to drink?"

"I-" she began and then planted one hand against her stomach and another firmly against her mouth as her eyes grew wide. Tugger let her go quickly and stood out of the splash zone but fortunately for the rest of them Victoria didn't throw up.

"Are you sure you're alright?" he asked again

"I'm gonna stop talking now" she said gravely as she picked up the pace, "I just wanna get home"

Tugger just chuckled drunkenly as returned his attention back to the tom that seemed to be trying to lean into his fur as they walked along. The tux looked up at him with his big blue eyes and spoke softly,

"I love you. You love me too, right?"

"You know I do, darling."

"Say it for me"

"I love you, Mistoffelees"

The tux smiled, "I was just checking"

Tugger smirked again. "Did you think I might stop loving you?"

"I dunno" said Misto with a yawn, "You promise you'll always love me?"

"Of course, babe."

"And you'll never leave me alone?"

"Never. I love you too much to be gone for too long"

Misto planted a paw against his mate's chest and grinned stupidly, "Good"

The two stayed together with Victoria and Jemima at either side until they all got back to the junkyard. By that time the sun was just starting to peak over the horizon and the morning chorus was just beginning. As they staggered through the junkyard entrance Misto was contributing quite loudly to the birdsong and sang out into the cool morning air with his own version of Candy Man,

"Who can take a sunrise" he shouted somewhat tunefully

"Who can take a sunrise" echoed Jemima and Tugger filling in the response

"Sprinkle it with dew"

"Sprinkle it with dew"

"Cover it in chocolate and a miracle or two? Mistoffelees!"

"Mistoffelees can!"

As they reached the centre of the clearing they all fell down and laughed loudly as they watched the rest of their friends come in too. Skimble and Victor didn't stop to chat and they dragged the fairly limp form of Alonzo to his den straight away. Bomba and Deme slowly made their way back in as well and soon they were with the four that were lying on the ground. Bomba fell down with them and sprawled out across the floor of the junkyard with Deme looking down at her.

"Come on, Bomba, let me get you to your den"

"I'm fine, just leave me here" slurred the red queen

Deme sighed frustratedly, "No, really. I wanna go to bed now but I need to make sure you're alright first"

"Ah it's fine. Tugger'll make sure I'm alright" she said turning towards the maned tom, "Won't you, Tug?"

"What are you on about?" Tugger said as he realised it was he she was talking to.

"I was just saying you're not gonna leave me a second time, are you?"

Demeter pulled her friend back towards her and stared her straight in the eye, "Don't say anything you'll regret tomorrow, dear"

"I won't"

"You know what you're like when you get drunk though, don't you? You do things you wouldn't normally do that get you into trouble"

"Like what?"

"Just things that you know are wrong but you do anyway"

"Oh just go to bed, Deme" said Bomba spitefully. Demeter just straightened up and brushed off Bomba's comment,

"Alright, but don't say I didn't warn you"

"I'll do what I like thank you very much, Mother!" said the red queen as her friend wandered away to her own den. Turning back she focused on the remaining Jellicles on the ground with her.

Victoria was looking even grimmer now and sat cross-legged looking intently at the ground as if she were deep in thought. In reality she was doing her best not to let everyone see the alcohol she drank that night for a second time and gritted her teeth noticeably in her efforts. Jemima could see her friend looking incredibly green and pushed herself up to do something about it. Carefully she lifted Victoria to her paws and started helping her back to her den.

"Come on, V, let's get you to bed"

They made it a few more paces and it was probably a good thing they hadn't quite made it to Victoria's den yet. Without much warning the white queen lurched over and purged a large amount of the booze she had consumed that evening all over the ground in front of her. Jemima leapt away so as not to be covered and stared off in another direction so as not to be made to feel ill as well.

"That is gross!" said Misto from his vantage point on the floor with Tugger

"Someone sure can't handle her slosh!" chuckled Tugger as he looked away as well.

After a few moments the two turned back around and watched as Jemima – more cautiously this time – resumed helping Victoria to her den. After a few long moments the two were out of sight and Misto got up. He reached his paw out to Tugger and spoke,

"Ready for bed?"

"I thought you'd never ask" the big tom said saucily

Misto just giggled like an idiot and plopped his hand against Tugger's cheek as he stood, "No funny business, Mister!"

"Aw, why not?"

"I don't think I can stay awake for much longer"

Tugger yawned, "Yeah, I think I might say the same"

"What about her?" said Misto pointing behind his tom. Tugger looked over his shoulder at the zozzled queen behind him and felt a sense of pity grow within him. He had never really felt all that close to Bomba since she had always simply been an easy lay for him but still she looked quite downtrodden as she lay there in her drunken state. Tugger turned back to Misto and gave him an apologetic smile,

"I think I'd better help her get home. You go and I'll be there in a while"

"You need any help?"

"I don't think she'll go without a fight, might take some brute force to get her to go to bed"

Misto chuckled, "Alright, sweetie-pie"

"Sweetie-pie?"

Misto chuckled more, "Just don't be long. Love you"

"Love you too" said Tugger as he watched his mate stumble back towards the den they shared. He smiled as he observed Misto negotiating the junk as he climbed and let out a sharp laugh when the tux clumsily fell through the doorway into their home.

His smile soon faded as he turned around and laid eyes on the red queen staring back at him. He resisted the urge to sneer as she certainly looked quite rough in the state she was in. Still, he felt quite sorry for her; it must have been hard to be all alone when everyone else seemed to have someone.

"You wanna get to bed then?" asked Tugger as he walked over.

Bomba smiled menacingly, "I knew Misto wasn't shaping up to the job. Had to come back to a queen that knows what she's doing, did ya?"

The maned tom sighed and stood up properly, "For crying out loud, Bomba, that's not what I meant! Will you just butt out of our private life? Misto's perfectly good at what he does and anyway it's none of your business"

"Ah, it is if I make it my business" said the queen snippily

"You're a fucking nightmare! Is it any wonder you and I didn't get together in the end?" said Tugger with annoyance as he tried to pull the queen up. Since he was drunk too it took quite a lot of effort. As his words sunk in Bomba's mean expression suddenly shifted and in a few seconds Tugger saw her become incredibly sad. Her face screwed up and tears soon began to flow down her cheeks as she cried drunkenly. Tugger sighed and felt a little embarrassed, he hadn't meant to touch a sore spot and upset her but in all fairness she was being quite rude. Reluctantly he tried to console her,

"Come on, Bomba, I wasn't trying to be mean"

"It's true though" she said as she choked, "It's no wonder I'm alone, is it?"

Tugger sighed again, "Maybe we should talk about it in the morning. Come on, let's get you to bed"

"But it's true! I'm gonna be alone forever, aren't I?"

"I'm sure you won't be" said Tugger as he started to walk Bomba across the clearing towards her den.

"Oh, what do you know? You left me so how could anyone else want me?"

"Well, you and I never really had a relationship"

"We had something though, didn't we?"

"Well, no, not really"

That just made Bomba cry even more and Tugger felt even more like an arsehole. Clutching at straws he said the first thing that popped into his mind,

"I mean, maybe it wasn't nothing. I always thought you were pretty hot, it's just that I liked Misto more"

"I knew I was never good enough" she said as they started to climb the junk to the entrance of her den

"I'm sure you were good enough, Bomba, I just don't think you and I were meant to be"

"Was it something I did?"

"No, no. You were fine"

"It must be the way I look then"

"No, it's not that"

"Do you think I look good then"

"Good? You look great. Amazing even" said Tugger, the alcohol preventing him from seeing how inappropriate those words might have been.

"Are you still attracted to me, Tug?" the red queen asked as she stood outside her den

Tugger looked her up and down, then across the clearing to his den here his mate was waiting, then back at the queen.

"I'm with Misto. We're happy"

"But are you still attracted to me?"

Tugger felt awkward but he didn't want to upset the queen anymore, "I dunno. Sure"

Bomba smiled a little at that and fell forward onto him. He caught her and struggled to remain upright but still he managed to stop them from falling over.

"You're a good friend, Tug. I wish I could believe you"

"Why wouldn't you believe me?" asked Tugger feeling a genuine pang of sympathy for Bomba – at least, what felt genuine through the alcohol that circulated in his body.

"I just feel so undesirable" she said quietly, "At least when you were using me it felt like someone found me attractive"

Tugger stroked her cheek, "You are attractive, babe. When you find the right tom I bet there'll be no one luckier to have you"

"You're sweet" she said as she wiped the tears away from her eyes. Tugger smiled back at her weakly. Even though she was stinking drunk she still had a glow about her and Tugger started to remember why he used to be attracted to her. Seeing her this vulnerable made Tugger see a whole new side to her though and without realising he slid a paw down to her hip. Absent-mindedly he spoke,

"Let's put you in bed"

Bomba nodded and turned to go back into her den but only startled to stumble around. A moment later she looked back and asked, "Will you help me?"

Tugger wasn't thinking. By now the booze had really set in and he was completely in the moment leaving all other thoughts outside his clear frame of mind. If he had been sober he would have known not to help Bomba to her bed as he knew in his heart that he would find it hard to resist her. He loved Misto dearly but he had always been a slave to his loins and it would take a lot of will power and strength to stop himself from going too far. Unfortunately for him the alcohol he had drunk didn't afford him that strength and in what he perceived as a kind gesture picked Bomba up and helped her into the darkness of her den. Once they were inside he lay her down on her bed and from where she fell she looked up at him and spoke softly,

"Thanks"

"Anytime, Bomba"

"Come sit"

Tugger hesitated and thought about getting back to Misto but for some reason he decided to comply. As he did so the queen carried on,

"I know you love Misto, but for what it's worth I always thought you were amazing"

Tugger snorted, "You still thought I was amazing even after the way I used you?"

"Call me crazy, I still liked you. I still like you now, you know?"

Tugger was quiet for a moment and then turned away,

"I love Misto. I love him a lot. I'm sorry Bomba but I just don't love you"

Bomba sighed, "I know. I always knew but still I hoped that you might one day"

"Well that ship has sailed, Bomba. I'm sorry but you're just not the one for me"

"Yeah, yeah, I know Misto is. He's such a lucky cat"

"I think I'm the lucky one. I don't really compare to how amazing he is"

"I think you do"

Tugger turned to look at her and as he did she leant up and caught him off guard with a kiss. The maned tom startled for a few seconds but then found himself melting into it slightly. Another second passed and then he realised what he was doing and pushed himself off of her in sheer confusion. The two sat looking at each other in silence for a few moments as Tugger tried to think clearly but unfortunately for him his drunkenness clouded his mind and he simply couldn't see sense. Briefly the image of Misto crossed his mind and he felt a tiny pang of guilt in his heart. That disappeared as quickly as it came.

A few more seconds passed with the tom and queen staring at each other before either one moved. What happened next Tugger would always remember as the biggest mistake of his life.

**No, Tugger! Don't do it!**

**Now some shit's going to hit the fan for sure!**

**Thanks for reading, please review if you get the chance. **


	4. The Inevitable Hangover

**Now some bad stuff starts happening, sorry 'bout that.**

**Tugger and Misto wake up to a horrible sickness but not in the same bed.**

**WARNING: Adult themes**

**Love Is No Fairytale**

**Chapter 4**

**The Inevitable Hangover**

He blinked his eyes open as the light from the warm day outside the den began to fall on his face. The big, black and leopard-spotted tom looked out from behind his half-closed eyelids and continued to blink as he tried to gain some focus. The world seemed to be spinning a little bit and the first thing he could tell as he awoke was that everything was a little out of perspective. Laying still for a few minutes his double vision eventually settled into a clearer view and he started to look around without moving his body. He narrowed his eyebrows slightly when he found that the surroundings of the den he shared with his mate were not there and in their place were things he knew certainly didn't belong to Misto or himself. Taking a long time to figure it out it eventually dawned on Tugger that he was not in his den and the question that came after this was 'How did he get there?'

Without giving it too much thought Tugger pushed himself up from the bed he was lying on – a bed that certainly didn't smell of Misto or himself – and swung his legs around violently so he was sitting on the edge of it. Such a move was probably not too smart given the circumstances and almost instantly the most awful feeling hit Tugger like a ton of bricks. The big tom lurched over clutching his head when it started to feel like someone was hitting him from inside his skull with a lead pipe. The deep, throbbing pain that pounded in his head and started to radiate down his neck was truly unbearable and he moaned pathetically as he screwed his eyes closed in discontent. Unmercifully it was then the turn of his stomach to protest and within seconds Tugger felt an incredibly unpleasant feeling in his guts. He felt so unbelievably sick he couldn't bear to move anymore and so he just sat there wondering why he was feeling so awful.

A few more mind-numbingly uncomfortable minutes passed before flashes of the previous night started to manifest in his brain and suddenly things didn't seem so unclear. Tugger sighed heavily – not too heavily though so as not to aggravate his aching body any more than he needed to – and began to lift his head to take another look at the den he was sitting in. Blinking his eyes again as he attempted to adjust to the piercing light as he moved his head slowly from side to side to take a look around. As things became clearer he realised he was in Bomba's den.

The next question after this that popped into his mind was 'Why am I in here with her?' and the second, more pressing question was 'Where's Misto?"

Turning around even more he angled his head to look behind him and sure enough he laid eyes on the owner of the den lying next to him on the bed he sat on. Tugger felt a sneer spread across his lips as he looked down at the red queen; she looked very rough as she slept and it didn't take Tugger long to figure out the reason. She was breathing very heavily and her fur was mashed up and out of place displaying the clear signs of the morning after a heavy night. What was the strangest about her though was not her appearance but her scent and Tugger furrowed his brow as he wondered why she smelt so strongly of him. He wasn't allowed too long to think about this as his head and stomach started to do battle over which one was going to give him more grief and he quickly went back to feeling sorry for himself. Still he looked on at her and as he did he remembered little snippets of picking her up and dragging her back into her den. She had been so drunk and the job had been made all the more difficult due to him being in a similar state. Tugger closed his eyes and gently shook his head from side to side as he analysed his behaviour from the very few memories he had of the night prior to this moment but then let a little smirk appear. This certainly seemed in character for him and he praised himself internally for managing to revisit his old ways and corrupt his straight-shooting little mate for a few hours. Misto had seemed quite happy once he started to enjoy himself and that was all Tugger had wanted. The big tom would have continued to smile had it not been for the remaining question that burned in his thumping head: 'Why the hell was he with Bomba?' Refocusing on her he tried to remember anything about the last moments of his night - since obviously he had fallen asleep there – but alas, the alcohol seemed to have erased his memory. Shrugging, he decided he must have just collapsed next to her as soon as he put her to bed and felt a little guilty that he hadn't managed to make it back to Misto. He hoped his tux hadn't been waiting up for him for long and he decided to go back to his den and apologise for not being there during the night. That decision, it seemed, was easier said than done though and Tugger took a few moments to think about how he was going to do it.

Planting his paws firmly on the bed he tried to ignore his aching muscles as he pushed down hard and lifted his body off of it. It seemed his efforts were going well until he felt a tremor radiate through him and he fell back down onto the soft cushions. The Maine Coon felt his stomach swirl as he fell back down and clutched at his abdomen until the dizzying sick feeling became slightly more bearable. Taking a few more moments to breathe he decided to do this quickly and without hesitating lunged upwards and somehow managed to balance on his feet – albeit swaying from side to side until he found his centre. Slowly, he began to put one foot in front of the other and looking straight ahead he made for the den's entrance. As he pulled himself out into the sunshine he squinted as the brightness stabbed at his tender mind and did his best to navigate his way down the junk. When he stumbled down onto the ground he stopped for a few seconds to take a breather and then attempted to resume the journey back to his home.

Each step he took was torturous on his body and with each thump of his alcohol soaked brain he quickly came to the decision that this hangover was one of the worst ones he had ever had. Sure, he'd had many hangovers before but this one really ranked up there in the top five. Only a few times before had he felt this rotten after a night out and he rarely experienced such after-effects that literally made him want to die. He could deal with a headache, a tender stomach or a sore set of muscles but when they all came at once and to this magnitude he felt as if he were going down for the last time.

From his lookout point atop the big tyre across from Tugger, Munkustrap followed his brother with his eyes as he stumbled and lurched across the clearing. He debated briefly whether or not to go over and help but then decided just to sit back and enjoy watching him handle the symptoms of his self-inflicted illness.

"Looking good, Tug!" he called out to the maned tom

Tugger gripped his head as the words entered his ringing ears, "Please stop talking!" he groaned as the words bounced around his skull and aggravated his headache.

"What's the matter? Little too much to drink last night?" chuckled Munk

"Shut up! Please, shut up!" he whined

Munk continued to laugh as Tugger shamefully continued his walk of shame in the direction of his den. Climbing the junk up to it's entrance was quite painful as it involved him applying a certain amount of energy through the parts of his body that begged not to be used for what seemed like the next thousand years. Somehow, however, Tugger made his way up and in a few moments he was staring into the welcoming gloom if his den. He took in a deep breath through his nose and smiled weakly when he detected the welcoming scent of his mate mixing with his own radiating from within and he gladly stepped inside.

* * *

Earlier that morning Misto had awoken to the deafening ringing sound of birds chirping outside his den. What was strange about the sound he usually loved so much was how it now seemed like daggers against his eardrums and he had attempted to bury his head under as many pillows as he could hold. It was then that the lightning pain established itself in his head and he had started to writhe around where he lay as he attempted to deal with the discomfort. Where was the pain coming from and why was he feeling so sick as well? He had had such a great time last night – not that he remembered much of it now come to think of it – so why would he wake up feeling so terrible? Misto had never had a hangover before so all of these strange feelings were quite new to him; new and quite scary. As the small tom tried to look around his den he felt increasingly more ill and as he sat up he felt an incredibly uncomfortable twinge in his stomach. As he pushed himself up that uncomfortable feeling started to swirl and move upwards and he found he had to dash forward to grab the nearest receptacle – which happened to be an old discarded teacup – and purge into it. The whole process was quite traumatic for Misto and he felt tears well up in his eyes as he wondered why on earth he felt so rough. Was he dying? It sure felt like it. It must have been those awful tasting drinks; he should have known they were no good and would give him this horrible disease he now had. After a few moments with his head inside the teacup he straightened himself up despite protest from his sore body and decided to find Jenny so she could give him emergency treatment.

The young tux very nearly made it to the entrance of the den when he felt a shadow fall across the doorway. He looked up to see a large, dark shape looming over him and in his confusion jumped back in fright.

"Hi, Misto" came Tugger's voice and as the shape moved closer Misto saw it was his mate. Puzzling for a second he looked around and noticed that Tugger had not been where he thought he was and was curious as to where he had been. Tugger always woke up after him and he loved waking up lying in his mate's arms until he came back to life as well. These thoughts, however, were pushed aside when Misto felt another griping pain in his stomach and spun his dizzy head around to locate his teacup lest he need to use it again.

"Are you alright?" croaked Tugger as he stepped into the den with his eyes squinted and his paw against his forehead.

"No, I'm not" moaned Misto pitifully, "I think there's something really wrong with me"

"Like what?" asked Tugger as he did his best to listen through the thumping in his head.

"I don't know. My head feels like it's going to explode, my tummy's doing somersaults and I feel like I'm going to fall apart. I'm dying, Tugger!"

Tugger would have smiled at how cute it was that Misto called his stomach his tummy and that he was so confused over what he was feeling but he was in no state to be joyful right now. Stepping towards him he put his paw on the tux's shoulder making him look up with his big blue eyes – eyes which now were contrasted with a distinctive pink.

"You're not dying" said Tugger as gently as he could, "It's just a hangover. Don't you remember what you did last night?"

Misto thought for a second, "No. Well, I remember going out"

"Do you remember how much you drank?"

"Not really"

"Well it was a lot. And I mean a LOT. What you're feeling now is called a hangover and it's what you get the morning after you drink that much. It doesn't mean you'll die but you're gonna feel awful for probably the entire day"

Once again Misto was quiet and looked down in pained thought before looking back up again, "Are you sure?"

"Positive. I'm no stranger to it"

"And you still drink even though this happens?" asked Misto as Tugger turned and made his way to lie down on the bed.

"Yep"

"Why?"

"Cos it's fun, isn't it?"

"This isn't fun. I'm never drinking again" said Misto as he straightened up a little and hobbled over to join his mate. Those words drew a little titter from Tugger and he opened his arms for Misto to climb into.

"You had fun last night, you said so yourself"

"I don't really remember having fun"

"You did, babe. I promise you did"

Misto didn't respond to that and snuggled down into Tugger's mane before thinking of something else to say,

"Did you wake up before me?"

Tugger opened his eyes a second and wondered what he was going to tell him. He decided what he thought he'd done wasn't that bad so didn't think much of it,

"I fell asleep at Bomba's when I was trying to take her home. I don't really remember much else"

"That doesn't sound like you. Did she mind?"

"She was pretty out of it. I think I must have just fallen aslee-" Tugger stopped mid-sentence when a flash of memory from the previous evening screamed into his mind. His eyes flew wide open this time and he flinched as he played the speck of memory through. The image was of him mashing his mouth against Bomba's heatedly and laying her down on her bed. Tugger shook his head slightly in disbelief at what he remembered but as he tried to find any other explanation more memory made itself known. He suddenly remembered everything and his mouth dropped open as he saw himself grabbing Bomba and entering her passionately while she moaned and writhed beneath him. He remembered how they had touched and rubbed against each other in their drunken haze and then as if things couldn't get any worse he remembered climaxing and falling down on top of her while they were still together.

"Ow! Tugger! Let go!" said Misto struggling against the bigger toms arms as they tightened around him. "What's wrong with you?"

Tugger was shocked and simply couldn't hear anything but his own thoughts. How could he have done it? Did he actually do it? Did he actually have sex with Bomba? Surely that was impossible! He loved Misto so dearly, he was the one that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with so he simply couldn't have had sex with Bomba knowing that. The maned tom tried to convince himself otherwise and find any other memory that would relieve his worry but it was no use: What he saw in his mind had definitely happened.

Misto began to pull at Tugger's arms as he locked him in a death grip and the tux wriggled around to try to get the bigger tom to release him. "Tugger! Let me go! You're hurting me!"

Still Tugger was stuck in shock. He couldn't believe that he had screwed Bomba. Was he that much of an idiot that he'd just thrown caution to the wind and jumped on top of her? Sure, they'd mated in the past but that was before he'd fallen in love with someone else. He was mated to Misto and that was all he ever wanted and at that moment he couldn't think of ever having sex with anyone but him ever again. Yet, there it was. It was done and he couldn't take it back. Right on cue a crushing, soul-destroying feeling of guilt flooded his mind and blotted out the rough feelings of his hangover. This was far bigger than that and he ripped his paws from around Misto and plastered them against his face in a feeling of deep regret and shame while letting out a low groan. This was absolutely the worst thing he had ever done; how would Misto ever forgive him for doing this?

He then took his paws away and looked at his mate who was now sitting up and rubbing his arms while looking back at him with annoyed confusion. How was he going to tell Misto what he'd done? It would destroy him; he couldn't possible do that to the young tux, could he?

As the seconds ticked by Tugger felt worse and worse about what he'd done and his reaction only made Misto all the more confused. Gently, he tried to speak to his mate,

"Tugger, what's wrong? Are you alright?"

Tugger's expression changed from that of shame to one of deep repentance and he looked as if he was going to cry making Misto all the more worried.

"Please, Tug, tell me what's wrong"

The maned tom was stuck; what was he supposed to tell Misto? The two remained looking at each other for a long without saying anything. Tugger knew there was no way to take back what he'd done and wondered how he could have been so stupid. He loved Misto so much so how could ever have managed to have sex with anyone but him?

Swallowing hard he took in a deep breath and looked his fearful mate in the eyes. He needed to say something but there were no words to express just how dreadful he felt and how sorry he was.

**Tugger, you bastard! How could you do that to Misto? You had it so good! Why did you have to ruin it?**

**Thanks for reading, next chapter will be soon. Please review.**


	5. Secrets And Lies

**MISTO'S A HOMO! Sorry, just felt like yelling that for some reason, no idea why. Lol.**

**Sorry it took me nearly a week to do this one. I've been hella busy with a show I'm doing at the moment and I've barely had time to write everything in my head down. Don't you just hate when you've got loads of good story in your mind but you're not where you need to be to write it down? **

**Anyway, Tugger tries to find a way out of his predicament.**

**Love Is No Fairytale**

**Chapter 5**

**Secrets And Lies**

"Tugger?"

The word echoed around in his mind as he stared at the cat before him feeling as if an enormous black pit had just opened up inside his body and that every shred of his very existence was falling into it. As the seconds ticked by the mounting feeling of guilt and shame was becoming truly soul destroying and he simply couldn't move due to the sheer shock of it all.

"Tugger?"

How could he have been so stupid that he would have sex with someone else? How can he not have remembered that he was mated? Furthermore how could he not remember how much he loved Mistoffelees? Even if he had wanted to do it without being drunk surely he could have remembered that he loved Misto more, couldn't he?

"Tugger? What's wrong?"

But that was just it, wasn't it? He'd allowed himself to go back to his old ways just for one night and the worst thing about it was that he knew how reckless he could be when he had a drink yet he went ahead with it anyway. He'd practically grown up being that carefree and it was the way he had lived his life up until he'd fallen in love with Misto. When that happened he had changed; he found he loved Misto more than he did his carefree lifestyle and he'd made the decision to devote himself to him and not his social life. He had been happy to do this, after all Misto was worth it. Did that ever cross his mind when he was screwing Bomba though? No, because he was stupid! That was the reason: he had drunken himself into a complete stupor and forgotten that his life was perfect with Misto. He loathed himself down to his very core for doing what he'd done and for once in his life he realised just how much of an impact his actions could have. As well as that he knew that this time he actually cared about the outcome of those actions and just how terrible life could become after this. Misto would be crushed. He would probably break up with Tugger for good and might even leave the junkyard. What if he never saw his beautiful little tux again after this? How could he bear to go on?

"Rum Tum Tugger! Will you snap out of it!" came a shrill, squawking voice that visibly shook the maned tom. Taking a second to observe his surroundings he was confronted with the sight of a motherly-looking tabby queen looking down at him with a very worried looking Misto behind her. When had she come in? He hadn't noticed a thing. Had he been gawking for so long that he had missed her stopping by? Again the voice came,

"For Heaviside's sake, boy, say something!" commanded the queen.

Tugger looked up at her, "Where did you come from, Jenny?" he whispered

"Mistoffelees came and got me; seems like you scared the poor thing half to death over whatever it was that sent you like that"

"Like what?"

"Staring into thin air, eyes locked on something but not focused, slack jaw, looking dumfounded really. What on earth's the matter with you, dear?"

"I…" was all Tugger said before looking behind her again and catching a glimpse of his worried mate's face. He looked so confused and concerned at the same time; he really did care about him. Again the crushing feeling returned to him and he felt tears well up behind his eyes due to feeling so rotten. He felt like a completely worthless piece of dirt and he knew in his heart that he had potentially ruined the greatest thing that had ever happened to him. He had actually found love – something he never understood until Misto – and his life had been completed; now the perfect life he had was teetering on the edge of oblivion and it seemed like there was nothing he could do to stop it from falling.

"Tugger?" pleaded Misto quietly as he slowly stepped around Jenny and bent down to look him in the eye, "Tell me what's wrong. Please, maybe I can help"

Tugger just looked back at him and used every last ounce of his strength not to break down and beg for forgiveness. That's what he wanted to do, he wanted so badly to show Misto how sorry he was but that would mean having to tell him what he'd done first. How could he do that? He held all of Misto's happiness and trust in his paw so how could he possibly destroy it? He loved his mate so much, he didn't want to upset him or do anything that might hurt him and that included this. Tugger racked his brain for any way out of the situation but after a few moments of gazing intently at Misto he found that all he could think of was his shame and regret.

"Misto," he began meekly as he wondered what he was going to say next. It was then that he had a thought: What if he talked to Bomba about this? Maybe they could find a way to fix it? He knew it was an awful idea but he didn't really have any other choice. Sharply he shook his head and pushed himself up.

"…I'll be right back. Sorry" he said as he barged past him. He was just approaching the doorway to the den when he paused and looked back around. He noticed Misto had a pleading look in his eye and it seemed to Tugger that if he weren't so confused he'd probably be quite upset from the worry he so obviously possessed. Biting his lip for a moment Tugger did what he thought was best and hurried back over to him. Without warning he yanked Misto into the fiercest embrace he could manage and buried his face into the smaller tom's soft, black neck fur. Misto startled slightly at the sudden action but then hugged him back cautiously. If anything he was now even more confused by whatever it was that was going on.

"I love you, Misto. I love you so much" said Tugger as he nuzzled him, "Please believe me! I'd do anything for you, darling, you are my reason for living"

Misto flicked his eyes to Jenny who looked just as riddled as him over the sudden, fierce display of affection. He then returned his focus to Tugger,

"I know you love me, I love you too"

With that Tugger quickly took off with his paw close to his face. It seemed to Misto as if Tugger was shielding his eyes; was he crying? The black and white tom thought about following him for a moment but then remembered or rather felt how bad his hangover was. Clutching his stomach again he begrudgingly turned back to Jenny and gave her the best puppy dog eyes he could manage – regardless of how ironic the expression is.

"Jenny?"

"Yes, dear?"

"You know how we all went out last night?"

"Yes" she said in a more judgemental tone

"I don't feel so good now"

"Oh deary me…" said the motherly queen before guiding him back to his bed and beginning a mind-numbingly long and arduous lecture on the dangers of alcohol and why he should never have even tried it. If the awful hangover wasn't enough to make him never want to drink again then Misto knew the scolding he was receiving would be.

* * *

Tugger sprung from the den and immediately lost his footing on the junk below him. Without time to turn his body he fell down the junk and landed on the ground in a clatter making a huge racket that echoed around the clearing. He groaned loudly shortly after the impact and pushed himself up displaying immense strain and anguish. Munk noticed all of this from atop the big tyre and instantly sprung up when Tugger seemed to hurt himself. The silver tabby had always thought of his brother as a bit of a moron but still he was a Jellicle and as protector he was sworn to look out for them regardless of what feelings he had. Besides, Tugger was his brother and there was a limit to how much he enjoyed watching him hurt himself. Arriving at the maned tom's side just as he was clambering back to his feet the silver tabby helped him the rest of the way and placed his paws on his shoulders to help him gain balance.

"Are you alright, Tug? That was quite a fall"

Tugger didn't respond, he just looked away and then tried to take off with a crazed but deeply sad look in his eye. Munk was worried by this and grabbed him before he got too far away.

"Really, Tug, what's the matter? You look awful"

"Just let me go!" shouted the Maine Coon and shook his brother off. For a split second Munk caught his eye and saw there was something seriously wrong that was making him behave this way. Tugger usually treated him with a general apathy and contempt but now he was different; he was frantic and it seemed as if he was actually scared. This confused Munk as he'd never really known Tugger to be scared; vain, shallow, and rude for sure but never scared.

As Tugger tried to leave again Munk grabbed him a second time,

"What's wrong with you? Tell me!"

"Get lost, Munk!" Tugger shouted before gripping his brother's paw and giving him an almighty shove. Munk staggered back and nearly lost his balance but turned in just enough time to keep standing. Turning his head back around he found Tugger had already started running away and then puzzled as he watched him climb up the junk and disappear from sight as he went back into Bomba's den. Munk was left alone in the clearing with plenty of questions but no answers. What on earth was wrong with Tugger?

With a sigh the silver tabby returned to his post only this time keeping an eye for any sign of movement at the red queen's doorway.

* * *

Bomba's sleep had been rough. She hadn't awoken at all in the night since she had been rendered completely unconscious from drenching her body in booze the previous evening and had been virtually un-wakeable up until now. It was probably best for her that she hadn't regained any kind of contact with the world yet as she would soon find out her body's response to the amount of alcohol she had ingested was – to put it lightly – negative. As she lay on her bed with her mouth hanging open and her limbs sprawled akimbo she breathed heavily and with a rough, rocky sound which would make one envisage her throat as sandpaper. It wasn't a snore but it was certainly a sound which signified she was in no fit state to wake up that day. Overall though, above the as of yet silent hangover, she was quite peaceful and any sane cat would know to let her come back to life in her own time. Tugger at that moment was not sane. There was so much going on in his head as he barged into her den that any clear or useful thought was without a doubt left outside. He was on a reckless mission to find any kind of escape to the shame and resentment he felt inside and for some strange reason he was sure Bomba would provide him with some shining beacon of a solution. That is, he didn't really have any other idea of what to do and she seemed like the only road left open to him that might afford even the slightest chance of an escape.

Taking a second to allow his eyes to adjust to the change in light he locked his vision onto the sleeping form of his former lover. Without any sense of compassion or care he stomped over and threw his paws onto her. Savagely he bounced and shook her up and down on the bed while shouting,

"Wake up! Wake up! Wake up!"

It took a good few moments of doing this before the red queen started to react to the violent actions and showing strong objection to them she began to whine and shift uncomfortably as Tugger ceased his mad shaking. As she blinked in the shady light of her den she instantly felt the booming headache and queasy stomach that had been waiting to take her all night long and she hunched and rolled over on the bed without taking into account she was not alone. Tugger just watched and when he realised he had been ignored he became angry.

"Everlasting Cat, Bomba! Get the hell up right now and look at me!"

Yawning croakily Bomba opened her eyes and looked up at the dark shadow of Tugger looming over her,

"Go away, Tug! I feel like crap," she moaned as forcefully as she could

"You're gonna feel even worse if you don't do as I say and get up right now!"

"We'll talk later, you stupid arse! Get out and leave me alone!"

"No! We have to talk about this now!"

Bomba suddenly became very grouchy and looked up with fire brewing in her eyes,

"What the hell is so important that you need to talk about right this second? What could you possibly have going on in your perfect little life that needs my undivided attention despite how unwell I feel?"

Her expression softened a little when she realised that behind Tugger's anger and forwardness was a very prominent and urgent desperation. Or was it just plain sadness? She couldn't quite tell. Still, she tried to keep up her angry expression until he came back at her with an answer. The two waited in silence for a few moments before Tugger managed to speak,

"How could you let it happen?"

Bomba just closed her eyes and sighed; she was in no mood for silly questions.

"How could I let what happen?" she said tiredly

The maned tom clenched his fists at his sides as he grew more and more desperate,

"What we did. Don't you remember?"

"Remember what?"

"Last night"

The red queen lay back down with her eyes still closed and placed her paw on her forehead, "It feels like you dragged us to one of your stupid old hangouts"

"I mean after that," growled Tugger baring his teeth a little

"I don't remember anything from last night, and what's got you in such a bother?"

"Don't you remember anything that went on last night? Not a single damn thing?"

Bomba pushed herself up again and glared at him, "No, I bloody don't! I know you dragged us out and we drank a lot but that's all I can think of that probably happened so will you please just get out and leave me alone!"

Tugger huffed angrily, "Fine!" He turned on his heels and started to storm towards the door with Bomba watching from behind. She was glad he was going but couldn't help but feel bad over the definite crack she heard in his last word. Something was really up with him and she didn't feel right leaving him to deal with his troubles alone despite how much of an arse he was being towards her. With a frustrated and reluctant groan she called out to him,

"Tugger, wait." She swung her legs around and stood up. She wobbled for a few seconds but then managed to steady herself and walk over to him. He had stopped at her call but still had his back to her as the red queen came up next to him to see his troubled face.

"Okay, I'm listening. What's wrong?"

The maned tom just closed his eyes and gently shook his head from side to side for a few seconds before bringing his paws up to his face, grimacing for a moment and then speaking,

"I just don't know how to say it. I can't believe you don't remember"

"Remember what, Tug?"

"What happened last night?"

"Do you want to sit down?"

Tugger looked at her, then over at the bed and widened his eyes, "No. Not there. Never"

Bomba was confused but didn't really care as she asked, "Why not?"

"Do you really not remember?"

"No. Mind if I sit down?"

Tugger just shrugged and looked away leaving Bomba to return to the bed and massage her temples gently.

"Okay, Tug, start at the beginning. What exactly is wrong and how does it involve me if at all?"

"I wouldn't be here if it didn't"

"Okay, good, now carry on"

Tugger took a deep breath, "When we came back to the junkyard you were really drunk"

"Sounds about right" said Bomba as she pinched the bridge of her nose

"You needed someone to help you get back here but everyone else was gone. I dragged you in and put you to bed"

"Well, cheers for that"

"You were being really rude about me and Misto"

"Rude?"

"I think so. Something about him not being good enough in bed and that you still wanted me or some bollocks"

The red queen looked up at him embarrassedly, "Oh…sorry, was I that bad?"

"Terrible"

"Ah…I'm really sorry if I offended you. I guess it must have been some feelings leftover from whenever it was. You know I think you and Misto are great together, right?"

"Just shut up!" shouted Tugger making Bomba startle. Had she said something she oughtn't? All she wanted to do was be pleasant so why had he reacted to her compliment like that?

"What?"

"Don't talk about me and Misto!"

"Okay, but wh-"

"Let me finish! After I put you in bed I told you off and you got really upset"

Bomba stayed silent.

"Do you remember what happened then?"

The queen was getting irritated again, "Please just tell me"

Once again Tugger became hot and bothered and stormed over to the wall punching the junk that composed it while releasing a series of angry and very upset-sounding grunts. A moment later he turned and headed for the door again,

"Just forget it, Bomba! Obviously you and me doing what we did and ruining my life with Misto isn't important to you! At least now I know just how much you care!"

Bomba was confused. 'Ruining his life with Misto', what did that mean? What had they done that could do that? They hadn't done anything at all that she knew of so why was he so upset?

As she watched him get close to the door she tried to think back just a few hours and just before he left it hit her like a wrecking ball.

"Tugger!" she yelped as she suddenly became incredibly shocked and reached her paw out towards him. The maned tom turned to look at her and instantly her expression was enough to tell him that she had remembered their accident.

"Do you…?" he whispered

"Everlasting…we can't have"

* * *

Misto sat alone in his den nursing a cup of tea Jenny had brought him earlier. His head felt numb but he couldn't decide whether it was from his illness or the speech Jenny had given him about drinking. She had certainly been thorough and he had stopped listening to her very shortly after she had begun. He was in no mood to be lectured to today but he was polite and he'd never ask a queen such as her to leave because she was boring him senseless. Eventually she had taken pity on him and brought him the tea he was now sipping before leaving him to deal with the sickness on his own. As he sat his mind kept churning over the way Tugger had behaved not too long ago. He had looked so frightened but also distraught and Misto had no idea as to the reason. Had he done something to make Tugger react like that? Had he said something? The black and white tom tried to think through everything he had done right up until that point but of course he came up with nothing out of the ordinary. So what was it that Tugger was so flustered about? Furthermore, where had he gone? Misto looked towards the door half expecting to see Tugger return right at that very moment but sure enough he wasn't there. Turning his head back to the tea he was stirring slowly with a spoon he considered the possibility that he had done something the previous night to offend or otherwise unnerve his mate. He had no memory of what happened after his first couple of drinks so he thought about how likely it might be that something he had done had made Tugger want some space for a while. Sighing, he lifted the cup to his mouth and took another sip. As he drank he thought about how he considered himself to have really been an inconvenience to Tugger in the past; after all it wasn't that long ago that he had been the subject of almost the entire tribe's hatred and Tugger could so easily have just left him to deal with it on his own. But he hadn't: he'd stuck with him and even when he'd run away and hurt himself so badly the maned tom had carried him home and made the Jellicles see he was no threat to them.

'_Tugger must really love me for doing all that'_ thought Misto as he placed the cup back down. For a long while he sat there I silence blaming himself more and more for Tugger's sudden disappearance. Why did he always have to be a problem for the Coon?

* * *

Tugger glared at Bomba who continued to look back at him in shock. They had been that way for a while now and the air was growing thicker and thicker with awkwardness. The red queen didn't know what to think as she tried to take in the reality of the situation and Tugger was filled with too much shame to fabricate any words to break the silence. Eventually Bomba gathered some thought and took in a slow, heavy breath,

"…How?" she breathed as she looked at him. Tugger closed his eyes and looked down in disgrace.

"We were drunk. We weren't thinking"

"Who started it?"

"I don't know, I don't remember. All I know is that we did it. We did it and we can't take it back," said Tugger choking on the last few words. Tears began to gather in his eyes and he began to sniff as the emotion begged to be released from inside. "I can't believe this happened, I'm such an idiot! I love Misto so much and I can't believe I did this to him! He's the best thing that's ever happened to me and now I've gone and ruined everything!" He stopped there and began to sob into the back of his paw. Bomba watched him with her heart practically breaking over the sight. She had never known The Rum Tum Tugger to be any deeper than what was on the surface and it was quite amazing to actually see him crying over something that was obviously so important to him. Feeling sympathetic, she pushed herself up and slowly walked over to the distraught tom placing a paw on his arm when she got close enough. Tugger looked up at her through red, teary eyes and silently begged her for some kind of answer. The sight nearly tipped Bomba over the edge as well since she felt so helpless but also incredibly guilty. After a moment she managed to speak,

"I'm sorry, Tugger. I'm sorry I let it happen"

That seemed to console him a little bit so she carried on,

"I'm not saying I'm totally to blame but whatever happened I didn't stop it and for that I'm really, really sorry"

"I know" sniffed Tugger, "it was probably both our faults; but there's no way to take it back"

"No…" she said quietly. The two stood there for a moment feeling absolutely wretched before Bomba spoke again, "Does he know?"

Tugger shook his head slowly, "Not yet. I couldn't bear to tell him, it would break his heart"

"Then don't," she said more firmly. Tugger looked up at her in confusion,

"What?"

"I don't want to be the reason you two break up. You're perfect together and no matter how I feel in the end you're right for each other."

"What are you saying?"

She sighed heavily, "I'm saying what we did was an accident. A horrible accident. You and me were never going anywhere but you and Misto, well, that's a match made in Heaviside. You two need to be together so he mustn't know"

"You mean…lie?" said Tugger reservedly

"Just don't tell him. Last night never happened, you fell asleep here and woke up in the morning: that's all"

Tugger sniffed again, "I don't know if I can keep this from him. It feels so wrong"

Bomba squeezed his shoulder, "You have to try; you don't want to risk losing him over this. Let's just put it behind us and never speak about it ever again. It never happened, right?"

Tugger stood there looking incredibly conflicted. Could he really keep what he had done from Misto? How could he live with him knowing he did something to betray him so badly? On the other paw, how could Misto begin to handle knowing? They're relationship would never be the same; at least this way all of what happened could be eventually forgotten and life would go back to normal.

Taking a deep breath Tugger looked up and spoke more firmly, "Alright. It never happened."

Bomba gave him a weak smile, "Okay"

Tugger looked back at her but didn't reply so she just hugged him, "I really hope you and Misto will always be happy. I'm sorry for ever getting in your way"

Tugger didn't know what to do so he just stood there feeling uneasy. A moment later she stepped back and mirrored his expression. Gazing at each other for a few moments Tugger eventually gave her a tiny nod, turned and walked out leaving her alone in her den.

Bomba looked at the doorway for a few moments feeling now that she and Tugger were well and truly over. For some reason she didn't mind as much as she thought she might have done; at least she was helping another – or two in this case – be with the one they truly loved.

Laying back down she drifted off to sleep again unaware that the hangover wasn't the only thing going on inside her body.

* * *

As Tugger plodded across the clearing with his eyes to the ground he tried to come to terms with the horrible mess he felt inside him. It was an excruciating mixture of guilt, shame, regret, sadness and worthlessness but it was different than before. Now it was because of the decision to keep Misto from knowing what he'd done with Bomba and for that he felt like dirt. To have betrayed Misto's trust and love so gravely was like a dagger through him and even though his mate wouldn't know any of it, he would and he was going to have to live with that guilt forever. He didn't feel right having had sex with somebody else behind Misto's back and not confessing to him but he was too afraid of losing the most important cat in his life to actually go through with it. With a heavy heart he resigned to the secrecy and began to climb the junk in front of his den. As he entered his home he did his best to put on a neutral expression and appear fine for his mate who he found sitting and staring into an empty cup. The black and white tom looked up when he noticed a shadow fall across the doorway and stood when he found it was Tugger. The two just looked at each other for a moment before Misto snapped himself out of it and began to walk over.

"Hey, Tug. Are you alright now?"

Tugger gritted his teeth inside his mouth as he looked into his perfect mate's big, blue eyes and had to will himself not to fall apart again. Taking in a sharp breath he feigned a smile and pulled the tux into a firm but noticeably insincere hug. Misto stood in his mate's arms glad to be close but curious as to the strange embrace and decided to ask him again,

"What's up, Tugger? You don't seem like yourself"

Tugger looked down at him and opened his mouth to speak,

"I'm fine now, really. I was just worried about…uh…Alonzo. He was really off his face last night and I was worried he might be dead…or something"

Misto raised an eyebrow at the strange response and decided to press further,

"Are you sure that's the reason? You seemed awfully disturbed earlier"

"Well, it wasn't just Alonzo. I checked Bomba too but she's fine. Everything's fine now, I promise"

"There's nothing else? Nothing else at all that's got you on edge?"

Tugger had to fight against his conscience not to tell all right there and with a gulp he forced himself to say, "Nothing"

"Did I do anything to make you unhappy?"

Tugger's eyes widened slightly and it felt as if his heart had skipped a beat when Misto said that.

"Of course not; how could you think that?"

"I don't really remember anything," the tux said shyly, "I just want you to know that if I did anything to upset you then I'm sorry"

"Of course you didn't, you could never do anything to upset me"

Misto smiled kindly at that. If Tugger said everything was fine then it must be; after all he knew his mate certainly wouldn't lie to him. What's more he was in the clear over having done anything wrong. Standing up as tall as he could he pressed his lips to the maned tom's briefly before resting his head in the crook of his neck.

"Okay. Hey, you wanna know something?"

"Sure"

"I love you"

Tugger closed his eyes to hide his shame; keeping this secret was going to eat away at him but what other choice did he have? Pulling his mate close and nuzzling him he told him the truth for the first time that day,

"I love you too. I love you more than anything else in the world"

They stood together for a while in that position. One happy, one deeply ashamed.

**Poor little Misto blaming himself for Tugger's edginess, and now Tugger's going to keep what he did a secret? What a wanker! **

**Thanks for reading. Fair warning: things are going to go wrong now. Really wrong! Even so, please review. x**


	6. Searching For A Happier Feeling

**You know, in hindsight maybe I should have left out a certain line from the last chapter. Seems like I've given the game away on that before I've even written it. Never mind though, that's not really the main focus of the story so it doesn't matter if you've already guessed what's going to happen. I've got a big ol' mess of crap to put them all through that I haven't even alluded to yet so in the words of Lucius Malfoy from A Very Potter Sequel, "It's not over yet!"**

**Tugger and Bomba feel bad about what they've done**

**Love Is No Fairytale**

**Chapter 6**

**Searching For A Happier Feeling**

As the day went on Misto still found he was put on edge by the way Tugger behaved around him. The maned tom kept very close by but was vague and continued to look upset behind his eyes despite whatever façade he tried to put on. The young tux wanted to believe him when he said everything was fine and for the first hour or so he had. By now it was well into the afternoon and sure enough he grew curious as to the reason why his mate didn't seem the full ticket. He thought about asking him but he decided he really didn't want to nag.

As day started to turn into night the feeling that he ought to again ask the maned tom whether or not he was alright grew even stronger. Tugger had never really been that deep a cat so it was surprising to Misto that now he seemed to display some kind of emotional layering. To think that Tugger might be so troubled that he would actually bottle up his feelings and put on a brave face seemed very out of place for him and Misto started to wonder how well he really knew his mate. On the one paw they had been friends long before they had become mates and as such had come to know each other rather well but on the other paw it always seemed that Tugger had been a better friend with some of the other Jellicles. In the short time they'd been dating and then mated they had learnt more about each other and now knew one another intimately; Misto had thought they couldn't get much closer. Now, however, Tugger was acting strangely and as if he was keeping something from him; did that mean he didn't know his mate as well as he thought he did?

It took a long time for Misto to fall asleep that night. He had lay in Tugger's arms for what seemed like hours as he tried to drift off but there were things stopping him from doing so. One was the confusion mixed with worry that circulated in his troubled mind and another were the remnants of the hangover which by now was mercifully nowhere near as bad as it had been when he'd woken up. The major factor was how tightly Tugger held him. The Maine Coon's arms constricted around his body and held him very stiffly making him feel quite uncomfortable. It was not the normal way Tugger held him by any means since he usually had a way of making Misto feel like he was in Heaviside whenever he held him. That feeling was not present that night, he simply held Misto too firmly and it felt as if he were afraid that if he didn't hold tight enough his tom might float away.

The maned tom lay awake the entire night just holding the tux and feeling him breath softly. The sheer guilt and shame he felt from the aftermath of what he'd done was too much to bear yet he had no other option but to do so. As he lay he came to the realisation that this strange, new kind of pain wasn't just going to dissipate like all of his fleeting feelings he'd had before. Misto was the only cat he really loved and felt passionate about and now he came to understand that jeopardizing their relationship made him feel so awful because of that deep-rooted love. It was strange for him to be shown by his own feelings how much he really adored Misto and how seriously any action against their relationship affected him; on the whole he found it quite scary. How was he going to cope keeping what he'd done from him? He felt like a truly terrible cat for having done it and if he weren't so deathly frightened to lose Misto he knew he would be livid with himself. Perhaps that would come in time, he didn't know. All he did know at that moment was that he never wanted to let his mate go and that it was now his duty to show him just how devoted to making him happy he was.

The next morning was a fine example of this revelation. As soon as the sun started to light up the junkyard Tugger very carefully released Misto and stood up from the bed where he lay. Taking a good, long look at his sleeping mate's shapely, well-sculpted back he sighed and turned to leave the den. Very quietly he stepped out into the fresh morning air and blinked in the dim, early light. It would still be a while before the day really begun and Tugger felt comforted by that. At least he wouldn't be bothered by anyone, even his stupid brother who was surprisingly nowhere to be seen. Taking a few steps across the junk he took in a huge breath of the cool air hoping that in some way it might purify him and make him feel less wretched. It didn't. As he carried on over the junk he passed mound after mound and eventually found himself some way from the clearing – not so far that it would take a while to get back but just far enough that if anyone did come out then they wouldn't know he was nearby. Taking in the solitude he sat down on an overturned butter tub and placed his face in his paws. He was tired, really tired. He rubbed his sore, heavy eyes trying to rid them of their irritation but as soon as he stopped he found that trying to do anything to soothe his unhappiness and self-resentment was useless. It wasn't so much his body that was the problem, it was his heart – or at least what he felt in it. Why wouldn't this stupid guilt go away? It was quite literally the worst feeling he'd ever experienced; or was it? There had been another time he'd felt this awful and that was when he'd watched Misto's blood pouring out from beneath him when he'd landed on that glass after falling from the tree they had first made love in. Watching his tom plead with his eyes for help and then slip into unconsciousness from the loss of blood had been the most terrifying experience of his entire life and the fear that he might lose his mate then was the same as the fear he felt now except this time there was someone to blame. It was he, he was to blame for how terrible he felt and the risk of losing Misto and there was simply no way to pass it onto anyone or anything else. This was a mess of his own making and no matter how much he wanted to forget it there was just no easy way of doing so. Moving his paws around to the back of his head and rubbing his ears he looked down to the ground and moaned sadly. What was he going to do?

Letting out a long, miserable sigh he pondered that question and then he suddenly paused. He opened his eyes and sat up straight with his paws by his side. Hadn't he decided last night to prove to Misto and to himself that he loved him more than anything? He had, so why was he just sitting there? If he couldn't take back what he'd done to potentially ruin their relationship then he could certainly do something now to strengthen it. Jumping up he took off over the junk, back towards the clearing and then out of the junkyard. He had an idea and he knew there was no gesture too small to show Misto that he was the most important cat in the world to him.

* * *

As the sun started to peek over the tallest mounds of junk in the yard a gentle light started to filter into the den Misto slept in. Having been released from the clutches of Tugger for a fair while now he had unconsciously snuggled down into the blankets he lay on. The comfort they provided wasn't as nice as that which came from Tugger but they would do. Besides, the tux had no idea he had been left alone to keep warm by himself so he naturally provided his own comfort.

As he slept he dreamt happily of dancing across the night sky amongst the stars and around the moon. He had always found the night very mystical and like all Jellicles he felt in some way spiritually connected to the moon – for what reason he didn't know. As his dream went on he smiled softly in his sleep as he leapt through the inky blackness dotted with tiny specks of light and as he danced he left trails of colourful sparkles across the huge canvas of sky that was all for him and he sent bursts of magic darting all around him. He was truly contented with these wonderful images until inevitably the dream quickly changed as dreams tend to do. He was no longer dancing through the stars, instead they had vanished and now he was left alone in the darkness with a faint glow ahead of him. The spectre in his imagination came towards him and straight away he found it was Tugger. Somehow he just knew the maned tom was not alright and as he looked he saw Tugger had the same sad expression that he noticed the day before and it made the small tom fell incredibly sad to dream about his mate in such a state. As the dream seemed to become darker Misto called out to the dream-Tugger,

"What's wrong, darling? Why are you so sad?"

'You can't know," replied dream-Tugger, "I did it"

"Did what?"

"You make me sad. It's what you've done to me"

"What do you mean?"

"You know"

Misto's mind didn't respond to that as it didn't seem to make any sense and as his dream once again changed dream-Tugger started to change shape. Misto watched as his mate became different colours and forms and then marvelled when his mate turned into bacon. And what wonderful bacon it was. In his mind's eye he could see the tasty, crispy treat and he could even smell it as all of his senses were tempted.

The experience was so delicious he started to stir from his slumber and very gently opened his eyes to the morning. Looking straight ahead for a moment he then yawned widely and settled back down to look at the den properly. As he lay he contemplated his dream while the remnants still lingered in his mind. It had been so nice to begin with but then the Tugger he had dreamt told him that something he'd done was the reason he was sad. Or was that wrong? Had dream-Tugger really said that? The memory of the dream was fading fast and the small tom couldn't quite remember what he had invented in his sleep, all he knew was that he had a strange feeling within him that was not altogether settling and it suggested that perhaps despite what Tugger had told him he had done something to upset him. One thing he definitely did remember though was dream-Tugger turning into bacon and as he revisited the fading memory he woke up a little more and felt his stomach respond to the sensation with a gentle growl.

Now that he was more awake he looked out across the den and took in the surroundings. Sitting nearby was Tugger looking strangely timid but mostly happy and Misto felt instantly comforted by the sight. With sleepy eyes he looked back at him dreamily and rested his head more firmly on the pillow he held in his arms.

"Hey, Tug. Up already?" he said softly

"Yeah, no idea why" replied Tugger with a half-smile, "Gave me time to think about my wonderful mate and how much I love him"

Misto yawned again and smiled back, "Oh yeah? What's he like?"

'_And so we begin' _thought Tugger. "Oh, he's sure something. Very sweet and kind, great dancer, absolutely beautiful…"

Misto blushed and giggled slightly at the comment.

"…and he's quite the magician to. I've never seen another cat quite as clever as he"

"Oh, I'm sure there must be some," said Misto bashfully

"I doubt it. In fact he's so wonderful I thought he deserved to wake up to something almost as pretty as he is," said Tugger as he reached behind him and brought out a rosebud. Misto leant up at that to take a look at what Tugger held in his paws and smiled as he took it in. The flower had not yet opened fully since it was still early and Misto knew Tugger must have had to cut it at just the right time to get it in the perfect position so it could look its best. With a smile the Maine Coon offered it to the smaller tom and he took it gently in his paws to look at it properly. Misto smiled wider as he held the bud to his nose and took in its sweet, fresh scent. It was that and the deep red velvetiness of the petals that made it such a beautiful gift and the magical tom marvelled at how so much beauty could be held in something so small and delicate – an expression that Tugger always enjoyed watching his mate display. As Misto explored the flower and smiled widely Tugger felt that same feeling of amazement over how his mate could see so many layers of beauty and mysticism in the smallest of objects. The expression that resulted that he'd come to see quite often at moments like these warmed his heart as the quiet seconds passed by. As he thought back over how long he'd known Misto he realised that the tux had always been that insightful but it was only now that they were in love that he really noticed it. The thought made Tugger feel slightly better about himself since it reminded him how close they really were. However, he knew there was still a long way to go until he could feel he had resolved his wrongdoing if indeed that was possible.

Misto wasn't aware of any of Tugger's feelings at that moment as he was almost entranced by the flower he'd been gifted with. More to the point he felt touched that his mate had awoken early and been thoughtful enough to go out and find the prettiest rosebud he'd ever seen so that the tux would have something nice to wake up to. It was incredibly romantic and inside the black and white tom swooned a little as he thought about how well Tugger could balance being devilishly sexy and so spectacularly loving. With a grin that was becoming ever wider Misto looked over at Tugger and spoke softly,

"This is really sweet of you, Tug. It's really beautiful"

"Nearly as beautiful as you" said Tugger starting to lay on the charm and Misto felt his heart flutter even more. He simply blushed more deeply and averted his eyes making Tugger chuckle.

"What prompted you to find it for me?" asked Misto a few moments later

"I just thought you'd like it. Anything I can do to make you happy, I'll do it"

"I don't deserve you," said Misto dreamily returning his eyes to him. Tugger's smile faltered a little but not enough that Misto would notice. He knew deep inside that he was dirt and that Misto deserved more, way more. He was a disgusting cat living under an umbrella of lies and secrets and he knew that if Misto found out he'd be heartbroken. He tried really hard to feel what he assumed Misto was feeling at that moment but it was simply impossible with the memory of he and Bomba rutting together stuck firmly in his mind. His body felt dirty as the thought overcame him and he absent-mindedly rubbed his fur as if he were trying to preen the imaginary filth from it.

"You do, darling. You deserve so much, that's why…" said Tugger trying to forget the bad thoughts and turning again to bring out a folded napkin. "…I brought you this too"

Misto looked curiously at what Tugger held and felt himself grow very eager to find out what it was. Tugger happily unfolded the napkin and displayed something that made Misto very excited.

"Oh, Tugger, where did you get that?" he asked gleefully. Tugger just looked back at him with a big smile and offered his mate the bacon he held in his paws. Misto took it eagerly and started nibbling it within seconds.

"I got it from that café around the corner. Some stupid human was going to eat it but I jumped up on the table and while it was confused I snatched it from its plate and ran"

Misto swallowed, "Did it catch you?"

"Nearly. Some other human sent its Pollicle after me but I got away just in time"

"You put yourself in danger to get this for me?"

"Ehh, sort of. It was worth it for you, babe"

Misto's smile became dreamier and more heart-felt at that. Tugger surely couldn't be a better mate if he tried. He'd gone so far out of his way just for the sake of making him happy. What a kind, wonderful, selfless thing to do!

"Thank you" said Misto quietly as his heart was warmed by how loved he felt

"Anytime" replied Tugger

"Would you like some?"

"Don't mind if I do," said Tugger getting up and joining Misto on the bed. Together they ate the breakfast treat and when finished they lay back down on the bed to snooze and allow time for the junkyard to properly come to life.

* * *

"Do you think they'll be any better today?" asked Jellyorum as she threaded her needle back and forth through the fabric she held

"I should think so, but if you ask me they got what they deserved," replied Jenny as she concentrated on the other side.

The two queens sat together outside Jenny's den sewing and nattering away endlessly as they tended to do day in day out. They had been prattling on to each other for a while now but the conversation had only just turned to the topic of the aftermath of Tugger's excursion two nights ago. The previous day they had watched the partying Jellicles slowly emerge from their homes and try to make a successful start to their morning – or in most cases afternoon. Needless to say only Skimble had been successful and surprisingly Jenny hadn't been that bothered by his tagging along with the others. It was probably due to the fact that the ginger tabby was Scottish and it's common knowledge that the Scottish can out-drink everyone. As such, Skimble hadn't reacted that badly to the booze and had managed to begin the tasks set out for him by Jenny as a compromise for his leaving her alone for the night. In stark contrast Alonzo had not fared very well that day and only emerged to seek water and Munk. The two toms spoke quietly whenever Alonzo came out since it was quite obvious that he had been incredibly embarrassed by the state he had put himself in the night prior. Munk had quietly visited him throughout the day and each time he came back out Jenny and Jelly gave him a certain look as if to ask 'Not feeling so good, is he?' The wry smiles the queens shared with Munk provided them with plenty of entertainment for the rest of the day and when news came of Demeter's condition they were left with plenty to gossip about. For them it had been a nice day yet now they sat together wondering if perhaps their fellow tribe members might still be a little ill.

"Did you see Victoria yesterday?" asked Jelly

"Yes, I went and checked on her after seeing to Misto and the poor dear was in quite a state"

"How so?"

"She looked positively green under that pretty white fur and I would have felt awfully sorry for her had it not been a mess of her own making"

"Well, I suppose we all have to learn"

"Indeed. I hope this experience will make sure she and Misto don't touch the stuff again. They're still so young and I'd hate to see them go the way of you know who"

"Tugger?"

"Of course"

"I'm not sure anyone could turn quite as bad as he"

"Well, strange as it may sound I have to give him credit for changing so much ever since he and Misto got together. I'm sure though that a lot of it is Misto's impression on him and not a change of his own volition as I'd like to believe"

"Perhaps, before, Tugger was just looking for someone like Misto and that's why he was the way he was"

"Hmm, well, whatever the case I'm just glad that he's calmed down and they're happy together."

"Yeah" smiled Jelly, "it's always lovely to see the young ones fall in love, isn't it?"

"Certainly is. I remember when me and Skimble were that young…Gosh, that seems like such a long time ago now…"

"I remember…" chuckled Jelly, "You two were quite the pair of lovebirds"

"Well, what about you and Gus? You two were far worse than Skimble and I ever were!"

Jelly laughed softly and a nostalgic look appeared in her eye. She was quiet for a while and Jenny decided to ask her a question,

"Do you miss him?"

Jelly just looked at her and smiled, "Sometimes. He was getting on though and I suppose we all have to go to Heaviside sometime. I treasure the time we had, and it was certainly a long time at that"

"That's true." Said Jenny happy that she hadn't made her friend miss her mate too badly. She knew Jelly very well and she understood just how much she loved Gus before he went up to the Heaviside Layer. It was comforting to know that her friend of so many years was happy with her life just as it was and was at peace with the way the Everlasting Cat worked.

"Well, look who it is…" perked up Jelly as she gestured across the clearing. Jenny turned and smiled with raised eyebrows when she saw what it was Jelly was pointing at. Across from them emerged a slightly better looking Bomba than yesterday and they giggled like kittens when they saw her notice them. Blushing, the red queen gingerly stepped down from the junk and steadily paced across the clearing trying to ignore the enjoyment of the spectacle by the clucking queens that watched her. She was quite embarrassed about her behaviour during the past 48 hours but she was mortified and ashamed over one very specific occurrence during that time. As soon as Tugger had triggered the memory of she and him drunkenly screwing she had been stunned as it certainly wasn't like her to sleep around with mated toms. Once he had left her alone she had spent a long time sitting with her head in her paws and feeling awful about herself. She felt like a dirty hussy for stealing Tugger from Misto and while she knew that he was also to blame she couldn't shake the feeling that she would be responsible for their breakup should Misto find out. Seeing herself as a vile bimbo she had decided to stay indoors for the rest of the day and try to manage the disgrace she felt. She hadn't even gone out to see Demeter even though she was the one cat that Bomba really needed to talk to – that was were she was going now. The red queen didn't know how to feel or what to think, there was too much going on within her that made her feel conflicted and the worst thing was she didn't feel as if she could keep a secret so huge and not break down. She needed to tell someone and she knew in her heart that Demeter was the one to confide in. As she walked across the clearing she thought about how disappointed and angry the black and gold queen was going to be with her and the feeling that she might be rejected made emotion well up in her throat. By the time she got to her best friend's den she was on the verge of tears and considered running back to her home to hide her shame.

Taking a deep breath she timidly forced herself to go in and announced herself quietly,

"Deme? Are you here? It's me…"

There was some rustling right at the back of the den and in a moment Demeter came into view with a kind smile on her face.

"Hey, Bomba. How's it going?" she asked as she walked past the queen and carried on with what she was doing

"I need to talk to you," said Bomba looking down

"What about, babe?" Demeter paused and looked at her downtrodden friend, "Is something wrong?"

The red queen silently nodded and kept her eyes to the ground. Noticing this Demeter stepped toward her and placed a paw on her shoulder.

"What's up?"

Bomba looked her in the eye and quietly spoke through her shame,

"I've done something bad"

Demeter guided her to some cushions and took her friend's paws in hers giving her an understanding, caring look,

"How bad?"

Bomba decided not to labour this anymore than she had to. Begrudgingly she jumped straight to the point,

"I slept with Tugger"

Demeter was silent for a moment before gently piping up to clarify,

"Recently?"

"The night we all went out"

"Oh…" Demeter looked ever so slightly to the side off into thin air as she took in that blatant revelation. Taking a few moments for it to sink in she then returned her gaze to the red queen, "Why?...I mean…How?"

Bomba looked down again and shook her head, "I don't know. We were drunk and I guess one thing led to another"

"Huh…" Demeter didn't know quite what to make of this. She could see it was a delicate subject for her friend and that she wanted to talk about it but what was she meant to say? "Does Misto know?"

"No. Tugger said it would break his heart but I guess I kinda knew that all along"

"You did it knowing he and Misto were mated?" said Demeter as more of a statement than a question

"I was drunk, he was drunk, I guess I wanted him and so I went for it and he didn't stop me"

"Oh my…" trailed Deme remembering some of things Bomba had come out with on their night out. "I suppose I can see how then"

"What do you mean?"

"Just, the pieces seem to fit together…I can't believe this"

Bomba bit her lip, "I know it's terrible and I'm sorry. I'm really, really sorry!"

Demeter shook her head lightly, "It's not me you need to be sorry to, dear"

"I know. I just really need a friend right now" the red queen said sadly

"Well, you've still got me"

Bomba smiled weakly at her. Demeter continued,

"So what are you going to?"

"Nothing. No one can know it happened"

"You're going to lie to Misto?"

Bomba swallowed hard, "Not really, Tugger's just not going to tell him"

"Oh my…"

"It's the only way to stop him from being hurt"

"What about you?"

Bomba sighed, "I wouldn't dare. Those two are perfect for each other so no matter how I feel or felt they need to stay together"

"Yeah…I guess you're right…"

The pair were silent for a few seconds before Demeter spoke again,

"How do you feel about all of this?"

Bomba crossed her arms and looked to the side before glancing at her friend, "I feel like such a slag. I mean, I slept with Tugger behind Misto's back and considering our history it looks and feels like I tried to steal him like I tried to before. I know I didn't want to steal him this time but it would look like it to Misto. I feel so cheap and nasty, Deme, and I don't think that's a feeling I can handle too well!"

"So what are you going to do?"

"I don't know. What do you think I should do?"

Demeter thought for a moment and felt quite sorry for Bomba. On the one paw she was disappointed that Bomba could have done what she did with Tugger knowingly – regardless of how drunk she was – but on the other Bomba was her friend and she hated to see her so down.

"You don't want Misto to know, right?"

"Of course not, I don't want to hurt him"

"But you still want Tugger?"

"I don't know. I don't think so, if anything it feels like now we're well and truly over and what's more I think I'm ready to start forgetting about him. It would be best for me and best for everyone"

"Do you think you can live with the secret?"

Bomba sighed again, "I promised Tugger I would so I suppose I have to"

"But do you think you can?"

"Yeah. It'll be tough but I can do it"

"That's good. It's a shame all this happened in the first place but I…well…I don't know…" said Demeter. Knowing that all of this happened put her in a tricky situation. It went against her morals to keep the information she'd been provided with a secret but she really didn't want to cause a rift in the tribe. Would it be better to go along with the secret? Above that, why was it shared with her in the first place? "Why did you tell me this, Bomba?" she asked curiously

"I needed to offload," she said sadly

"Fair enough. I just don't know how I feel about it…"

Bomba looked up hurriedly, "You won't tell anyone, will you? Please don't!"

"Of course I won't, I wouldn't dare! It's just such a horrible situation, you know?"

Bomba nodded, "I do. I feel terrible about it, you understand that I really never wanted this to happen, right?"

"You never wanted Tugger back at all?"

"I don't now but maybe I did then. Even so, I didn't want him like this. I know I might push the bar a bit from time to time but I don't steal toms from other cats. I learnt that from the last time I got jealous and I'm sure everyone remembers how badly wrong that went. Misto nearly died and it was all my fault so I decided I'd never do something so stupid ever again. This was an accident and if I could take it back I would"

"I know," said Demeter caringly, "I know you better than you do"

Bomba smiled weakly, "So you understand?"

"For the most part. I suppose I'm just sorry you have to live with this now"

"I'm hoping we can just forget it eventually"

Demeter took her friends paws again, "I hope you will too. In the meantime I'll be here for you"

"Thanks, Deme. Thanks for listening and not getting angry"

Deme smiled wider, "Come on, when do you and I get angry at each other?"

* * *

Tugger held Misto's paw as the two exited their den together. They both smiled as they stepped out into the bright sunshine and breathed in the sweet smelling air. Days like this made Tugger quite sleepy and he would usually be found sprawled out in the sun somewhere lazing about until the night came and he could have his fun. Misto was not too dissimilar: he much preferred the night to the day but when a day happened to be as good as this he liked to go out and find something interesting. Spring and summer symbolised new life and vibrancy to him and who was he to miss out on that?

As they climbed down the junk with Misto leading Tugger did his best to look interested in whatever it was his mate wanted to do. Although he was trying to show Misto he loved him enough to do anything for him he still had the draw to the best spot for basking and on the inside he secretly wished he could entice his mate to laze about for the day. Unfortunately for Tugger that did not seem a likely option seeing as Misto trotted along with a determined look in his eyes but in reality no ideas of what to do.

"So what do you wanna do, Misty?" asked Tugger with feigned energy. The tux looked at him with a raised eyebrow. Tugger just mimicked the expression making Misto smile.

"Misto, if you don't mind" replied the smaller tom, "and I'm not sure. What do you wanna do?"

"Well, I know a nice little spot not too far from here that gets loads of sunlight. It's a great place to nap and lay about if-"

"Come on, Tug, we can lay about anytime! Let's do something fun"

"That is fun when it's me you're lying with"

"Turn it off! Let's…I dunno, go on an adventure or something"

"An adventure?" asked Tugger amusedly. Misto looked a little embarrassed,

"Well, you know, something like that…"

"Hey, whatever you want, Captain Mistoffelees"

"Well, what would you do?"

"As I said, there's this little spot not too far from-"

"Tugger! Come on, let's do something awesome"

"Well, just name it and we'll do it"

"But I don't know what"

Tugger rolled his eyes, "Umm…I dunno…we could go fishing?"

Misto paused for a moment and looked at his mate curiously. With an inquisitive and slightly cheeky tone he responded,

"Fishing?"

"Well, yeah. How about it?"

"There aren't any rivers around here, are there? At least not one with fish, right?"

"Well it's not fishing in the conventional sense. We need to find one of those human markets"

"You mean steal it?"

"Not necessarily" said Tugger slyly

"Do you know where one of those is?"

"I'm sure there'll be one somewhere"

"Huh…" trailed off Misto in contemplation. The idea sounded exciting, fun and dangerous all at the same time. It was certainly not something he'd done before and he was a little apprehensive. Nonetheless it sounded like too good an idea to pass up and he happily took Tugger's paw to be led away.

As they started moving they were greeted with the sight of Bomba emerging from Munk and Demeter's den. Misto smiled and waved when he saw the red queen but then became curious as to why she looked so uneasy and stunned as soon as she saw them. If he had looked up he would have noticed Tugger with the same expression and found that the two had locked eyes in an awkward understanding of each other. A few seconds later Tugger averted his gaze and picked up the pace,

"Come on, Misto" he said gruffly while dragging his mate along. Misto was confused by the sudden yanking and change in Tugger's mood but decided it best not to ask what was up, Tugger had been acting strangely these past two days but it seemed that now was not the right to time to question him. Hopefully they could still have a nice day out.

**So Tugger knows he's been a bad boy and is trying to make it up to Misto. Let's hope he commits himself and doesn't go all Tugger about it.**

**Thanks for reading, please review. **


	7. Tugger Gets Tied Up

**Hey, guys! Here's another one for ya! Hope you like it. **

**Once the worry is dispelled Misto and Tugger find their love growing stronger than ever.**

**WARNING: Allusions to sexual situations**

**Love Is No Fairytale**

**Chapter 7**

**Tugger Gets Tied Up**

"Quick, Misto, grab it!" yelled Tugger

"I'm trying! I'm trying! It's too slippery!" replied Misto frantically

"Use your claws!"

"But what if I-"

"Now!"

Misto quickly did as he was told and sunk his claws into the flesh of the fish that lay on the crushed ice upon which he stood. Just as the market trader was turning back from the decoy that was Tugger Misto picked up the fish and jumped down from the stall. The enraged human bellowed something incomprehensible and with a great amount of stumbling lumbered around the stand and went after Misto who stood on the ground with the fish stock-still like a deer in headlights.

"Everlasting, Misto! Run!" screamed Tugger as he looked at his mate stand petrified in confusion. It took the smaller tom a second to jolt himself from his shock but when he saw the human approaching quickly with a mad look on its face he spun on his paws and belted towards his mate. Together they ran through the busy human market and back in the direction of the junkyard. As they ran they started to laugh at the fact that they'd managed to pull off their operation to sneakily acquire the fish and felt safe in the knowledge that they were much faster than the stupid, noisy human which soon gave up its chase once they were long out of its reach. Together Misto and Tugger rounded a few corners and then quickly darted towards a gap in a fence to hide away. Misto grabbed onto Tugger's arm and pulled him along as he started to run faster towards his target. Tugger felt a panic rise within him as he realised they were too big to fit through.

"Misto, we'll never fit! Come on, let's go this way!" said the leopard spotted tom as he tried to pull his mate in a different direction. Misto just held on tighter and continued towards the tiny gap.

"Trust me, Tug, we'll fit!"

Tugger held his breath as they ran at the small hole and flinched when they darted into it. When he opened his eyes he found they were standing on the other side of the fence in a shady alleyway where no one would find them. Taking a second to breathe Tugger felt a wave of relief come over him and smiled as he looked at his mate and the words _'He can fit through the tiniest crack' _trailed through his mind. They then stood panting for a few seconds looking in the direction of the gap they had run through to make sure that nothing followed them and then started to relax when they realised they'd gotten away with it. The two toms began to laugh again as they looked at the fish their efforts had landed them with and Tugger clapped a paw on his mate's back while chuckling,

"Nice job, babe, but next time just run straight away"

Misto blushed a little but remained smiling, "I've never done that before, I didn't know what to do"

"Well, even so: well done"

"Couldn't I have just used magic?" asked Misto innocently but really feeling a little smug. Tugger stopped laughing and looked at his mate while cocking his head to the side slightly,

"You waited until after we finished to suggest that?"

Misto smiled sneakily but Tugger wasn't annoyed. He simply ruffled the fur on Misto's head and spoke again.

"Silly kitty"

"I thought about it but your way seemed more fun. Sorry, Tug"

"Don't worry, darling, you did a great job without it"

"Sure?"

"Of course. We got it didn't we?"

Misto looked back down at the scaly creature he held and smiled, "Yeah, I guess so"

"There you are then. Now, we best eat it before it starts going bad"

Misto looked at Tugger and then back at the fish,

"You wanna start?"

"No, no, sweetheart. Go ahead"

"You always eat more than me though"

"Even so, you first"

"You're not implying I'm a queen, are you?" asked Misto with a cheeky smile

"What?"

"You know: Ladies First"

Tugger laughed loudly at Misto's reasoning and had to steady himself against the fence to keep from falling down.

"Oh, Misto! How do you come up with these things?"

Tugger continued to laugh and soon Misto giggled along with him.

"Alright! Alright! I'll have some first if it'll make you happy"

"Does that mean you're admitting to being a queen then?" teased Tugger

"No. Hey, if anyone's a queen here it's you"

"I beg your pardon?"

"Think about it. You spend more time in the mirror than anyone I know, you preen yourself endlessly and you're far too sensitive"

"I am not!"

"You are"

"You know this is the Rum Tum Tugger you're talking to, don't you?" said Tugger cockily as he fluffed his mane and gyrated his hips a little in Misto's direction. Misto gave him an unimpressed look even though on the inside he felt a flutter – how was it that even now Tugger could make him weak at the knees with barely any effort?

"Well, I'm the Magical Mister Mistoffelees and there was never a cat so clever as me and I can see right through you, you not-so-curious cat"

Tugger initially feigned offence and then quickly displayed more cockiness before throwing a paw around Misto's waist and pulling him close,

"I'm sure there's still a few things you haven't seen that I can show you, Mister Mistoffelees"

"Oh yeah? And what are those?" said Misto trying to mimic his mate's seductive tone

Tugger cocked an eyebrow, "Oh, wouldn't you like to know?"

"Pfft" said Misto pretending not to have any interest

"So are you gonna eat that fish or not?"

"Oh, right. Well, as long as you don't think I'm a queen"

"Your call" said Tugger slyly. Misto eyed him and then decided to ignore his mate's teasing. It was when he had a mouthful of fish and couldn't respond that Tugger started to make lady jokes about him. Those jokes kept coming until much later on, long after they'd finished the fish and bantered back and forth for a while. Tugger seemed to be on a role as he made comment after comment about Misto being a queen and but the smaller tom wasn't that phased. As such he responded in kind with jokes about Tugger's vanity and insecurities and his jibes were far more intelligent than his mate's thereby successfully overshadowing them. Eventually Tugger found himself bested and reluctantly conceded victory. Being a nice tom Misto decided not to rub it in and instead he nuzzled his mate affectionately and kissed him lightly on the cheek to let him know he didn't mean any of his quips about Tugger being self-obsessed – despite how much truth there actually was to them.

By this time they were casually strolling down a quiet street not too far from the junkyard and were near enough to returning home when Misto decided to ask Tugger about the feelings he'd been having recently.

"Tug, can I ask you something?"

"Anything you like"

Misto hesitated for a moment, "Well, you know how I asked you a few days ago about whether everything was alright with you?"

"Yeah?" said Tugger cautiously

"I know you said everything was fine but are you sure there's nothing bothering you? Aside from today I've just been wondering if, well, there's anything on your mind that's got you worried?"

Tugger was instantly thrown back into the fear that he thought he'd get through the day without feeling and he felt a quiver in his throat as he responded,

"Misto, I already told you everything's fine"

"I know", said Misto uneasily, "But I've just been wondering if maybe I did something that put you on edge?"

Tugger closed his eyes for a second as the shame of his accident with Bomba washed over him again. Sometimes he really hated how intuitive Misto could be and he cursed himself for not making sure the smaller tom realised that it wasn't he that was causing Tugger's strange behaviour – albeit less noticeably strange by now. Swallowing hard he forced himself to respond,

"Please understand, Misto, that there's nothing you could ever do to upset me and I'm sorry for not making you realise that. Clearly I'm not being a good enough mate to show you that" Tugger kicked himself internally for knowing that there were many layers to that truth.

"You would tell if there were something wrong, wouldn't you?"

Tugger felt his guilt explode inside him and he had to force himself not to hide his face in shame. A strained "Sure" was all he could manage.

Misto felt a little more secure now. He wished he understood why Tugger was acting differently from time to time but at least he knew now that it wasn't his fault. As long as he could truly convince himself of that then he knew he'd feel better down the line.

Soon, Misto and Tugger made their way back to the junkyard and retired to their den to rest a little while. Together they lay down on their bed and snuggled up. The silence was soon broken by a gentle purr eliciting from each of them and as if on cue they moved their heads to look into each other's eyes. What they each saw in each other's eyes were completely different things. Misto saw the love he shared with his mate purely and simply. In those deep, dark eyes he found the comfort and security he'd come to know whenever he was around his mate and he felt truly blessed to have been dealt this wonderful cat who held him lovingly in his arms. Tugger was not so fortunate. The sweet, caring feeling he used to get from looking into Misto's big, bright blue eyes was missing and in its place was his own guilt and shame. Tugger knew Misto had no idea of his mishap a few nights ago but nonetheless he felt so guilty for having done what he did and it had become what he saw whenever he looked at his mate. As he continued to look he sighed and felt sorrier for himself than he had done previously. If trying to show Misto just how much he loved him didn't shift the guilt then what would? Maybe he needed to hear that he was loved,

"Misto, you love me, right?" asked Tugger quietly

"You know I do" said the black and white tom as he turned his head and gently rested it to the side of Tugger's. The bigger tom wasn't satisfied so he turned Misto's head back to face his,

"Tell me you do"

"What are you on about now, Tugger?"

"Just tell me you love me"

"Why?"

"Please, Misto, I need to hear it"

"There is something wrong, isn't there?" said Misto pushing himself up and looking down at Tugger. The maned tom panicked internally as the feeling he'd been figured out filled him. Desperately he racked his brain for anything to throw his mate off his scent,

"Um…no. I just really want to hear you say it"

"But why?" asked Misto with a stressed look on his face

"Everlasting, Misto! I've been telling you I love you all day so would it hurt for you to say it back?" It came out angrier than Tugger had intended and he suddenly felt like even more of an idiot when he saw Misto look so surprised and then recoil in nervous bewilderment. A tense moment passed in complete silence with neither really knowing what to do. Eventually Misto said the words Tugger had demanded,

"I love you, Tugger. I love you so much and I really wish you'd tell me what it is that's bothering you. If it's not me then what is it?"

"It's nothing"

"Tugger" said Misto with a pleading but knowing look in his eye. It was a look that Tugger could barely resist and he knew he couldn't go any further without telling Misto something. After a long while of looking at his mate he sighed and pushed himself up to sit in front of him. Taking a stiff breath he started to speak,

"The other night when we went out…"

"Yes?"

"I…well, I was reminded of the way I used to be and what life was like before you and I became mates"

"Okay"

"I remembered how crazy and stupid I used to be and how I used to use cats and then toss them away like garbage. It made me think the next day that I haven't shown you how important you are to me and I've been worried that if I can't then you might lose interest"

It was a filthy lie and Tugger felt worse than he ever had done to say it. The situation was becoming messier and messier and Tugger knew that the more complicated it got the harder it would be to handle and keep Misto from finding out. Fortunately for him Misto seemed to believe what he had said and took his paws in his. Tugger was looking down and Misto met his gaze when he leant forward to make eye contact.

"Tugger, you've already shown me how much you love me by sticking with me during the worst time in my life and then saving me when I nearly died. I'll always love you for doing that and I could never loose interest in you. You're my mate and that means the world to me. Do you understand?"

Tugger gave him a weak smile and looked at him with pride. He was truly lucky to have Misto.

"I do. You are absolutely amazing. I'm sorry I snapped"

Misto smiled warmly back, "It's okay. As long as you feel better nothing else matters"

"I do" he lied, "Thanks"

Misto then had a thought and in a matter of moments a naughty look graced his face. The black and white tom had an idea for how to show Tugger he loved him and he knew it was something that his mate would respond well to. Putting on his sexiest growl Misto leant forward and spoke into his ear,

"How about I show you just how much you mean to me in a way that's a little more to your liking?"

"Oh yeah, what's th-…oh" said Tugger cutting himself off when he figured it out. Misto laughed sensually in his throat when Tugger clicked onto what he was talking about and as he watched his mate bat his eyelids the bigger tom felt a twinge of doubt manifest inside him. This would be the first time he had sex with Misto since his 'accident' and it felt bad to be doing the same action that had thrown him into so much turmoil. But why? Making love with Misto before was truly a magical experience but now that he'd done it with Bomba the very act felt dirty and he was apprehensive to do it without making peace with his guilt. What was he going to tell Misto though? The tom had just told him he loved him more than anything and wanted to show him physically; he couldn't very well say no, could he?

As he worried Misto started rubbing him in just the right way and kissing his cheek lightly before working his way to his mouth. The maned tom went into autopilot at that moment and responded to Misto's actions in kind while he tried to think clearly about what was going to happen. Had sex with Bomba that night been that great? He couldn't remember so surely if it had been then he would, wouldn't he? What's more, making love with Misto was better than anything he'd had before so even if he did feel bad over what he'd done then the feeling of making love now would send that away, right?

Tugger decided to give it his best shot. Maybe this was what he needed to feel better. If he could prove to himself that making love to Misto was the greatest feeling he knew of then surely what he'd done with Bomba wouldn't matter. He would be safe in the knowledge that no matter what he did he'd never find anyone as good as Misto and as such wouldn't ever make the same mistake again.

He didn't feel as if he'd entirely convinced himself but he didn't care anymore. He was getting caught up in the heat of the moment and as such he stopped thinking and took over from Misto's lead. Pretty soon they were caught up in fiery passion and the rest of reality faded away as they became the only object in each other's worlds.

* * *

Two young queens sat together watching the sunset. The pair had just emerged from their respective homes and were taking the start to their night slowly and lazily. As they watched the great, orange orb start to descend below the horizon they chatted idly about the whereabouts of their friend and his mate and became aware of the fact that they hadn't really seen him since the night in which they'd gone out on the town.

"Do you think he's okay?" asked Victoria timidly

"Oh, I'm sure he's fine. We were all pretty trashed the other night so there's why we didn't see him yesterday and as for today I think he and Tugger went out alone together" replied Jemima. Victoria breathed out in a near-silent sigh which was just loud enough for her friend to notice. "Something up?"

"We don't spend as much time together anymore, you, Misto and I. I kinda miss it"

Jemima nodded gently in understanding and shared her friend's lament, "I know, but he's mated now so I guess we're not the most important cats in his life anymore"

"I don't mind that, it's just that it's weird not to hang out with him all the time like we three used to. He is my brother after all and I bet our dad wouldn't want us to grow apart"

"How is Bustopher?" asked Jemima going off topic at the mention of her friend's father

"Oh, he's fine. I reckon it won't be long before he pays a visit to the junkyard actually since he seems to have come to the decision that Misto might be being corrupted by Tugger"

"Took his time to get there, didn't he?" chuckled Jemima

"Yeah, but I think before he didn't want to believe that his son had mated to the Rum Tum Tugger of all cats"

That made Jemima laugh a little more, "Did he always think that Misto would mate to some prim, proper queen that he chose for him?"

"Probably. I don't think he's told any of his friends that Misto and Tugger are mated. I'm not sure it would reflect on him very well"

"Probably not. Does he worry about you now that Misto's not around to protect you?"

Victoria wrinkled her nose in apparent disgust, "Who said I needed protecting?"

"You know what I mean"

"Well even if he did worry I wouldn't care, I'm my own queen"

Jemima laughed heartily at that comment, it sounded so strange coming from a cat like Victoria. The white queen just crossed her arms and pouted over how silly she had been made to feel and when Jemima carried on laughing she pushed her over onto her side.

"Alright, calm down, Snowball!" replied Jemima playfully

"Don't call me Snowball"

Jemima smirked, "What is it with you and Misto? He doesn't like being called Misty and you don't like being called Snowball"

Victoria thought for a second and then shrugged, "I don't know. We've always just hated being called those names"

"Shame Tugger found out about Misty then, huh? He calls him that all the time"

"I don't think Misto minds as much when it comes from him. Besides, if Tugger wanted to annoy him there are plenty of other things he could do"

"Like what?"

"I dunno. Flirt with some other cats?"

"I don't think he would now that he has Misto"

"Well, I don't know. I certainly wouldn't put it past him"

"You think?"

"And who's to say he'd stop at flirting?" asked Victoria slyly making Jemima grimace a little.

"Come on, Vicks, Tugger wouldn't do that"

"Are you sure? It's what he lived for before he got together with Misto"

"Yeah, but you've seen how different he is now. He wouldn't do it, that I'm sure of"

"If you say so"

"He really wouldn't. He knows not to 'cos if he did then I'd pull his mane out one hair at a time"

Victoria giggled, "I reckon that would be worse than death for him"

"I bet you're right"

The two queens sat chatting and laughing for a long while after that unaware of the truth to Victoria's musings and the trouble brewing therein.

* * *

Misto lay back on the bed panting heavily with his eyes closed. That had sure been one hell of a rollercoaster ride that Tugger had given him and he felt absolutely amazing as a result. Taking a few more pants he rolled over onto his side and spread his arm across Tugger's chest who was panting nearly as heavily as he. The maned tom scooped his own arm around Misto and held him close as they lay together on their bed and enjoyed the ecstasy they provided each other with.

The moment was absolutely perfect for a few moments before the inevitable inconvenience of the memory of Tugger's accident graced his memory once more. Why did it have to appear now when the mood in the den was so wonderful? The feeling he had just shared with Misto was bliss and the maned tom felt quite cheated that it had been ripped from him nearly as soon as he'd received it. Wasn't it his right to enjoy such a feeling with his mate for as long as possible? If his troubled mind had anything to say about it then obviously not. What should have been a truly heart-warming moment was ruined for Tugger as he thought about doing the same things with Bomba that he'd just done with Misto and the familiar sense of guilt filled his body again making him feel absolutely dreadful. His plan hadn't worked and he felt stupid for ever thinking that it might. What was he going to do now?

Misto moaned softly as he lay there sleepily playing with the short fur on Tugger's chest. The maned tom looked down and observed his mate's pretty face taking in how beautiful he looked whenever he had that dreamy expression. Misto's features one could argue were truly carved by angels and Tugger smiled over having been blessed with him. As he observed him he gently ran his paw down the smaller tom's back and then frowned when he came across something he hadn't thought about in a while. Under Misto's midnight black fur he felt the clear outline of long, jagged scars that told a terrible tale of hideous injury and a time of dreadful fear for everyone. For a moment Tugger was haunted by the memory of that horrible night when Misto had received those scars and then he felt even guiltier for feeling partly to blame. Even though it had been Bomba that orchestrated the entire hate campaign that had driven Misto away he felt responsible since it was he that Bomba had been trying to take from Misto. Tugger then halted his paw and thought a little deeper for a second; had it really been his fault? He had always been on Misto's side from the outset so surely he couldn't be to blame. It had all been Bomba's doing and it was clear now that it wasn't the only time she had played a part in causing a disturbance in their relationship.

Tugger started to grow tense as he became angrier and angrier with the queen that had caused him far more trouble than she was worth and his stiff body made Misto shift in discomfort.

"Are you alright, Tug?" asked Misto softly. Tugger averted his gaze and tried to sound contented,

"Fine. I think I need some air though, it's a bit stuffy in here"

"Stay" pleaded Misto as he extended the word into a gentle and playful whine, "Please?"

Tugger just kissed him and then swung his legs over the side of the bed, "I'll be back in a sec, I promise"

Misto watched him through half-lidded eyes as he made his way across the den and stepped out into the evening. The black and white tom was left alone on the bed and snuggled down into the patch where Tugger had been lying to bask in the residual warmth left behind. As he worked himself into the spot he began to purr and his mind began to wander. He felt he was incredibly lucky to have Tugger to take care of him and as he continued in his train of thought he wondered if life from that point on would always feel as good. Taking a few minutes to enjoy his current feeling he started to doze off and as he approached the threshold for deeper sleep he was suddenly brought out of his daze by a thought that popped into his mind seemingly from nowhere. Opening his eyes he sat up on the bed and moved his legs over the side. He got up and slowly made his way across the den to where a piece of mirror stood against the wall and looked at his reflection stare back at him. Keeping his eyes on the mirror as best he could he turned his body so his back was facing it and then started to rub his paws around his sleek back as far as he could reach. Pulling the fur back in just the right places revealed the scars that lay underneath that he had absent-mindedly felt Tugger seek out a few minutes ago. As he went on he traced the scarred skin underneath and sighed as he remembered he awful pain of the accident that had caused them. The way that the glass had shattered beneath him and ripped into his flesh had been indescribably agonizing but the fear he saw in his mate had been the worst experience of that night. It wasn't long after that fall that he had passed out and from then right up until he found himself in Jenny's den was a huge black spot in his memory. The whole episode had been quite traumatizing but somehow Misto didn't feel all that bad about it anymore. Tugger had been so caring and courageous from the very moment it had begun and if it hadn't been for him Misto knew it was likely that he would have died. As such, a half-smile crossed his mouth and he let out a single chuff of laughter as the thought of bearing his scars as a result of their love rested in his mind. It was almost funny to think that to have Tugger meant he was required to carry the scars and suddenly he felt quite even with his mate in respect to whether they deserved each other or not. He had certainly gone through hell for Tugger but at the same time he knew Tugger had gone through hell for him. In the end he was glad that despite all the strife they had gone through they had ended up together and loved each other more than anything. Perhaps the scars he had weren't a result of forces trying to pull them apart but a representation of how devoted they were to each other and how they'd stop at nothing to be together.

Misto averted his gaze and shook his head lightly while rolling his eyes as he thought about his deduction. It was nice to know that the troubles they'd gone through in the past were so perilous that anything in their future couldn't come anywhere nearly as close to splitting them apart as those did.

If only he knew how wrong he was.

* * *

A week went by without much changing. Tugger's efforts to show Misto how much he loved him put the pair in a loved-up daze that to many of the other Jellicles – especially the kittens – was sickening. Each day or night they spent together was wonderful and as they went past Tugger found it increasingly easy to relax. The maned tom started to become so wrapped up in his mate that the memory of what he'd done with Bomba started to fade and by the time the next week started he managed to go entire days without thinking about it. It was true that from time to time it still did pop up but since time was going by so smoothly he felt as if that he was being shown that life could still be normal, if not better now that his devotion was being tested and he could prove to himself that he was serious about his relationship with Misto.

Misto started to forget his worries as well as Tugger seemed to become less on edge each day. Since his time was no longer spent worrying he found he had spare moments here and there to practice his magic again – that is if he could convince his mate to part from him for an hour here and there so he could do it alone. In the time that Misto was away Tugger tended to hang out in the clearing and even managed to entertain his fan club whenever they came hollering. It felt nice to still be so adored and as he entertained them he remembered how great it felt to be found so sexy. Being reminded that he was still the best looking cat in those parts – in his view – was incredibly gratifying for him and all the while his adorers were nearby he was kept in a good mood.

Those good moods were cut short whenever he saw Bomba passing and whenever they locked eyes an unbreakable awkwardness developed between them that was only left behind when they quickly parted ways without speaking. While they both knew they'd sorted their problems out officially they nonetheless didn't feel as if they could spend any time together without feeling as if they were doing something wrong. Keeping apart proved to be the only solution and not a word was spoken between them for an entire three weeks after the incident.

It was not until a spine-chilling realisation by the red queen a week later that she was forced to find Tugger and speak with him urgently one evening. In the moments prior to the discovery she had been casually chatting with Demeter when the black and gold queen had said something that struck fear into hear heart.

"There's something different about you, dear" said Demeter as she looked at her friend curiously

"Like what?" replied Bomba fairly uninterested

"I'm not sure. Have you done something different with your fur?"

"No, it's the same as always"

"Hmm. Are you feeling alright? Nothing going on with you?"

"Not that I can think of. Are you just imagining things again?"

Demeter looked her friend up and down and scrutinized every detail she could think of. Something was definitely different and she was determined to pinpoint it.

"You smell different, I'm absolutely sure about that."

"Well, you must be going crazy. I haven't done anything different whatsoever"

"I swear on my life your scent is different and somehow you look different too. Glowing almost."

Bomba rolled her eyes, "Glowing? For crying out loud… Go on then, what is my scent telling you?"

Demeter leant close to her friend and took a deep breath through her nose trying to decipher the change she swore she detected. The black and gold queen took a moment to think and then squinted her eyes before closing them and shaking her head.

"No, that can't be it. I must be imagining things"

"What?" asked Bomba with apathy

"Just something I thought that must be wrong" she said before pausing and then simply saying, "maybe…"

"Well, come on then. I you're so sure of something being different let's hear it"

Demeter bit her lip and then whispered, "Is your time of the month due, dear?"

"Well, yes actually although it's really late this m-" said Bomba before her words caught in her throat. She slammed her mouth shut tight with her eyes wide and locked on the air in front of her as the dreadful thought of what Demeter was suggesting entered her mind. After a tense moment of silence she flicked her head in Demeter's direction and spoke shakily, "Everlasting…that can't be right…I can't be…"

Demeter put her paw to her chest and responded in the same nervous tone, "When were you due?"

"About a week ago, maybe more."

"And…you and Tugger…about three weeks ago?"

Bomba started to shake and simply nodded as a tear slipped down her cheek.

"Everlasting Cat…" breathed Demeter as she rushed forward and hugged her fear-stricken friend. The two just stayed together in sheer shock for a long time after they realised this seriously awful result of Bomba and Tugger's terrible accident.

* * *

"How the hell did you do that?" asked Tugger amazedly as he sat on the edge of a secluded clearing a little way from the centre of the junkyard watching Misto privately perform for him.

"Magic" responded the black and white tom with a clever smile as he picked up the dice he'd just made appear in Tugger's mouth making the maned tom spit them out in surprise.

"You could have made me choke"

"Please" replied Misto wryly, "I'm not a sloppy magician. You never would have choked"

"Yes, I might have"

"Stop being such a sourpuss. What do you want to see next?"

"Nothing that's gonna show up in my mouth, thank you!" said Tugger sharply

"Well, any suggestions?"

Tugger thought for a moment and then smiled evilly making Misto a little apprehensive. "Alright then, wait there" said Tugger as he got up and started looking around in the junk

Misto watched him and felt uneasy as to what his mate was going to do, "What are you looking for?"

"This!" said Tugger happily as he pulled out a long length of rope from the higgledy-piggledy junk pile and advanced towards the smaller tom menacingly. Misto stepped back a few paces as the uneasiness became greater but Tugger got to him before he could take any real action. Within seconds Tugger was quickly looping the rope around Misto's body and soon the smaller tom found his movements were greatly constricted.

"Tug! Stop it! What are you doing?"

Tugger just carried on and started to laugh as he watched his mate squirm. A moment later he stepped back and admired his work and the hilarious sight that it he had created. Misto had been well and truly tied up and as he tried to move he began to topple and then fell to the ground. Tugger just continued to laugh and then took his seat once again.

"Get out of that, Magical Mister Mistoffelees!"

Misto looked at him with annoyance but then decided to play Tugger at his own game. "Fine, close your eyes"

"Why? I think I'd like to see this"

"Just do it" commanded Misto

Tugger chuckled and complied with his mate's wishes feeling very smug that he might have done something to stump him. That smugness was very short lived for no sooner had he closed his eyes he felt a great deal of fumbling and found he himself couldn't move very well. Flinging his eyes open he looked up to see his mate standing in front if him as free as a bird and then looking down he found it was now he that was tied up. The maned tom was stunned, how had Misto done that so quickly? Looking up again he saw Misto smiling widely before starting to skip around the small clearing and sing his own song,

"Oh well I never, was there ever a cat so clever as Magical Mister Mistoffelees?"

Tugger just shook his head and began to laugh; his mate was truly amazing. How he managed to do these sorts of things he knew he'd never understand but he was just happy to witness such an amazing feat of magic. As his laughing subsided he joined in with Misto's song and soon the black and white tom fell down next to him and they roared with laughter together.

"You must think you're pretty clever" said Tugger

Misto smiled in a very smug feline fashion. "I don't think, I know" he said before leaning over quickly and pecking Tugger on the lips

"Can you untie me now?"

"Hey, I had to get out of it alone so I think you should too"

"Fine" Tugger said before starting to fidget and jerk around in an attempt to loosen the rope. He soon found it was no use; Misto had well and truly incapacitated him and the little tom laughed as he saw he was victorious.

"Alright, alright, please untie me now"

"No"

"I said please"

"And I said no"

"And they call me annoying"

"Not to mention a terrible bore"

"Hey, only you say that and you know it's not true"

"Oh, isn't it?" teased Misto

"Let me out!" whined Tugger

"I'll do it if you-"

The pair were distracted when they noticed a couple of cats come into view from across the clearing. Turning properly they found them to be Bomba and Demeter with very grave looks about them.

"Good evening, Ladies" said Misto rising to greet them, "What's gotten you two so blue?"

The pair just looked at him timidly and didn't respond to his question. Bomba turned her attention to Tugger and simply said, "I need to talk to you"

Tugger felt his fur prickle a little and awkwardly asked, "Do you have to?"

"Yes, right now. It's urgent"

The big tom huffed and rolled his eyes and then turned to his mate, "Misto, if you wouldn't mind?"

The black and white tom simply clapped his paws together and in a second the rope fell from Tugger's body and landed in a loose mess. Tugger marvelled for a second and gave his mate a smile before turning to Bomba and saying, "Go on then"

Bomba shifted uncomfortably, "In private, please"

Tugger suddenly felt uneasy and looked around at each of the cats he stood with. Bomba and Demeter looked dreadful but Misto just looked confused. He felt as if he should just tell Bomba to say it in front of everyone but then he considered their history together and decided perhaps this was a delicate matter that Misto was better off not hearing.

"Alright, come on" Tugger replied moodily and walked off in the direction Bomba and Demeter had come from. Misto and Demeter were left alone in an awkward silence and the discomfort lasted until Misto could no longer bear it.

"What's going on, Deme?" he asked quietly

The black and gold queen just looked at him sadly and it took every ounce of her strength not to break down in front of him. She knew what Bomba was about to tell Tugger would affect Misto most of all and it was heart breaking to anticipate how rocky the small tom's life was about to become.

* * *

Tugger stalked down the trail leading away from the clearing with Bomba a few paces behind. He was in no mood to talk to her and he was frustrated since he knew anything she had to say wasn't going to be good news. When he was sure they were out of earshot he stopped suddenly and turned making the red queen startle. Giving her a stiff glare he spoke,

"What do you want?"

Bomba sighed and looked down as she tried to find the words to tell him what had happened,

"Tugger, you might want to sit down"

"I'm fine, just get on with it"

"It's not good news"

"Well, there's a surprise. Will you just get on with it?" he said nastily

"You're not making this easy"

"I don't owe you anything"

"Everlasting Cat! Could you show me some respect just for once?"

Tugger took a deep breath and rolled his eyes, "Fine. What's wrong?"

The red queen eyed him cautiously and then returned her eyes to the ground, "Remember what happened that night when we went out?"

Tugger's expression darkened, "Unfortunately, yes"

The queen hesitated for a moment before continuing, "That was about three weeks ago, right?"

"Yes"

"Well…" said Bomba before taking a deep breath, "…I'm late"

Tugger cocked his head slightly in confusion, "What do you mean?"

Bomba looked at him with a stricken expression and started to tear up, "I've missed my period, Tug, I've missed it by well over a week"

Tugger suddenly became very nervous and he stepped back as he waited for what he knew she was getting at. He had never even considered that this might be a consequence to his actions and as he grew more scared by the second he found the only thing he could think of was Misto. Struggling to breathe he asked her one more thing, "Do you mean…?"

The red queen started to rack with sobs as she delivered the crushing blow,

"I'm pregnant, Tugger! It's yours!"

**Oh my giddy aunt! Bomba's pregnant with Tugger's kitten/kittens! Poor Misto! How's he going to take it when he finds out? If he finds out that is. Aah!**

**So, yeah, I guess I might have given that one away beforehand so the blow isn't quite as hard as I would have liked but don't worry, there'll be some more turmoil to come that's far more perilous than this. I hope this was still entertaining enough for all of you lovely darlings!**

**Thanks for reading, please review.**


	8. In The Family Way

**Here's a question, when you're writing Cats do you feel you have to include a commentary on the way they move and act? What I mean is in real life productions the actors behave very cat-like and that gives the show a lot of its magic. When I've been writing recently I've found I haven't written about the characters' behaviours because I'm assuming it's implied. Now, however, I wonder if that's not coming across and the text becomes boring as a result. Do you lot find you have the same problem?**

**BTW, if anyone in Japan is reading this: stay safe.**

**Tugger starts to go off the rails as he tries to come to terms with what's happened. **

**WARNING: Bad language**

**Love Is No Fairytale**

**Chapter 8**

**In The Family Way**

"Pregnant?" spluttered Tugger.

He was sure he had misheard her since he suddenly felt very woozy. It seemed that whatever it was she had said to him had triggered some kind of dizzying reaction within that had made him forget where he was for a moment and become lightheaded. Surely Bomba couldn't have said she was pregnant, could she? That couldn't happen, not now. So why was she standing before him with her paw shielding her eyes as she nodded ruefully?

As the seconds ticked by the words the red queen had said repeated themselves over and over in his mind and he slowly came to the realisation that he had heard her accurately – especially upon observation of her current state. The maned tom's breathing started to feel constricted and it wasn't long before he found he had to force himself to take a breath lest he pass out from shocked asphyxiation. He could practically feel his heart beating through his chest as he strained to make his mouth produce the right shapes for words,

"Are you sure?"

Bomba looked up at him with tears running freely from her eyes and struggled to respond coherently,

"It's been long enough"

Tugger staggered back and nearly fell to the ground in shock. How could this possibly be? He couldn't have made her pregnant; he was with Misto, not her. This wasn't ever supposed to happen. He had never wanted kittens by her or at all for that matter so how could it be that he would soon be a father? More to the point how could it be that he was going to be a father without Misto being one with him?

This still seemed incomprehensible and feeling as if he were falling into a bottomless pit he asked her one more time,

"But are you absolutely sure?"

Bomba sniffed, "Demeter's sure she can smell it on me and it all just seems to fit"

Tugger quickly snapped out of his delirium and instantly became infuriated. Reaching forward he grabbed her wrist meanly,

"Well that's not fucking good enough! Come on!" he shouted before dragging her off down the trail. The red queen yelped at the pain Tugger was inflicting upon her and she tried to pull away. The tom didn't care that he was hurting her, he was too fixated on proving she was wrong. Surely this was just another one of her evil tricks to try and steal him from Misto and he had become sick and tired of the trouble she was getting him into.

"Tugger! Let me go!" whined Bomba feebly through her tears as she was pulled along. Tugger didn't say a word in reply and simply yanked her harder. He knew there was only one cat in those parts that could be certain about a matter such as this and that was where he was determined to drag Bomba to.

* * *

Misto and Demeter stood in the silent clearing without speaking as they waited for their respective counterparts to return. Each passing moment brought with it a new awkwardness and at the moments when they caught each other's eye they were forced to smile politely and pretend as if the tension wasn't killing them.

Pretty soon Misto could handle it no more and he decided to ask Demeter what was wrong again,

"Any idea what they're talking about?"

Demeter looked at him and her expression suggested that he had cornered her. He hadn't meant to make her uncomfortable but what really had he said that was all that bad?

"Are you alright?" he asked again as the black and gold queen displayed intense hesitation and turmoil, "You look troubled"

Demeter just took a heavy breath and directed her eyes to the floor. She knew she had to say something or else Misto would think she was just being rude. Feeling like a moron for thinking of it she simply said what she thought was best,

"Don't worry for now, everything will be clearer soon"

"Is something up?" asked Misto timidly, "Is it something Tugger did? Or Bomba did? Is that why they've gone off together?"

"It's not my place to say. I'm sorry, Misto" she replied and then watched the black and white tom seem to grow more doleful.

"Is it me?" he asked quietly

"What do you mean?"

"Is it me that's made them want to talk alone? Have I done something to annoy either of them? I know Tugger's been a little off lately but I thought that was all finished now. He told me he was worried about us but I was sure I'd put it all to rest."

Demeter closed her eyes and tried as hard as she could not to blurt out what she knew. She could see Misto was skirting around the edge of the actual truth but it seemed that Tugger had left out the exact details of what was really going on – or rather gone on. She shook her head a little as she thought about how amazing it was that Tugger had pulled a veil across what he'd done and told Misto a different story rather than telling him the truth but she knew she couldn't rest all the blame with him. Inside she was just as disappointed in Bomba for playing her part in the ordeal and overall she just felt terrible for the expectant and nervous looking tom before her. He didn't deserve this kind of treatment and the worst part of it was that he had no idea he was involved so deeply in his mate's and Bomba's mess. When he found out his take on life was going to be shaken to its very core and Demeter suddenly became worried for how badly things could turn out for him.

Realising she hadn't said anything in response she quickly shook her head and plucked whatever she could from her busy mind,

"I'm sure you've done nothing wrong, dear. They're probably arguing like they usually do." It wasn't a total lie.

"I'm really worried, Bomba. All I want to do is ease any trouble he's having but I can't do it if he doesn't tell me what's happening with him. Do you think it's me? Am I just not being a good enough mate? How do you and Munk do it?"

"Oh, Misto. You're the cleverest cat around here, I reckon there's no better mate than you; you've got it all figured out it seems. Me and Munk just worked it out as we went along, I suppose, so if there's anything that you've missed I'm sure you'll work it out too and still be leagues ahead of Tugger"

"But that's the thing, Deme, I'm good at magic because I've done it since before I can remember. Getting together with Tugger was the first time I explored that side to me; I didn't know anything and I guess I still don't. They're different types of smartness and it's obvious that being cool and sexy was always Tugger's forte. I always tried my hardest but I was never that good at it and I wonder if maybe me still not being good at it is putting him off. What do you think?"

Demeter felt an even greater sadness well up within her, how could Misto blame himself?

"Tugger adores you, Misto. It's obvious that you're the greatest thing that's ever happened to him and I can promise you that he's never been happier."

Misto paused for a moment, "Do you think I'm sexy enough for him though?"

Demeter had to stifle a giggle as what he had said sounded absolutely hilarious since it was he that was saying it and not somebody else.

"You're plenty sexy. Whatever bothers Tugger I'm pretty sure it would never have anything to do with you. You're doing just fine at being a mate so try not to worry"

Misto sighed, "Easier said than done"

* * *

By now Tugger was fuming and had quickened his pace from a determined march to an agitated power walk and Bomba found it hard to keep up without jogging as she was dragged along. She had tried her absolute best to get him to let her go but his grip on her wrist was like a vice. To her it was incredibly painful but he had no idea of how hard he was holding her. His mind was running at a mile a minute and he was too much of a confused and worried but also angry mess to show the red queen any kind of consideration. Soon they entered the clearing and Tugger locked eyes onto the entrance of the den which he was heading for. As they went Bomba's loud protests roused suspicion from the many Jellicles that congregated in the clearing and Munk jumped to his paws as soon as he detected that something wasn't right. Watching his brother haul Bomba along behind him with her displaying such discontent was certainly not a normal sight and as such he felt he ought to intervene.

"Tugger, what's going on?" he called from his lookout atop the big tyre that was the main focal point of the area. When he received no reply he called again, "Tugger, what are you doing with Bomba? Let her go!" Still no response came and as he continued to watch he saw the maned tom start to pull her up the junk and towards Jenny and Skimble's den. There was no time to become any more involved for as quick as a flash Tugger pulled her up the rest of the way and then threw her through the doorway and out of sight before quickly following her. The many observing cats were left in silent confusion over what they had just seen and anxiously watched the doorway for any signs of movement.

Inside the den Jenny was routinely busying herself with some dusting when a great clattering behind her suddenly interrupted the task. She turned around to be greeted by the sight of Bomba lying on the floor in a heap with a very distraught expression about her. The tabby queen dropped her duster instantly and went to help but before she had time to ask Bomba if she was alright Tugger barged into the den with a look of fury on his face. He was the first to speak – or rather command,

"Tell me if she's pregnant!" he said angrily as he pointed at Bomba while practically breathing fire. Jenny just looked between them confusedly for a few seconds before stepping forward and helping Bomba up. Reaching behind her she plucked a tissue from a box and handed it to the red queen while placing a paw on her arm to comfort her as she sobbed quietly.

"What's going on?" Jenny asked tenderly

"Just tell me if Bomba is pregnant" Tugger said again taking a few seconds before spitting "please". Jenny looked at him and then at her trying to put the pieces together.

"What on earth are you talking about?" asked Jenny sternly as she defied Tugger's commands. She was not a cat that took orders, especially ones from the likes of the Rum Tum Tugger. "You can't just burst in here and start telling me to do this and that! I shan't be doing anything until one of you tells me what on earth is the matter"

Her words elicited another choke from the red queen which made Jenny soften her expression and rub her back gently so as not to appear too threatening.

"Oh, stop your blubbering!" shot Tugger as he watched the display in front of him. The words earned him another stiff glare from Jenny who was trying her best to make Bomba feel better. Turning her attention back to the red queen she spoke softly,

"Don't worry about him, dear. Now, tell me, what's the problem?"

Bomba looked up at her and then glanced at Tugger who gave her the darkest look she had ever seen. With a shiver she started to speak shakily,

"I think I might be pregnant and I was wondering if you could tell me for sure"

Jenny's eyes widened slightly in surprise as she listened to the words and then pressed on,

"Pregnant? What's got you thinking that?"

"I'm late and it's been long enough for me to wonder"

"And Demeter says she can smell it on her" said Tugger angrily cutting in. Another glare from Jenny followed before she started to interrogate him,

"So what about this has got you so flustered?"

"I just need to know now" he said

"And why's that?"

"It's just important"

"Could you have something to do with it if she is pregnant?"

Tugger was silent and the only part of his furious expression that changed was the dropping of his eyes to the ground. It was enough for Jenny to see that she had hit the nail on the head and with a sigh she carried on,

"Oh Tugger..." she said as she shook her head, "What on earth were you thinking? Do you know even how good a catch Mistoffelees is? How could you even consider cheating?"

"It was an accident" Tugger growled lowly

"And there was me thinking that maybe you'd managed to turn over a new leaf. Well, I shouldn't be surprised I suppose; a leopard can't change his spots"

That cut deep in Tugger. The metaphor was very appropriate for him and the worst part of it all was that he actually agreed with her. He too thought that he had actually changed now that he'd mated to Misto but Jenny's jab at him had really hit home that he was no better now than he ever was. It made him even more ashamed of himself.

"Please" he said in a slightly more desperate tone, "Please, just tell me if it's true or not"

Giving him the eye she returned her attention to Bomba for a moment who seemed to beg with her expression for the same thing. Taking a moment to consider it she returned to Tugger and spoke again,

"Wait outside"

"I'd rather not" he responded rudely

"I wasn't asking" she said more challengingly. With a frustrated huff he decided it was best just to get this over with and turned quickly to step out. When he was outside in the cooler night air he took a deep breath and tried to calm himself. It was found to be no use and so instead he tried to mask his fear by fluffing up his mane and trying to look just as sexy as he always did. It was all he could think of to do as he felt the Jellicles' eyes examine him. He made a point of looking straight up into the sky so they couldn't see the terror he harboured within. Inside he was screaming; this had to be untrue. It just had to be.

* * *

Demeter and Misto now sat together at the edge of the small clearing they were in while they chatted about the struggles of having and being a mate. For Demeter it was nice to hear from Misto the same kinds of things she had felt when she had first mated to Munk and she was glad to be sent on a trip through her memory. As Misto went on about how he was glad to have Tugger the conversation was inevitably brought back to the topic at hand and once again Demeter was plunged back into her feeling of lament for Misto. When they both started to grow quiet again Misto picked up on something they both were feeling,

"They've been gone quite a while now, do you think everything's alright?"

"I don't know. I would have thought they might have finished by now"

"Me too. Wait here a sec" said Misto as he got up and ran over to the other side of the clearing. Demeter watched as he climbed the junk and looked out over the top of it in the direction of the trail Tugger had led Bomba down. After a moment he turned and called back,

"I can't see them, maybe they went back"

"Well, do you want to go back too, then?"

Misto shrugged, "I suppose so"

Together they started to walk back towards they main clearing. Unbeknownst to Misto with every step he took he was walking towards a crushing blow that would leave his life in tatters.

* * *

Back in the main clearing Tugger was starting to fidget from his massive frustration and as he attempted to keep his cool the cats that knew him better than the rest noticed he was not doing very well. His attention was seized when he heard a couple of cats approach him and he looked down to find they were Jemima and Victoria. Usually he would have gladly spoken with them but he was in no mood to converse with anyone at this very crucial time. The two queens, however, weren't aware of his strife and proceeded to attempt to talk to him.

"What was all that about, Tug?" asked Jemima, "It looked like you were really hurting her"

"Not now, Jem" he said matter-of-factly and returned his gaze to the stars

""What do you mean? Are you alright?"

"Just busy"

"Where's Misto?" asked Victoria timidly

Tugger closed his eyes and sighed as his heart sank, "I don't know"

"Were you with him before you came here?"

"Um...yeah, sure I was…can you girls just leave me alone for a bit?"

The two queens looked at each other confusedly for a moment before Jemima decided to inquire about his question,

"Leave you alone? Why?"

"I just need you to, alright?"

"Tugger" came Jenny's voice from behind him and he instantly turned to face her. "Come in" she said solemnly before disappearing from view. The maned tom didn't waste time in following her in but once he was there he knew instantly that he probably should have taken his time. He could see Bomba looked even worse now and the way Jenny had sounded a moment ago was probably all he needed to hear. Still, he waited in silent terror for her verdict.

"Tugger, sit down" said Jenny gently as she gestured towards a place for him

"I'm fine" he replied with less anger than before, "Just tell me what you think"

Looking between them for a few seconds Jenny sighed and begrudgingly began her explanation,

"Well, what you both need to understand is that although I've been able to tell this sort of thing for a long time now there are still occasions when I could be wrong. It's not very likely but even so it's possible. Secondly, you must understand the magnitude of this situation. It's not something you can take lightly and I'm sure now you realize just how badly things can turn out when accidents like this occur. On top of that there's-"

"Jenny" cut in Tugger, "Please don't beat around the bush. Just tell me…" he took a steady breath and closed his eyes, "…is she pregnant?"

There was a silent pause that to Tugger seemed like a thousand years of dreadful anticipation. His heart pounded and he could practically hear Jenny take her breath to deliver her horrible answer,

"Yes"

And that was it. That was the moment that Tugger knew his life was over. Instantly the love and trust he felt coming from Misto when he thought about him started crumbling and raining down in flames and he suddenly didn't feel like the cat he knew himself to be. He felt ugly and shameful and he simply felt he'd rather die than bear being cast away by Misto. The thought of his mate threw him to another extreme and straight away he started to grow deathly scared about losing him. What if Misto hated him? How could he live knowing the one cat in the world that he truly adored and practically lived for loathed him? Then again, how could Misto not hate him? He'd made pregnant the queen that had very nearly succeeded in splitting them apart. If Misto didn't hate him then surely there was something wrong with him.

The information was almost too much to contend with and Tugger brought his paws to his face balling them against his eyes and swaying on his legs in a flurry of anguish and shame. The two queens watched him as he started to moan the word 'No' over and over again into his paws and then turn to face in the opposite direction. He was so incredibly scared and angry with himself that he started to lash out and began to punch and thrash at the wall of the den nearest to him with his fists making pieces of junk that composed it start to fall down.

"Tugger, stop it! You'll bring the whole place down!" said Jenny firmly but with a noticeable sympathy. She could see this was too much for Tugger and knew that any emotion he was feeling was going to be an extreme. Unfortunately for all of them that emotion was turning exclusively towards anger from the sheer confusion of the situation and when Tugger turned back around the first thing he saw was Bomba sitting across the den from him looking absolutely pitiful. At that moment he felt a searing hatred towards her and practically wanted to kill her for what she represented. She was the one cat in existence that now stood in the way of him and Misto with no chance of moving from that place any time soon. Feeling as if he couldn't contain his rage he started to speak fiercely,

"Did you fucking plan this?"

Bomba just looked back at him in forlorn surprise. Was he actually suggesting that her becoming pregnant was part of some scheme to win him back? She couldn't get a word in before he carried on – this time as furious shouting.

"You fucking planned this didn't you! You waited until I was drunk to snare me when you knew I wouldn't realise I was doing something wrong so you could get yourself pregnant and break me and Misto up! That's it, isn't it? Your first plan didn't work so you had to go to more extreme measures! What kind of twisted bitch are you, Bomba? I was perfectly happy with Misto but you got so jealous you couldn't just leave us be, could you?"

Bomba felt atrocious about the situation but she wasn't about to let Tugger actually suggest she had planned this, least of all as a way to steal him from Misto.

"Planned it? You think I want your bloody kittens? You think I want to steal you from Misto? Are you that stupid, Tugger?" Her voiced started to crack as her attempt at anger faltered into just becoming more upset. "I was perfectly happy getting along without you and I was glad that you had found Misto. How can you be so stupid as to believe that I wanted to get pregnant so I could split you two up?"

"Well, it's just like you, isn't it? Always doing something devious to get your own way!"

"Shut up, Tugger!" she tried to shout, "If you weren't such a tomwhore I wouldn't be in this damn mess right now!"

"Me? You actually think this is my fault?"

"Well, it's not the first time you've gotten drunk and landed yourself in some kind of trouble. This really takes the cake though"

Tugger didn't know what to believe as his mind constantly jumped from one feeling to the next. Altogether he was just too mixed up to stop himself from tipping over the edge. With fire in his eyes he went for Bomba and was determined to put her in her place. Jenny, however, mistook his advance for an attack and to her it seemed she stepped in just when he was within inches of clawing at Bomba. Struggling to keep Tugger back she started shrieking,

"Tugger, stop it! Get out! Now!"

The maned tom was on the brink of exploding with frustration and guilt and ignored Jenny's shouting as he tried to push past her. The tabby queen proved stronger than she looked as she held back Bomba as well who displayed a similar expression of hatred and a desire to fight the tom that had made her pregnant. The tabby queen continued yelling,

"Stop it, the pair of you! I will not have anyone fighting in my den so the two of you will calm down right now!"

Reluctantly the fuming cats backed off but didn't loose any of their rage. Once she was able to stop holding them apart Jenny gave them one final command,

"Get out, you two! And don't you dare lay a finger on each other!"

Angrily, Tugger stomped out of the den before Bomba and once outside he jumped down from the junk, turned and waited for her to emerge. There were a few seconds pause but sure enough the red queen came out of Jenny's den with a despondent look on her face. She clearly had no idea of what to do now and that was surely taking hold of her over her desire to scuffle with Tugger. She may have been angry but the thought of being pregnant under such terrible circumstances was crushing and all she wanted to do was find Demeter and cry. Tugger had other plans though, he was so mixed up that all he wanted to do was take his rage out on something and at that moment Bomba seemed the most appropriate option.

"You shouldn't have let this happen!" he said in a quieter but just as fiery voice as he eyed her up, "You should have been good enough to keep this from ever happening!"

"Just leave me alone, Tugger" Bomba replied sadly, "I don't want to be near you right now"

"It's mutual, you horrible bitch!"

"Then just let me past"

"No! I'm not finished with you yet so you're gonna stand there and listen"

"I'm leaving" she said before Tugger grabbed her arm and pulled on it firmly

"Here's the first thing!" he said as he raised his paw above him and unsheathed his claws which seemed to shine in the moonlight. It was only meant to be a threat but to Bomba it was terrifying. The queen's expression instantly changed to one of terrible fear and she tried to pull away as she thought Tugger was going to slash at her.

"Tugger, no!" she screamed as he held her menacingly. How could he have gone this crazy? How can he possibly think this was going to solve anything?

As the rest of the tribe looked on in shock Tugger went to bring his claws down since he felt he'd gotten the message across. His arm hadn't made it very far before it was grabbed from behind by Munk who had flown across the clearing as soon as Tugger had grabbed Bomba and in a few quick movements he pulled his brother off of her and threw him to the ground. Tugger had no time to protest before Munk was on his back and had completely immobilized him causing him to yell and thrash as he tried to pull himself free. Bomba stood in shock for a moment before she snapped herself out of it and pelted away from the clearing. Tugger was left on the cold clearing floor with Munk pinning him firmly down with the rest of the Jellicles looking on in amazement.

"Alonzo! Plato! Help!" yelled Munk as he struggled with Tugger beneath him. The two toms he'd called instantly rushed across and jumped on top of the pile making sure Tugger was well and truly pinned.

"Get off me, you bastards!" shouted Tugger from below but it was no use. As soon as he paused his thrashing the toms pulled him up and started to frog-march him across the clearing towards his den. Tugger protested but became less enthusiastic as he felt the eyes of the Jellicles scour and judge him from where they sat. It was only now that he realized what he must have looked like and if he didn't feel enough shame before he certainly felt too much now. Reluctantly he started to comply with the toms that pushed him across the clearing and even climbed the junk himself when they approached the doorway to his den. Shaking them off he stepped inside by himself closely followed by only his brother.

No sooner had they gone in, Misto and Demeter appeared at the edge of the clearing and quietly started to cross it. Within moments they started to feel the tension in the air and instead of asking straight away they quietly looked at each other and parted ways to find their respective friends.

Demeter went across to the queens and spoke with them quickly. When she was updated with everything that had happened with Tugger and Bomba she looked less surprised than the queens expected and straight away took off in the direction Bomba had left in.

Misto didn't see Demeter leave as he was too engrossed in being told what had happened by Victoria and Jemima.

"He was going to strike her?" he asked, "Why?"

"We don't know" replied the patterned queen, "He just looked crazy; I've never seen him like that before, ever."

"And he had to be pulled off of her?"

"By Munk, Alonzo and Plato" said Victoria, "Then they dragged him to your den"

"Is that where he is right now?"

The two nodded.

"I…I guess I should go and see him"

"Do you want to give him a minute to calm down?"

"I don't think it matters unless he's angry with me"

"Do you think he might be?"

"No…I don't think so"

The queens looked at each other, "You don't think so?"

Misto sighed, "He's been acting really strangely recently, not like the Tugger I know. I've been wondering whether it's something I've done. He says it's not but I just don't know anymore…"

There was a brief silence before Jemima spoke up, "You had best go and talk to him then. Make him tell you what's wrong no matter what it takes"

"I'll give it my best shot" said Misto as he rose to return to his den.

* * *

"What in Heaviside do you think you were doing?" asked Munk angrily

"Just leave me alone, Munk, I don't need to be around anyone right now" replied Tugger as he stomped around the den.

"Well, I can't very well forget this, Tug. You nearly hit Bomba!"

"I was never going to hurt her"

"Well it certainly looked like you were going to"

"Well, I wasn't"

"And how am I meant to believe that?"

"It's the truth. Believe it if you want, I don't care"

Munk stared him firmly for a moment looking just like his father – a look Tugger hated him imitating.

"Don't do that!" spat Tugger

"What?"

"Stop trying to look like dad!"

"I'm not"

"Yes you are"

"I'm just looking at you"

"You're trying to be all high and mighty, give it a rest"

"Everlasting, Tugger! Will you just calm down?"

Tugger just yelled and turned around in a huff. He flopped down on his bed and in a few moments curled up as tight as he could. His sudden change in expression was very peculiar to watch and Munk knew his brother too well to miss the fact that he was incredibly troubled. Tugger was well and truly in despair; what was he going to do? Bomba was pregnant and in no time at all she was going to have kittens. His kittens. How was Misto ever going to forgive him?

Munk watched him as he seemed to try and hide himself from the rest of the world and slowly walked towards him a few paces.

"Tug?" he asked mildly

"Mmm?"

"What's wrong?"

Tugger laboured to sit up and turned to his brother with his head down. He needed some advice but what was there that anyone could tell him that he didn't already know?

"It's none of your concern" he said in a gravely voice

"You know you can tell me anything, right?"

Tugger looked up at him with a great sadness in his eyes and decided just to tell him. He needed to tell someone so it may as be Munk.

"I got Bomba pregnant" he said shamefully.

Munk just looked at him with surprise and his silence let Tugger know just how big a deal this was. Hours seemed to pass without either of them saying anything before Munk managed some words,

"You slept with her?"

"It was an accident. It was the night we all went out a few weeks ago and we got too drunk to realize what we were doing"

Munk closed his eyes and exhaled, "You know, it was always gonna come back and bite you one day"

"You're not helping" growled Tugger

"What were you thinking?"

"We weren't thinking"

"I guess that's why you nearly tore Bomba a new one then?"

"I wasn't going to hurt her, but yeah. Jenny confirmed it"

"Oh Everlasting…" said Munk as he turned away in mild disgust. He always knew his brother was stupid but this had seemed beyond even him. "What are you going to do?"

Tugger shook his head slowly, "I don't know"

"You need to tell Misto" said Munk turning back around

"I just don't know if I can"

"It's better he hears it from you instead of on the grapevine. He'll find out eventually when Bomba starts to get bigger so you best tell him now"

"I can't though, it would kill him"

"What would kill who?" came a voice at the doorway. The two brothers looked up to see Misto timidly entering the den with big, expectant eyes. Munk looked back at Tugger and simply said, "You have to". Tugger begged with his expression and seemed to silently scream, "I can't". Munk's response was simply to give him a steely look that could have either been a threat or a gesture of courage and upon that he started to walk to the door stopping at Misto's side as he passed him to give him a pitying look. Misto wondered what on earth was going on as his protector looked at him in that way and then left without saying another word. Turning his attention to Tugger he instantly knew something was wrong by the way his mate looked back at him. Tugger looked like he was on the verge of tears as he gazed and Misto didn't really know what to do. As the black and white tom started to walk towards him Tugger looked down at his paws and then flinched when Misto placed his paw on his arm. Tugger looked up into Misto's beautiful blue eyes and waited for him to speak. The tom just stared back and in a tender voice spoke again,

"Tugger, for the last time, please just tell me what's wrong?"

A tear slipped from the bigger tom's eye as the inevitable moment when he had to crush Misto landed in his lap. In a way he knew this was always going to have to happen and the only way he could think of to begin was,

"I'm sorry, Misto. I'm so, so sorry…"

**Poor Misto! How is he going to react?**

**Hope this chapter wasn't boring, the juicy stuff starts happening from this point on.**

**Thanks for reading, if you have time to review then by all means have at it. **


	9. The Sparkling Trail

**Right then, time for some bad stuff to go down. At least Tugger is finally stepping up. **

**Misto's life is up-heaved by a startling revelation.**

**Read the first section slowly, it might sink in a bit better.**

**As I've said before, I don't write the way Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer speak phonetically. It's hard to read so just imagine their thick, cockney accents.**

**WARNING: Misto drops an F-Bomb (lol)**

**Love Is No Fairytale**

**Chapter 9**

**The Sparkling Trail**

There had been many times in Misto's life when he'd been severely put on edge. When he'd first discovered his magic he had felt incredibly scared. It seemed to him that perhaps he was evaporating a little every time he used it and had been very nervous until he'd been told it was natural. When he had first fallen in love with Tugger had been a scary moment although it wasn't one which had made him afraid. It had been a good kind of scary and even though he had been nervous there was nothing more that he wanted than to dive right in and bask in its warmth. Now that Misto stood before Tugger watching him go to pieces and tell him profusely that he was sorry struck fear into his heart and he really did not like listening to Tugger speak in the way that he did. It was a desperate begging that let Misto know that something was incredibly wrong and that it affected him with some kind of grave ominousness. Standing watching, he wasn't sure if he was ready for it whatever it was and almost regretted asking Tugger for the final time to just tell him what was the matter.

Taking a few moments to watch his mate gather his courage he spoke up once more,

"Tugger, tell me what's wrong"

Feebly, Tugger reached out and took Misto's paw in his. He brought it to his mouth and kissed it softly before pressing it to his cheek for comfort. Tugger didn't know if Misto would ever let him touch him after he revealed his secret and he needed one more moment to experience the beautiful little tom's warm touch. It was a feeling that always gave him strength and allowed him to feel loved and if there was anything he needed at that moment, that was it.

The feeling, however, seemed to be growing ever more distant and in the place where it had always nested in Tugger's heart now grew a feeling of coldness which seemed to stand for sheer desperation. Slowly Tugger opened his eyes and looked up to meet Misto's. The longing for clarity he saw in them only made him want to wish the situation away even more but he knew there was no backing out now. He knew he could tell a lie and he came very close to deciding to do so but in the end he knew that the more truth he withheld from Misto the bigger the blow would be when he had to finally tell him. With a shaky breath he brought Misto's paw down to his lap and held it there tightly as he prepared himself to tell him the truth.

"Misto…" he breathed before taking a brief pause. "…I need you to know that I love you. You understand that, right?"

"Of course" said Misto warily

"No, really, I love you more than anything"

Misto gave him a weak smile and spoke more definitely, "I know, Tug, I really love you too"

This was it for Tugger, "There's a reason I've been acting so strangely recently. The night I took us all out you'll remember we had a lot to drink."

"Yes"

"Well, I had to help Bomba home that night because otherwise she wouldn't have made it"

"Okay"

"I managed to put her in bed but for some reason I stayed a while"

"The whole night"

Tugger nodded slowly, "I wasn't going to stay the whole night but there was a reason I did."

Misto started to feel even more nervous now as Tugger got closer and closer to the issue at hand. Tugger saying there was a reason he stayed with Bomba that night did not at all sound good and he swallowed hard as he waited for the maned tom to continue.

"I fell asleep…"

"Because you were drunk?" asked Misto timidly

"Not exactly…I was with Bomba in her den and…well, somehow one thing led to another…"

Misto's eyes widened as he cottoned on to what he thought Tugger was trying to say. As a swarm of butterflies seemed to fill his stomach he shakily asked,

"And?"

Tugger looked down in shame, "…I'm sorry Misto…"

"What did you do?" asked the black and white tom with urgency and a growing amount of hurt – as if he really needed to ask Tugger what he had done.

"…we slept together"

When Tugger heard nothing but silence he apprehensively looked up to see how his mate looked. The sight was truly heart-breaking for Misto stood stock-still in front of him with a look of misunderstanding but also unimaginable hurt. His paw was extended a small way in front of him held paralyzed in mid-air as if he had gone limp right after Tugger had told him what he'd done but then tensed up.

A few seconds passed with neither one saying anything and as Tugger looked on at Misto he noticed that the smaller tom didn't seem to move a muscle. Perhaps it was the shock of the revelation or a misunderstanding of what Tugger had said but something seemed to have gripped Misto and was holding him there without letting go. Eventually Misto brought his paw back down to his side and averted his stare from Tugger slightly to the left. Tugger watched as Misto seemed to visibly grow smaller and bring his arm up to grab his opposing elbow. The smaller tom rubbed at the spot nervously as he looked to the side and Tugger could tell he had no idea how to respond. Gingerly the maned tom decided to break the silence,

"Misto?"

The smaller tom looked him in the eyes and instantly Tugger could see they were filling quickly and on the very brink of spilling tears as his bottom lip quivered slightly below.

"Misto, I'm so sorry. I never meant for it to happen; it was a complete accident and I never wanted to hurt you. I'm so, so sorry"

There was another long pause with the emotion in the air growing thicker than treacle. After a long time had passed Misto sniffed slightly and Tugger could hear him breath out quietly but constricted. It seemed Misto was trying his absolute hardest not to cry but was having serious trouble in doing so. The sound of his attempt at it cut through Tugger and he hated himself for having obviously hurt his mate so badly. Reluctantly he decided he had to press on as he was not done yet,

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you when it happened, I just couldn't do it. At first I didn't believe it but it did happen and I'd give anything to take it back. I didn't know how to tell you and I know there's no easy way of saying it. I'm just so sorry I did this, Misto, I really am"

Looking down slightly Misto nodded very, very gently and sniffed once more. Opening his eyes and swallowing the huge lump in his throat he opened his mouth to speak. The words which came out were cracked and breathy and were tangled in sheer hurt,

"I don't understand"

"What don't you understand?" Tugger asked in a low voice

"How did you…I mean, how could you…"

"I don't know. We were both really drunk and we had no idea what was going on. It wasn't until morning we realized we'd done anything wrong and we regret it so much"

"But you still did it…" whispered Misto straining not to choke on the words

Tugger was having trouble not to break down himself but he knew he had to stay strong if he wanted Misto to see he was being genuine.

"I did, and I'm so sorry"

"Well, she is very pretty…" muttered Misto as timidly as a mouse, "I mean, I see why you like her. I know I'm not as nice as her but…I…"

"Misto, please!" Tugger begged, "That's got nothing to do with it and even if it did you're wrong. You're a thousand times as beautiful as she is, she's got nothing on you"

With fleeting explanations rapidly falling away Misto was left completely clueless as to how this could have happened.

"Then…why?" he breathed as his silvery tears sparkled on his cheeks

"It was just an accident, it shouldn't have happened"

"But…how was it an accident?"

"We were drunk"

"But you still must have known what you were doing"

Tugger grimaced with shame, "I don't know how to answer that. All I know is I wish it had never happened and I'm so sorry and I love you and…"

There was yet another pause and Misto looked up to ask him, "And?"

"…There's one more thing"

"Oh Everlasting Cat…" blurted Misto as he strained to keep in the sobs which tried to explode from him as soon as Tugger had spoken. He really didn't feel he could take any more.

"About twenty minutes ago when Bomba came to find me I went with her to Jenny so we could confirm it for sure"

Misto's face screwed up a tiny bit as he waited for the final blow and even more tears welled up started to spill over. With a deep breath Tugger delivered it,

"She's pregnant"

Misto instantly brought a paw to his mouth and screwed his eyes up tight as his body racked with the sobs he forced to keep inside himself. His tail now hung limply on the floor behind him as his entire body seemed to droop with the sadness he felt within. How could Tugger have done this? How could he have slept with someone else and more importantly what did that mean? Whose fault was it? Sure, Tugger had slept with Bomba but had he done it because Misto wasn't good enough? Was it because he wasn't as good as Bomba? Was Tugger bored with him? Did Tugger even love him much anymore?

As the flurry of questions filled his mind like butterflies caught in a net he looked back at Tugger and tried to say something. As soon as he took his paw away from his mouth he realized the sobs were becoming too strong to keep in and he instantly brought both paws back up to his face and buried himself in them. Was he meant to be this sad? Was he meant to be angry? Was he meant to understand? He didn't know. All he did know was that his mate – the one cat in the whole world that he loved more than anything and who he thought loved him in return – had slept with someone else and made her pregnant. That meant she would be having his kittens. That meant Tugger and Bomba would be parents and he himself would be left in the sidelines. That meant he would never be the one cat that mattered to Tugger anymore.

All of this together hurt Misto, and it hurt a lot. Never before had he felt so crushed and the fact that it was his mate that had inflicted this pain on him made it all the more devastating. The pain itself grew stronger with every second that passed and Misto felt it burning inside him as it seemed to symbolize the rejection he felt coming from Tugger despite what he said to the contrary. The second Tugger had slept with Bomba - in Misto's mind – he had rejected him and the smaller tom at that moment had never felt worse in his life.

Tugger felt awful for putting his mate in this state. He had well and truly crushed Misto and he could see it in the little tux's reaction. He wanted to do something to help him, anything to comfort him and in a moment of madness he stepped forward and took Misto's paws in his. The little tom looked up at him with despondency and his mouth hanging open slightly in disbelief and the sight was absolutely heart-wrenching for Tugger.

"I'm sorry Misto. I love you so much and I'm so, so sorry"

Ignorantly he started to nuzzle Misto's forehead with his own and the smaller tom just closed is eyes and stood there unmoving as Tugger tried to comfort him. Tugger was at a loss for direction so he then brought his mouth in line with his mate's. Leaning forward he went in to kiss the tux and their lips grazed together lightly before Misto flinched, took a sharp breath and turned his head to the side slightly leaving Tugger's lips to end up just to the side of his mouth. The feeling Misto usually got from kissing Tugger was no longer there; he no longer felt the tiny tingle that sparked between them when their lips met and in place of the warmth and love that came with it was a cold, unfamiliar emptiness that didn't remind him in any way of the cat he'd fallen in love with. The cat that tried to kiss him was a stranger and he didn't kiss strangers; at that moment he wanted Tugger, but Tugger wasn't there.

Realising he'd done wrong the maned tom slowly pulled away and let Misto go while taking a step back. Without looking at him Misto stepped around Tugger and walked labouredly over to the bed before silently lying down facing away from him and bringing his knees up to his chest. His heart had been broken and he simply didn't move after that apart from the shallow, shaky breaths that Tugger could see as he watched him for a good long while.

"I love you, Misto, please love me still"

No response came and Tugger started to wonder what was going to happen now all the while feeling stupid for saying that. How could he ask Misto to still love him and expect him to just do so? What was he supposed to do? Should he lay down with Misto and hug him? Should he leave to give Misto some time alone with his thoughts? What should he even say?

As the maned tom pondered he quickly came to the realisation that he had absolutely no idea what to do and eventually decided to sit on the edge of the bed. Turning he looked over at Misto and reached out a paw to touch him. As he made the lightest of contact the smaller tom flinched again and seemed to recoil in fright. Turning back around Tugger just sat there and looked ahead. Across the den he could see himself in a mirror and what he saw he found repulsive. Staring back at him was a cat that had done something terrible even by his standards and he didn't like the look of it. Taking in his features he looked at his mane, his leopard spots and his sleek black fur and found that no matter how good they were his looks could do nothing to help him. He knew he'd found something higher in Misto and now that he'd broken that bond he had no idea what to do. In defeat he placed his head in his paws. As he listened to Misto gently breathe behind him in near silence he sat and wallowed in the misery and shame that he knew he so rightly deserved. The worst part was that he knew whatever he was feeling Misto felt too only hundreds of times worse.

* * *

Outside in the junkyard Jenny had by now left her den in a solemn quietness and made her way over to Jellylorum who listened in amazement as Jenny told her the events that had gone on during her evening.

"You mean she's well and truly pregnant?" the yellow queen asked

"Positive" the tabby queen replied

"I can't believe it. How could he do that knowing Misto was barely fifty feet away?"

Jenny shook her head, "I don't know. It's terrible"

"Do you think he's told Misto?"

"I doubt it, he doesn't have the spine. I really don't know what Misto sees in him"

"Maybe what the kittens see?"

Jenny sighed, "I hope he has more solidarity than that. He's always been so clever and has always been able to see the wonder in things, I hope he didn't just get caught up in Tugger's…image"

"Do you think he saw something in Tugger that we all missed?"

"Think about what's going on, dear, what you see is what you get with Tugger and I hope Misto will be able to see that soon"

"Well, he did seem to change when they got together. Maybe we're all judging Tugger by what he's been like in the past"

"As I said, now that he's done this I don't think we can really wonder about that"

"Hmm…" sighed Jelly, "I still can't believe he got her pregnant. Poor Bomba having to carry Tugger's kitten where everyone can see"

"Tugger made Bomba pregnant?" came a loud, cockney voice from behind the pair. They instantly spun their heads around to land their sight on none other than Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer who it seemed had been so covertly eavesdropping on their conversation.

"Mungojerrie!" shrieked Jenny, "It is not polite to listen in on what other cats are talking about!"

"Never mind about that!" said Rumple from behind Mungo, "Bomba's pregnant! How long has that been?"

"None of your business" said Jenny firmly, "Go on, get out of here, and don't you dare tell anyone what you heard"

The pair of acrobats just slunk off uncharacteristically quietly in surprise over the information they had just stumbled upon. This was huge news and being the type of cats they were they were not about to obey Jenny and keep it to themselves. It wasn't long before the message was making its way around the junkyard.

* * *

Demeter found Bomba sitting alone in the clearing she had been in with Misto earlier. She approached quietly meaning Bomba did not hear her coming and the black and gold queen watched as her friend cried quietly to herself over the awful situation she had been thrown into. Bomba didn't know why this had happened to her; she had thought she had put Tugger behind her and she was happy he had found someone he loved. What's more she was glad she could move on as well as he had treated her like dirt all the time they had been together. Before they'd had sex there even seemed to be some kind of smoother atmosphere hanging around but now that had all gone down the pan. She was pregnant with Tugger's kitten and that meant her life now was no longer her own. It meant she would now have to raise a kitten she had never wanted and she knew that the kitten and she would be looked down upon by the entire junkyard. The growing kitten inside her would always be a symbol of Tugger being a sleazy cheat, she being a slut and the reason for whatever was going to happen with Tugger and Misto which was surely going to be bad. To Bomba it seemed that it simply could not get any worse and she felt as if she had nowhere else to turn. She was alone now; who would want to talk to her?

This fear was put to the test when she heard a shuffling nearby and she looked up to see the face of her dearest and closest friend. Sniffing sadly, she stood up and looked at Demeter without saying anything. The two queens stared at each other for a long moment before Demeter's blank expression faltered into one of sympathy and she walked forward to hug her friend. Bomba took a moment to take in the acceptance Demeter showed her and as soon as it hit her she sobbed into the black and gold queen's fur as she wrapped her arms around her.

"Deme, what am I going to do?" she wept

"Shh," hushed Demeter, "we'll decide that later. For now let me make sure you're alright"

"Thank you" said Bomba as her sobs became a little quieter. Through all of the hate she felt towards herself at that moment it was a breath of fresh air to feel the warmth of their eternal friendship.

A little while later the two queens parted and sat down together in quiet discussion over where to go from that point on.

* * *

It seemed hours had passed since either Misto or Tugger had said anything to each other. Misto had remained laying stock-still on the bed and when Tugger looked at him he only saw the tux's sleek black back facing him. It was unclear what was going through the tom's mind as his expression was utterly unfathomable from Tugger's point of view and not knowing this was driving him insane. He wanted somehow to tell Misto it was going to be okay but he simply couldn't think of the words through the shame he felt for making him so unhappy. That was even if he knew it was actually going to be okay as it wasn't known how Misto was going to react regarding whether or not they could get past this. Tugger could try as hard as he could but in the end the fate of their relationship lay in Misto's paws.

Misto had barely said anything other than the fleeting questions from his lack of understanding when Tugger had first told him and since then he had seemed to spiral downwards to where he was now: a silent, unmoving cat that lay curled up in misery. Tugger knew it was his fault and he wished he knew how to fix it.

More time passed and eventually the waiting for Misto to do anything pushed Tugger to breaking point. Turning around he timidly reached across and made very gentle contact with his mate's shoulder. Misto didn't flinch this time as he had before, he simply didn't move and Tugger found himself waiting for a few moments to see if he would.

"Misto?" he asked very gently, "Please, Misto…"

Still the tux did not move.

"Misto, please just talk to me. Do anything, yell at me, scream at me, hit me, just please do something"

Still nothing. Tugger looked down in defeat, he'd really broken his tom and he had no idea how he could possibly bring back the bright, bubbly Misto he'd had not that long ago.

"Misto, I'm sorry" he said pleadingly, "I'm so sorry I hurt you like this. I'll do anything you want me to do to make it better. Anything."

At that Misto tilted his head slightly making Tugger perk up in anticipation. Very slowly the tux turned his head around to look at Tugger directly. His expression seemed completely blank aside from a deep, unfathomable look in his eyes that were no longer as bright as Tugger remembered and seemed to show a complete loss for clear thought behind them. When he spoke his voice was quiet but firm yet without emotion,

"To make it better…"

Tugger responded desperately,

"Anything it takes, anything at all, darling"

Misto sat up and moved his legs over to the side of the bed and sat on the edge while looking slightly downward as if he were lost in thought. Tugger listened intently as he waited for him to respond and as he watched he saw Misto take a big, slow breath before exhaling it and then tilting his head from side to side to relieve some tension. Unexpectedly he said, "I need some air" and got up to slowly walk across the den towards the door. Tugger was instantly a step behind him and kept his eyes firmly on the tux as he stepped out into the night air.

What happened next for Misto really put into perspective just what a mess his life now was.

As he stepped into the cooler environment he took in a deep breath to try and clear his head. There was so much going on within him that he was trying to make sense of that none of it really registered on the outside and this is what made the Jellicles that noticed him so confused. They assumed that when Tugger had told him what they thought he had due to the rumour that had found its way around to everyone he would be at least showing something, but there he was looking incredibly normal – if not a little tired - and this only made them stare more. When Misto opened his eyes to look around he started to notice pair after pair of eyes fixated on his person and all of a sudden he began to feel a twinge of fear. It wasn't just fear though, it was hurt and shame and a sense of dirtiness as if he had been marked in a way that let the tribe know to look down upon him and regard him with disgust despite them not openly showing it. That was how he felt and as he started to walk forward and step down from the junk he felt like each pair of eyes watching him were all silently making the same judgement as if to say 'That's him. That's the cat that whose mate made someone else pregnant. His mate must never really have loved him, he must not be worthy of that much love'.

Although Misto should have known the reason the junkyard was in silence was because nobody knew what they ought to do or say he still felt as if they were silently cursing him and even though he tried to walk on it was as if something was pulling him back. Stopping in the middle of the clearing he looked up and made eye contact with cats he thought he knew so well; he looked at Jenny who seemed to have such incredible pity for him, he looked at Skimble who seemed to mirror his mate, he looked at Jelly who had a very intent expression and he looked at Mungojerrie who seemed to stare at him dumbfounded but with coarseness. He kept looking around at each of them and finally he looked at Jemima and Victoria who looked very upset for him despite managing to keep it all inside. All of their gazes seemed like spears aimed at him ready to strike at any moment and quickly a nasty thought popped into his mind: Tugger hadn't only snuck off and made Bomba pregnant, he'd branded Misto as his reject and the feeling suddenly brought back all of the pain and hurt he'd felt the last time the tribe had turned against him. That had been a misunderstanding, this – though different – felt like true disgust. The small tom turned around to look at Tugger who was still standing up on the junk looking back at him. He could tell exactly what Misto was thinking and was too ashamed of himself to form the words necessary to try and tell him he thought wrong. As the feeling of hatred grew and started to swirl around inside of Misto he began to feel a new feeling that up until this point had been waiting patiently to take hold of him. It was the hurt that had gripped him before but now it was mixed well with anger and as the seconds ticked on he started to hate the cat that looked back at him – or at least hate him as much as he could manage; even though he was angry he still for some reason felt he loved Tugger and couldn't hate him entirely; this is what frustrated him so much. The anger soon turned to fury and he simply had no idea what to do with himself. In a fit of rage he charged at Tugger and pushed him as hard as he could although due to their difference in size Tugger only staggered back and didn't fall down. Misto didn't stop there, he started pummelling Tugger's chest with his fists however it wasn't really enough to hurt him. Despite how much Misto wanted to beat Tugger he just couldn't bear to do it and simply stood there struggling to let out his frustration with the maned tom. As he continued to thump his mate he started to cry hysterically and soon his swipes became weaker. In exasperation his knees buckled and Tugger caught him as he started to fall clutching him to his chest as the smaller tom ceased his hitting and just cried into his fur. Through his loud moans of misery he yelled at Tugger,

"How could you do it? How could you do this to me? I loved you so much! How could I not have been good enough for you?"

Tugger just held him firmly and sobbed a little himself. Misto was right and absolutely deserved to be furious with him. Tugger knew it was his duty to stand there and take whatever the little tom had to throw at him, after all it was the least he could do to make things better and he knew it. As Misto hung there limp at the knees Tugger tried to speak to him,

"I'm sorry Misto, I'm so s-"

"No!" shouted the tux bolting up and pushing Tugger angrily, "Don't touch me! Don't fucking come near me!"

Tugger was shocked. Never in his life had he ever heard Misto say a word nearly as bad as that as he was absolutely stunned that his mate actually had it in him. As a result he simply looked at Misto wide-eyed as did the rest of the tribe as they watched the tux vent his rage.

Just as Misto was gearing himself up to yell at Tugger again his eye was caught by movement at the edge of the clearing. He turned to look at what it was that entered and he stopped dead in his tracks when he saw it was Demeter and Bomba coming back from somewhere. Now that he could see the cat that Tugger had used in his act of rejection he suddenly felt very small and meek. Instantly he started to shake from the violent reaction between his anger and his fear and it wasn't long before that anger fizzled out into a feeling of sheer fright.

Quickly, he spun his head back around to Tugger and then back to Bomba who stared back at him apologetically. As soon as she had entered the clearing and seen Misto shouting and crying she knew instantly what had happened and straight away she felt incredibly guilty. When she made eye contact with Misto there was a brief moment where she felt lower than low as the tom seemed to beg the question with his eyes: 'Why?'

It was all too much for Misto to handle and he simply couldn't bear to be around anyone anymore. Taking one last look at Tugger he started to cry again and then began to sprint in the direction of the entrance to the junkyard.

"Misto! Wait!" shouted Tugger as he started to chase after him. Many of the Jellicles jumped to their feet as Misto ran past and out of the yard and they all watched sadly as both he and Tugger disappeared from their view.

Misto was really fast, much faster than Tugger and the bigger tom had trouble keeping up with him. He continued to yell after the tux but once he had rounded a few corners Misto was nowhere to be seen.

"Misto!" shouted Tugger into the empty, black night hoping desperately for any indication of where his despondent little mate might have gone. The response was only silence and Tugger was left alone under the stale, orange glow of a streetlamp with only the terror of knowing that Misto was out there all alone as company. His mate was all on his own, utterly helpless and it ripped Tugger's heart to shreds.

Secretly Misto watched him from the other side of the street but had quickly thought to use his magic to disappear. Feeling nothing but hurt he turned from looking at Tugger and then started to run off into the night with no idea of where he was going and feeling as if there were no one left for him in the world. The feeling was crushing and as he ran his silvery tears ran off of his cheeks and landed on the pavement behind him. They left a small, sparkling trail that soon faded into nothing just like the love he used to feel from Tugger.

It would be weeks before anyone saw him again.

**Oh no! Misto's all alone in the dark! Anything could happen to him! Tugger can be such a bastard sometimes, let's hope he can find his tom.**

**Is the a review you've got? Quick! Click below and write it down! x**


	10. The Dirty Little Pouch

**CrazyIndigoChild: Shizit! LOL!**

**mistotugger: Sorry 'bout that although I find it very flattering!**

**HumanGuineapig: Thanks! I was worried his angsty bits weren't gonna come across so its nice to know that I'm conveying something or other.**

**Shiona Acitui: Yeah, Tugger's sorry but I'm not sure that's good enough for Misto. Heaven knows what that tux will do in this state.**

**So, Griddlebone. I know who she is and stuff but is she just about in Gus's 'recalling his Growltiger days' as a figure of his memory or is she a Jellicle as much as the rest of them who just doesn't appear at any other time? I always used to think the former but now having given it a bit more thought and reading some of your lovely stories I'm reconsidering. What do you lot think?**

**Also, I think I made Misto seem overly drippy in this one but I was trying to convey just how upset he is. You know when you feel so terrible that you just can't stop crying? I wanted that, I hope it comes across.**

**Love Is No Fairytale**

**Chapter 10**

**The Dirty Little Pouch**

In the days that had passed since Misto ran away he had begun to spiral downwards into his pit of misery. It felt like a giant chunk had been ripped out of him and what was horrible was that he didn't understand why. Upon running from Tugger he had run without knowing where he was going and simply followed the streets until he found he was well and truly lost. He didn't care though, he just wanted to be away from everyone, a choice he'd soon find not to be ideal. As the day broke his tears ran dry and he found himself sitting under a bus shelter watching the orange dawn turn into a bright summer's day. The beauty he usually found in such a thing seemed to missing on this first day of being away and all he found he could think about was how alone he was. He would have stayed where he was had some rude human not shooed him from his position under the bench and once again he found himself going aimlessly through the town. It wasn't long before he found the buildings growing taller and the hustle and bustle becoming busier and as if it had happened all of a sudden he was dodging the huge steps of humans and the criss-crossing of traffic that seemed to come out of nowhere. Feeling ever more scared without Tugger he started to run again as he tried to get away from the flurry of the city. As he darted across one road he ground to a halt right in the middle and his eyes widened in terror as the bumper of a black cab came hurtling towards his face. In a split-second decision he jumped back in the direction in which he came and landed on the road just inches from where the taxi's wheel rolled by. In an instant he jumped up and started sprinting back into the crowd that had seemed like a swarm before and still did now. As he tried to move through the muddle of walking humans he was kicked and pushed around and many times found he was thrown to the ground by the blows. The humans that did so barely knew what they'd done before Misto pushed himself up again and desperately tried to get away. Before he knew it he was heading into the centre of the city and it wasn't until he started recognizing things he'd seen before that he realised it.

In the shadow of a side street Misto stopped to catch his breath as he looked back in the direction of the busy main road where he'd diced with death. He could have been killed back there it was so busy and as he looked up at the buildings which seemed to tower over him he suddenly felt very vulnerable. He was alone in the big city – something he'd never done before – and he had absolutely no idea where he was or where to go. If only he'd thought beforehand what he ought to do; now – although he knew he'd been in that area before – he had no idea where he was and hated it. As cruel as the situation was it began to get crueller as he flopped down on the pavement and put his head in his paws as the feeling of loneliness gripped him. Despite everything that had happened all he wanted was Tugger to hold him and tell him everything was going to be alright. He was so desperate for it but he knew he couldn't have it. He was angry with Tugger and was so hurt that he'd done what he'd done; why, then, did he long for him so badly?

As the conflicting thoughts battled it out within him he felt the painful pang of misery once again appear inside him and he slumped down even further as he leant against a wall in solitude. With his head in his paws he sniffled a little and tried to stop himself from crying despite not having much left within him to cry with. How could things have gotten this bad so quickly? It didn't seem possible. Then again, it probably was possible, wasn't it? Tugger and Bomba had slept together well over a month ago by now so the secret had been kept from him all this time. As Misto thought about what he'd learned he realised that everything that he thought was impossible was becoming more possible and he felt like a fool for thinking in the way that he had. If Tugger and Bomba had kept this from everyone for such a long time then they must have been talking about it for a while. Tugger must have had all of this figured out long before he decided to implement it so did that mean he didn't love him enough to tell him straight away? Would he have cared any less even if he had told him straight away? Probably not. It seemed to Misto that no matter which way he looked at it what Tugger had done remained the ugly act of betrayal that it always had been. The thought made Misto grab his ears as he looked down through his knees and squeezed them tightly in his misery and embarrassment. How could Tugger have done it?

Another thought made Misto look up briefly as his eyes grew pinker with the tears. Tugger had been adamant that what he'd done was an accident and he seemed to be so sorry for having done it; did he really mean that? If he did then shouldn't he have had enough solidarity not to do it in the first place? Once again Misto found himself in another conundrum and it was not one he had the energy to tackle at that moment. He was completely drained and desperately needed some rest. He was hungry too and as soon as he realised it his stomach vocalized its emptiness as if on cue. That would have to wait and sighing Misto looked around and noticed a dirty green dumpster at the other end of the street. With a heavy heart he pushed himself up off of the scummy, grey concrete and slowly made his way towards it. When he got to it he looked around apprehensively and sniffed the air to inspect. The smell around it was foul and was very distinctively that of very rotten rubbish and it made him sneer in disapproval. He almost turned around in disgust but then his aching heart and body gave strong protest forcing him to sadly examine it once more. Careful not to soil his coat too badly he bent low and shuffled underneath the dumpster where he found the smell was even worse. Taking very small steps he made his way across to a back corner and timidly curled up in the shade. Down here it was cold and quiet and was about the farthest thing from home that he could imagine. How could he have lowered himself to resting in such a disgusting place as this? This wasn't him, this was truly awful.

With a shaky sigh he closed his eyes and desperately begged for sleep to take him; anything to relieve him of the terrible pain he felt inside.

* * *

As the sun had risen that day Tugger found himself at a loss. Misto was well and truly missing and he felt awful when he realised he knew that if Misto didn't want to be found then there was no hope in hell of doing so. Tugger felt like the most terrible cat in creation for having done what he did to Misto and now that he'd disappeared he had no idea what more he could do. He had spent the rest of the night looking and now that the day was here he was out of options. With an even deeper feeling of shame he reluctantly turned around and headed back towards the junkyard. Although he knew he wouldn't be welcomed very warmly he didn't really care anymore; the only thing he cared about now was Misto and where he'd gone. He was so worried for his tom but at the same time the fear he felt for him seemed like the perfect punishment. That being said he was incredibly worried for Misto's safety; Tugger knew Misto was the most intelligent cat around but he wasn't that street smart. He didn't know how dangerous life out there was and he could so easily get himself into trouble that he couldn't get himself out of – regardless of any tricks he could pull. As such Tugger's heart was heavy with the grave knowledge that his mate was in danger and there was nothing he could do about it. The ball was very much in Misto's court at this point and he prayed that he would come back soon. In the meantime Tugger decided he would just have to keep looking and wait patiently for him to come back.

When he got back to the junkyard nobody was around. Somehow it felt like he was being afforded the grace of not having to face anyone – at least for the time being – and he quietly made his way back towards his den. He needed rest if he was going to go back out later and search for Misto.

As he started to climb the junk a voice came from behind but he didn't startle, after all he had sort of been expecting it,

"Where's Misto?"

"I don't know, Munk" replied Tugger stopping and turning around

"What do you mean you don't know?"

"He's disappeared and I have no idea where he's gone"

"Everlasting, Tugger! First Bomba and now this?"

"Oh just shut up, Munk! I don't need you banging on at me now"

"You've driven a Jellicle away, how can I just drop this?"

Tugger got angrier, "Then where were you the last time he was driven out?"

Munk gave him a steely glare, "You know that was different! Now he's gone for something that we know isn't his fault and that's bad, Tugger! He needs to come back now!"

"Don't you think I know that? Where the hell do you think I've been the past few hours? Brushing my mane? I've been out there looking for him but it doesn't really matter, if he doesn't want to be found then he won't let us"

"So that's it? You're giving up?"

"Don't be a twat! Of course I'm not giving up! I'm just back for a rest and then I'm going back out again"

"You'd had better find him. We need him, Tugger"

Now Tugger shouted, "I know! I know that better than any of you! He's my bloody mate and I love him so don't you think I'm worried sick?" His voice started to crack at that, "I need him too but I drove him away by doing something stupid like I always do and now he's lost out there and it's all my fault…" Shielding his eyes he turned around so his brother couldn't see him become emotional. A few seconds of silence passed before Munk stepped forward and put his paw on Tugger's back comfortingly. He didn't understand the maned tom a lot of the time but he knew he loved Misto, that much was crystal clear.

"Come on, Tug, don't get upset. You'll find him and there's got to be a way of working this out"

"But what if there's not, Munk? What if he doesn't want to be with me anymore?"

Munk thought for a moment and the replied, "That's up to him, what's up to you is to find him and really show him how much you love him and promise that you'll do whatever it takes to fix what's broken"

"What if it doesn't work?"

"You just have to hope that it will, it's all you can do"

Taking a deep breath Tugger turned back around and looked his brother in the eye before giving him a gentle nod of thanks. Munk smiled weakly back at him before speaking again,

"Go to bed then, I'll start looking for him as well and I'll see if I can get Deme too"

"…You don't have to" said Tugger quietly

"Of course I do. He's my responsibility just like all of you are but don't think I'm at all happy that I'm roped into finding him too"

As Munk started to walk away Tugger forced himself to squeeze out a quiet "Thanks" and then turned back into the darkness of his den. Upon entering he caught the scent of Misto lingering in the air and for a moment he half expected to see the tom sitting waiting for him. Looking around he found he was wrong but not alone for sitting in the place where he expected Misto to be was Jemima. Feeling obligated not to be short with her he tried his best not to sound exasperated,

"Jems, what are you doing here?"

The queen stood up and took a few places towards him before speaking. As she approached Tugger could see she looked rather irate and was apprehensive to speak with her.

"So you really don't know where he is then? She asked short-temperedly

"Did you hear what Munk and I were saying?"

"Yes, although I'd prefer to find out you were lying"

Tugger held out his arms to his sides, "What can I say? I think we're just gonna have to wait until he comes back"

"That's not good enough!" said Jemima before pulling her fist back and then driving it into Tugger's stomach. It was a surprisingly firm blow for someone of her size and Tugger bent over as he was winded so powerfully. As he struggled to catch his breath Jemima shouted at him, "You'd better find him or so help me Everlasting Cat I will pluck you bare!"

At that she stomped out of the den. Tugger managed to regain a little of his breathing and he groaned as the feeling of a bruise forming on his stomach lingered. Hobbling over to the bed he fell down onto it and curled up while still clutching his aching guts. That pain wasn't really his main focus though as the longing for Misto was a hundred times more painful.

Feeling like a worthless bastard he closed his eyes and whispered into the darkness of his den, "Please come home, Misto, I love you and I'm sorry"

* * *

For the next few days Misto had spent most of his time trying to cope with his sadness which was now turning into something much more serious: depression. Any of the Jellicles would be able to say without a doubt that Misto was not a cat they would ever expect to be associated with that word yet if they could have seen him as he tried to carry on their views would certainly be shaken. When he was awake he spent long periods of time sitting quietly thinking and that usually resulted in him becoming upset again and sobbing to himself as the world went by around him. He was still no closer to understanding why this happened and he desperately wanted the hurt he felt inside to end. By now he was very hungry and he was increasingly feeling the need to hunt for something to satisfy that urge. Whenever he tried though he simply found he didn't have the drive to do it and he ended up just feeling sorrier for himself than he had done before. Was he starting to fall apart? A few times he considered going back to the junkyard but when he gave it more than a fleeting amount of thought he found he just couldn't bear to. Not now. Not for a while it seemed. How could he go back and look at Tugger without feeling the rejection he'd become acquainted with? It was impossible despite how much he really wanted to get home and see a friendly face. In the days he'd been out in the city he had been terrified, knocked-down, nearly run over, nearly trampled, threatened by strays and chased by Pekes. It had been the most awful bunch of experiences and to top them all off he was still sleeping rough each night. How he wished he could curl up on his bed with the one he loved but he knew he couldn't. For a start the one he loved wouldn't be there, he had been gone ever since he found out about Tugger's infidelity and Misto missed him so very dearly. He wanted Tugger back, but when he looked at him would he even see him anymore?

As yet another day drew to a close the desperation for food started to become too great for Misto and he tentatively stepped out of his hiding place amongst some dirty bottle crates in a dingy back-alley. Looking around to make sure there was no threat of immediate danger he started to head towards the end of the small indentation amongst the buildings and stopped when he got to the street. Straight away he felt an empty pain in his stomach and he quickly brought his paw to it to try and relieve some of the discomfort. Clearly he needed something big so he was really going to have to try if he wanted to keep up his strength despite feeling hopeless. With a forced stride he paced out onto the street and started stalking as best he could. He was no stranger to the practice of course but in his weakened state he wasn't at all on top form. Sniffing the air he tried to detect any trace of anything edible but the smells of the city were so strong here he couldn't really pick out anything in particular. He could smell food but it was impossible to tell from which direction it came and it wasn't the smell of food that he was accustomed to. It smelt stale as if it had been lingering for a long time and the tux found it most unappealing. Still, he was becoming desperate and so he plodded on hoping he would come across something.

He had no luck that night and once again went to bed hungry. The next morning he was lucky enough to snag a rat that was stupid enough to run right across his path and while Misto was happy he'd gotten something he felt no better since on the one hand the rat itself didn't taste that great and on the other he knew he wouldn't have caught it had it not made itself so visible. He was really losing his touch and to pile that on top of the mountain of hurt he already felt just made him feel even lower – as if he could actually descend any more.

That evening he walked again, hoping something might come along and make him think of something other than Tugger. He hadn't strayed too far from some of the landmarks he'd seen when Tugger had brought him into London before and on this evening he tentatively made his way towards Tottenham Court Road to try and relive some of the happy times he'd had with his mate. As he looked up and down the busy, dirty street he found the wonder and security he'd felt before was missing and in their place was just a sense of danger. Still, he walked on as he didn't really care if anything else bad happened to him. He'd had such an awful time in the past few days that he didn't think anything else could top the things he'd been through. With his eyes to the ground in front of him he continued along the road trying to distance his mind from thoughts of his mate and the conflicting feelings therein. Since he was too caught up in his thoughts the tux didn't realise he had made his way to the corner of Shaftesbury Avenue and instinctively turned down it without taking into account his actions. As he concentrated on keeping from being stepped on by humans he made his way down the street towards Piccadilly Circus where as always the crowd was heaving. Suddenly he found he had walked right into a very dangerous situation and felt a desperation to find a quiet spot grip him. In a fright he once again found himself running and darted through the legs that flew by him on every side. Here and there he jumped and became more and more frantic as the footsteps seemed to come faster and in one final push he darted through the flurry and suddenly burst into the open. In the first few moments of his escape he stood panting whilst trying to make sure he was safe. As a result he did not notice where he was and a few moments later looked at the structure in front of him. He stood dumfounded as he looked up at the huge, black fountain that stood ahead of him and felt a twinge of wonder spark inside him as he realised this was the place that Tugger had brought him to on their first date. Straight away Misto brought his paw to his mouth and bit his knuckle as tears threatened to well up again – Tugger had been so sweet and amazing that night, nothing like he had expected him to be. He had seen another side of Tugger back then and it was one that looking back now he couldn't have helped but fall in love with. The feeling of love Misto felt at that moment when he thought of Tugger crashed together with the feeling of hurt he also felt like a train wreck and inside Misto felt his heart breaking all over again.

He didn't cry this time, he'd done so much crying in the past few days. Instead his head lulled forward and his entire body felt heavy from the emotional strife it was being forced to deal with. After a few moments of silent wallowing the tux looked back up at the fountain and decided it was not a place whose memory he wanted to tarnish with the actuality of Tugger's 'accident'. He wanted to remember it as a place where he had been incredibly happy and amazed by what he was seeing and to think for a moment that it would represent his heartbreak was not something he thought he could handle. Then again, the wonder he had felt before in this place didn't seem to be there anymore; on his first date he had been made to feel safe and warm by the bigger tom that stuck by him and protected him. Now he was alone the whole place simply felt darker and scarier and he desperately wanted to be somewhere that was less busy.

Taking a laboured, shaky breath Misto darted back into the crowd and prayed he would come out the other side alive.

* * *

"Any luck tonight?" asked Munk as he watched his brother trail back into the junkyard alone and looking incredibly downtrodden.

"Does it look like I had any bloody luck?" replied Tugger spitefully. A few seconds of silence passed before Tugger exhaled and looked up at Munk, "Sorry…"

"It's alright" said Munk as he stood up and made his way over to the maned tom. Raising a paw he squeezed his sad brother's shoulder to let him know he felt for him but it didn't seem to do much.

"I'm getting worried, Munk" said Tugger quietly, "He's been gone for days and I have no idea where he is. Nobody does"

"I'm sure he just needs some space, he'll be back"

"But what if he's in trouble? What if something bad has happened to him?"

Munk moved his paw down to Tugger's back, "He's smart, he'll be okay"

"I just wish I knew if he were alright. I miss him, Munk"

"You're doing the right thing by looking, bro, although the big effort comes when you find him"

"Yeah…" said Tugger looking away and sighing

"Maybe you should go to bed for a while, you look terrible"

Munk didn't realise the effect the words had on Tugger. He never heard them when they were in relation to him and he hated looking so bedraggled and scruffy. If he didn't have his looks then what did he have? Certainly not Misto anymore, Misto was all he had really had and now that he was missing Tugger felt like an empty shell of a cat. Feeling like he was at rock bottom Tugger gently nodded and then stiffly made his way back to his den.

He knew he'd really screwed this one up, how was he going to fix it when the time came?

* * *

Misto lay on the cold, filthy ground breathing heavily and shakily. He was so scared for his life that he just wanted to give up right there and then. He hated this, he wanted to go home and feel safe again but he just couldn't. Tugger would be there and so would Bomba; what if now that everyone knew he would see her showing? The kitten she and Tugger had made would be starting show its existence and it would constantly be a reminder that Tugger had broken the bond they shared for the sake of drunken pleasure. Was that all Misto meant to him? Was he worth so little that the opportunity for a quick shag was enough to pass him up? It certainly felt like it and it hurt badly. On the cold concrete Misto turned his face to the ground and buried his head with his paws; his life seemed to be at rock bottom now and he desperately wished he knew why this had happened to him. There didn't seem to be any other explanation apart from him just not being good enough to keep Tugger and his deepening depression started to make him believe it.

For hours he stayed curled up on the pavement just wishing there was something that could take the pain away but as the dawn started to break on a new day he realized that nothing was coming to save him. He was well and truly alone now and the loneliness was almost too much to bear.

Pushing himself up he coughed gently and shivered as the morning dew that had settled on his fur gave him a chill. At least it was summer now and he didn't have to deal with the perils of winter – the best thing it seemed of this whole situation. As he stretched gently he looked around and paused when he felt he recognized the location. At the end of the street was a building bathed in eerie blue light in a tint that seemed strangely familiar to him. In the back of his mind a little red flag went up telling him this was a bad place but Misto was wondering too much where on earth he had seen that light before to take notice. It was a strange sight as it mixed with the dim dawn but it was such a distinctive colour that Misto couldn't help but go towards it.

When he neared he hid behind a lamppost and looked up at the building which spilled a few humans from its doors every few minutes as they staggered off in weird directions. Why was this place so familiar and why was the need to get away from it becoming so much stronger? As Misto looked on his attention was grabbed by a scuffling and some loud whines which were unmistakeably feline radiating from the alley next to the building. Cowering behind the lamppost he peered out to see what kind of cat had made such a sound and his eyes widened when he saw a group of them laughing and shouting together as they walked away. Desperately hoping he wouldn't be noticed Misto hid himself again and waited for them to pass by before he ventured to look out once more. It was then that his unbridled curiosity compelled him against his common sense to tentatively walk down the alley and see where they had come from.

Feeling uneasy he took step after step as he scanned the dingy space between the buildings for any sign of life and when he found it was a dead end he stopped and puzzled as to where they had come from. Drawing a small amount of magic into his paw he held it up to light the end of the alley to get a better look but found in a few seconds that it fizzled out quickly and wouldn't come back when he tried to make it do so. That was strange, his magic had never let him down before so why was it doing it now? Shrugging it off he turned back around to exit the alley and started walking in the direction of the front of the building once more. He had made it about half way down before he heard voices again and stopped dead when he saw a few cats emerge from a hole in the wall to the left of him. Instantly he felt afraid but it subsided when he saw them laughing and staggering around – they looked really drunk and even if they were going to give him some trouble it didn't seem like anything he couldn't handle. Politely he stepped back and gave them space to pass by but as he did one of the queens in the group looked at him and slurred,

"You're a bit late, sweetheart, they're closing now"

Her comment made the other cats roar with laughter as they started to make their way out of the alley leaving Misto with a confused look on his face. What did she mean 'they were closing'? Feeling ever more curious he stepped towards the hole in the brickwork and sniffed gently to try and pick up some scents. Coming from the gap he could smell a mixture of a great many cats and the unmistakeably sickening aroma of sweat and alcohol. It triggered something else in his mind and he stood back looking into the dark place as he felt he was on the verge of remembering just what it was that drew him to this place.

After a few moments it hit him like a ton of bricks and he staggered back in shock. This was the place Tugger had brought all of them that night they had all gone out on the town. It was where they had all gotten horrendously drunk and spent the entire night partying. Most of all, this was the place where Tugger and Bomba had inebriated themselves so incredibly that upon returning home they had fallen into her den and performed the act that had ripped Misto's heart in two. Understanding now why he should have listened to the nag that told him to stay away he bit his lip and turned sharply so he couldn't see the awful, dark place. He didn't want to cry again but the great swirl of emotion he felt inside was becoming far too great for him to handle and walking over to the wall opposite him he leant his head against it and sobbed loudly as he thought about all the awful things had happened to him and he wished so strongly that he could go back to that night and stop all of it from happening. If only he had known at the time he would never have let them all go out that night and he wouldn't be in this mess now. In fact, he had never really wanted to in the first place. He remembered now how apprehensive he had been to go to the places Tugger had once frequented and it had only been when he was intoxicated that he had let that guard down. How stupid he felt for doing that. What kind of utter moron must he have been?

Slumping down against the wall he cried a little louder and just hated himself for having allowed all of this to happen. Now that he remembered some of the things from that night he started to feel as if it were really he that was to blame for not being a good enough mate to keep their relationship in check and he simply felt like dirt for it. If he really was to blame then surely it was he that had sabotaged their relationship and not Tugger, so, how could he have run away from him to begin with? It didn't seem fair on Tugger and surely he would never take him back now - not after this dreadful display of abandoning him when he was trying to make things better. Misto questioned whether maybe his actions were what had driven them apart and now that it was done how could Tugger take him back even if he begged him to?

Misto just wanted to curl up and fade away from the world and he felt like a pitiful excuse for a cat for crouching there in an alley crying for all the world to see. It wasn't until he heard a somewhat familiar voice behind him that he swallowed some of his sadness and turned around to look.

"Well, well, look what it is" came the female voice

"Please leave me alone" said Misto when he found it was the queen that he had met the night Tugger had brought him there. She looked a lot rougher than he remembered and Misto had no interest in seeing her, after all she was the cat that had forced him to drink all of that wretched booze.

"Oh that's nice! No 'hi there, how are you?', just a simple 'piss off' instead. And there was me thinking you were a nice little pussy"

Misto just looked down and whimpered in his misery and the sight made the queen feel really quite bad for him. He didn't look like he was in any state to be messed with like she had done before but still she didn't want to be all that nice; it wasn't her way.

"So what's wrong with you then?" she asked matter-of-factly, "Did mummy take away your ball of string?"

"No" sobbed Misto

"Then what? Come on, it's not nice to keep secrets and I thought you were a sweet little queen"

"I'm not a-…it's none of your business"

"Is it Tugger?" she asked blatantly having already guessed it was the right answer. Misto looked up at her briefly and then returned his face to his paws. It was all the queen needed to see. "Thought so" she continued, "Well, he was always a bit of a dick. You're better off without him"

"No I'm not" cried Misto, "I love him"

"Pfft! Love him? Nobody loves Tugger! Nobody loves him because he loves nobody and if you think otherwise then you're an idiot"

"You're wrong!" whimpered Misto more firmly, "We do love each other!"

"Then why are you here in such a state?"

Misto didn't respond.

"What? Did he upset you? Did you catch him flirting with someone else?"

Still silence.

"Everlasting Cat! Give me something, will you? Did you do something? Is it your fault?"

"I don't know" squeaked Misto, "I don't know anymore…"

The queen was quiet for a moment as she felt pity for him – it sickened her. Reluctantly trying to be a little more sympathetic she crouched down in front of him and tilted his chin up to look at him, "Something's hurt you bad then, eh?"

Misto just nodded meekly and sniffed as the tears continued to run down his cheeks.

"Well, you know, Tugger was never really relationship material…"

"But he was…is…was…oh, I don't know!"

"So have you two broken up then?"

"No…but…well, I don't know. I just don't know anything anymore" he said before returning his face to his paws.

Feeling uncharacteristically sorry for Misto the queen felt too bad to just leave him there despite how much she wanted to. He looked so sad and it just didn't feel right to put him through any more.

"Confused, huh?"

Misto nodded, "I just want it all to go away…I want to forget it all…"

At that the queen had a thought and a smirk graced the corner of her mouth.

"Really?" she asked slyly. Misto nodded and looked up at her with despondency. "Stay here" she said before turning back and going through the gap in the wall once more. Misto was left alone again for a little while until she returned a few minutes later carrying something incredibly conspicuous. Misto perked up a little as his curiosity was once again stimulated and he tilted his ears forward as she once again crouched down in front of him.

"What's that?"

"Just a little something to help you forget" the queen said wryly as she brought forward what now appeared to be a dirty little pouch in her paws. Misto felt his apprehension stir again but that nag was becoming less commanding now.

"What is it?" Misto asked again

"Just smell it" said the queen as she held it up to his face. Misto leant back straight away and eyed the pouch not really wanting to get something that dirty near his face. "Just put your nose to it and smell it. You'll enjoy it, I promise."

"What is it?"

"Oh for crying out loud…here!" said the queen frustratedly as she grabbed his head and pushed his nose into the pouch. As he startled Misto took in a sharp breath as he was assaulted and pressed to the dirty cloth object and straight away he felt lightheaded and as if he were floating. Pushing himself back he sat there dazed for a moment as his thoughts seemed to scramble and then come back together from their mess. He shook his head violently from side to side to relieve himself of the strange feeling and just stared straight ahead at the pouch the queen held in front of him. Whatever had just happened had been indescribable and Misto simply couldn't think of the words to put to it. The small had been blissful but disgusting at the same time, very herbaceous and it had tickled as he inhaled it. Quickly Misto deduced there must have been something inside the pouch that smelt that nice and gave him such a strange feeling. It had been like a rush of energy but at the same time it had been very calming and for a second the world had seemed a little brighter while his problems disappeared.

When he asked the question this time he spoke incredibly curiously and with fascination in his voice, "What is that?"

The queen in front of him smiled in a conniving way as she saw the effect she had desired had grabbed the tux in front of her. She loved corruption and to have managed to corrupt such a sweet, innocent little tom like Misto was a great achievement for her. With an evil chuckle she responded,

"It's just a little 'nip"

"'Nip?" asked Misto looking up at her and then back at the pouch

"Catnip"

"What does it do?"

"Oh, sugar, it'll make your wildest dreams come true"

"What do you mean?"

The queen eyed him up before she spoke again, "Say you wanted to escape to a happier place, a couple of deep breaths of this and you'll be flying sky-high"

"I don't understand" said Misto quietly

"You want to forget what Tugger did to you, right?"

Misto froze, he had completely forgotten he had been so upset. Instantly the feelings came rushing back and he remembered just how terrible he had been made to feel and how desperately he wished he could escape the crushing pain. He was also fascinated by how he had simply forgotten those feelings as soon as he'd had a snort of that stuff the queen held – what had she called it? Catnip?

"Yes" said Misto meekly with both a twinge of doubt.

"Knock yourself out…literally" laughed the queen as she forced the pouch of catnip into Misto's paw and stood up. Misto watched her as she quickly left the alley he was sitting in and once again found himself alone in the early morning light. Looking back from the end of the alley he stared down at his paw at the small pouch he held and examined it carefully. She had said that this could make him forget everything; he would really welcome that about now. Although, the last time he had agreed to something that queen had offered him he had ended up with a terrible hangover and a cheating mate. Could he trust her?

Going through the thoughts one by one in his mind it wasn't long before he once again centred on Tugger. All that was there was hurt and he knew he had been begging to leave all that behind for days now. Feeling as if there were nothing else left he could do Misto gripped the pouch tightly and very slowly brought it towards his face. He was nervous because the feeling he had experienced before when he'd inhaled the scent of the catnip had been incredibly strange and not all together settling. She had said it would take his troubles away though and there was nothing else in the world that Misto wanted at that moment. Without breathing in or out Misto held the pouch against his nose for a second contemplating whether or not to really go through with it. The thought of Tugger then gripped his mind once more and the sting of his betrayal felt like knives. Without another question Misto took in a sharp, deep breath of the herby, tickly scent and within seconds that same feeling of airiness gripped his mind. Another breath and the world all of a sudden seemed to be filled with bright colours and simply everything seemed to make him happy. As such Misto felt a smile cross his lips and he started to giggle as a bubbly, joyous feeling filled him up to his ears. Another breath and his vision started to melt into a great colourful mesh and he was amazed when bright coloured shapes and patterns started whizzing past him. He wasn't in the alley anymore, he had no idea where he was but he didn't care. This new world seemed so much happier and nicer than the one he had been in seconds ago and the best thing was he didn't feel even a speck of hurt here. In this catnip realm he felt spectacular and once again he felt like the Magical Mister Mistoffelees he had been before only this time a thousand times more powerful. He felt he could do anything and nothing could stand in his way now that he was supercat!

In reality Misto lay slumped on the floor of the alley not having moved from his spot at all. The pouch he still had pressed to his nose but his face was resting at a horrible angle against the ground while his eyes were half lidded and dilated to a dangerous level. He breathed jaggedly as the catnip raped his senses and as he lost control he started to drool as his jaw slacked open while he made laboured gargling sounds. Every muscle in his body was relaxed and even if he knew what were going on it was unlikely that he could have moved. Catnip played havoc with many cats but when it clashed with Misto's magic is seemed to produce absolute chaos inside him.

As he lay there hallucinating and having the time of his life inside his own fantasy the small tux started to shiver violently and then escalated into a seizure. As he convulsed he threw up onto the ground but he was aware of none of this. He had been whisked away to a dream world, far away from his body which bore the damage of the catnip which attacked his fragile mind and to him it seemed like hours before he fell into a deep, unfathomable blackness.

It was the beginning of a very dark time in Misto's life where he was speeding for absolute rock bottom with no one around to save him from himself. And that was the very point of it now: He no longer needed to keep his distance, he desperately needed to be saved.

**Oh sweet bejeebus! Misto's on drugs! Oh, if only he knew how bad that stuff was for you! If only one of the Jellicles could help him! If only he had listened to his instinct and not trusted that queen!**

**More to come, thanks for reading. If you have a spare review then I'll gladly take it off your hands. x**


	11. Enough Is Enough

**Firstly, sorry it's taken me nearly a week to get this one up. I've been busy as I don't know what and this unfortunately took a back seat for a few days.**

**Secondly, sorry about the chapter. I don't really like this one to be honest because 1) it's short, and 2) there's not much progression. Reason is I just can't think of any other way to link where the story is now to where I want the story to end up. I hope it's not too boring but it's kind of one where the story wouldn't work without it. **

**Thirdly, English Colloquialism: Is 'miffed' a word people use outside of the UK? If not, it means 'annoyed'.**

**Anyway, without further ado…**

**Love Is No Fairytale**

**Chapter 11**

**Enough Is Enough**

As if he needn't have bothered going out to begin with Tugger unhappily lumbered back into the junkyard. His night of searching was once again found to be fruitless and feeling as if he'd failed for the however many nights it was in a row he set his mind on ignoring the few stares he garnered as he came back into his home. He didn't care anymore what anyone thought of him; the first few days maybe he had but by now he was so wrought with grief he just didn't care about the tribe's judgements. They certainly were strong though as aside from Munk and occasionally Demeter everyone seemed to avoid him and whisper when he walked by. By now the story of what he'd done had reached everyone and had gone through many generations each more outlandish than the last. Many times he had thought about setting them straight since they probably thought he and Bomba had rutted right in front of Misto while telling him how worthless he was. Still, by now he had given up caring what they thought and didn't give a toss over whether or not they hated him. A weird kind of numbness had crept into him somewhere along the line and while he knew his chances of finding Misto were slim he found it was all he could think about. Primarily that very thought had made him feel worthless but it had mercifully let up as if he'd gone into some sort of contingency mode where the only thing he lived for was to search for his lost mate. He could, after all, be anywhere by now as well as in any state. What if he was lying dead in a gutter somewhere or had been ripped to pieces by strays?  
As the bright morning sun hurt his tired eyes Tugger closed them heavily as the sad thoughts washed over him like a wave and just concentrated on getting to his den. Sleeping was harder now since he was wondering what Misto was doing at every moment and whether or not he was alright. He had to believe he was okay wherever he was because it was the only thing keeping him from tearing his fur out. Still, he couldn't ignore the truth that he knew so well: Misto was not safe wherever he was and every moment that ticked by was a moment he got closer to oblivion. That is if he hadn't already reached it. It had been three weeks since he'd last seen him and the passing days were now torturous. This is why Tugger had resolved to bring Misto back no matter what it took. Somehow he would bring him back even if that meant dragging him kicking and screaming; he just needed to know he was alive and safe, that was all that mattered now.

Climbing up the junk he quickly disappeared from sight leaving the few Jellicles that sat scattered around the clearing without anything to focus on for a few moments. No sooner had Tugger gone Bomba timidly emerged from her den fixated on the doorway her kitten's father had just gone through. She had been ruthlessly avoiding him since the night Misto had run away since she figured she was the last cat he'd want to see. Or perhaps that was the second to last cat since now Bomba was looking noticeably a little plumper. Anyone that didn't know she were pregnant wouldn't be able to tell but the Jellicles armed with the grave knowledge of her situation noticed all to well that she would be properly showing soon. Bomba knew this better than any of them and she felt the way she looked was like a mark of shame she was force to carry around. Her body was changing and it was a symbol of why Misto was missing and as a result many of the cats she lived with had behaved much differently around her. In the passing weeks they had pretended not to notice her as she went by and whispered about her when they thought she couldn't hear. It was awful and she wished desperately that she didn't have to carry that dratted kitten around. The only cats that seemed to give her the time of day anymore were Munk, Deme, and Jenny since she had started making an incredible fuss like she did when any queen fell pregnant. It had been nice for Bomba to have that contact with somebody but it still didn't make up for the fact that almost everyone else had a strong dislike for her.

On this evening she quietly made her way across the clearing to try and sniff out something to eat. The need to eat more was becoming apparent now and with all the changes she was going through she was finding it hard to catch enough. She knew she could really use some help with finding food but she felt too ashamed to ask anyone. If only it wasn't Tugger's kitten she would have all the help she needed. No matter which way she looked at it though there was no way out and it meant she just had to soldier on. Despite this she felt rather miffed that although it had been an accident Tugger should nonetheless lend her a helping paw. After all it was his kitten as much as hers and it was kind of the point that the father helped the pregnant mother, right? Whenever she thought about making a stand though she found she couldn't bear to put him through any more strife and as well as this she felt a little uncertain of how he might react. Like everyone else she had noticed a change in him and now that he was hell bent on finding Misto did that mean her taking a stand might be the straw that broke the camel's back? What if he lost his temper and flew into a rage? Could she defend herself? After all, it seemed he had tried to hit her before and she had been terrified. What if that happened again and this time Munk wasn't around to save her?

With a sad sigh she returned her attention to stalking for prey. She was getting hungrier now and she delicately rubbed her tummy knowing her growing kitten was feeling the same.

* * *

Misto opened his eyes gently and looked around feeling the sting of the early morning sun on them. As he lay there he tried to deduct what had happened during the night but it wasn't long before he found he had completely blacked out. So what really had happened? The last thing he remembered was staring at a little pouch full of catnip as he shakily brought it towards his face. He remembered the last few seconds of placing it to his nose and inhaling deeply but that was all, everything after that was just black and he had no idea what had happened since.

Feeling like he had been hit over the head with a brick Misto shakily pushed himself up and somehow managed to support himself on his thinning, matted paws. He had no idea how long it had been since his first taste of catnip by now but it felt like years to him. He could barely remember when he had seen that queen who had given him this evil little pouch full of the herb but if he had been coherent enough he wouldn't really have cared. The past few weeks had been a completely drug fuelled bender on catnip and this graciously afforded him the memory loss he so desperately craved. During his spell he'd flown sky high and swam through the deepest oceans amongst colours so vibrant he turned to tears and overall he'd gone on a journey that to him was so incredibly mind-blowing he had barely remembered about how painful it was to think of Tugger. Or at least that was what he wanted to tell himself; in real life the situation was quite different. During his 'journey' he'd barely eaten a thing and as a result he'd become almost emaciated from the lack of nutrition. The catnip trips were all he had experienced and as such his body was suffering for it. While he wanted to believe that he was forgetting his misery all we was really doing was dampening it for a few hours and then coming back around feeling a hundred times worse. The catnip didn't make him forget his pain, it just distracted him for long enough to feel some kind of false relief and it landed him right back where he started feeling utterly hopeless and ashamed of himself for sinking so low. And that was just on the inside, on the outside he was certainly displaying the effects of the 'nip and he did not look good for it. His usually sleek sheen had become dull and bedraggled and his general demeanour had gone from one of great inquisitiveness and brightness to a run down, worn out lump. Misto looked sickly and as if he didn't have long left and any passer-by would think he were a cat in desperate need of help. It wasn't quite as simple as that though, he was in London and of the few strays that saw him none of them thought twice about offering him the help he needed. Misto was all alone and rapidly hurtling towards the point of no return. If Jenny could see him now she wouldn't hesitate to say that if someone didn't help him immediately he wouldn't be long for this world.

As Misto wobbled on his paws he tried to focus his eyes on the world around him and found it took a good few minutes before his vision was clear enough to see where he was. It was then that a strange headache gripped his head and he grimaced as he placed his paws against it. This was the downside of the catnip, it left him with such a terrible headache that he positively felt sick and when that mixed with his incredible hunger they formed some weird type of coalition that to him felt like his stomach was trying its hardest to pack up and leave his body altogether. Bending over Misto diverted his attention from his throbbing head to his painful stomach and bit his lip as the empty ache ravaged him. He knew he needed food but he just didn't care to look for it anymore. Any moment that he wasn't as high as a kite was still too painful to bear and as a result he found his only memories were those of him bringing that damn pouch towards his face. Sure, it was fun while it lasted but it sure hurt afterwards. One particular shameful moment was a few days ago which had involved him feeling like he could dance until forever and as a result had wandered out into the middle of a very busy road and thrown himself around obliviously. Traffic had stopped and honked at him as it tried to pass by and it wasn't until some human came up and kicked him to the gutter that he stopped. That had hurt badly and when he'd woken up his entire body ached terribly. That wasn't the first time he had realised he was doing something wrong though, far from it. He had been waking up to these feelings of shame over the catnip for over a week now and he had never hated himself any more than he did then. The worst part was that Misto realised the effect the 'nip was having on him and he was deeply saddened since he felt now that he'd started he couldn't very well stop. Despite what he tried to tell himself he knew it wouldn't be long before he inhaled his catnip again and he would be able to try and forget about Tugger.

During the past three weeks he had found that his longing to be with Tugger had grown stronger and stronger and his anger towards him weaker. He hated that he needed him so much because he just didn't feel he could go back to him. Those conflicting feelings were what constantly drove him to the catnip to find relief. Above it all he knew it was really becoming too much now and something had to be done. He hated it but he knew he needed Tugger to save him, he was his mate and that's what mates do regardless of how bad things get. All he needed was the courage.

Foolishly he tried to ignore his desperate need for the maned tom and taking a shaky step forward Misto decided he needed to find some food. With a sharp ache in his side directed himself in the direction of the street at the end of the alley but he'd made it not five steps when he suddenly remembered what he'd forgotten and spun on his paws to retrieve it. Bending down he sighed as he grabbed his pouch full of catnip and straightened back up. When he was a kitten he remembered how Jenny used to warn all of them of the dangers of catnip and similar things and he also remembered how in his kittenish innocence he'd sworn never to go near it. Catching his reflection in a puddle Misto really understood why she had said those things and couldn't help but list the things that had gone wrong with him as a result: He looked filthy and disgusting, his mind was all over the place, his body ached and protested constantly and above all else his magic had packed up. Ever since he'd started on the 'nip he'd found that he couldn't even flick a spark into existence anymore and that really made him feel low – although in hindsight he couldn't really figure out whether it was his depression that had taken such a toll on him or the catnip. He desperately missed his magic, it was the one thing he could do that made him special and revered by everyone else. Now that it had gone what was left? He was just a disgusting, little stray that was fading away with no hope of a happy life unless he went home. And that was the horrible thing: the only option for him to take that would make him better would be to go home and see Tugger. How could he do that? Tugger was there, Bomba was there, everyone else was there and they'd all be thinking the same thing: 'Misto ran away because his mate got bored of him'. Could he actually face that?

Standing there he tried to tell himself he wasn't going to do it. In a pitiful attempt at solidarity he straightened himself up and fixed his gaze forward to try and look the part. It was when he tried to walk forward that he realised how silly he was to try and ignore his feelings. When another gripe of pain stabbed in his stomach he lurched over and moaned pitifully as he waited for it to pass. That one was far worse than any of the others had been and he suddenly became scared that something was horribly wrong with him. He'd never felt something so frightfully painful – aside from his broken heart – and he started to shiver in fear that he was dying. _'Enough is enough'_ Misto's mind told him and his heart ached as he knew it was the truth. He needed to swallow his pride and just go home. He needed help and that was the only place he was going to get it. If he didn't he would surely end up in a gutter soon and he really didn't want to go out like that. Even though Tugger would be there and he'd feel awful he would just have to deal with that since he couldn't go on in this dirty, ugly, drug-fuelled life anymore.

Biting his lip as a tear slipped from his eye he forced himself to straighten up, took a deep breath and then started to place one foot in front of the other. Each step brought with it a shooting pain in his stomach but he did his best to plough on. He was going back to the junkyard and in some way he was just going to have to deal with it. Yes, Tugger would be there but he would simply have to try and avoid him. He had nothing left anymore and he desperately wished he could have something back from his old life even if it was only good health. For that matter anything would do at this point.

* * *

Bomba fell back on the junk exhausted and panting as hard as she could. The last three attempts at catching a mouse had all failed miserably and by now she was getting too tired to carry on. She hated this, she hated that she was losing her stamina so quickly and she hated everything about the situation she was in. Closing her eyes while she tried to regain her breath she let her head roll back leaving her facing up towards the sky. She didn't notice that during her hunting she had made her way back towards the clearing and was laying against the other side of Tugger and Misto's den and since she was unaware of this she didn't realise she ought not to be too loud so as not to disturb the obviously groggy and short-fused Tugger. Still, there it was: Bomba remained there making a fair racket as she tried to regain a little composure while the sounds of which gently radiated through the junk into where Tugger was laying. He had just gotten off to sleep when the noise started coming through and he opened his eyes angrily when he was roused from his much-needed rest. Feeling in no mood to be interrupted he pushed himself up and stormed across the den to confront the annoying noise-maker and once outside he stomped his way around to the back of his den. There he found Bomba breathing a little steadier than she had been a moment ago and from this angle she did not notice the irate maned tom come towards her menacingly. Unfortunately for Bomba seeing it was her only made Tugger more annoyed and for a brief moment he forgot to be at least somewhat civil to her.

"Could you be any bloody louder?" he asked in a sleepy but heated huff

Bomba startled when she saw him glaring at her and coming to tower over her. She pushed herself up quickly when he got closer and made sure there was plenty of room between them when he stopped.

"For goodness sake! I'm only trying to hunt!" she replied timidly

"Well you're disturbing me! I've been out all damn night trying to find Misto in case you forgot, oh and by the way, no I still have not found him. Thanks for asking!" he said both sarcastically and bitterly.

Bomba's expression darkened at that, "Oh so you want me interfering in your life now? You want me bugging you every five minutes to see if you've found your darling little mate?"

"Don't you dare talk about him like he doesn't mean anything! He's the most important cat in the world to me and I'm not gonna stand by listening to you talk about him like that!"

"Like what?"

"Like he doesn't matter"

"I didn't say that"

"You meant it though"

"Like hell I meant it, you're putting words in my mouth"

"Yeah right, I couldn't stuff any more words into your giant mouth if I tried! You always seem to have something to say!"

"Oh shut up, Tugger! In case you haven't noticed I've not been having the best time the last few weeks either"

"Oh of course! It's all about you! It's always about you, isn't it?"

"For Heaviside sake! Will you stop jumping to bloody conclusions for once?"

The two glared at each other fuming for a few moments before Bomba sighed and looked down. She then spoke grimly,

"Look, Tug, we can't carry on like this"

"Like what?" he spat

"At each other's throats all the time. We're having a kitten and like or not we're gonna have to bring it up somehow…"

"Oh I don't need this now…"

"Tugger we have to decide upon something! We can't just leave this and take it as it comes, this is serious!"

Tugger was quiet for a moment before responding, "Misto and I were serious…but look how that turned out. Nothing matters to me until I get him back, nothing at all"

Bomba could see he was really having a tough time but she couldn't just let this go, "I know, Tug. I know this is hard on you but time is slipping away and I can't do this on my own."

"Well what do you want me to do? That kitten's given me enough trouble as it is"

"It's still your kitten, Tug, we're gonna have to manage it somehow"

There was a short pause before Bomba continued, "Can we please just stop fighting. I know you're angry and I know I'm angry but this is more important than that. Way more. We're just gonna have to find a way to get through this and we can't do that if we're gonna kill each other every time we see each other"

"Well what do you want me to do?"

"Can we just call a truce? I'm really gonna need some help soon and I can't expect Munk, Deme and Jenny to be there all the time. You're this kitten's father so I really hope you'll do the honourable thing and help out"

"Don't bloody patronize me!" said Tugger feeling annoyed at the comment

"Well, you know what I mean. Can you please just keep an eye out for me as I get bigger? Please."

Tugger looked her up and down and despite feeling disdain for her he knew she spoke the truth. It was his kitten and he really should be helping her. Stiffly he responded,

"Misto comes first. I don't care what's going on with anything else, nothing comes before him and that includes the kitten. I need to get him back and I need to talk to him but after that…I suppose I can help you out…"

Bomba gave him a weak smile as she listened to him. She really did understand how important Misto was to him and she didn't want to cause any more of a rift amongst them. Feeling a little better off she held out her paw in front of her offering it to Tugger.

Taking a moment Tugger apprehensively raised his paw too and gently grazed it against hers. It was a silent gesture of their mutual understanding and inside themselves they felt that in some way they'd made some progress towards getting their lives back on track despite what a terrible mess they still had to go through.

"So you were looking for a mouse, or something?" asked Tugger tiredly

"Yeah. I'm eating more now" she said quietly while patting her tummy.

Looking around briefly it didn't take Tugger long to pluck out a few from the surrounding junk. He offered them to Bomba and she graciously took them from him feeling a little less hopeless than she had done before. She timidly thanked him and watched him go back to his den groggily after that. As she stood alone she felt a glimmer of hope inside herself and wondered if maybe things weren't as bad as they seemed.

**There it is, sorry if it sucked. I wanted to take a little further than that but I just couldn't think of anything else. The next chapter I'm sure will be much better but even so I'd love to hear what you think of this one. Criticisms as well as comments are always highly valued.**

**Thanks for reading. x**


	12. A Dark Shadow

**Good news! I'm happier with this chapter!**

**Thumbs up if it's this picture or another from that set that inspires you to write Tugger/Misto fics in the first place: .net/fs30/f/2008/182/f/b/Tugger_and_Misto_by_**

**WARNING: Bad language, Tugger drops a few F-Bombs (but can you blame the poor guy?)**

**Love Is No Fairytale**

**Chapter 12**

**A Dark Shadow**

It was strange not having Misto around. The junkyard had seemingly lost its liveliness somehow and as a result nobody really felt right anymore. Days passed without much going on and each of the Jellicles just going through the day-to-day motions. Cats would pass each other with barely a polite nod and the general chatter that usually hovered in the air seemed to be missing. It resulted in a strange kind of malaise that was both unfamiliar and unnerving to everyone and while many cats – especially the kittens – tried to carry on as normal it was in the end found to be useless and everyone tended to fade away in defeat. Clearly Misto was a more crucial part to the junkyard than anyone had thought before and it really seemed that without him they were all at a loss.

Aside from Tugger, those who were feeling the loss of Misto most gravely were none other than Victoria and Jemima. Most of their time they spent together sitting away from any larger groups that formed and didn't really speak to anyone let alone each other. In some way they were happy to provide each other with some kind of lukewarm comfort but it was the fear that Misto was not alright that kept them in such a sorry state. In the beginning they had tried so hard to keep their hopes up but now as their dear friend and brother had been missing for so long the spark of life they usually felt seemed to be disappearing.

"Have you eaten today?" asked Jemima quietly to the white queen that sat nearby.

Victoria was silent for a second before she responded, "I forgot…again"

"You must eat. You'll get ill"

"I keep forgetting, I'm too worried about Misto to think of anything else"

It was then Jemima's turn to be silent as she felt the same sentiment. A moment later she spoke again,

"Have you told your dad he's missing?"

Victoria shook her head, "It wouldn't be worth him worrying, besides if I told him he'd probably have a heart attack or something"

"Do you think he would?"

"You've seen how fat he is, what do you think?"

Jemima gave a half-hearted chuckle, "That's Bustopher, I suppose. That's always been Bustopher"

"Do you think he's alright though?"

"Bustopher?"

"No, Misto."

"Like I said yesterday I don't know. I wish I did but I just don't"

"I'm so worried, Jemima, he's never been gone for this long before"

"He's barely been gone at all in the past"

"I know. I just wish he'd come back, I'd give anything…"

"We'll just have to wait and hope…" was all Jemima could think of to say. When she heard a sniffle come from Victoria she looked up and saw the white queen was trying to hide her face as she began to sob again. She had been doing that a lot the last few days and it pained Jemima to see her friend so upset. It made her feel wobbly as well and as she felt her own jaw starting to shake she shuffled towards Victoria and put her arm around her. It was nice to still feel close to somebody despite how horrible it was to be so wrought with grief for their missing friend.

Across the clearing in his den Tugger sleepily opened his eyes and lay staring up at the ceiling. Once again another night had come and it was time for him to get up and search for Misto. For a while he remained on his bed just staring straight upward without really seeing what was there and thinking about what his life had become as he tried to will his body to get up. All he had done in the passing weeks was search for Misto and each day had been more terrible than the last. He'd seen some of the most disgusting places in London as well as some of the most dangerous and he hated to think that his mate was out there somewhere. He utterly hated himself for what he'd done, especially since it had driven Misto away from him. He was so worried that he found it difficult to sleep at night and by now he understood just what a stupid, selfish act what he'd done with Bomba really had been. He could see this really meant a lot to Misto and Tugger was crushed that he'd ruined the most special thing in his life. That was how he felt by now as his hope for finding Misto was almost gone. He had been searching for so long that only a few specks of hope remained and they like the rest were fading away. If only he knew the reason he wasn't finding Misto then he'd at least have some kind of security but the fact that he didn't know a single thing was what he just didn't understand and he just wished he could see him again, even if it was just for one last plea for forgiveness.

'_That's not going to happen though, is it?'_ thought Tugger as he lay there not having moved. In a way he knew it was the truth but up until now he hadn't wanted to believe it. He wouldn't let himself believe it but now that yet another night had come he started to feel very alone in the world. The one true light in his life had gone and he wasn't coming back, that meant he had no purpose anymore. No purpose to go on, no purpose try, no purpose to stick around. He was a cat with nothing and he hated that feeling. Before, he'd felt like the king of the world but now that his life had been put into perspective he realised that the only thing that gave him meaning was Misto.

Very slowly, he started to feel an emptiness open up in the pit of his stomach and a tension starting behind his eyes slowly growing bigger and pushing its way out. Tears started to well up and as he closed his eyes in defeat he started to shake from the need to cry. Labouredly, he rolled onto his side and turned his face into the pillow his head rested on. There he lay for a long time sobbing silently over the loss of his beloved as the last shreds of hope of seeing him again faded into nothing. He felt nothing anymore, everything that had made him himself had gone with Misto and it wasn't coming back. He was alone from now on, useless and alone.

* * *

Turning yet another corner Misto took step after shaky step and once again had to steady himself against a fence to prevent against falling down. He'd done a lot of that during his journey back to the junkyard and each time had left him feeling ten times worse. He had started his trip days ago, a trip that should have taken him only a few hours if he was in good health. What was obvious though was that he certainly was not and to look upon his frail, grey-looking form was truly horrifying. His eyes were hazy and his fur had completely lost its sparkle that it had so magnificently boasted before. His body looked weak and he was very thin as he attempted to make his way home. Along the way his reluctance to return had transformed into desperation since with every passing moment he felt he was approaching the point where he was beyond help. His stomach felt like it had been tied in knots and screamed at him to do something. Misto had no idea what it was he needed but he knew that the pain he felt needed Jenny's help. He barely had any energy anymore and he feeling so very weary as he tried to trudge on.

On top of all of this, there was one thing that was more pitiful than all of his sorry attributes put together. In his left paw he still clutched the one thing that had driven him to such desolation and as he looked at it he felt a sense of hatred towards the awful item. For a second he considered throwing it away to be rid of the evil herb but it wasn't long before he realised he just couldn't. That little pouch of catnip was just too appealing to him and in some ways it had been so kind in relieving him of his pain for a little while. Now there was something: right now he was feeling truly awful, surely a little catnip would help him along his way, right? It would be like a friend carrying him along and taking the load off, how could he possibly turn that down?

A few seconds later Misto realised just how stupidly he was thinking and sneered at the pouch in disgust. Had he fallen so low that he was actually thinking he could rely on this hallucinogenic piece of filth to give him the strength he needed? Surely not! He was better than that! He was the Magical Mister Mistoffelees for goodness sake, he didn't need catnip to get along!

As the words passed through his mind he suddenly felt a deep pang of shame. He knew he was so far from being the Magical Mister Mistoffelees he used to be and he felt so sorry for himself that he'd allowed the cat he once was to disappear. He had changed, he could see that and it wasn't at all a change for the better. He had ruined himself and he couldn't blame this on what Tugger had done. It was he that had pressed the catnip to his nose and inhaled so deeply, not Tugger so it was he that was responsible for his disgrace.

In sheer embarrassment he closed his eyes and looked down in sadness just as he thought he couldn't sink any lower. He couldn't take any more blows, it was time to do something about it. He then opened his eyes and shakily looked up, he wasn't done just yet, not by a long shot! Feeling a great surge of courage build up inside him he desperately pushed his searing pain to the side and moved forward. If he was going out now then he wasn't going without a fight and with a desperate lurch he continued on his way.

His newfound pride was quickly dashed when a great surge of agony ripped through his body and he fell to the ground once more. He felt truly horrific as he writhed on the ground in the most sickening pain and he wondered for a moment if that really was the end for him. When it subsided a few seconds later he started to shiver as the last few shreds of strength he held within him gave their very last and he desperately tried to push himself up. It took a lot of effort but he soon made it back onto his weak, shaky paws and looked straight ahead. Carefully he went forward again and slowly carried on. He was still a long way from the junkyard but he swore to himself there and then he'd get there or die trying.

As a final courageous act he looked at the catnip pouch in his paw and gripped it tightly. He continued to do so for a long time but eventually he found something within him that helped him raise it above his head and throw it down hard into the gutter. He then forced his sight ahead again and struggled on. He hoped he could get on without that pouch. No, he knew he could get on without it.

* * *

Munk stood quietly on top of the big tyre in the clearing looking out across the junkyard. On his face he wore a look of stern, reserved, thoughtfulness as he wondered about what was happening to the tribe he protected. They were literally losing their very life force and the usual joie de vivre that he saw in each and every Jellicle was well and truly missing.

As he stood thinking his mate gently came up to him and looked out in the same direction. They stood there silently for a while before Demeter spoke,

"You've been doing this a lot lately"

"What?" asked Munk without looking at her

"Staring silently. It's worrying"

"I just don't understand what's going on, Deme"

"Are you sure?"

"Well…no, of course I understand. It's just that I never realised how important he was to us all before. Now that he's gone everyone's just wasting away and I have no idea how to stop it"

"It's not your place to fix all of the world problems, dear"

"This is one I should be able to do though…"

"How could it be?"

"I should have stopped Misto from running away. I should have done something to keep us together. I should never have let them go out that night. This is my fault…" he said as he finally averted his gaze and looked down shamefully. This was the first time Demeter had actually heard Munk say that he thought he was to blame for Misto's disappearance and it was horrible to think that he actually believed it.

"Now you stop it!" she said firmly, "You couldn't have known, not at all! Don't you dare think you're to blame for this! I won't allow you to"

Munk thought for a moment and then responded, "I still should have done something…"

Demeter couldn't let this go any further and taking his paws he forced him to look her in the eye, "You couldn't have fixed this, you still can't. This just happened and it had nothing to do with you. The solution is not yours to find and even though I know how much you care for everyone there are things that happen that not even you can prevent. All we can do is carry on and hope we'll come out stronger on the other side."

Demeter heard her mate exhale tiredly as she watched him looked down in defeat. He knew she was right but he had a hard time swallowing that truth. A few moments later he looked back up at her and simply said, "I love you"

"I love you too" replied the black and gold queen before she hugged him tightly. The pair stayed that way for a long time afterwards and it wasn't until a very important visitor disturbed them that they parted.

"I'm sorry, sir" said Munk jumping back from Demeter as he looked at his father, "I didn't see you coming in"

"Not losing your touch, I hope?" said Old Deuteronomy as he smiled at his son warmly

"No, sir"

"How are you, Munkustrap?"

"Fine, sir. Everything's fine"

"Fine?" asked the old tom as he turned to look around the junkyard. He had noticed that things weren't quite as they should be when he had come in quietly and taking a proper look now could see he was right. "I'm not sure if this is what I would call fine, certainly not by your standards"

Munk looked shifty as he tried to think of what to say in return. When he was silent for too long a moment Demeter piped up for him.

"You're right, sir, things are not fine"

"I thought not" said Old Deuteronomy as he climbed up to the tyre the other two stood upon. "Thank you for being honest, my dear. Now, tell me what's the matter, I'm sure it can't be as bad as it seems"

Munk and Demeter exchanged awkward glances and tried to find something in each other's expressions they could use to soften the blow of the situation. It was Munk who spoke up first and as he started to tell his father what had gone on recently the old tom's expression slowly changed from one of it's usual kind, friendliness to one of stern uncertainly and worry.

When it was done the three stood there without speaking as the tension amongst them gently dissipated. It was a lot for the old tom to hear all in one go and for a moment Munk worried that his dear old dad might not be able to take it. With a disappointed sigh Old Deuteronomy eventually spoke up grimly,

"How many weeks did you say Mistoffelees has been missing?"

"Four or five…I think," said Munk as he tried to remember just how long Misto had been away. He looked at his mate briefly for backup but she just shrugged.

"I see" continued the old tom, "and there has been no sign of him at all?"

"No, sir"

"Oh dear me…how is Rum Tum Tugger dealing with it?"

"Not well, sir, he looks dreadful and barely says a word to anyone. He spends all his time out of the junkyard looking for him but it's never any use. He comes back looking haggard and exhausted and it's really awful to see him this way"

"Is he here now?"

"I think so" said Munk looking across to his brother's den and then at Demeter for reassurance. She nodded and so Munk carried on, "Yes, he must be although I don't think he's come out tonight yet"

"Right then" said Old Deuteronomy firmly, "it's time I fixed this mess." As he said that he turned and begun to make his way down from the tyre. Munk leapt forward to help him on his way and couldn't shake the need to protest due to his father's age.

"Sir…dad, what are you going to do?"

"I'm going to put this tribe back together whatever it takes. I shan't stand by and watch it fall apar-" he stopped as he saw Bomba emerge across the clearing and stand there looking both shy and ashamed. The old tom eyed her up warily as he took in the sight of the new Bombalurina not looking like the one he'd come to know before. She was definitely larger now and as they looked at each other a strange kind of tension hung in the air for the queen. She was carrying the kitten of the leader's son and she was almost scared as she wondered what he had to say to her. He could throw her out of the junkyard if he wanted and she didn't hesitate to assume that he might do just that. Timidly, she stepped forward slowly and bowed to him in the deepest respect she could muster.

To Old Deuteronomy Bomba looked absolutely pitiful and he felt incredibly sorry for her as he looked upon her. He understood how she must have been feeling but he was nowhere near as disappointed in her as he was in Tugger. Above all he knew Bomba needed to know that he was not feeling hostile towards her and he began to walk towards her with a reserved warmness.

As the old tom began to come towards her Bomba felt an incredible nervousness rise within. She had no idea what to do but she certainly felt like it was a fight or flight situation. Deciding it would be highly disrespectful to disappear when he was so obviously coming for her and that putting up her defences was just as rude she decided to stay where she was with her eyes to the ground and wait for the severe reprimand she sensed she was about to receive. She had to suppress the need to shiver as he approached and stood right in front of her waiting for her to look up. Timidly, she took a deep breath and slowly brought her eyes up to try and meet his. In the end she found she couldn't and simply focused on the area around his chest as she tried to look as proper as she could.

Old Deuteronomy hated this. He didn't want to make her uneasy but that is certainly what he could see he was doing. A great wave of sympathy then overcame him and his face softened into a kindness that only he could express. Bringing his arms up he stepped forward and put his paws on her shoulders making the red queen look up the rest of the way into his eyes. Without saying anything he simply smiled down at her and showed her he was not angry and although it put Bomba slightly more at ease she still did not speak.

A few moments passed with the two of them looking at each other trying to figure out the other's feelings. Eventually Old Deuteronomy spoke to Bomba,

"You look well. You have a glow about you" was all he said

After a few seconds Bomba smiled and let out the breath she had been holding due to her nerves.

"Thank you, sir, I've been trying my hardest to do the right things although I'm not entirely sure what they are"

The old tom chuckled, "I'm sure Jennyanydots has been mothering you"

"Yes, sir"

"That's good, she's always incredibly attentive to the queens who fall pregnant"

Bomba was quiet for a moment before she spoke again, "I'm sorry, sir, I never meant to have a kitten…like this"

The old tom gave her a knowing look, "You mean with Rum Tum Tugger?"

"Yes, sir. It was an accident and we never meant to do it and we never meant to drive Misto away and I'm so sorry and-"

"Shh, my dear, it's alright" he cut in, "While I know it's not ideal I'm sure that most of the blame lies with my son. It is, after all, his way…" said Old Deuteronomy uneasily.

"Well, sir, we can't really remember what happened so we suppose it's more of a fifty-fifty kind of situation"

"Hmm…well, even so, it's happened and it can't un-happen. I suppose we must simply carry on and hope to do what's right from this point onwards while not forgetting to learn from our experiences. Do you feel you've learned from what's happened?"

Bomba nodded gently, "Yes, sir, unquestionably"

"Good. Now, run along my dear and stay healthy"

Bomba smiled weakly. The feeling of relief that washed over her was wonderful as she thought she had been in for a real telling off. The fact that her leader had been so incredibly kind was more than she ever could have hoped for and her heart leaped for joy. At that she walked around the leader and walked towards where she could see Demeter. The black and gold queen on the tyre smiled curiously as she saw her friend come towards her beaming with delight.

Old Deuteronomy watched her go for a few moments and then turned back around to focus on his younger son's den. Fixing his expression to its prior sternness he started to make his way forward and confront his son that was missing his mate. He wasn't quite sure how he was going to talk to him but he knew he had to do something. He knew Tugger well enough to get him to talk so maybe that was the best thing – despite how hard it was going to be to get him to do so.

As he started to ascend the junk outside the den he was stopped by a clattering behind him and a few yelp's of surprise from some of the members of the tribe. Turning around he saw across the junkyard Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer supporting the psychics Coricopat and Tantomile where they sat. The twins seemed to be focused on something that wasn't actually there and as such they seemed to have lost function briefly.

'_Oh, what now?'_ thought the old tom as he turned around properly and started to go over to them. As he went he saw many of the other Jellicles gather around and pay close attention to their psychic tribe mates. The pair seemed to be in a daze but also looked like they were straining themselves to see something. Old Deuteronomy looked in the same direction as them but when he found there was nothing of particular interest he looked back and puzzled. As he got close he moved his way through the gathering and spoke to no one in particular.

"What's going on here?"

"I think they're seeing something, sir," said Jellylorum as she helped Rumpleteazer support the striped queen.

"Any idea what?"

"I'm afraid not, they haven't said anything yet"

Old Deuteronomy stooped low and caught they eyes of Tantomile, then Coricopat and then back to the female twin. Very gently he spoke to her,

"Tantomile, what is it? What do you see?"

A few moments later the queen spoke to him,

"It's magic, sir, very faint magic"

"But we can't quite tell what it is" piped up Coricopat. The pair continued to speak alternately making the Jellicles look back and forth between them,

"It's a magic we've felt before…"

"…but it's so faint we can't tell exactly what it is…"

"…it's so weak…"

"…but it's getting closer…"

"…slowly…"

"…It's…there," said the psychic tom pointing intently towards the junkyard entrance. The Jellicles all turned their heads to look at what the twins were directing towards. When they saw nothing was there they started to turn back although Victoria kept staring fiercely. She felt something too but had no idea what it was.

"There's nothing there?" said Old Deuteronomy, "are you sure it's that way?"

"Yes! Yes!" they said together and pointed more angrily, "It's there, look!"

Again everyone turned.

"Keep looking, it's right there!"

The whole tribe watched in silence for a long time before something very faint finally caught their eyes. Way at the other end of the street outside the junkyard there was a tiny shadow moving very slowly. At first it looked like nothing but then it became too distinctive not to be something. Everyone focused on it silently as it continued to move towards the junkyard and after a few minutes Victoria stood up inquisitively. She took a step forward and then turned to reach towards the leader. Old Deuteronomy gestured for her to carry on and she very timidly started to creep forward. She didn't get very far before she was stopped in her tracks by Munk stepping in front of her. He eyed her up intently before she stood back and he took over for her. He wasn't about to let a queen like her investigate something that was potentially dangerous and he gestured for Alonzo to follow him. Carefully the silver tabby walked forward and out of the junkyard to make his way up the street towards the strange apparition. The air was so tense he could practically hear his paws making explosions as they make contact with the hard concrete at every step he took and as he made his way along the pavement he saw the shadow had fur and was whimpering softly. Whatever it was looked filthy and ragged and he stopped cold as he looked upon the odd thing. He waited for a while as he watched it come closer and then very tentatively begun walking forward again when he saw flecks of white on the furry being. It was a cat, that was unmistakeable and he quickly started to look at it more closely.

With the upmost care he very gently lowered himself when he was within feet of the poor creature and paused to examine it. It was a tom, that was for sure and he seemed strangely familiar to Munk as he looked on. He seemed to have a few of the distinctions of the cat he had been looking for but it couldn't be him, could it? This tom's coat was terribly dirty and he was so incredibly thin it seemed impossible that this tom could be the cat that had been missing. Surely Misto would take much better care of himself regardless of where he was so in the end Munk felt incredibly confused over who it was he was looking at. More to the point he was more concentrated on the fact that this particular tom sounded dreadful as he tried to pull himself along. He was whimpering very softly and sounded quite ill as he tried to move. He looked as if he was in pain too and the protector really felt he ought to help despite feeling wary to assist the strange cat. Bending lower he spoke very softly,

"Who are you?"

In a sickening, dizzy haze the pitiful tom looked up from the ground and straight away Munk jumped back in shock. There on the ground shaking slightly lay the horrifying mess that was was once the Magical Mister Mistoffelees. It was a sight that shook Munk to his very core and he brought his paw to his mouth in disbelief as he took in the sight of the terrible wreck of a cat before him.

"Oh, Misto…" breathed Munk as he staggered back and supported himself against a lamppost, "What's happened to you?"

Misto was too weak to talk and simply let his head flop down on the ground as he started to shiver more. Straight away Munk turned around and shouted,

"Alonzo, get here now!"

The black and white tom following Munk didn't hesitate in sprinting over and as he saw the poor little Misto laying face down on the ground he reacted in a similar way to how Munk had only a few moments before. He was snapped out of it quickly when Munk started snapping orders.

"Help me pick him up! Be gentle, he's very weak!"

"Munk?" whispered Misto quietly as the pair started to fumble around in lifting him.

"Shh, don't speak," said the silver tabby frantically, "You're safe now, everything's going to be okay"

The pair carefully picked him up with Munk at Misto's head and Alonzo holding his legs and together they carried him the last few metres towards the junkyard the tux had been missing from for weeks. Neither one could begin to make sense of what could have possibly landed Misto in such a terrible state but at that moment they didn't care. They needed to get him the urgent care they could see he needed and once back across the threshold of the junkyard entrance Munk started barking orders,

"Jenny! Jelly! It's Misto! He needs help now!"

Surprised yelps of 'Misto?' radiated from the crowd and instantly the cats started to rush over to see the friend they had missed. The sight that greeted them was shocking and many jumped back in horror. Misto looked like he was on the brink of death and to look upon him in such a terrible state drove many of them to despair. It took Jenny a long moment to clear her head since she was so stunned and only started to function properly when Munk's shouts jolted her out of it.

"Bring him to my den!" she commanded and straight away Misto was hurtled across the clearing towards the place she had said. Jenny could tell this was not going to be a pleasant or easy experience and couldn't shake the horrible feeling that helping Misto now was beyond her. It distressed her nearly to the point of tears but for the sake of everyone else she forced herself to keep it together. She would do all she could; she just hoped that it was good enough.

Misto barely knew what was going on. He knew he was being carried but the voices he heard were not so clear and he felt he was quickly heading for unconsciousness again. The last thing he saw as he tried to look around were the stars in the sky. Somehow they seemed a little brighter now that he was in the loving care of the Jellicles once more although he barely realised it. It was unclear; however, if that was going to be enough to bring him back from circling the drain so closely.

* * *

Tugger had remained laying down for what seemed like hours. Every time he tried to find the energy to push himself off of the bed he simply couldn't think of a reason to do so and lost the drive to do it. He wished he had one but Misto – his dear Misto – was nowhere to be seen. As such he just didn't know why he was trying anymore and felt there was nothing else to do but give up.

He intended on staying there for the foreseeable future but naturally his body did protest. Like all cats Tugger was susceptible to natural bodily functions and pretty soon felt the pressing need to empty his bladder. He tried to ignore it but it wasn't long before it became desperate and was forced to make a decision between getting up for relief or going right there on the bed. While he may have lost his drive for living he wasn't stupid so begrudgingly he started to move his arms into a position where they could push him upwards. They protested as he forced them into life but eventually he put himself in a sitting position. Slowly he got up from the bed and lumbered over towards the doorway. As he neared he caught sight of himself in a mirror and looked himself up and down. He did not look good. His fur needed brushing and his mane was desperate for some attention. He didn't find himself at all sexually appealing like he had done before and he absolutely hated that. He generally looked sloppy but he didn't sneer like he usually would in a situation like that. While he once might have cared of nothing more than his appearance he had long given up on that now that Misto was missing. He had changed so much since falling in love with Misto and he could tell it was for the better. Misto had turned him from being a self-obsessed layabout into a caring, loving tom that he was so proud to be. Now that he was no longer in his life he was back in the same position that he had been in before and he really didn't like that. Come to think of it he wasn't even sure he could become that self-obsessed again if he tried since he'd learnt that the important things in life are much greater than appearance. Instead of sneering he almost felt the need to smile arise within him despite his crushing sadness. At least Misto had left a lasting impression on him and Tugger took some comfort in the fact that he still had a small part of his mate with him. In a way.

Bringing himself back to the task in hand he felt his bladder twinge slightly and carried on out of the den. The need to go was becoming unbearable now and as such when he got outside he didn't realise that everyone was gathered around the exterior of Jenny's den. Nor did he notice many of them bolting up when they saw him exit his den and run off over the junk.

When he returned feeling slightly more relieved he directed himself back towards his den. As he went he felt each of the cats that were across the clearing fix their stares at him and he felt low to think that they were judging him so much for his shoddy appearance. Stopping, he turned to them and gave them a falsely hard stare.

"What?" he said in a low growl, "What is it?"

Nobody said anything but many did look at those next to them questioningly. Nobody knew how to tell him what had happened not ten minutes ago and as a result they just continued in their silly gawking. It made Tugger a little angry as well as feeling more embarrassed.

"Guys, I'm not in the mood" he said hastily, "Could you just tell me what's happening"

He thought it was quite nice of himself to speak so calmly despite how much he wanted to be short tempered and brash. It was, after all, his way and it felt strange for him not to be doing so. When he still received no answer he decided to throw caution to the wind and be an arsehole like the good old well-known Tugger used to be.

"Everlasting! Would you all stop looking at me like that? You all look fucking ridiculous! You know what? Fuck you all! I don't give a fuck what you're all doing!"

As he turned to storm back to his den it was actually Bomba that ran forward and grabbed him. Turning again he was not at all pleased to see it was her,

"Oh what do you want?" he said exasperatedly.

The red queen pleaded with her eyes and spoke to him as gently as she could,

"He's back, Tug. He's right inside" she said as she pointed towards Jenny and Skimble's den. Tugger looked at her as if she had just said everything in a foreign language and then shook his head slightly. In a husky, strained voice he replied,

"What?"

"He's in the den. He came back"

"Are you sure?"

"I saw it with my own eyes, we all did" she said gesturing towards the other Jellicles that stood around her. Tugger looked and saw they all nodded feebly.

How could this be? How could Misto have actually come back just out of the blue? Surely he must have had a reason to return from wherever he had been. Maybe someone had brought him back. Maybe…something, this just didn't make sense and Tugger could barely comprehend that the cat he thought he had lost forever was actually inside the den just a few feet away from him. He was sure that he'd well and truly lost him and he had been mourning their relationship like it was something that was always going to be gone. It didn't seem fair that he'd been allowed to think that if in fact Misto really was inside. Even so, at that point he didn't care about what was flying through his mind, he was simply dumbfounded that his amazing mate was just a few steps away and without realising he started to walk towards the doorway. As he went cats stepped out of his way silently and let him past. The moment simply didn't have a feeling it was so strange and Tugger almost found himself in a hazy kind of delirium that just kept him moving forward.

The seconds seemed to drag as they went by but soon he was standing right outside the den. Taking a deep breath he tried to prepare himself for the fact he was going to see his mate again – if only he had been warned of what he could expect to see. Since he was not a smile started to creep onto his face mixed with a spectacular sense of wonder and humility. It would soon be ridden.

Stepping through the doorway he found himself as he expected inside Jenny and Skimble's den where at first nothing seemed out of the ordinary. Looking around he noticed the many cats he had known for years including Demeter, Alonzo, Skimble, Jelly and of course Munk and Old Deuteronomy. He looked at each of them individually with an inquisitive expression before moving onto Jenny as she hunched over something across the den with her back turned to him. Upon his entry she turned her head to look at him and once she saw it was he an even grimmer expression crossed her than had been there before. She briefly straightened up and seemed to try and convey sympathy as she looked upon the bedraggled form of Tugger stand before her and thinned her lips for that reason in a kind of non-smile.

No one had said anything when Tugger stepped in which put him quite one edge yet it wasn't long before he found out exactly why. Looking further he started to notice what it was Jenny had been huddled over and as it dawned upon him he felt his heart start to beat faster and his knees grow weaker. Finding it hard to hold it together he pressed himself to carry on. What he saw was absolutely the worst sight he could ever have hoped to see in his life and it struck sheer terror into his very soul. There, right in front of him lying motionless on the bed across the den was the utterly horrifying sight of his rough, filthy, emaciated mate, Misto. At that moment though he was not the Misto he had come to know and love. He was in fact the furthest thing from the Magical Mister Mistoffelees that Tugger could possibly imagine and straight away he started to tear up as he looked upon him.

Tugger nearly fell from the shock and then staggered forward in utter disbelief as he took in the sight of Misto lying there. He tried to speak but soon found that all that was there to come out was just incomprehensible gibberish that wouldn't have been any use to anyone. Still, he let some of it loose and started to sob quietly as he fell down on his knees at he side of the bed.

"Oh, Misto…Misto, Misto, Misto…" he sobbed as he looked at his awful mate. The tux's fur was dirty and matted in places with filth and grime and his lily-white chest had become grey and ugly. He noticed Jenny had already managed to place a drip in his arm and was currently in the process of affixing the bag above her patient in a way that Tugger didn't care to look at. His general sparkle had completely disappeared and worst of all his utterly beautiful face looked strained, exhausted and bore the signs of incredible pain. It was truly a soul-destroying image and Tugger wished so desperately that it was not one that he ever wanted to have seen. He never wanted to see Misto in that way and up until that point he knew he could barely have imagined it. He knew Misto would never have allowed himself to fall to such a terrible state and he wished he knew whom this cat laying before him really was.

Knowing there was no other cat in the world that this could be he rested his forehead against Misto's and rubbed against him gently. He rested his paws on Misto's arms and scooped them round the tortured tux to hold him tightly. He could feel his shallow breaths move in and out shakily and he hated how fragile the tom felt in his paws as he gripped him. He felt cold and the maned tom could practically feel the tux's heartbeat shake his entire body as it thumped gently inside him. Very slowly – as if he were being careful not to break him – Tugger pushed his paws further behind Misto and started to pull him upwards into his arms. He could hear Jenny protest but he didn't care at that point, he needed to feel his mate close to him again and he wasn't about to let anyone get in the way of that. Very slowly he drew Misto into his arms and held him tightly against his chest. Misto lay motionless in his mate's embrace and his head flopped back lazily as he maintained his unconscious state.

Tugger kissed him firmly on the cheek and then began to cry into his fur at the neck and pleaded internally that he would be alright. He couldn't bear to see Misto go again now that he had him back and he now felt more frightened than ever to lose him than he ever had done before. Most of all he felt so incredibly guilty again for having done this to Misto and for seeing him into such a state of peril once more. This was his fault, he had driven Misto to this point of ruin and it split his heart into two jagged pieces for what seemed like the thousandth time. Never before had he felt such a horrible mixture of guilt, relief and shame.

He then started to cry loudly into his mate's fur and managed to squeeze out one thing that everyone in the den heard,

"Oh, Misto. How did I let you end up like this again?"

The other Jellicles that were in the den just looked on quietly as the maned tom cried over his lost mate. Tugger had never known such sorrow and he would have given his life to bring the poor tux back from the brink of the abyss. He loved his mate but he was so scared that it wasn't going to be enough to save him. What else did he have though? Love was all he could give at that point, it had to enough. Hadn't it?

**Well, at least he's home now. Whether he survives is another issue but at least that. I hope y'all enjoyed this one. Please review you bunch of lovelies! X**


	13. A Lot Of Cat Food

**Hope you like this one. I've tried to put a few bits in that tug on the ol' heart strings. Let me know what you think afterwards. It is a long one so you might to stop for a meal break or something. It's nearly 13,000 words so this is a fair warning that you're in for the long haul. **

**I have planned the end now so hopefully it won't take me too long to write it. I think you're gonna like it but we'll just have to wait and see.**

**I think Whiskas is a brand of cat food every country has, right? Well, if not then it's a brand of cat food that's sold in the UK and is probably the most popular. Might seem strange that I'm mentioning it now but you'll see how it fits in…**

**Love Is No Fairytale**

**Chapter 13**

**A Lot Of Cat Food**

When one is waiting time can seem to do a great many strange things. Some periods may seem to fly past leaving the individual with an odd sense of wonder and weirdly enough, accomplishment. At other periods time may seem to crawl so slowly that the prospect of pulling one's own hair out seems like a useful option for making it pass. Whatever the case, waiting around for something to happen is usually accompanied by an undying tension and some kind of desperation and as they linger they often start to annoy in a similar way that a cloud of mosquitoes might persistently hover around one's head. You might be able to keep them away for a short time but pretty soon they'll be back and the desperate clawing for any method of dispersing them becomes more frantic.

The strange thing was that Tugger didn't seem to exhibit these emotions as he waited, he simply sat beside the bed his seriously sick mate lay upon waiting silently for anything to change. He had been doing that ever since he had stopped crying which had been long after the other cats in the den aside from Jenny and Skimble had left and the morning light had started to bathe the junkyard. In a way it wasn't entirely surprising that Tugger was behaving in this way, he was after all the most curious of cats and never played by anyone else's rules. It was fairly disconcerting though as this kind of behaviour wasn't at all Tuggerish; he would usually cause such a scene and make an incredible fuss over the tiniest of issues. Now, he looked broken and as if his life depended on his mate's recovery which unbeknownst to everyone else it did – metaphorically at least.

Despite his lamentable state – to put it very lightly – Misto was being well looked after. Jenny had done her absolute best in providing him with every necessary treatment she knew of and the tux seemed to be holding steady. It was rather a shame that the steadiness held was the terrible condition but the tabby queen was happy to accept that he wasn't getting any worse – as far as she could see.

Tugger didn't notice this, all he saw was his sleeping mate looking as if he were in pain but also very weak and it did nothing to help him feel better. He was so glad to have Misto back but he simply did not know how to take him being in such a poor state of health. The initial burst of emotion had now subsided and the shock of seeing Misto this way had well and truly set in. He held the tux's paw ever so tightly as if letting go might let him float away and he stared intently at his face. He had a strange look that was both intense and distant and it made Jenny feel ever so sorry for him as she watched from her position across the den. He had been that way for a long time now and he was gradually looking more terrible. So many mixed emotions seemed to pour from him including despair, hurt, hope, guilt and bafflement to name a few. None, though, were more powerful than the pure, unhindered love he so bountifully displayed. There was an unmistakeable look of sheer devotion in his eyes as he looked at Misto and despite the worry that hung in the air it was warming to see him look in some way completed again. Tugger's missing half had clearly been returned to him and it was as if he were lost in thought in trying to think of a way to put them back together again. There was some truth to that but it was more of a fleeting thought to the maned tom as his mind was well and truly gripped with the unmitigated shock of seeing Misto so poorly. As he scanned the tux's body it made him feel positively sick to see him so thin and without his usual gleam. He knew it was Misto but it really didn't look like him and Tugger wished so desperately he could have his beautiful mate back to the way he was. He would have given anything but knowing that in reality he couldn't made him feel even more guilty that all of this was his fault. How could he begin to apologize for doing this to Misto? There didn't seem to be any gesture that could be big enough and it ripped him apart to think that the time he spent with Misto now might be the last time he got to spend with him before the tux broke them up once and for all. How could he go on then? How could he live if Misto wasn't his and he wasn't Misto's? It no longer seemed possible and he knew so deeply that he couldn't carry on in that case.

Bringing Misto's paw up to his mouth he closed his eyes and kissed it softly before rubbing it against his cheek. All he could do was pray that Misto could somehow forgive him for his crime despite how impossible it seemed. A short while later he let Misto's paw go and laid his head down on the side of the bed to rest himself for a moment. He only intended to rest but without realising it soon turned into sleep and the den was bathed in silence again. When Jenny came in from another part of the den she smiled weakly as she looked upon the sight of the fallen Misto with his lover by his side. It was both warming and heart-breaking and she too hoped that somehow they could patch things up. They seemed to be a couple with such a romantic back-story that it would be such a shame if they couldn't be fixed. While she may still have thought very lowly of Tugger for doing what he had done to split them apart in the first place she nonetheless couldn't shake the nag within her that told her these two needed to be together. Damn her romantic heart!

Feeling more sympathetic she pulled a blanket out from nearby and took it over to the sleeping toms. Very carefully she draped it around Tugger and checked to see if Misto was doing any better. When she found all was well she decided to leave them to it. There was nothing anybody could do until Misto came around and she knew he'd been in safe hands with Tugger there. Well, she hoped.

She then left the den to try and find Mungo and Teazer since despite her strong scruples she had tasked them with retrieving some items for Misto's recovery that were not possible to come by through honest means by a cat. She just hoped the kittens wouldn't find out about the temporary relaxing of her morals.

* * *

An hour passed or maybe two before a gentle shifting woke Tugger. At first he opened his eyes groggily and didn't move his head but then when he felt something moving next to him his eyes shot open and he picked himself up quickly. Straight away he looked up to Misto's head and saw the smaller tom rolling it gently from side to side as if he were trying to come to but couldn't quite manage. Gently Tugger brought his paws up and placed one on Misto's chest and the other around the back of his head to support him. Very softly he spoke to his tux below,

"Misto? It's alright Misto, I'm here"

The tux scrunched up his face slightly before relaxing again and managing to crack open his eyes. Very slowly they fluttered open and he looked out as his vision slowly came back to him. At first all he could see was a blotchy haze but soon the clouds started to clear and he could make out shapes. As the seconds kept ticking on he heard the gentle echo of someone speaking to him and as his vision became clearer still he could see he was lying down and someone was leaning over him. Blinking a few more times his senses started up properly again and he soon found it was Tugger that was looking at him – and what a look it was. The maned tom looked so incredibly apprehensive and eager at the same time and it took Misto a few moments more to start putting the pieces of the puzzle together. Thinking back he tried to remember the last thing before he went out and vaguely recalled being carried somewhere after having dragged himself along the cold, hard ground. He assumed this – which he now saw to be Jenny and Skimble's den – was where he had been carried to but who by and when was still a mystery. There had been stars though, hadn't there? He distinctly remembered stars right before he blacked out and looking to the side slightly he could now see daylight streaming in from the doorway. He must have been sleeping for a while if it was now light outside and moaned quietly as his body started to ache in the way that he remembered it had. With it he scrunched up his face again in discomfort and this prompted a very flustered reaction from the big tom that cradled his head,

"What's wrong? Does it hurt? What do you need darling? Oh, please! Tell me what you need! Anything!"

Opening his eyes again Misto rested his line of sight on Tugger and saw how upset he looked. He had no idea where to start so he simply remained quiet for a few moments before he managed to bring a useful thought forward.

"Tugger?" he asked croakily

Tugger sniffed and continued to look straight in his eyes, "Yes, darling?"

Misto looked at him with a softer expression and breathed heavily but slowly,

"Tugger."

"It's okay, you're okay now" said Tugger with a smile and droopy eyes. Misto continued to breath heavily for a little while longer before he managed to say something else,

"Water…please"

Straight away Tugger reached across to where an aerosol lid filled with water had been placed and gently brought it to Misto's mouth while supporting his head. The small tux was still a little hazy but did his best to lap at the makeshift cup. The first few moments went okay but then Misto took too big a sip and started to cough and splutter as his airway was filled. In a flash Tugger had put the lid back and had pulled Misto up to pat him on the back gently.

"Cough it up dear, it's okay"

A few minutes later Misto managed to breathe properly again and Tugger very slowly put him back down while keeping a firm eye on him. Misto still seemed to be quite groggy and he was noticeably uncomfortable. He was still so thin and it seemed to Tugger that he might break if he were handled to roughly.

"What's going on? How did I get here?"

"They said you came home like…like this"

"…I did?" When Tugger nodded Misto continued, "…I did."

"How are you feeling?"

"Bad…" was all the tux said as he looked down to his wrist which had something sticking into it. Blinking in the dim light he could see it was a needle with some kind of tube coming out of it. He followed that tube to the roof above him where he could see what looked like a plastic shopping bag filled with some kind of fluid. Puzzling for a moment he then felt a twinge of fascination spark within him as he figured out what Jenny had managed to rig up. _'Clever cat…'_ thought Misto as he realised the tabby queen had made some sort of intravenous device; he'd have to remember to congratulate her later for her clever thinking. Now, though, there were more pressing thoughts starting to pop up and he turned his head back to the worried tom that sat next to the bed. When the reality of the situation started to hit him he felt his blank expression start to become darker and he ended up with a look of judgement on his face as he stared at his mate. It was enough to show Tugger that Misto had not forgotten what had driven him to this state and straight away he flicked his eyes down in shame. Neither one spoke for a long time as the feeling in the air said more than words ever could. Misto had no idea where to begin and he wasn't even sure if he was ready to talk to Tugger about them yet. He couldn't remember what he'd decided – if anything at all – during his time away as his memory was so fuzzy. He didn't know what any of his feelings were trying to tell him anymore; all he did know was that what Tugger had done had not gone away over time and that was the worst thing about all of this.

Taking a deep, laboured breath Misto opened his mouth to speak again. When no words came he simply closed it and just continued to stare. Tugger knew there was nothing to begin with but he couldn't allow this silence to carry on. In the end he started with all he could think of,

"I looked for you every day. There wasn't a minute I wasn't worrying about you…"

Misto continued to stare and so Tugger carried on,

"…I'm so happy you came back. I've missed you so much"

"Is that supposed to make it better?" asked Misto quietly. Tugger looked down,

"No…but I have missed you, Misty, I need you…I can't live without you"

"Don't call me Misty…"

Tugger looked back up and smiled weakly, "Sorry"

Again, silence hung in the air for a few moments before Tugger continued,

"I still love you, Misto, I never stopped loving you"

"It seems like you did"

Tugger's eyes widened and he spoke more firmly but with the same quietness, "Never! How could you think that? I'll never stop loving you!"

"Then why did you do it?"

"I told you…it was a mistake"

"Mistakes can be made right, how do you expect to fix this?"

Tugger was quiet for a moment before replying, "In any way I can…I'll do anything, just name it"

Misto shook his head weakly, "I don't know what you can do…I don't know how to fix this…you don't know how to fix this…what is there to do?"

"Please don't say that, this…you and I, what we've got is too special to lose"

"Got…or had?" asked Misto looking at Tugger making him look down once more and grab Misto's paw.

"Don't throw me away, Misto. I need you"

"I need you too…" said the smaller tom making Tugger feel a twinge of hope and look up expectantly, "…but you threw me away when you slept with Bomba"

"What are you saying?" asked Tugger shakily

"I don't know…I need more time to think…"

"Don't close the door on me Misto, please! I know I did wrong but I promise I'll never do it ever again. I'll always love you, there's no one else in the world for me"

Looking up at him Misto could see Tugger was being genuine; there was so much hope in those pleading eyes that Misto couldn't help but feel moved. Tugger really did seem to be sorry; so why then was his head telling him something different than his heart? Scratch that, he knew why. It was because what Tugger had done was way more than surface deep, he'd come to realise that what seemed like a long time ago now. Why couldn't he just allow himself to get past this mess? Scratch that too, he knew why. It was because he had given himself entirely to Tugger and the tom had figuratively spat on him. He couldn't let that go despite how much he desperately wished he could. He needed his Tugger, but his heart wouldn't let him have him. He hated himself for that. He hated Tugger for that. But he still loved Tugger so much, what was he to do?

Raising his paw to touch the bigger tom's face Tugger leant into the soft touch and purred very, very quietly at the gesture. Together they shared one brief moment of love – something they had missed so desperately in the past weeks – before Misto dropped his paw back to his side and looked away.

"Can you send Jenny in, please?" asked Misto cutting Tugger off and turning his head to the other side of the pillow. Tugger thought about trying to carry on but he didn't want to force Misto to continue when he didn't want to. He was still so weak and he didn't want to hurt him anymore than he already had done. It felt good to be touched by him again though, the feeling was truly spectacular and he still felt the tingle on his cheek where the smaller tom had caressed him. Reluctantly he got up and started to walk away. Just as he was about to leave the den he turned and said the words he so desperately wished he could get Misto to believe once more,

"I love you, Misto, with all my heart"

When he received no supply he turned back and left. Misto was left alone and a few moments later he turned to look at the doorway where Tugger had just been. Almost silently he whispered,

"I love you too…I just don't know if it's enough"

Closing his eyes he tried to think about anything else aside from how much he loved Tugger and how much that still hurt. It proved far more difficult than he could have imagined. In the back of his mind he supposed he always knew seeing Tugger again would make him yearn to be back with him once more. If only he knew of a way for that to happen.

* * *

Outside the den, Tugger stood for a moment with his eyes closed. He felt so messed up inside and before when he thought maybe things were going to be alright he was now left with so much doubt it nearly made him feel woozy. He had to find a place to clear his head and after a moment, along with a quick nod to Jenny to let her know Misto was awake he started to make his way across the clearing. At first he headed towards his den but when he got to the doorway he found he just kept walking. He soon made his way over the junk and off into the other parts of the junkyard and as he went he didn't realise he was being watched by a particular pregnant queen who could see just how down he really looked. She knew she was the last one he'd probably want to see but he definitely needed a friend right now, and they had agreed to put their differences aside for a while, hadn't they? Maybe she could at least offer him something else to think about other than how sad he was over Misto.

After a few minutes of tossing the idea around she steadily pushed herself up, took a moment to catch her breath from lifting the growing kitten weight and delicately made her way in the direction Tugger had just left in. Hopefully she wouldn't cause another fight; after all it probably wouldn't be healthy for either of them at this stage.

* * *

As she entered the den Jenny looked across to her poor patient and smiled gently as she saw he was awake again. She had to suppress the need to be the mother hen she was so prone acting like as she knew it probably wouldn't be in anyone's best interest – at least not yet. She knew she could start bossing cats around when Misto was better so she quietly kept clam and gentle as she went over to him.

The small tux looked up at her as he heard her approach and straight away she could see his eyes were a little red and puffy.

"Oh my dear, are you okay?"

Misto closed his eyes and nodded before bringing his paws up to rub at them.

"I'm okay. What's going on Jenny?"

"I wish I knew dear, you showed up out of the blue and in such a state that none of us have any idea what could have landed you like that."

"Oh…"

"What on earth has happened to you, dear? I hate to say it but you look positively dreadful"

"I…well…I haven't been doing do well…"

"I can see that" said Jenny putting her hands on her hips, "What happened?"

Misto was quiet for a while before he responded, "I don't know. It all seems so hazy…"

Before Jenny could respond she was given a fright when Misto shuddered violently, clasped his paws to his stomach and tried to double over. Straight away she lay her paws on him and tried to get him to lie straight again,

"What is it? Where does it hurt?" she asked more frantically

"My tummy!" said Misto forcefully, "It's been hurting like this for days!"

"Have you eaten anything strange, dear?"

"No, I haven't eaten at all!"

Jenny was about to question him not having eaten a single thing but then as she took in his thin frame again she could see it was the truth.

"Right. You need to eat something dear, I imagine it's hunger pains that are getting you"

"I'm not hungry though"

"You won't feel hungry, you've gone past that point it seems. You need to eat something, poppet, or you'll waste away like you already seem to have done a little bit"

"Will that make it stop hurting?" asked Misto opening his big blue eyes up wide with pained hope.

"I hope so," said the tabby queen as she got back up and went across to the doorway and looked out.

"What's going on?' asked Misto quietly from his position on the bed

"I'm just looking to see if Mungo and Teazer have gotten back yet. I sent them to get some things"

"Steal?"

Jenny's face darkened for a moment before she replied, "…this is a special case"

"Jenny…" said Misto with shock in his voice making the tabby queen blush under her fur a little.

"You be quiet, it's for your sake," she said leaving the den momentarily. When she came back she was dragging a sack with Mungo and Teazer trailing behind. The notorious pair smiled jauntily when they saw Misto and ambled over to see their fallen friend.

"Alright, Misto?" they said together before plonking down on opposite sides of his bed.

"Hi, guys," replied the tux softly with a tender smile

"Feelin' better yet?" asked Teazer

"Not yet"

"You scared us right proper, you did. What's got you fallin' down like that anyway?"

"I…uh…haven't been eating," said Misto unsteadily as he started to feel a familiar little nag at the back of his mind that made him think about a not-so-healthy herb.

"Ain't eating? What you on about?"

"I just haven't been eating, I've…forgotten to"

"How do you forget to eat?" asked Mungo giving his sister a silly look

"I just…" Misto flicked his eyes back and forth momentarily before he started grasping for any explanation other than his spell on catnip, "…what with Tugger and me being so…you know, I've just been thinking about that all the time"

The criminal duo smiled down at him gently before Teazer spoke up,

"You proper love him, don't you?"

Misto honestly didn't know what to say. They were right but there was so much more to it than that and he felt cornered all of a sudden. When they saw him lost for words they looked at each other and decided maybe it was time for them to leave.

"We'll get out your hair now. Feel better" Mungo said before the two scampered off. Misto was left laying on the bed with two very distinct thoughts: 1) How did he really feel about Tugger?, and 2) The thought of catnip made him feel even more sick but he still could use a little.

Realising what he desired he quickly shook his head and tried to forget about that evil herb. It was what had landed him in this sorry state – that and his awful emotional state. He had to try and forget about the catnip but it was hard since he knew it could lighten pain for a little while. Still, he did his best to concentrate on something else and was relieved when Jenny came back over to him carrying a small dish.

"They couldn't get to the job soon enough when I told them it was for you" said Jenny as she sat down beside him.

"What?"

"Mungo and Teazer"

"Oh, right"

"Something on your mind, dear?" she asked raising an eyebrow

"No…well, just Tugger"

The queen gave him a sympathetic look, "One thing at a time dear, I'm sure that stupid boy can stand to be put down a few places on the list of priorities. Now, I asked those two to get something very special to help get you on the mend"

Misto just gazed up curiously as she lowered the dish into his eye line. Whatever was on it smelt wonderful and the tux could feel his mouth water in anticipation. What he saw when the contents of the dish came into view stunned him and he felt a smile creep across his lips as he saw what Jenny had sent for.

"What is that?"

"It's called Whiskas or something like that," she said as she handed it out to him, "It's food that housecats eat"

"Housecat food?" asked Misto excitedly

"Yes, dear, it looked like you needed it. Now, eat up. They managed to get ten or eleven cans of it for you"

Misto looked surprised, "I can't eat eleven cans!"

"Over the next week or so you will," she said both firmly but with a smile

"Jenny, I couldn't"

"You can and you will. Have you seen how thin you are? We need to get you good and fat if you're going to be healthy again"

"I'll end up like my dad!" said Misto feeling a giggle within him

"I'm sure you will, now eat up!"

Misto thought about protesting some more but Jenny simply gave him eyes that told him it would be a bad idea to try. With a happy smile Misto looked down at the wonderful looking food on the dish before him. When his stomach twinged from hunger he knew he couldn't starve himself anymore and he ravenously tucked into the meaty mixture. It wasn't long before it was all gone and instantly he felt better for having something inside him. As such, he was so content he couldn't stop a purr radiating from his chest and he blushed accordingly. Jenny just chuckled at his embarrassment and got up to get some more for him. As she walked across the den Misto spoke to her,

"Where did they get it from?"

"I don't know and I'd prefer not to" she said firmly, "I hate to encourage their stealing but this seemed like something I couldn't avoid"

"Thank you, Jenny"

"It's alright, my dear," she said as she came back with more. She gave it to Misto and he once again tucked in. As he ate, Jenny watched him and after a few moments a slightly sad look came over her.

"How did you end up like this again in the space of a year?"

Misto stopped and looked up at her,

"Sorry…" he said quietly

"It's alright, it's not your fault, it's just…it's such a shame"

"I wish none of it had happened, Jenny, I really wish it hadn't"

"I know."

The two stayed in silence for a few moments before Misto continued with his meal. They remained in silence until he was finished and looking a little brighter.

"Any more?" asked Jenny brightly

"I'm stuffed!" said Misto with a smile

"You'll have some more," she said getting up to open another can

"Jenny, I swear I couldn't!"

"No arguments, Mistoffelees! You'll eat this and that's that!"

Misto just lay down and chuckled. He could swear he was already looking a little fatter and was glad that the pain he had been feeling in his stomach was slowly subsiding. Overall, he was happy to be feeling better all around and was glad to forget about the crippling pain of his broken heart for a while.

* * *

Bomba struggled to carry on as she passed mound after mound of junk. Before she'd had this growing lump to carry around she never would have thought twice about it but now that she was feeling much heavier she realised that getting around wasn't quite as easy as it used to be. Stopping to catch her breath she reached her arms around to her back and stretched backwards as she looked around. Tugger was nowhere to be seen but she could still smell him for sure. She had been following the trail being led by Tugger's aroma and as she had gone the thought that Tugger could use a wash crossed her mind more than once. Had he not been taking care of himself? That was a stupid question really, everyone could see he'd pretty much given up on his looks. Bomba had to chuckle to herself: if someone had told her a few months ago that Tugger would give up on preening himself and being forever vain she would have told them to get their head checked. Still, she felt a little bad for him. It was clear that being reunited with Misto was the only way he could get back to being himself and everyone knew it. That was what she hoped to talk to him about. She knew she couldn't make it happen but she hoped she could help him keep hope which she had noticed seemed to be slipping lately. Despite thinking he was an arse she still felt bad when seeing Tugger so down and she really had no quam with Misto – at least not anymore. They had been through so much and since she knew she was the centre most of their problems it seemed only right that she try and help them get back on track.

At that moment though that all depended on whether she could find Tugger. Taking another good sniff of the air she directed herself to where the trail seemed to be leading and started lumbering that way. Huffing and puffing to get over yet another ridge she let out a few off-colour phrases before she popped her head over the top and looked around. Fortunately for her Tugger was standing right on the other side and he turned when he heard her clattering.

"What are you doing, Bomba?" he asked grimly as he watched her struggle

"Lend a queen a paw?" she puffed

Tugger sighed and went over to help her. A few moments filled with tough struggling later Bomba was over the mound and crouching with her paws on her knees as she slowly caught her breath. It wasn't the most graceful of sights and if Tugger hadn't been so gloomy then he surely would have sniggered at her expense.

"What do you want?" he asked apathetically while looking away

"You always start conversations that way; do you ever wonder why some cats think you're a twat?"

"Only you think that"

"Trust me, there are others"

Tugger looked back at her with a look as if to say 'I'm not in the mood', "So what do you want?"

"Just to talk, you seem sad"

Tugger scoffed sarcastically, "Nothing gets past you, does it?"

"Well, sometimes it helps to talk"

"I did my talking with Misto and look where that left me"

"Would you have preferred not to have told him?"

"Of course I would have preferred not to tell him but I couldn't lie forever…despite you saying I should"

"I never told you to lie, just not to tell him"

"I think he would have noticed that eventually," said Tugger pointing towards her bump. Bomba just placed her paws on it and gave him softer eyes,

"Never mind about this, all that matters now is you two figuring out how to carry on"

Tugger was quiet for a moment, "I don't know what's gonna happen. I spoke to him just now and I get the feeling he thinks we might be beyond repair"

"Oh surely he doesn't mean that"

"Well, that's the thing: I don't know. I need to talk to him but he's not in a fit enough state to do that yet. Right now I'm just glad to have him back and I'm really hoping he'll forgive me"

"Oh, so he hasn't done that yet?"

"No, but then again I'm not sure if I ever expect he will. Maybe all I can hope for is that he'll learn to live with it and try to get by"

As soon as Tugger said it he sighed frustratedly and turned away. He stalked forward a few paces before he sat himself down on an upturned paint can and buried his face in his paws. He looked so torn up and Bomba wished she had some magic way of making it all better. Feeling slightly useless she waited a few moments and then went over to him to place a paw on his shoulder.

"I just want him back, Bomba, you know that. I need him with me"

"I know, babe, this is a horrible mess that never should have happened"

"I just don't know what to do"

Bomba tried to lower herself to his level quietly but the added weight made it far less elegant than she had hoped for. When she was eye to eye with him she softly gripped his shoulder making him look up at her. She could see he had desperation in his eyes and she tried to console him with her expression and soft voice.

"Look, Tug, I can see how tough this is but you mustn't give up. So what if you can't think of what to do? You do anything at all and either hope that it's right or that the right thing will come along eventually. Whatever the case you mustn't stop trying to get him back unless you want him to think you don't care enough to keep trying. You've just got to keep going"

"What? And hope that I wear him down?" Tugger said with a sting in his voice

"No, just keep going until he sees you'll never stop loving him and that you'll do anything for as long as it takes to get him back"

Tugger placed his paws back down on his knees and looked straight ahead with a blank face. She was right: he had actually decided to give up searching for Misto barely a few hours ago. If it hadn't been for him coming back then he probably never would have found him and he'd be lost. He had to carry on now, he'd been granted a lifeline which was more than he could have hoped for; he couldn't just give that up. It was true that he loved Misto more than anything and it only seemed right that he should fight for him and accept no other outcome than victory. He needed him back so there was no other option than to keep trying. Somehow, someway he'd do this no matter how long it took.

"Bomba…I…"

"Yeah?" the red queen said with a kind smile

"Wow…how did you…how do you know…you could have easily told me just to give up, why are you helping me?"

"'Cos you need him, Tug, you've never needed anyone more than him and I guess you and I…well, we're sort of like friends…and we are having a kitten so I guess I need to keep you around."

"I…well…thanks" was all Tugger could say.

"It's alright, besides I'm bored of seeing you look like such an unhappy mess in every way imaginable. You really look disgusting. Really!"

Tugger looked up at her with disdain, "I knew it wouldn't be long before you ruined the moment. There you are being all kind and then you go and destroy it"

"Oh shut up, you tart! Get your arse back there, clean up and find a way to get him back"

"Fine" said Tugger getting up and stalking away. A few seconds later he stopped and looked back at Bomba. He looked at her for a few moments before he let out a frustrated groan and held out his paw. Being made to feel like a bit of an inconvenience to him Bomba reluctantly went over and took his paw and sarcastically muttered,

"Such a gentletom"

"What? You're getting really fat now and you need all the help you can get"

"Oh yeah, that's really nice, Tug. I can't believe you kiss Misto with that mouth…"

The two bickered until they got back to the clearing but neither one really meant anything mean that they said. They were glad they'd managed to achieve something in their own ways and what seemed like a total wreck before looked a tiny bit less messy now. Tugger felt that hope resurface in him again and this time it felt like it was there to stay regardless of how small it was.

Once they were in the clearing again they stopped and looked at each other with neither really knowing what to do. It seemed like a moment where they ought to show their appreciation for each other even if it was false. It was a tense moment and neither one really wanted to start things off. Eventually Tugger muttered something and raised his arms out to her suggesting a hug. Bomba awkwardly reflected his actions and as if they were forcing themselves they started to move towards each other. Across from them a smattering of Jellicles watched as they attempted to show some sort of appreciation and they all sat quietly while they waited to see what happened.

"What are they doing?" asked Demeter to Munk

"I don't know. Are they fighting?"

"I don't think so, they'd probably be drawing blood already if they were"

"Are they…trying to hug?"

"Everlasting! I think you might be right"

"It doesn't seem too likely"

"Well what else could they be doing?"

"I don't know"

Both feeling like idiots Tugger and Bomba eventually just dropped their arms and sneered at each other. Neither one wanted to hug so they mutually just walked away from each other feeling like they had both just dodged a bullet. Tugger went off to his den with a look of intrigue on his face. Despite feeling somewhat repulsed by Bomba she had nonetheless given him a lot to think about and he was glad that she had put it so clearly for him. He'd been missing a lot of clarity during the last couple of months and he was glad to become reacquainted with it once more.

Bomba stalked off in the other direction not feeling quite as successful in making ground. She wished she could have told Tugger the exact thing he needed to do to fix his problems with Misto but it was impossible to know for sure what that was. Sighing she stopped and turned around and saw Tugger disappear into his den. She did feel bad for him even now and she really didn't like the feeling that she was at fault. What else could she do though? She had spoken to him and given him what seemed like a little hope so was that enough? What else was there? As she looked around while she wondered she stopped when her eyes crossed Jenny and Skimble's den. She realised Misto was still in there and suddenly an idea crossed her mind. _'Maybe I should go and see him as well' _she thought and then started to puzzle. If she did go and see him would she just be meddling and making things worse? What if she said something wrong that upset Misto even more? Would everyone think she was trying to push he and Tugger further apart? Then again, how much worse could it get? Surely if she said something bad then the tux wouldn't take it seriously and if she said something good then maybe things would start to work out.

Rolling her eyes, she started towards the den with both good and bad feelings over what she intended to do. Hopefully she could offer some kind of help to Misto like she had done with Tugger.

* * *

Inside the den Misto lay on the bed he had been placed on breathing fairly heavily. It wasn't from being so ill though, it was from having chowed down on more food than he had ever before eaten in one go. It didn't seem natural that the amount of food he had eaten could fit inside him but still Jenny had insisted that he keep going. He didn't know whether he felt better or worse he was so stuffed and it had made Jenny chuckle to see him let his head fall back and rub his tummy in contentment. She knew he still had a long way to go but at least he was on the mend – or so it seemed. Hopefully after a few days he would be ought of her den and back to normal. Well, as normal as could be achieved.

Jenny was now across the den and cleaning the dish Misto had eaten from. It felt nice to be looking after someone other than kittens for a change although she knew they would come yowling sooner or later for something or other. At least with Misto she was being thanked properly and spoken to like and adult.

Just as she finished up she heard a gentle rustling from behind her and turned around to see Bomba timidly entering her den.

"Bombalurina, how nice to see you" said Jenny warmly, "Are you feeling alright dear?"

"Yes, Jenny, fine"

"That kitten not giving you any grief?"

"It's getting a little heavy but I'm managing for now"

"Any aches or pains at all?"

"No"

"Are you feeling tender or having any trouble holding your bladder?"

"Jenny!"

"I have to ask these things, dear, they're very common problems for queens when they become pregnant. Besides I rather think it's up to me to make sure you and that kit are healthy"

"Well, yes, but I…well, you know"

"Don't be afraid to talk about these things, they've happened to a lot of us"

"I was hoping I could talk to Misto if that's okay" said Bomba changing the subject rather abruptly.

"Oh, I see," said the tabby queen forgetting about her patient across the den. Looking across she noticed Misto suddenly looking rather nervous and he was staring over in their direction like a deer caught in headlights. What on earth had gotten into him? "He's, uh, right over here" said Jenny leading Bomba over that way.

As Bomba turned she noticed the same things Jenny had done and she instantly felt both confused and guilty at the same time. She didn't want Misto to feel threatened or scared, she just wanted to speak with him.

Misto at first hadn't noticed whom it was when Bomba had come in since he was too preoccupied with feeling stuffed. As he listened though he recognized it to be her and he had suddenly felt quite afraid. This was the queen that was carrying Tugger's kitten which was conceived behind his back. She was the epitome of why he and Tugger were split and he didn't know whether to be angry with her or terrified. In the end it turned out to be the latter and feeling as if there was nowhere to run he felt his jaw start to quiver as he saw her coming towards him. What was she going to do? Was she here to scare him off so she could swoop in and have Tugger for herself? It seemed probable since she was having his kitten and probably wanted him to complete their little family. Or was she here to dig at him? She had managed to snatch Tugger away and it certainly wouldn't have been the first time she had been so mean in that respect. Then again, she had seemed so supportive before, how could she be coming now to be mean? Not having a clue what to do Misto just lay there with eyes wide as the red queen came over and sat down. He waited silently for the first blow and had to force himself not to shiver in fear.

Bomba felt really uneasy and once again she didn't know where to begin. She knew she had to be gentle but that wasn't really her way, was it? Still, she gave it her best shot,

"How are you feeling, Misto?"

The tux tried to respond. He tried to find the right words or any words at all for that matter but he just couldn't make a connection between his brain and his mouth. He was too scared – a feeling he thought he might be able to avoid now that he was home – and he just wanted her to go away. She didn't though, she pressed on,

"Still hurting? You look a lot better today"

Silence.

"Can you talk?"

Still silence.

Bomba looked around at Jenny confusedly and in return she just received a gentle shrug. The red queen turned back and felt even more at a loss for words. In the end she decided to go ahead with what she had wanted to do in the first place, hopefully she could do this one-sidedly.

"Look, Misto, I know you probably hate me. I would hate me if it was I in your place and I'm so sorry for everything that happened. You have to believe it was an accident, we had no idea what we were doing and we'd do anything to take it back. Please just believe me when I say I'm sorry. I never wanted to hurt you, not again. I know I did it before and afterwards I felt so terrible for doing it, to have done it again makes me feel worse than I could have ever imagined and I'm just so, so sorry. You don't have to forgive me and I don't expect you to but you need to know I'd give anything to take it back. You and Tugger are so perfect together and I don't think I've ever seen any couple so happy"

Silence bathed the den again while the message sunk in for Misto. It was a big message but not entirely unexpected. Before, he thought he knew that Bomba never would have tried to hurt him again but that had gotten lost somewhere along the way. Yet here she was now telling him that. He had heard so many things and thought so many other things during the past two months that he found it difficult to be told one of those things another time. It was so confusing and he tried to say at least something but once again nothing came out. Bomba was left waiting and she found it so difficult to find the right words to carry on. She still had something to say though so she forced herself to continue.

"I really hope you'll be bale to patch things up with him. I know it can't be easy since you must be so…upset about it all but you must believe he never would have done it. You two belong together and no matter what happens you really need to be together"

'_I know that'_ thought Misto, _'but I'm just not sure'_

"I know it might be hard to see sometimes but you're the best thing that ever happened to Tugger and without you he'll be lost. I know it's not all about him but he really needs you Misto, more than anything. I really hope you can see how much he loves you and I'm sure you still love him too. Love never goes away, not really so you must still feel for him regardless of…this" she said as she patted her swollen belly. She felt maybe she was getting through to him when his eyes seemed to flicker a little. "There's nothing you can't do Misto, you're the Magical Mister Mistoffelees and I'm sure that even though this is horrible you can get through. You were never meant to end up like this and you deserve to have everything. I hope you can take back Tugger, the things he says show just how much he loves you and needs you in his life as well as how terrible he feels for what happened. I know I have no right to ask or dictate anything but…please forgive him and take him back. You don't have to forgive me but please do it for him. He's a complete idiot and he's always done the most stupid things, you know that, but please realise he never meant to hurt you. He really loves you Misto, he really does"

Misto continued to stare at her although he now looked a lot more cut up. She seemed to be telling the truth but he had been made to believe so much and then have it torn away again that he just didn't know what to do. He knew he loved Tugger - Bomba was right about that – but now she was asking him to forgive everything. Even though he may have wanted to he just didn't know how and he wished someone could just tell him. He kind of wished Bomba could have told him how but he couldn't speak to her. He really didn't know how he felt about her anymore and it just made him feel terrible again.

"I think maybe Misto should try and sleep now," said Jenny from across the den. To listen to what Bomba had said sounded like it must have been torture to Misto and she could see he needed respite. Taking the cue Bomba nodded and got up. Just before she turned to leave she said one last thing,

"Concentrate on getting better, then you can work on you and Tugger. I'm sure it won't be long before you're back to normal"

What did she mean? He being better or he and Tugger? Did she mean both? What was he meant to believe? Turning his head away Misto closed his eyes and waited for the moment Jenny told him she was gone. There was so much tension it seemed to take a million years before he was given the relief he needed. When he was given the all clear he unscrunched his face and let the emotion wash over him once more. Trying not to let Jenny notice he let a few tears slip before he managed to compose himself again and pretend he was okay.

"Are you alright, dear?" asked the tabby queen as she came back over to him

"I think so," replied Misto quietly

"She probably shouldn't have said that, it's not her place"

"It doesn't matter, she's right. I still love Tugger but I don't know how to get past all of the hurt. I want to but I just can't forget."

Jenny sat down on the side of the bed and rubbed Misto's ears softly, "Of course you can't, it's too horrible to forget. I'm not saying I know how you feel but I bet it can't be good"

"It's not"

"Still, maybe you can talk to Tugger a little when you get better"

Misto sighed, "It's not just that though"

"What else, dear?"

"Look at me, I'm a wreck. I used to feel so good in my own fur and now I'm such a mess I just feel lousy. That's not the worst thing though; the worst thing is my magic has gone. It's disappeared Jenny and I'm really scared it won't come back"

"Gone? What do you mean gone?"

"When I ran away it just seemed to go. I don't know why but it's not there anymore and I'm really frightened it's lost forever," said Misto getting a little more frantic.

"Shh, don't work yourself up, dear. Maybe it's just because you were getting ill and it packed up temporarily. Try it now, maybe it's come back now that you've had a good rest"

Misto apprehensively looked down at his paws. The distinctive tingle he felt whenever he thought about using his magic was definitely not there and he felt like he knew it wasn't going to work. Still, he rubbed them together and flexed them out in front before he gave it a shot. Forming his thumbs and middle fingers into rings on each paw he pressed tightly and clicked them at the same time. Nothing happened. He was left laying on the bed with his paws stretched out in front of him not having made anything happen at all. Biting his lip he tried again but still nothing came out. Sadly he looked up at Jenny and gave her a look as if to say 'You see?'

Jenny put her paw on his shoulder and rubbed gently to try and comfort him.

"It's alright, dear, give it time. You haven't been resting for that long so maybe it just needs a little longer to recover"

"But what if it doesn't, Jenny? What if I've lost it?"

"I'm sure you haven't"

"But what if I have? I'll have nothing then, magic is what makes me special and without I'll just be plain and boring. No one will think I'm special anymore"

Jenny looked at him sympathetically as he worried, "Come on, dear, you'll always be special no matter what. I promise you that"

"But I'll have nothing"

"You certainly won't have nothing. You'll still have all of us, and a home, and family nearby…and a loving mate." She said that last bit with a little raise in her voice hoping she might get the tom to talk about it. Misto just let his head roll back and closed his eyes. He was too tired to think about Tugger now and he needed some more sleep if he was going to tackle that problem.

"I can't think about that now, Jenny"

"Alright, dear, but you know you can't just leave it don't you? Whatever the outcome you need some closure or else you'll just be left like this"

"He did something that destroyed me, I can't just put the pieces back together like that. But then again I don't know if I can put the pieces back together at all without him"

"You still love him, don't you?"

Misto was quiet for a moment before he responded, "…Of course I do"

"Maybe that's got something to do with your magic being on the fritz"

"What?" asked Misto curiously.

"Well, I don't know, but if your magic was somehow linked to you being completely happy inside and feeling love properly then maybe that's the reason it's gone. I don't really understand magic because it's so…mystical…but then again so is love. It wouldn't surprise me if they go paw in paw"

"…Hmm" hummed Misto quietly, there certainly seemed to be some logic there. He was feeling too drained to carry on though, he needed to go to sleep again and he asked Jenny if she could pull something over the door to keep the light out. She happily complied and left him alone to try and rest some more. Misto was left lying there in the darkness with only his thoughts. Could it really be as simple as his magic being linked to the love he felt in his heart? If so then how did his magic work before he fell in love with Tugger? Maybe it wasn't specifically loving someone but the absence of love that made his magic fizzle out. Maybe feeling so distant from Tugger was the reason his magic had gone away. Did that mean it wouldn't come back unless he took Tugger back? Perhaps. His heart was broken now and the only way he could think of repairing it was to take back Tugger. How was he meant to do that? It just seemed impossible! Not only that but it didn't seem fair. Tugger was the one that had done wrong and now Misto was meant to just forget about it and take him back like nothing had ever happened? How was that at all just? It should be Tugger trying to fix them, not Misto; it wasn't his place!

Lying there Misto felt himself become angry as he really felt he had been cheated. By some kind of divine intervention he had had his heart broken and now it seemed it was he that had to put it back together. It was not fair! Not at all! He felt so angry and he balled his fists against his face as he felt the rage boil within him. Pretty soon though it started to become sadness once more and he felt the need to cry replace his heated anger. This didn't seem fair either; why was it that every time he tried to vent some frustration over Tugger it led to crying? He should have been allowed to avoid being so hung up on his cheating mate but it just didn't work out that way. He couldn't deny he still loved Tugger so much and that was what was hurting. He needed Tugger and he felt like the hurt was the only barrier keeping them apart. He was frustrated because the hurt was a barrier in his own mind and it was not one he felt he could break down so easily. All he wanted was Tugger to hold him and tell him it would all be okay but it was he that was stopping himself from having that.

Poor Misto felt so conflicted as he lay there and he was only too glad when sleep finally took him. He hated this, he just wanted it all to be over but so far there was no sign of that happening. Soundly he slept for the rest of the day and was afforded the luxury of loving dreams about Tugger opposed to the crushingly painful nightmares that had haunted him during his rough sleeping and catnip crashes.

* * *

Hours passed and Tugger hadn't emerged from his den for the rest of the day. He had been so busy trying to think of what he could do that would be such a massive gesture as to show Misto he really adored him and that he was really sorry. Well, at least the former. He didn't really know what else he could do to show Misto he was sorry but he wasn't opposed to any ideas that wanted to pop up. Right now Tugger was concentrating on showing Misto that there was no one else for him in the world and he had been so lost in thought that he hadn't realised night had started to fall. He was getting hungry and he wondered whether Misto would be eating too right now. He thought about going to see him but then decided unless he could bring something with him then it wasn't the right time. As he thought about that he realised he was really pressed for time to think of something and he started to worry about not being able to come up with anything at all. What if it took a really long time, would Misto think he had given up? That would be the worst thing ever; he'd never take him back then.

Tugger pushed himself up and started to pace in the gloom of his den. He had been working his brain much harder than he was used to and as a result he was getting restless and tired – a strange combination but apparently feasible. After a few minutes of going back and forth he was left feeling no more advanced than he had done before he started and fell back down on the bed. As he lay there he started to feel his eyes get heavy and knew he couldn't fight of the sleepiness that was coming over him. Before he went out he made a resolution that the next day he would come up with something and he wouldn't go to bed the next night unless he did. This was for Misto and right now there was nothing more important than him.

With a fairly confident smile Tugger allowed himself to drift away. At least he was starting to act like the old Tugger again what with his cockiness resurfacing slightly.

* * *

A long time later Misto awoke in silent darkness and looked around in the blackened den. In another part he could hear the breathing of Skimble and Jenny as they slept in their own bed and what may have been similar sounds radiating from some kittens – which ones Misto couldn't tell.

As he let his eyes adjust to the darkness he realised it was dark enough to be very late at night by now and that he must have been sleeping for the rest of the day. It seemed so late in fact that everyone had gone to bed and he realised that must mean it wouldn't be long before the sun was to come up. Misto remembered how he used to like this time. He often used to wake up early and still be in darkness with maybe a hint of light on the horizon. He used to enjoy it because it seemed very eerie but also as if there was a little magic in the air and he liked being able to listen to the silence and watch a new day begin very, very slowly. The main reason he used to like being though was because he always found himself in Tugger's arms as he carried on sleeping next to him. He used to love laying there listening to his big, strong mate breathe softly and he loved being able to watch him sleep so soundly. Being able to see Tugger in such a peaceful, non-showy and even vulnerable state was truly a treat for the tux and he loved every second of it.

Right now Misto was alone and since he had awoken in a less familiar place and without his mate to hold him he suddenly felt very lonely and cold. Tugger was so big and his mane was certainly proportionate to his size and as a result he always managed to keep Misto perfectly warm; that was what made him feel safe. The tux revelled in the feeling of security he felt whenever Tugger held him and he missed it so dearly as he lay in Jenny and Skimble's den alone. He knew it was silly and kittenish but even started to feel afraid, but who could blame him having gone through what he had in the past weeks? Misto had experienced something he really wished he could have avoided and now he was left feeling incredibly alone. He could really use that warm, safe feeling from Tugger right about now but he knew he couldn't have it. Nothing had miraculously changed overnight like he might have wished it had done and Misto still felt the awful pain in his heart that he had done before he went to sleep. It really was such an annoyance now and Misto just wanted it gone. He really felt more abject towards it opposed to under its control and you might even say he was getting bored of feeling like that. Still, it kept its grip on him and he hated having to yield to its dictation.

So there he was feeling both afraid and conflicted. It was just like he had felt when he was sleeping on the street in the middle of London and back then he had never felt more scared. How he used to wish Tugger could have swooped in a saved him and he was glad that at least now he could just get up and go over to Tugger for that safe feeling he needed if he wanted to.

'_Wait, what?'_ thought Misto as he bolted upright. Had he just decided that he could simply get up and go to snuggle with Tugger as easy as that? It seemed like he had and the tux narrowed his eyebrows at the idea. Surely that was stupid; how could he simply get out of bed and trot over to his den like nothing had happened? Sure, it was all he wanted to do but could he really do it? Everything was so messed up so how could he justify forgetting what Tugger had done and just go over there? He couldn't. He absolutely couldn't and that was that.

He really wanted to though. As he sat there he looked around once more and he realised just how afraid of being alone he really was. He hated admitting it but he really did not like being alone right now. He needed someone to be there for him and if he was going to heal not just on the outside but on the inside as well then he needed some comfort, real comfort. Sure, he could get a little if he went to see Victoria or Jemima or maybe even Munk or Demeter but none of them compared to the completely fulfilling, warming, spectacular comfort and love that he felt when he was with Tugger. That was what he needed and right now it seemed to scream at him more than the need to stay away.

Before he knew what he was doing Misto swung his legs over the side of the bed and looked down at his paws. Very gently he put them on the floor and started to push himself up. As he did so he felt a few stabs of pain shoot through his body and he flinched as they shook him. They weren't quite as bad as before though and he was determined to get up. Although he found it difficult to balance properly he eventually managed to stand on his shaky legs and straighten up. His head told him to sit back down but he couldn't silence his heart which commanded him to go on. Very slowly he raised his right paw and placed in front of the other, then did the same with the left and then the right again. It was rocky but he was walking and in no time at all he had made his way across the den and was staring out into the clearing. Now that he was moving he started to feel a little groggy and he knew he wasn't really well enough to be up. Still, he needed to see Tugger. If he could at least see him then maybe he would feel alright. If not then maybe he could just touch him and that would be enough. Surely that would do it, right?

Using his arms to pull himself out Misto exited the den and started to climb down from the junk. He was then on the floor of the clearing which was eerily silent as he started to make his way across to his den. Every step seemed like a mile for Misto as he fixated on the dark doorway ahead of him and let his heart carry him forward. He knew this was crazy but he was beyond caring at that point. He needed his mate and that was all that he cared about.

When he got to the junk leading up to his doorway he made sure to be very quiet so as not to wake Tugger. True, the tom was the heaviest sleeper Misto knew but he wasn't about to risk waking him. Very carefully Misto pulled himself upwards and struggled with the last little bit before he found his footing. When he had made sure he was balanced he delicately looked through the doorway and listened. Inside he could hear the very distinctive sound of Tugger breathing in his sleep and straight away Misto started to feel comforted. He stood there for a few minutes just listening to the Maine coon and a smile soon crossed his lips. Despite feeling cut up inside Misto loved being able to imagine that everything was alright and he gently rested his head against the side of the doorframe in contentment.

Unfortunately for Misto he didn't realise that where he rested his head hung an empty tin can that only took the slightest nudge to be set loose. Misto's eyes flew open wide as he heard the can clatter down to his paws and then continue rolling into the den making a fair racket along its way. His eyes followed it into the darkness and as it went he felt his heart start to pound in his chest and the fur prickle up on his back. Once the can had stopped there were a few seconds of silence where Misto thought maybe it hadn't woken Tugger. When he heard a soft fumbling in the background he slowly brought his eyes up to the bed where he knew his mate had been sleeping.

"Who is it?" he heard Tugger ask groggily as his shadow moved into a sitting position. Misto was frozen and he just stared straight ahead in shock. A few seconds later Tugger threw his legs over the side of the bed and pushed himself up to see who was intruding. He took a big stride forward and when he rubbed his eyes he looked up to see a shadow across the doorway. That shadow, he knew it. It was a very distinctive shadow that he had come to know as belonging to someone very special to him.

"Misto?" he asked unbelievingly as he gazed at his mate, "Is that you?"

The small tux just looked at Tugger and didn't know what to do. He was petrified but now that he could see Tugger he suddenly felt very different. The way the very dim light from the doorway hit him was perfect and he truly looked magnificent as he stood there in confusion. After a few moments of awe Misto threw himself back into the room and stammered as he spoke,

"I…I'm sorry, I didn't mean to wake you…I just wanted to…I needed to see you…I mean…I was so alone and…I…"

Tugger stood there dumbfounded. Earlier on Misto had seemed so distant yet now here he was spying on him as he slept. What was going on?

"You needed to see me?"

"I…uh…yes but it's just…I don't know…"

"You said you felt alone?"

Mist was silent then. Why did he have to open his big mouth? Any second now Tugger would guess that he had been missing him and he needed to come back. He didn't want him to know that, he was still so hurt. Taking a few deep breaths Misto tried to carry on,

"Yeah…but I don't mean…"

Tugger took another step forward and Misto nearly swooned over the sight he was treated with. Tugger looked so spectacular and the need to be close to him was overwhelming. Before Misto could stop himself he took a step forward and lifted his paws slightly. He stood there for a few moments before he spoke again,

"I do miss you. I'm not happy about it but I…do need you. I hate feeling this way but…I do."

Tugger didn't know what to say. To hear Misto say that he needed him was such a wondrous thing and it made his heart sing to know that not all was lost.

"Oh, Misto…you don't know how much I've missed you-"

"Just be quiet," commanded Misto as he cut Tugger off, "Don't speak, don't say anything, I just need…something"

Tugger complied and gazed at Misto wondering what was cooking behind those beautiful, blue eyes. Misto was locked in a mental tug of war trying to figure out where to go from there. On the one paw he knew he needed to leave but on other he so desperately wanted to stay. Besides, he knew he wanted Tugger back and maybe throwing himself in at the deep end was what he needed. At first that seemed preposterous but as the seconds ticked by he started to think that maybe the idea was good. Common sense should have told him it wasn't but that had gone out the window the moment he had gotten out of bed.

How to make the first step though, what was he to do? He knew Tugger wouldn't respond just to words and he knew he had to try harder if he wanted him to know that he still cared. Reaching out Misto stepped forward and placed his paws on Tugger's chest and ran them gently over the soft but fiery mane that protruded. Beneath he could feel the outline of Tugger's muscles and it gave Misto butterflies as the sense of security grew stronger. Tugger just stood there not knowing what to do but loving the touch of Misto once more. It was ecstasy and he had been longing for it for a long time. Misto's mind felt airy as he got closer still and in a moment he was nearly flat against Tugger. He knew he should stop, his head begged him to stop but he just wasn't listening anymore. He was lost in the moment and he just couldn't prevent himself from doing what he did next.

In a flash of madness Misto ran his paws up to Tugger's shoulders, pulled himself upwards and pressed their lips together. In an instant he was wrapped up in a wonderful feeling of bliss that included all of the feelings he had been yearning for and more multiplied by a thousand. Misto nearly came to tears as the spectacular feeling washed over him and he hungrily kissed Tugger more as he basked in the glow.

Tugger was stunned. He had no idea what was going on but he too felt the bliss that was their first kiss since Misto ran away. It was the best feeling in the world and as it went on Tugger started to feel control over his body return to him. He had no idea how disastrous it was going to be when he raised his paw up and went to scoop it around his mate. No sooner had he touched him Misto suddenly realised what he was doing and threw himself back against the wall of the den. Tugger flinched as he felt them part and straight away he wondered what he had done wrong.

"What? What is it? What happened?"

Misto stared at him like he had just been told the worst news of his life and he panted heavily as he tried to regain some clear thought.

"Misto…" breathed Tugger, "…I'm sorry…"

That was too much for Misto. He knew it wasn't Tugger's fault but he could see the tom was already blaming himself. In his mind the tux had just made everything a million times worse and at that moment it seemed as if he'd ruined everything for good.

"I'm sorry, Tugger…" said Misto as tears started to run from his eyes. In a flash he bolted from the den leaving Tugger alone. The bigger tom stood there in amazement and just looked at the empty doorway in a stupor. A few moments later he went back to the bed and sat down hard. He put his face in his paws and sighed heavily as he felt things turning back around from the right direction. Had everything just been set back even further? He hoped not but how could he tell?

Misto ran out into the clearing feeling his body scream at him to take it easy. He placed his paws against his body as the pain racked him and he looked around frantically for somewhere to go. In a split second decision he threw himself in the direction of his old den and ducked down to enter the dark pipe. Once inside he fell down on his front and cried hard. He'd ruined everything! What was he meant to do now? Surely any chance he might have had to fix things was gone now that he'd gone and kissed Tugger and made him feel even worse! He'd lose him for sure now!

Misto remained in his pipe sobbing for a long time feeling he'd lost Tugger and he truly hated himself for not being able to exercise self-control. He needed his Tugger, but that seemed like it was all over now.

**Oh no! Poor Misto! He just doesn't know what to do or how to feel! He only wants to be loved, if only he could find a way!**

**Well done for getting through that one, I know it was long but I'm glad I got a lot done. I hope you enjoyed it and please review you darlings!**

**Next chapter soon! x**


	14. Falling Off The Wagon

'**Sup? So anyway, I'm glad y'all liked the last chapter. When I was reading through I was like 'Geez, this is way too long' but then I was like 'Yay, they got through it.' You're reviews are always so nice and they've given me a lot to think about which is just perfect!**

**Hey, I just looked at my traffic tab in my account and there are a couple of hits from 'Anonymous Proxy'. Where could they be from? North Korea or something? Lol, it made me curious.**

**Love Is No Fairytale**

**Chapter 14**

**Falling Off The Wagon**

Something felt very strange and he couldn't quite decide exactly what it was. It felt like he ached but not in the way that he had done when he'd gotten back, this was different and new and not entirely welcome. It was like he had slept badly and every tiny movement was waking him up to the aches he was going to be experiencing that day.

Misto sighed as he started to realise where he was and allowed his eyes to open slowly as light shone in from behind him. This place had a familiar scent: his own. This old pipe had been his home for a long time before he had moved in with Tugger and now as he flicked his eyes around he felt it to be much smaller than he remembered. Surely he couldn't have grown, he was an adult now and had stopped growing despite having ended up rather small. Then again, he was a Jellicle and Jellicles were supposed to be rather small, weren't they? It was weird that the pipe seemed smaller despite that and the reason why he couldn't quite put his finger on just yet.

After a few minutes of blissful ignorance Misto started to get flashes of what had happened the previous night and groaned as he felt the massive waves of shame and embarrassment wash over him. He hadn't meant to kiss Tugger, he hadn't even wanted to go there in the first place. Why couldn't he have just kept himself from getting up and have had a little self-control so there might still be something he could work with? He really did still love Tugger but he couldn't just go back to him and as such he couldn't just go and get the things he needed from him willy-nilly. If he was going to try and find a way to take Tugger back then he knew he couldn't go to him, lose control and kiss him whenever he felt like it. That was not the way this was meant to happen. So how then was it meant to happen? Misto didn't know. He felt so inexperienced in matters like this but then again is anyone ever experienced in and prepared for cheating? The very word still jabbed at Misto and it sounded so very dirty to him. It still made him feel like Tugger's reject and it sickened him to think that the maned tom couldn't have controlled himself or loved him enough at that time to stop himself from doing it. It made Misto feel inadequate and unclean and he just wanted those feelings to go away. Sure, Tugger had said sorry but it was clear that it was going to take more than words. Misto knew he had been scarred in some way and this pain wasn't going to go away.

'_Just another one for the collection' _thought Misto as he thought about the scars he'd received from his last ordeal concerning Tugger. Why had this one tom left him with so many marks? Is that what was meant to happen when one falls in love? Is one meant to bear the marks of turmoil in a relationship? In strange ways they didn't seem like they were at all worthwhile as well as being marks of honour at the same time. Misto was confused; confused and upset. His body ached, he was hungry again and he was laying on his front in a position that the curves of the pipe were making incredibly uncomfortable. Above it all though there was something he needed. Like a fly buzzing around his head Misto yearned for a little taste of catnip and he suddenly felt quite worthless that the nag was back. He'd really hoped he might have been rid of it when he threw that pouch away but it had followed him home it seemed and like an unwanted guest was sticking around and making demands.

Doing his best to distract himself he turned himself over slowly in the pipe – groaning and wincing as he went – and lay on his back. Once he was settled he closed his eyes again and did his best to think of something else. Jenny would probably be wondering where he was right now and her first stop would probably be Tugger. She'd no doubt give him a tough time whatever he told her but Misto didn't feel particularly bad about getting him in trouble with the tabby queen. He figured that wouldn't be the worst of his problems since he too was probably confused by what Misto had done. It was then that Misto started to go through what had happened the previous night and as he did he became more frustrated. He remembered going to the den and listening for a while and he remembered the can that had fallen down and woken Tugger. He remembered the panic that had gripped him for a few moments and then the adrenaline start to shoot around his body when he heard Tugger moving. What had happened then though? All he remembered was seeing Tugger and feeling…like he was floating. It had been so strange to say the least; Tugger had looked really good and Misto certainly remembered losing control and kissing him. That had felt really good for a few seconds before reality set in. The last thing he remembered clearly was Tugger's paw landing softly on his back and that was when he had freaked out. What happened afterwards was kind of a blur and Misto supposed that in his panic he'd ended up right there in the pipe.

For a moment Misto felt sorry for Tugger, he hadn't mean to lead him on and he could bet that he was confused by all of this. His mate was probably in his den right now staring up the ceiling just like him and wondering what on earth had happened. Misto wished it hadn't occurred, he really wished that but there was no going back. What did it all mean? Was he that desperate for Tugger that he couldn't stop himself from acting out? Or was he still a little goofy from being ill and '_catnip would really help right now, wouldn't it Misto?'_

The tux's eyes flew open as soon as that floated through his mind. After a few seconds of shocked staring Misto sighed and rolled his eyes in self-pity. He really wanted a taste of catnip and it was getting hard to ignore. _'Why did I ever think that would be a good idea?' _thought Misto as he lay there trying to forget. It was then that he thought about what would happen if Jenny found out. She'd have an absolute fit and Misto knew his paws wouldn't touch the ground! Biting his lip he tried to tell himself that bearing Jenny's wrath was not worth a quick high but it wasn't so easy. The yearning was becoming greater as the moments ticked on and he knew those cravings were going to become uncontrollable soon.

He continued to lie there as the morning progressed trying to will himself out of the need for a catnip binge. As time went by he started to get the shakes and a headache and he knew there was only one thing that would get rid of them. If only he could stay strong – but how successful had he really been in doing that lately?

* * *

Jenny was on the warpath. She was in no way pleased that her patient had disappeared in the night and she was determined to get him back one way or another. As she stormed out of her den the whole junkyard fell silent and stared straight at her. With a steely gaze she seemed to drive the message 'Who did it?' entirely home. None of them knew what on earth she meant but they could see something was wrong. They were, however, clever enough not to get in her way when she was in one of these moods and as such every single one of them kept silent and still as she scanned the clearing.

After a moment or two she started to climb down from the junk and heatedly paced forward out into the open. She stood there for a few seconds before she swept across a gathering of Jellicles at the right of the clearing making a few of them flinch nervously as she seemed to penetrate right into they're souls. It was lucky that no one had stolen Misto from her den or else they surely would never see the light of day again; if they had known that then they certainly would feel relieved.

When the silence became almost too much to bear the tabby queen inevitably started squawking loudly,

"Have any of you seen Misto today?" she asked bluntly

A few Jellicles – namely Etcetera and Electra – looked at each other confusedly before looking back at her. Out of the group it was Admetus who spoke timidly hoping she wouldn't snap at him,

"Is he not in with you?"

It was a stupid question really and Jenny only seemed to become more heated,

"Do you think I would be asking if he were? One of you must know where he's gone so let's hear it!"

Silence was all she received in return.

"I shan't ask twice" she said sternly

Even if one of them did know they were surely too terrified of her to speak up now, after all she might clip them so hard that their ears came off. A few moments later Jenny still found herself with no answer and flusteredly turned away to start her search properly. While she may have looked angry she was nonetheless worried inside; what if he'd run off again?

"Skimble!" she shouted back towards her den receiving a clattering in return before the ginger tabby appeared quickly.

"Coming, dear!" He was all too wise to know not to disobey her in one of these moods and he was over to her in a flash.

"Come on, we've got to find him"

"What if he just needs some space?"

Jenny shot him a fiery stare making him blither in response,

"You're right! Never mind what I said, he must be found!"

As the two walked off out of the clearing Jenny left them with once final command,

"The rest of you get looking!"

The gathered Jellicles were left not feeling entirely settled after all that. Once the tension seemed to dissipate a little Electra turned to Etcetera and said, "Wow. Skimble's whipped"

"You've got that right"

* * *

Misto had heard his name being called for a while now. At first it had been a negligible echo coming from somewhere but now he knew it wasn't just a figment of his imagination. Surely everyone knew by now that he was missing again and he started to feel guilty that they might be wondering if he'd run away for a second time – or third if anyone was keeping a serious score.

He just didn't want to talk to anyone at all. He was simply not in the mood and the very thought of getting up and showing everyone he was safe seemed like far more effort than it was worth. What's more his need for catnip hadn't gone away and the shakes he was experiencing were keeping him feeling crappy. In time they had brought along their friends stomach-ache and chills and now they all seemed to be having a mad party inside the tux. As he lay there Misto tried to deal with his withdrawal symptoms but every road he tried to use to get out of them inevitably lead him back to the sweet taste of catnip. If only he could have just a little taste, surely that would be enough, right? It wouldn't have to be much; the tiniest sniff would surely tide him over. He wanted it and he wanted it bad and before when he had been feeling stupid for having kissed Tugger he didn't seem to care about that anymore. Catnip was all that was on his mind and he had to figure out how to get some. Surely someone in the junkyard must have some stuffed away. Misto frowned when he realised that if anyone had any then it would most likely be Tugger and once again he felt like an idiot for being dependant on him for even this. It was staggering how much of his life had become dependant on him and it pissed him off. Why wasn't he his own cat anymore? It wasn't fair! He had been completely independent before they'd gotten together – or more or less - so where along the way had he lost his sense of personal identity? Could he get it back if he wanted to?

'_Sure I can!'_ thought Misto as he gritted his teeth. If he was going to take control of his own life again then he was going to do it properly and the first thing that sprung to mind with this newfound courage was getting some catnip. He closed his eyes momentarily as he thought about how he really shouldn't but then he decided he wasn't going to be slave to anyone or anything – even his own feelings. If he wanted some catnip then he would damn well have it, it was his choice and no one could stop him!

Getting out of the junkyard was going to be tricky though. Before when he might just slip out unnoticed was no longer an option since his magic had stopped working. He would have to time it perfectly and make sure no one saw him at all. How was that possible though when it seemed the entire tribe was now searching for him?

Misto sat up and started thinking while he tried to manage his shakes. He would do this somehow.

* * *

Bomba stood looking at herself in the mirror with her hands on her growing bump. She rubbed at it gently and sighed as she remembered how slim and sexy she used to feel. If ever there was anything that acted as more of a tom-repellent this was it. It came with so many other things aside from that as well and Bomba wondered why on earth anyone would willingly do it. Still, she had been feeling a little differently lately. At first she had hated this kitten, it was just an inconvenience in her life and had caused so much trouble around her. Now that she'd had some time to get used to it she had realised that it was a real, live kitten growing inside her and she sort of liked the idea of having someone so dependant upon her.

She continued to rub her belly and as she carried on staring at the image that was reflected back at her the sighing she had done faded away and was replaced with a gentle smile. She was going to be a mother and for some crazy reason that she couldn't figure out she was happy about that.

Her little moment of bonding with her unborn kitten was abruptly interrupted when Jenny noisily entered her den with very little announcement.

"Are you okay, Jenny?" asked Bomba when she saw the look on the tabby queen's face.

"Sorry to burst in, dear, but have you seen Misto?"

"No, should I have done?"

"He's gone missing again, the silly boy. I need to get him back so I can take care of him; he's nowhere near ready to go out on his own yet"

"Oh…well, if I see him I'll be sure to send him back"

"Thank you, dear" said Jenny as she turned back around and exited the den. Once she had gone Bomba stood there wondering what on earth had inspired Misto to go walkabout again. He must have known he was ill and that getting up would be a bad idea but then again he was acting very strangely when she had gone to see him the previous day. Maybe he was temporarily a tad loopy and had recovered just enough to provide him with strength to actually get up and start walking around. Bomba rolled her eyes as she wondered what had gotten into him and tried to think where he might have gone. It didn't take too long for her to think about Tugger and she tossed that thought back and forth before she took any action. Okay, yes Misto and Tugger were in a bad place at that time but love never really goes away. Maybe Misto had decided to try and talk to Tugger and maybe he was perfectly fine and sitting in his den right at that moment. It sounded a bit farfetched but where else might he have gone? Bomba decided to try and help as best she could and started to head over to Tugger's den.

When she got there she found him in the strangest of positions. He was sat on his bed with his head propped up by his paws but he didn't seem to be looking at anything in particular. His expression was pretty grim and he didn't even look up when she entered. Gently she announced herself,

"Tug? Are you alright?"

A few moments later Tugger replied with simply "Jenny already came looking, Misto's not here"

Bomba could instantly tell there was more to be told just by the tone of his voice and she simply couldn't shake the need to delve a little deeper,

"You sound a bit lost"

Tugger chuffed as soon as she said it as 'lost' was certainly not strong enough a word. He was downright stupefied and before when he thought he might have had a clearer path towards getting Misto back he was now left in riddles trying to figure out what had happened and what to do about it. Realising he hadn't replied yet he tried to think of something to say,

"I am" was all he managed

"Well, tell me about it"

"Do I have to?" he asked dreading the answer

"You'll only be screwing yourself over if you don't"

Tugger let out a long sigh and closed his eyes before he managed to pluck up the strength to describe the previous night's confusion.

"Last night, either really late or early in the morning I woke up and found Misto standing in the doorway. He was just staring with a look that was just…I don't know. It was kind of like he was trying to figure something out but at the same time like he was in awe. He stood there for a while and then he said he missed me and needed me"

Bomba's face lit up at hearing what Misto had said. Finally, it seemed like they were on the road to recovery! Her hopes were unfortunately quashed when Tugger carried on,

"I tried to talk to him but then he cut me off and got really close. He put his paws on me and then in a flash he kissed me. It was so quick but it felt so good and I really loved it and I tried to make it deeper. As soon as I touched him though he jumped back and looked terrified. I tried to stop him but he ran off again and I didn't follow. I just don't know what to make of that…"

Bomba sat herself down and looked at Tugger. He was right: that was really strange. At least they knew why Misto had run off though.

"You haven't seen him since?" she asked

"No"

"Right." Bomba was quiet again as she tried to think of something useful to say but it was clear that this whole situation was getting more messed up by the day. What did this mean? According to Tugger Misto had said he still needed him and it sounded like he wanted them to be back together but then he went and ran away. "What is going on with you two?" asked Bomba with fatigue in her voice.

"I wish I knew" moped Tugger, "I just don't know where to go from here. Does he want me? Doesn't he want me? Does he really love me or not anymore? Tell me, Bomba, please just tell me what to do"

The red queen shook her head in defeat knowing there was nothing she could offer to try and make this any easier.

"I'm sorry, Tug, I don't know"

She gently put her paw on top of Tugger's and it was enough to let him know just that. A few moments later he sighed again and buried his face in his paws and the sight really worried her that things were getting gradually worse for both he and Misto. Where before it seemed like there was a clear enough chance that they might be able to smooth things over – however small that chance may have been – it now seemed to be getting further and further away. As a result the possibility of them not being able to survive this ordeal as mates was becoming more likely and it really saddened Bomba to think that they might break up. Nobody wanted that but what was the chance that it wouldn't happen now?

* * *

Misto bit his lip hard as he tried to quell his need for catnip. If he could ignore the desperate cravings for just one minute then he might be able to actually formulate a plan for getting out of the junkyard and getting the sweet herb that was calling his name. The need was getting worse now and the pains in his stomach and head were starting to thump as they intensified their protests. Misto had to use all his strength in stopping himself from falling back and writhing around inside the pipe and he continued to bite down on his lip and grab his ears tightly in an attempt to distract himself from the craving.

Making one last leap for clear thought he came to the conclusion that he needed to be discreet in getting out of the junkyard and straight away he crept to the pipe's opening and peered out secretly. No one seemed to be around and he felt a pang of shame inside as he realised they must all have been out looking for him. Taking a few more moments to make sure the coast was absolutely clear he delicately lifted his leg forward and placed it on the ground outside the pipe. He pushed himself upwards and once upright flicked his head back and forth to check that no one was spying on him. The first step he took forward was slow and he kept his wits about him but then as he took more they got faster and faster and pretty soon he was sprinting for the junkyard's entrance. In a flash he was gone from the yard and had taken off down the street. At the very end he flew around the corner and threw himself against a brick wall that was out of sight of his home. He panted heavily and looked back and forth to make sure no one had seen him and he stood there for a few moments trying to catch his breath and deal with the adrenaline. His shakes seemed to have subsided for the time being now that he was outside but in their place were the stomach pains from before that had decided to make their return at this very crucial time. Misto tried not to move so as not to aggravate the cramps that would surely cripple him and once the wave of potential pain seemed to pass he started forward on his search for catnip. He knew he had thrown it away somewhere so all he had to do was remember where it was he had done so. The problem was he didn't really know where that was so after a few moments of thinking he decided to do his best to retrace the steps he probably took on his way back home from the city. Hopefully he'd find his pouch, he was desperate!

* * *

Hours passed with Misto trawling the streets searching for his lost pouch of catnip. He kept going through different feelings of both feeling glad and stupid for having thrown it away in the first place as well as feelings of being the most shameful beast in creation alternating with being the strongest he'd ever felt. Deep down he knew he was not well but he just didn't care at that moment. All he wanted was his fix and he wasn't about to give up. Misto knew what kind of reward was waiting for him; it was bliss. Just a single sniff of the 'nip and he'd be in a world of ecstasy. That initial rush and then the all-encompassing strength and courage that meant he could do anything in the world was all going to be his once more. There was truly no other feeling like it and the very thought of it only spurred Misto on further. At times his teeth chattered and his paws shook in anticipation and whenever he thought about bringing that pouch to his nose a smile crept across his lips. It was going to be so good! So wonderful! He could be free again!

That though was if he could find the dratted thing. He'd been searching for what seemed like ages now and his stomach cramps weren't getting any better. He was hungry but he tried to put it to the back of his mind. That was hard when his mind was aching more by the minute and he hated having to go through all of this. He knew the catnip would help though, it had done before and it would again. Turning another corner Misto leant against a lamppost and stood there for a moment to try and clear his thoughts. He was clearly a wreck and he needed help and as he steadied himself he felt a weird, jolting shudder move through his body starting in his legs and quickly moving upwards. It left him holding onto the lamppost with both paws and wondering what had just happened. He felt scared by the sudden shiver and he knew it couldn't have been good.

'_Everlasting Cat, Misto! Just go home!'_ shouted his mind. He knew it made sense but there was no going back now, not yet. He needed his 'nip.

Shuffling over to the curb he sat down on the edge and put his chin in his paws which he propped on his knees. Very slowly he then started to massage his temples to try and clear some of the tension that lingered within. He was left with a strange, congested feeling that resulted from his conflicting emotions and he just wanted them all to go away. All of this was because he couldn't figure out how to deal with Tugger and he really felt it was killing him. It seemed one part of him wanted to dump the useless Coon like the idiot he was and another part was still desperately in love with him. As he sat there Misto decided those two feelings – though opposing – could still sit annoyingly inside him without being of a conflicting nature so as to not be capable of doing so but he realised above it all that they didn't help him come to a decision. He supposed he didn't want to break up with Tugger but neither did he want to just run back to him. He didn't even know what he'd do if he did decide to take him back and he also felt so guilty for keeping Tugger waiting. He knew the moron would wait for him forever if he wished it but Misto knew he couldn't do that. He couldn't just let Tugger live in hope if nothing was there. There was something there though, wasn't there? There was definitely something still there and it begged to be let out from its prison that Misto had locked it in inside himself. That was what made him angry; no matter how much he hated Tugger for cheating on him he so desperately loved him that he couldn't cut him out of his life. He may have wanted to at times but he just couldn't. Why was that? Was there something he knew but hadn't realised? Was he just not strong enough? Was this really as big a deal as it seemed? He just didn't know and that's why he was so angry with it all. He hated not knowing and right there on the curb he slammed his fist down hard onto the concrete next to him.

Straight away he cracked his eyes open and stared down at the paw which he had just battered. As he moved it slightly pain shot up his arm and he winced as it hurt him. It didn't feel broken but he could tell that was a stupid thing to have done and it would surely bruise and be painful for days now. He sighed as he considered it just one more thing to add to the list.

It was then that something behind his paw caught his eye. Looking behind it he focused on something dirty and small sitting in the gutter below him and he craned his neck forward to get a better look at it. As he started to see what it was his curious expression cracked into joy and a big smile spread across his face as he looked down upon what he had been searching for. There in the gutter amongst dust and dead leaves sat his lost pouch of catnip and he gleefully jumped down to pick it up. As he grabbed it he brushed away some of the filth that clung to the material and it wasn't long before it looked back to its original dirty appearance opposed to the new one it had temporarily adopted. A great wave of relief washed over him as he hugged the thing to his chest and after a few moments he brought it a few inches from his nose to see if it was still useable.

Gently sniffing the pouch he felt a tingling somewhere in his head and suddenly he felt very warm. His smile grew wider when he found that although it had gotten a little weaker it was still perfectly potent and he knew a good drag on it would send all his problems flying away.

He was about to start huffing away when a thought stopped him: He was in no fit state to get high outside the junkyard. If he fell down there was probably no chance of him being found and since he was still quite weak there was always the possibility that he might not get back up again. If he was going to do this he needed somebody to be nearby if things started going wrong and he reluctantly decided to return to the junkyard before he started up.

If Misto were in the right mind he most certainly would have known that bringing catnip within a mile of the junkyard would see him into a huge heap of trouble but at that moment it went without saying that rational thought had left him. Before he could even tell he was moving Misto was heading back home with a stupid smile on his face and at that moment the euphoria that hung around him made him feel as if he were invincible.

* * *

The day seemed to start dragging on and everyone's efforts in searching for Misto seemed to have become all for nothing. Munk had been searching just like everyone else and as he watched everyone get tired and bored he really felt the morale of the junkyard was being dragged down. He liked Misto but running away this time seemed pretty selfish and he was starting to get annoyed with the tom. While he understood that Misto was not in a good place at that point he nevertheless felt he ought to try and take control. Then again, was that too much to ask? What would he do if Demeter did the same thing to him? Probably not run away but there was no telling how he might react. Just the thought of Demeter sleeping with someone else made him feel uneasy and he could tell just how much of a tremor that would cause in their relationship. Maybe, then, it was too much to ask of Misto to try and deal with his problems quietly and maybe his running off again was just his way of trying to gain some clarity. He must have been smothered here with everyone hanging around and trying to talk to him and see that he was okay. Still, Munk felt bad that once again he'd let Misto slip through the net and as a result he was probably not safe. Maybe he was crying out for attention or for somebody to talk to but then again plenty of cats had tried. In all seriousness what was going on?

As he carried on Munk he wished that sometimes the cats in that place might stop and spare a thought for his stress levels before they did anything but he pretty much knew that wasn't going to happen any time soon. As protector he was eternally bound to being close to tearing his fur out from the stress he was put through by the tribe he looked after and over time he'd sort of come to deal with that. Still, it didn't stop him from worrying about Misto and he really wished he had at least a general idea of where he was. At least then he'd know whether or not the tux could look after himself or not.

The silver tabby looked up into the sky and saw the sun had started to descend now. It was probably about mid-afternoon and everyone had been looking since some time in the morning. Was it really worth it anymore? Collectively they'd probably covered the whole junkyard and if they hadn't found him by now then they probably weren't going to. Misto would once again come back in his own time and they just had to be patient.

Munk took in a big breath and then let it out very slowly. It was something his father had taught him to do when he felt everything was getting on top of him and most of the time it seemed to work. Briefly he felt the stress become lightened for a few moments and he seemed to feel his blood pressure ease up just a little bit as well. Once finished he opened his eyes and started to walk back to the clearing while thinking on the way that he's really like to ask Skimble if he could borrow some tea. Camomile would work a treat right about now and he hoped the ginger tabby might have some.

As he re-entered the clearing he paused when he heard a gentle giggling coming from somewhere. He stood at the edge looking around for a few moments as he tried to pinpoint the source and as he let his senses guide him he was drawn towards the pipe Misto used to live in. He furrowed his brow for a second or two as he wondered who or what might be emitting the sound and at first he thought of the kittens. They surely wouldn't have been searching for Misto for very long and had probably come back earlier and were now hiding in that pipe. The voice didn't seem all that kittenish though. It sounded young but still like it should have come from someone older.

Rolling his eyes he started towards the pipe and once he got over to it he bent down and looked into the gloom. Inside he could see the dark shape of a cat laying on the ground and racking with the soft giggles he'd heard as soon as he came back into the clearing. As he let his eyes adjust a little more he started to see more features belonging to this cat and when the white patches of fur came to light he put two and two together to see that this was the cat they had been searching for all day.

With a relieved but frustrated sigh he closed his eyes and took a moment to allow himself to feel calmer. At least now he could stop worrying.

"Misto?" he asked firmly into the shade of the pipe hoping the tux wouldn't be in too much of a state to talk to him. What was strange was that the giggling became stronger and turned into raucous laughter as soon as he said the young tom's name. Munk puzzled as he watched Misto spin around onto his back and clutch his stomach as he tried to contain the hilarity. Had he gone mad? Had the strain of the ordeal finally gotten to him and pushed him over the edge? Munk felt a little uneasy and decided to ask again,

"Misto, what's going on?"

Suddenly the laughing stopped and Misto bolted up looking at Munk fiercely. The silver tabby was taken aback at the sudden reaction and he didn't know what to do to respond to the tux's strange actions. Together they remained looking at each other in complete stillness until Misto blew a huge raspberry from his lips and started laughing again.

Was he drunk? Had he gone out and gotten wasted during the morning without any of them knowing? He was certainly acting like an inebriate and Munk thinned his lips in gentle acceptance.

"Come on, Misto" said Munk reaching into the pipe and trying to pull him out, "Let's get you back to Jenny's"

No sooner had Munk touched him did Misto bolt forward and out of the pipe. He stood out in front in an attack posture while Munk just stared on in surprise. The black and white tom was looking across the junkyard with wide eyes and his ears back seeming as if he were about to pounce. That is exactly what happened a few seconds later and he darted off across the clearing and threw himself at the junk on the other side with a huge clatter. Immediately he started hacking at it and clawing his way through sending tin cans and toilet paper rolls flying in every direction. Munk just gazed on in surprise and then ran over to try and see what he was doing.

"Misto, really, what's going on?"

"It's a mouse!" cried Misto, "I've got to get it! It ran right in there!"

Munk looked into the junk but there was quite clearly nothing hidden away.

"Are you sure, Misto?"

"Yes! Don't be stupid! It's right there, can't you see?" spat the smaller tom

"No. There's nothing there"

"There is! There is!" shouted Misto as he continued to claw at the junk. Munk had no idea what was going on but he could tell Misto was loopy. He had to get him back to Jenny right now and he started to pull at Misto's shoulders to try and get him to stop.

"Misto, come on, there's nothing there. How about we go back to Jenny, eh?"

"Get off!" shouted Misto as he spun around and swiped at Munk with his claws bared. He missed but the tabby jumped back in shock at the violent gesture. "Get the hell away! It's my mouse! Mine! Understand? I saw it first so you can't have it!"

"There's nothing there, Misto! What's gotten into you?"

"Shut up and fuck off!" screamed the tux leaving Munk even more shocked. Misto never, ever swore. He was far too polite to even think about using those words and it left Munk reeling for a few seconds as he tried to come to terms with Misto actually having said that.

When he came back he could see Misto had resumed his frantic clawing and he knew at that point he had to step in properly. In a quick, twisting motion Munk grabbed Misto by the shoulders, spun his arms around his front and pinned him to the ground hard. Misto let out a loud cry of protest when he realised he'd been tackled and tried his hardest to wriggle out of it.

"Let me go! Let me go! I hate you!" he shouted as he twisted and shook but it was no use. Munk was far too skilled to be out-wrestled and he put all his weight on top of the smaller tom to keep him where he was.

As the minutes ticked by Misto started to realise what had happened and as the catnip started to wear off his bids for freedom became less and less frantic. Soon enough he stopped and just lay there with the bigger tom on top of him and he lay his head down on the ground below shamefully. In defeat he closed his eyes and felt the wave of embarrassment wash over him while all his problems from before returned to their original positions within. He always knew this would happen eventually but he had been so desperate for a fix. The post-high headache was starting to come in now and he groaned as it took hold of him. It was not at all pleasant and he really didn't want to have to deal with it on top of all the shame he felt. Munk had seen everything and he knew this was not going to go down well. As a result he just stayed limp there as Munk tentatively got off of him and pulled him up into a fireman's carry. Before he realised it he had been carried back to Jenny's den and laid back down on the bed he had been using. There he let the last few remnants of the catnip dissipate and soon enough he was plunged into a rocky, queasy sleep.

Munk stayed there until Jenny got back and told her everything that had happened. Soon after news began to spread that Misto had been found and everyone gathered outside the den waiting for any more information to come their way. They were all fairly keen to know where he'd gotten to and why he'd gone in the first place but there was one cat that wasn't with them. Munk was still stunned from everything he had seen and he wondered what might have made Misto so crazy in the first place.

As he walked around the junkyard carrying a huge cup of camomile tea Skimble had made for him along with a relieved smile he came to the place where the pipe stuck out of the junk. Feeling nosy he bent down and took another look inside. From the exterior it seemed nothing was particularly out of the ordinary and so he placed his tea down on the ground and pressed on a little further. It was easier to see when he got inside the pipe and he started to sift through the few items that littered the floor. Everything seemed pretty normal as he seemed to find only the odd blanket or dice scattered around but everything changed when he found a small, cloth pouch. The silver tabby puzzled at it as he lifted it in his paw and wondered what Misto would want with such a nasty looking thing. Inquisitively he brought it close to his nose, sniffed gently and suddenly felt his mind go quite fuzzy. Straight away everything came together and everything he had seen made sense. He had been around long enough to know what catnip smelt like – he had been given enough grief with Tugger using it in previous years – and he suddenly felt very disappointed in the little tux that lay in Jenny's den.

"Oh, Misto…" he whispered as he closed his eyes and shook his head gently from side to side. He had really expected more of him and his heart sank as he thought about him using the terrible herb.

For a few moments he sat there and tried to think of where to go from there. He knew getting off this wasn't going to be a pleasant experience for Misto but that was definitely what was going to happen. He wasn't about to let anybody bring catnip into his junkyard – especially not with kittens running around – and he left the pipe to discreetly dispose of the pouch while everyone else stayed outside Jenny and Skimble's den.

In a way he sort of felt bad for Misto. The poor tux was it such a state as it was and it didn't quite seem fair that he was going to receive a monumental reprimand on top of that for the 'nip. Maybe he should just tell Jenny and let her tear him a new one for the both of them. Either way this was not going to stand regardless of how bad a place Misto was in right now. No one was huffing catnip on Munk's watch and he was going to drive that into the tux whatever it took.

**Misto's gonna get bollocked so hard!**

**So I realise that Bomba's probably going through her own troubles what with the kitten and all but I haven't spoken much about her. I thought about putting more in this chapter but I couldn't really think of how to fit it in unless I put on the voice of the narrator of Superfriends and said: "Meanwhile, in Bombalurina's uterus…" That probably would not have been good. I'll get some more of her in the next chapter which will be along soon.**

**Happy Easter, y'all! X**


	15. Try And Get Out Of That, Misto

**So sorry it took nearly two weeks to get this one out. Things have been hectic!**

**Lady Admetus & Delphicoracle-cat: What kind, thoughtful reviews! Thank you ever so much. It's nice to know people aren't too bothered with Bomba since it's hard to switch focus effectively. I won't forget her but I'm glad I can stop worrying about not putting enough of her in.**

**This is another long one I'm afraid. Sorry but it flows a lot better if I include everything I've written and it sets up the next chapter quite nicely. Hope that's okay!**

**British Colloquialism: 'Bollocking'; when a person is reprimanded fiercely. Not sure if that's something people say outside the UK. It derives from the act of castration since 'bollocks' is another word for testicles and to be totally humiliated is like taking away someone's masculinity (castration).**

**Love Is No Fairytale**

**Chapter 15**

**Try And Get Out Of That, Misto**

Like a gentletom Munk had kept the news of Misto's hidden catnip usage on a need to know basis. At first he had been too disappointed to even think about dealing with the problem but then he had finished his tea in Misto's pipe and come to the decision that this really didn't need to be heard by too many ears. As such he had waited for a while until the crowd at Jenny's doorway had dispersed and then gone and told her what he thought he knew. Straight away she got herself into a tizzy and it took both he and Skimble to guide her to a chair where they managed to get her to rein it in. Like the mother-hen she was Jenny had allowed herself to get furious enough to practically scalp Misto for even touching catnip and it took a lot of calming, convincing reassurance from the two toms that stood by to stop her from storming over to her passed-out patient and shaking him until his eyes popped out.

Now that a lot of time had passed the three sat around looking at Misto feeling sorrier than they had done earlier for his plight. Clearly things were much worse than they appeared and it made them feel stupid for not having seen Misto was in such a bad place sooner. They had wanted to help but they hadn't realised they needed to try harder so that Misto would be able to open up. At times they had thought that Misto needed his space but that had been rare. Poor Misto was in a far deeper mess than they had imagined and they knew that he was no longer safe to be out of their sights even for a moment. It was a tough decision and it made them feel guilty but eventually they decided to tie Misto down to the bed; at least this way he wouldn't be able to run off again – especially since they knew the craving for catnip would be all too tempting for him to resist.

When they had finished they remained silent and watched Misto sleep soundly. He was so ill and it made them all feel really low to think that one of their own had been physically, mentally and emotionally tortured so badly. No Jellicle was ever meant to be subjected to the sorrows that Misto clearly had and it was especially hard for Munk to look down on him like he was. He was meant to prevent things like this in any way he could and he hated that it all had happened somehow or other. Hopefully getting Misto off the catnip would make him feel like he was doing something right again and he really hoped hard.

After having done all of this Skimble had suggested telling Tugger about what they thought they knew about his mate. Surprisingly Jenny had agreed and unfortunately for Munk it eventually came down to him to go and break the news. Feeling the stress bubble up inside him again Munk had just nodded and left the den to do so.

* * *

Tugger stood in his den with a thoughtful look on his face. He had long given up moping and feeling at a loss over what had happened between him and Misto a couple of nights ago and he had come back to the thought process he had originally been on. So they had a slip up, at least it meant that Misto still felt something for him. True, it would probably be harder for him to break the little tom's shell now that he was the one that was acting strangely but it was a challenge that Tugger relished the thought of tackling. If he could get Misto to open up to him again he knew he could charm him into taking him back. At least he hoped he could, after all it had never failed before.

Tugger hopped around excitedly as he felt he was getting closer to a good plan – bearing in mind that a good plan in Tugger's mind was probably somewhat questionable for a normal cat. He felt that perhaps he was on the verge of a breakthrough and any minute now he would happen upon the exact method of getting Misto back. In a small way he probably knew it was a bit stupid but he was too happy about feeling better again to care. Misto would definitely take him back soon; it was only a matter of time.

Tugger was so lost in quick thought that he didn't hear Munk climbing up the junk to his den and enter quietly.

"Tugger?" asked Munkustrap lowly but in his usual firm, eloquent voice.

"Yeeees?" said Tugger comically as he spun around and faced his brother, "Alright, Munk? Good to see you!"

Munkustrap puzzled for a moment over his brother's newfound good mood and sighed quietly when he realised this was going to be harder than he'd hoped it would be.

"Tugger, sit down. There's something I need to tell you"

"Can't stop now, bro, I'm in the middle of something"

"What?"

"Thinking things through and I'm on a role"

Munk thought about making a jokey comment about Tugger actually thinking for once but decided now was not the time to tease. Taking the lead he turned over an old baked bean can and sat down on it hoping the action might encourage Tugger to do the same. Eventually the maned tom gave in and followed suit by sitting on his bed.

"Make it quick, Munk"

The silver tabby took a moment to look around the den before he started talking and he was surprised to see everything in such disarray. Clearly it was Misto that did all of the tidying in this relationship and he wondered if Tugger ever thanked him for it.

"Munk?" asked Tugger again making the silver tom snap out of his thoughts.

"Right, sorry. Okay, I'm sure you heard we found Misto again"

"You did? That's good but no, nobody told me"

"I see…well, the thing is…things have gotten worse"

Tugger's happy expression seemed to falter for a second and Munk could see a hint of worry appear in his eyes as the joyfulness he held started to slip away.

"Worse?" he asked tentatively

"Yes. It seems that…Misto didn't tell us about something he got up to when he was away"

"What do you mean?"

Munk looked up to meet his brother's eyes, "He's on catnip, Tugger, and I think the reason he ran away this time was because he was craving it"

Tugger was quiet for a moment with the happiness before having completely left him now. In its place was much deeper worry but in his head he just felt exhausted. So many times had he been given hope and then had it taken away only to get it back and then have it taken away again. The whole charade was becoming so tiring and he just wanted it to stop now.

A few moments later he looked up, "Catnip?"

"I think so. He seemed completely whacked out and when I looked through his pipe he had some of it in a pouch. I have no idea where he got it from though"

"Are you sure?"

"Pretty sure"

"Everlasting Cat" sighed Tugger, "Where is he now?"

"Back at Jenny's and he's staying there this time"

"What do you mean?"

Munk looked a little uncomfortable, "We decided it was in his best interests that he stay there without any chance of getting away until he's well again. That being said we've tied him down so he won't be able to slip away"

"What?" asked Tugger disbelievingly.

"We tied him down. It's the only way we can stop him running off to find more catnip"

"Everlasting Cat, Munk!" said Tugger angrily and getting up, "You can't just tie him up like some stupid pollicle! He's been through so much and he doesn't need us making him feel even worse. What does he have to say about all of this?"

"He doesn't know yet. He blacked out when he came down from the 'nip and as far as I know he hasn't woken up yet"

"Oh, for goodness sake…" began Tugger and then stopped. He stood there and pinched the bridge of his nose as he tried to come to terms with what Munk had said they'd done to his mate and a few moments later he sighed and looked up to the ceiling. "I'm going to see him"

"Tug, do you really think that's a good idea?"

Tugger shot his brother a stiff glare, "Of course I do, he's my bloody mate!"

"But…you know…" said Munk as he reached out to his brother.

"He's my mate," said Tugger again, "and he's not well. I need to be there for him despite everything else. I still love him and he still loves me…I think. I'm going and that's that!"

Munk watched as his brother stormed out and rolled his eyes before following him.

Tugger hurried across the clearing and bounded up the junk in front of Jenny's den in only two strides. In his usual rude fashion he burst straight into her den and looked across to where he knew Misto would be laying. There he was, his perfect little mate strapped down to the bed with several human belts. It took Tugger a little by surprise to see him that way but then he just felt pity. Poor Misto, this was really going to make him feel crappy.

Jenny didn't bother with chastising the maned tom for barging in, she had tried a hundred times before and if he didn't get it by now then what hope was there that he ever would? As she tried to stifle a yawn she went to join Tugger who had made his way over to Misto's side and sat down while looking at him sadly. She placed a paw on his shoulder as he stared down at his sleeping mate solemnly.

"I suppose you've heard?"

Tugger nodded slowly without saying anything.

"He's in good hands dear, we'll see he gets off of it soon enough"

With that she left them alone in the quiet of the den and Tugger reached his paw up to stroke the fur on Misto's chest between the straps of the belts. He didn't know if Misto could hear him but he spoke softly nonetheless.

"Hi, Misty. Here we are again then, eh?"

Misto just lay still and so Tugger reached down to take his paw.

"Listen, babe, I don't care what you say, I'm staying with you this time. You can yell and scream if you want but I'm not leaving you alone while you get through this. I've seen cats try to get off catnip before and it's not pretty; you'll need help and I promise I'm gonna give it to you…I love you"

As soon as he finished Misto's head started to tilt slightly and Tugger perked up as he saw his mate coming back to life. As the seconds ticked by Misto cracked open his eyes and blinked as he adjusted to the light of the den.

"Tug?" he asked quietly as he lay there groggily

"I'm here, sweetheart," said Tugger as he gripped his paw a little tighter.

"What happened?"

"Shh" shushed Tugger as the smaller tom lay there, "don't worry about that now. Just take it easy"

Misto let out a heavy sigh and groaned in his throat as he started to feel the post-catnip headache start to take hold of him. It was such a distinctive kind of headache that Misto suddenly didn't have to ask what had happened anymore. The pain in his head and stomach was all too characteristic of a catnip binge and he felt guilty that he'd gone back to it after he had promised himself that he wouldn't. Above it all he was desperately thirsty and he tried to sit up so he could get off the bed and find some water. He opened his eyes wider when he found he couldn't straighten himself up and gasped when he saw several brown, leather bands strapped across him. He struggled and tried to shake out of them but it was no use; he was stuck and he wasn't going anywhere.

"Tugger…what's all this?" he asked with a dry voice and looking over to his mate.

Tugger shook his head and looked down, "Sorry, Misto, Munk and Jenny thought it would be a good idea since they found out you were…on the 'nip"

Misto's mouth fell open and then he closed his eyes when it hit him that his secret had been found out. He let his head fall back down on the pillow below in dismay when he realised that and he groaned again as the guilt became stronger.

"It's okay, darling" said Tugger gently, "everything's gonna be okay"

"Can you please untie me?" asked Misto as he tried to sound more together.

"Sorry, Misty, protector's orders"

Misto looked at him, "Don't call me Misty, and please just do it"

Tugger shook his head.

"Tugger!" said Misto more surprised than angry, "This isn't fair, let me up!"

Tugger squeezed Misto's paw as he tried to make eye contact but Misto – realising that Tugger was holding it – shook him away.

"Misto, think about it. Pretty soon you'll want some catnip again and we all know you're too wily for us to keep track of you. Now, you know how bad those cravings can be and you also know that this is the only way you can be stopped from getting some more"

"Don't be stupid! I can control myself!" said Misto angrily

"Yeah, right. Because you really were strong enough last time!" said Tugger sarcastically and making Misto feel even lower.

A few moments later Misto closed his eyes and looked away, "Just go away, Tug…"

Tugger thinned his lips in a half-smile, "Not on your life, Mistykins" he said as he took Misto's paw again.

"I don't want to be near you"

"Tough, I'm here for you"

"I don't want you to be"

"Too bad, I'm not going anywhere"

Misto was silent for a second and then decided to jump straight to the big guns,

"I haven't forgiven you for sleeping with Bomba, that's why I don't want you here"

Tugger's smile faltered a little but then a look of sincerity came over him,

"I know, but now that you really need somebody I'm gonna be here to start showing you how much you mean to me and how much I love you and how much I need you"

"I don't need anybody…" lied Misto feeling stupid in his heart for going so blatantly against the truth.

"Sure you do," said Tugger with a more heartfelt smile and with that he bent down to kiss Misto's paw. When he came back up the two just looked at each other for a long time. Neither one really knew what to say at that point, everything seemed pretty surreal.

"If I had my magic…" said Misto eventually

"Sucks, doesn't it?" replied Tugger smugly

* * *

Hours passed while Tugger tried to make small talk but Misto didn't really respond all that well. He was angry that Tugger thought he could just sit there without budging when he really didn't want him to be. It wasn't fair since he couldn't get away and he really felt stupid for being forced to stay where he was.

When the time came for more food Misto felt even worse for needing to be fed. If that wasn't enough he was made to feel even angrier when Tugger took great delight in feeding him and he reluctantly swallowed down the delicious cat food that Jenny had brought over. For a short period of time he started to feel ungrateful and selfish for being so objected to what was happening but he still managed to cling on to feeling angry.

When he had finished they were back to the small talk again and Misto started to feel quite bored for being forced to listen to Tugger prattle on about anything and everything. His mind was made to feel so numb that he barely felt the catnip cravings creep up on him again and it wasn't until Tugger stopped abruptly and asked him if he was alright that Misto realised anything was wrong. Suddenly he found he was shivering slightly and that the evil little nag in the back of his mind started to sing to him once more. Misto closed his eyes as he felt the hunger for catnip rise up inside him again and he did his absolute best to try and ignore the growing need.

Tugger took his paw and started to speak to him as calmly as he could,

"It's okay, babe, I'm here. Just try and work through it and I promise you'll come out the other side"

Misto remained quiet aside from the occasional groan and kept his eyes closed as he tried to shut out his own thoughts which he knew was stupid to even try. Pretty soon the craving escalated to a new level and started to roar like a tiger in a cage begging to be let out. The small tom bit his lip as he struggled to keep hold of his common sense but in the end it was no use. Just like his sense of pride it started to slip away and it wasn't long before he started to tell himself he really needed to get up and find some 'nip.

"Jenny! Jenny!" called Misto as he struggled to keep it together. The tabby queen soon came running and took a look at what was happening. A look of glumness immediately came about her and she flicked her eyes downwards as Misto desperately waited for her to say something. When nothing came he spoke up,

"Jenny! Do something!" he pleaded

Jenny just shook her head slowly and sighed, "I'm sorry, dear, there's nothing that can be done. You just have to try and ride it out"

"What?" asked Misto breathlessly as he shook beneath his straps, "I can't hold on like this!"

"You have to try, dear. I'll get you a cold cloth for your head…"

With that she turned and went off into another part of the den in search for one. Misto was left with Tugger still holding onto his paw as he shivered and felt both hot and cold at the same time.

"Tugger!" blurted Misto as he closed his eyes tightly

"I'm here" said the bigger tom and lowered himself so Misto didn't have to strain.

"Help me, Tugger!" begged Misto, "Let me up! I need it! Please, let me up!"

"I can't, darling, I'm sorry but I can't"

"You can! Do it now!"

"I won't. This is what you need. I'm really sorry"

"Are you trying to kill me? I feel like I'm dying! You have to let me up!"

"It's just the cravings talking dear, just ignore them"

"Bah!" blurted Misto sarcastically, "If you were inside my head right now you'd sure change your tune, you bastard!"

Tugger smiled softly and carried on, "You don't mean that"

"I do! You're a total bastard!"

Tugger chuckled, "Okay, okay, fine. I'm a bastard. I'm still not letting you up"

"Please!" begged Misto stringing out the word desperately

"Sorry, Misty"

"Don't call me Misty!"

It was then that Jenny came back with the cool cloth she had gone to find. Very delicately she laid it on the smaller tom's forehead and rubbed behind his ears softly to try and calm him down. After what must have been a good ten minutes Misto's violent cravings started to subside and his shivering started to ease. Not long after that he managed to slip into a snooze and both Jenny and Tugger felt quite relieved that they'd gotten through Misto's first episode of cravings without him getting too bad but to Tugger's dismay the tabby queen quietly informed him that worst was yet to come.

Unfortunately for Misto she was right. Over the next few days every waking moment for him was plagued with a desperate longing for catnip and he was often found begging for release hoping to the Everlasting Cat that one of the cats around him might slip up and let him loose – anything for a sweet taste of catnip once more!

One particular moment had been when Munk came to see him the day after his first bout of intense cravings. The silver tabby had intended to reprimand Misto thoroughly for having played around with catnip in the first place but once he saw Misto shivering under his straps and begging for release he took pity on him and decided to wait. Maybe in the long run it would be better to tell Misto off quietly and let him keep his dignity opposed to tearing him a new one. Munk didn't know; all he did know was that Misto really didn't need to be made to feel any worse and he respected that.

Three days passed with every passing second seeming like a year to the addicted tux in Jenny's den. He had never known life to be so hellish and he often found himself crying in sheer despair. He just wanted it all to end and he hated what a mess his life had become. Above all he was incredibly ashamed and he hated knowing that the whole junkyard now knew of his problem. How was he meant to face them all again?

One thing that had crossed his mind that wasn't to do with shame though was Tugger. That huge idiot had stayed by his side the entire time and had even slept in his seat next to the bed. In his quieter moments Misto had certainly noticed Tugger's support and at times he even felt like Tugger really did mean he loved him. Was that possible though? Sure, Misto still loved Tugger but the only thing still keeping them apart was the fact that Tugger had slept with Bomba. Surely that meant he didn't love him anymore, right? To Misto, love-making was the purest, most fundamental way of showing another that you loved them and if Tugger had done that with Bomba then did that mean what he'd done previously with Misto was a lie? If that was true then why was Tugger there now?

Once again Misto found himself in a conundrum. Tugger had confessed his love so much since he'd been back and every morning when Misto woke up Tugger was waiting to tell him that he loved him. Misto hadn't responded in kind – he wasn't ready to echo the exact sentiment – after all Tugger knew that he still loved him. What Misto needed was some kind of absolute assurance that Tugger really did love him and was sorry for what he'd done. That was the only way he could possibly see taking him back. Or was it? Even if Tugger could do that Misto still didn't know if it was enough. What they'd had before Tugger's 'accident' had happened was so pure and so unbelievably special that Misto didn't know if they could patch it all up. Maybe it was a once in a lifetime kind of thing that if it were to be broken there was no chance of mending it.

Clearly Misto didn't know what to believe and he was stuck in a loop wondering whether or not things could be okay again. Above all he needed someone to pull him out of that loop and that cat needed to be Tugger. So far that hadn't happened and since Misto didn't know that was what he needed the chance of that happening was pretty slim. Perhaps they were doomed to lukewarm promises of love from now on and they'd never achieve the all-encompassing love they once had for a second time.

Aside from this Misto barely had time to think about where he stood on the grounds of love, his mind was well and truly hijacked with thoughts of catnip and as the days went by without it the pain within became worse. He should have known he was getting better; after all he was clever enough to understand that. Jenny had even tried to remind him of that fact on several occasions but it hadn't penetrated the small tom's temporarily thick skull. The only things that were in there at that period in time were catnip and Tugger standing by and it wasn't entirely clear to him which was more important.

* * *

More days passed and Misto once again awoke to the sound of birdsong radiating in from outside the den. As he cracked his eyes open the beautiful sound that he usually loved and was awed by prompted only two words in his aching mind,

'_Shut up!'_ he thought angrily as he tried to come to terms with yet another day where he was restrained against his will acting as only one of his prisons where the other was the grip of catnip cravings. Did the world hate him? Had he fallen so low that now even the birds were singing as loud as they could for the purpose of giving him a headache?

Oddly, Tugger was not awake before him on this morning and Misto watched him as he slept with his head laid on the side of the bed next to his own restrained body. The stillness of the den allowed Misto to think clearly for a the first time in weeks and as he lay there looking at his mate sweet thoughts of times gone by floated through his mind. He had to admit that Tugger really was magnificent-looking despite what he'd done and even now Misto felt his heart flutter a little when he looked across at the bigger tom's beauty. If angels existed then Misto knew they had carved Tugger and the smaller tom felt a few butterflies in his stomach as he thought about how wonderful Tugger could be. Despite everything that had happened Misto knew he was the only cat in the world that knew the real Tugger. The real Tugger was kind, passionate, compassionate and loving – much different from his usual outward brash tom-whoreishness. He had come to know him because he had loved Tugger and…

Something clicked in Misto. For Tugger to have shown Misto his sensitive, loving side that really meant he had loved him. The fact that Tugger was still showing him that side so desperately must have meant that no matter what had happened Tugger did seriously love him and wasn't going to let him go. Was this the assurance Misto had been looking for?

'_Everlasting, Misto! What are you thinking?' _thought the small tom as he tried to make sense of his feelings. He closed his eyes again as he felt his sentiments shift more in the direction of going back to the idiot that lay next to him and as a result he was just made more confused. Why couldn't this be easy? He'd been through enough, hadn't he?

He was gladly afforded relief when he heard a faint clattering in the distance. He opened his eyes again and listened intently as a noise from somewhere disturbed him and he swivelled his ears in the direction of the doorway as he tried to pick out anything distinctive. At first it sounded like two cats fighting but then as it became clearer he made out his sister's high pitched whining and another voice that was all too familiarly ominous.

'_Oh no…'_ thought Misto as he awaited the arrival of the cat he was sure was coming his way and he knew that if Munk hadn't told him off for getting into such a state with catnip by now then this tom certainly wouldn't hold back.

As the voices came closer still Misto started to make out faint words as the cats they originated from started crossing the clearing.

"Dad, please! Don't make a fuss! He's not well!"

"Not well? I don't care if he's just a head on a platter, no son of mine dabbles with such awful things!"

"Come on, Dad! Just wait a few-"

"Victoria, silence! I shan't have you trying to make this easier for him!"

"Dad-"

"No, Victoria!"

Misto then heard the owner of the deeper, more proper, male voice start to ascend the junk outside Jenny and Skimble's den and he braced himself as he waited for the almighty bollocking that was coming his way.

"Mistoffelees!" came the loud boom of Bustopher Jones as he entered the den.

Misto was quiet for a moment hoping his father wouldn't see him and just go away. It was a stupid thing to hope for though as he knew his father had laid eyes upon him as soon as he entered.

"Hi, Dad" he said meekly with his ears back and looking like he'd just been caught lapping at the fresh cream.

"Don't you 'Hi, Dad' me, young man! You've certainly got some explaining to do!"

"Whatever do you mean?" asked Misto feeling he may as well get as much of a laugh out this as he could. There was no possible way he could see this getting any worse.

"Don't you be smart with me!" boomed the pristine Bustopher as he towered over his son, "Whatever were you thinking when you decided to take catnip? Haven't I taught you better than that?"

Misto flicked his eyes downward in shame and flattened his ears accordingly. Now that it was his father scolding him he suddenly felt a whole lot worse about ending up like this.

"Sorry, dad…" he said ever so quietly

"Sorry? You're sorry? You're going to have to do a lot better than that! I want an explanation right now or so help me I'll see you sent off to-"

The upper-class tom was cut off but a loud, rude yawning below and both toms looked down to see Tugger stirring from his lazy sleep on the side of Misto's bed. As he stirred he opened his eyes and blinked at the strange situation he was greeted with and puzzled briefly when he saw Bustopher towering over him.

"What's going on?" he slurred as he started to come to life

Bustopher frowned menacingly at the cat that had corrupted his son below him,

"And you!" he sneered as he raised his spoon high up into the air. Tugger had no time at all to see what was coming before the fat tom brought it down swiftly and cracked him on the head with it. Straight away Tugger let out a drowsy groan and fell off his seat onto the floor in a daze. When the stars disappeared from his vision he looked up from the ground and focused on the tom that had just given him an almighty smack on the noggin,

"Bloody hell! What was that for?" he asked groggily as he rubbed the bump that was already forming

"The same reason as this!" shouted Bustopher as he raised the spoon again and stepped towards the maned tom. Tugger cowered below and screwed his eyes shut as he waited for another blow. Thankfully, Victoria jumped in at that moment and stood over him with her paws up.

"Dad! Calm down! You're making everything worse!"

"Worse?" boomed Bustopher, "If I recall, you said this scoundrel became drunk, slept with that hussy Bombalurina and made her pregnant all behind Mistoffelees' back!"

"She said what?" asked Misto as he watched the spectacle from his bed. Victoria looked over and rubbed her elbow with her opposing paw as the feeling of guilt manifested within.

"I had to tell him, Misto, he's our dad"

"You had to tell him this?"

Victoria didn't respond, she just felt foolish and reflected it in her demeanour. Misto decided he may as well not make her feel bad – after all he'd probably have tattled too – and spoke up for her,

"Don't worry, it's okay"

The white queen gave a sheepish smile as she looked back at her brother but was then distracted by her still fuming father.

"Victoria!" said the fat tux loudly.

"Dad! You hit him hard, he doesn't need any more"

"I didn't need the first one…" said Tugger sarcastically as he started to get up from the floor.

"How dare you!" shouted Bustopher as he squared up to the maned tom, "How dare you mate to my son and then sleep with someone else!"

At that moment Jenny and Skimble ran in having heard the uproar. As soon as they saw what was happening they looked at each other and decided not to make themselves known, after all this could make for great gossip later on – for Jenny at least.

Tugger straightened himself up and looked at the father of his mate. He really didn't know what to say to him to try and make this better so he started with the only thing he could thin of,

"Look, Bustopher, I-"

"Do not call me by my first name!"

"Sorry…sir. Look, I never meant to sleep with Bomba, let alone make her pregnant. It was a mistake"

"A mistake? A mistake he says! Bah!"

"Yes, a mistake" said Tugger more firmly, "I still love your son more than anything in the world and I swear on my own life I will never stop loving him"

Bustopher just looked angrier,

"You expect me to believe that? How dare you try to make a fool of me!"

In a flash he raised his spoon again and Tugger cowered once more but luckily Victoria was right on the ball and stepped in to spare Tugger another whack from the silver utensil-come-walking stick.

"It's the truth, sir, I promise you"

"Just like you promised not to hurt him? I've heard it all before and let me tell you: a leopard never changes his spots. As far as I'm concerned you're no more worthy now to be mated to my Mistoffelees than you ever were!"

Tugger tried to come back at that but ever since Jenny had coined the same phrase it had always cut deep in him. To hear the same thing out loud again brought it all back and straight away he was lost for words.

Misto could see all of this. He could see Tugger had taken a blow and despite feeling a little smug when his father had clocked him he nonetheless felt bad for him now. That was his mate his dad was digging at and despite everything it didn't seem right.

"Dad?" said Misto just loud enough for everyone to hear. Bustopher turned around angrily and glared back at him.

"Don't think I have forgotten you, Mistoffelees!"

"Fine, but please don't be mad at Tugger"

The fat cat looked taken aback.

"I beg your pardon?" he asked in shock

Misto gulped, "Please don't say he's not worth me. I will decide who is good enough for me despite whether I agree with you or not. Right now I don't know what I think but I do know I don't need anyone to decide for me"

"This cat is bad news!" said Bustopher as he pointed at Tugger

"He didn't used to be. I still need to decide what I want to do but in the meantime I don't need anyone deciding for me"

Bustopher stared at Misto for a long while in silence. The tension in the air grew massively as everyone waited for him to respond and after what seemed like forever he did,

"I see"

Misto let out a relieved sigh internally and put on a brave smile as he felt some small victory on his part. It was short-lived as the fat cat continued,

"That doesn't excuse you by any means! You had better start explaining to me why on earth you are taking catnip!"

Misto gulped again and his lip quivered nervously,

"Okay…" he said quietly as he tried to pluck up the courage to tell his father what had happened. He was quiet until Tugger pushed past the fat tom and retook his seat with a defiant stance. He took the smaller tom's paw and squeezed it which clearly ruffled Bustopher but he remained quiet when he saw Misto seem to become a little more confident. Maybe things weren't as bad as Victoria had described despite how awful cheating was in his book.

Misto spent the next hour relating his story, arguing, clarifying, and persuading his father. All the while Tugger stayed where he was occasionally catching the smaller tom's eye. Misto slowly became aware that Tugger was the reason he was feeling so strong all of a sudden and somewhere in the back of his mind it made him feel good. If only he could put that to good use.

Their discussion was long and was an emotional rollercoaster for everyone. Bustopher had gone through many spurts of anger, disappointment, reasoning and at times even guilt. As they all drew to a close the fat tom was left standing across the den facing away from his son and thinking quietly to himself. After a long time had passed without him saying anything Misto spoke up,

"You know I wouldn't have done it had I been in the right mind, Dad, but I'm sure you understand how love when it's diced with makes cats do silly things."

Bustopher sighed heavily as he turned around,

"Yes, I suppose". He then refocused on Tugger and glared slightly again, "That, however, doesn't make up for Rum Tum Tugger's infidelity"

Tugger flicked his eyes down briefly before he felt Misto squeeze his paw. He looked over to see the smaller tom offer a gentle smile which gave him far more strength than he could have expected. Turning his head back to Bustopher he suddenly found the confidence to speak,

"You're right, sir, what I did was inexcusable. If, however, it pleases Misto I will spend the rest of my life showing him how devoted I am to him and I swear to the Everlasting Cat that it will never happen again"

Bustopher eyed him up carefully,

"And what is a promise from you worth, Rum Tum Tugger? It has seemed in the past that you care for no one but yourself and your appearance so how are any of us to believe that you have ever cared for Mistoffelees any more than you have for say…your mane?" he asked sternly and taking the taller tom a little by surprise. Tugger was left not knowing what to say for a few moments as he replayed Bustopher's words in his head. There was truth there, he used to care for only his appearance but that had so surely changed since falling in love with Misto. How could he show that to them all though?

He stopped when across the room he saw a pair of scissors neatly leant against the wall of junk. Feeling his heart start to beat faster while sinking at the same time he took a deep breath and pushed himself up. The other cats watched as he slowly made his way across the den and picked up the sharp object and opening its jaws slowly. Misto watched curiously as his mate stood still for a moment but then his eyes widened when Tugger placed the blades through the fur on his chest.

"Tugger, stop! You don't have to!" said Misto urgently as he realised what the bigger tom was about to do. In response Tugger just turned around and amazingly he had a smile on his face.

"Of course I do. Don't you see? If I do this then everyone including me can see that I care more for you than I do for the next important thing in my life"

"But, Tugger…" breathed Misto quietly. The two shared a quick moment with some kind of airy connection between them before Tugger diverted his eyes down to his chest. In one quick motion he closed the blades of the scissors and a great chunk of his mane started falling to the ground. As it happened everyone flinched and then just stared in amazement at what they were seeing. The Rum Tum Tugger – the vainest, most shallow and self-obsessed of cats – was cutting off his perfectly groomed mane. How was this possible? How could this actually be happening?

Tugger carried on snipping until every part of the mane on his front that he could reach was missing and in its place remained only short, jagged, uneven stubble that was just about as far from perfection as possible.

"There" he said a little shakily showing both pride and malaise, "Now I have nothing left but Misto. Is that enough for you to see that I care for nothing more than him?"

"Goodness…" said Bustopher as he looked at the mass of fur on the ground at Tugger's paws, "I never expected to see that…"

"Well, there it is. I hope you can see my point now"

"I suppose…" said Bustopher after a few moments more.

"Are you alright, Dad?" asked Victoria who could see her father was deeply confused. In all fairness she was just as taken aback as he.

"I think I need a brandy" he replied and looking away from Tugger. In a quick fashion he started to excuse himself, "I think I best be off now, I'm suddenly feeling a little dazed. I'll be back soon and in the meantime I'm sure, son, that you'll kick that disgusting habit of yours. Do you understand?"

"Yes, Dad" said Misto quietly as he watched his father go towards the door. He turned to look at Tugger briefly and looked as if he were about to say something before he turned away and left without another word. Misto and Victoria were left staring over at Tugger who was looking down at the fur he had just sheered from himself. It seemed as if the magnitude of what he'd done was just starting to sink in and he was noticeably a little giddy.

"Tugger?" asked Victoria quietly, "Are you alright?"

The previously maned tom kept looking down at the fur for a few more moments and then shakily looked up at Misto. It seemed that he tried to form a smile and in return Misto suddenly felt incredibly gratified. Tugger had destroyed his precious mane for the simple sake of showing Misto he loved him and would do absolutely anything for him. When he had nothing else to give he literally cut off the fur on his body and to Misto that meant so much.

"Oh, Tugger…" whispered Misto wishing desperately he could get up and go to him. The big idiot looked like he needed someone at that moment and Misto swore he could see the faintest hint of a quiver in the bigger tom's chin. There was no bigger testimony of love for Tugger it seemed and Misto simply couldn't feel angry with him at that moment. All he could feel was love in its purest of forms.

"You didn't have to do that" said Misto gently as the bigger tom came towards him and sat down next to the bed. Tugger took his mate's paw and chuffed timidly at the words,

"Shut him up though, didn't it?"

"Well, yes…but…you did that for me?"

Tugger looked up into Misto's eyes and smiled again,

"I'd do anything for you Misto, that's what I've been trying to show you ever since I made the mistake. You are my world and without you I'm nothing. You make me"

The two just remained in silence for a long time looking into each other's eyes. Victoria's heart soared as Tugger's words hit her and when she felt she couldn't contain her smiles anymore she quietly left them alone.

They were by no means fixed yet, but Misto could feel in his heart that despite all of the awful things that had happened the love he shared with Tugger hadn't gone away. He was absolutely and completely in love with his Rum Tum Tugger and he knew that love would always be there no matter what.

Maybe there really was some way things could be alright again. Maybe.

* * *

Misto had to chuckle to himself. In the days that passed Tugger didn't spend as long at his bedside as he had been doing. He spent a lot more time across the den staring into the mirror with a look on his face that suggested the world had ended. Misto would often have to stop himself from bursting out in raucous laughter when he heard Tugger sigh melodramatically and then turn to him while attempting a soft smile. In the end Misto was happy that despite Tugger so obviously wishing there could have been another way he nonetheless was constantly reminding himself that he had done it for the most important of reasons. It was nice to know he had someone that was standing by him through all of this even though that same cat was the one that had caused the mess in the first place. With each rising of the sun Misto found himself further and further away from feeling angry with Tugger and he was starting to feel close to him once more. In the periods between his craving episodes he allowed himself time to think and now that life was calmer around him – so much so that he quite literally couldn't get up and find himself walking into trouble – he felt less and less repelled by his mate and more attracted. Not attracted from a romantic or sexual point of view specifically – although those were certainly gaining strength – but more in the way that the mist that had clouded the spiritual connection they'd had before was now lifting and he could start to see the reasons he'd fallen in love in the first place. Sure, he was still unhappy with the situation but he didn't really hate Tugger anymore. In fact he supposed he never truly hated Tugger, it was just the feeling at the time; after all how could he hate a cat that he was so in love with?

Another morning came and as Misto had come to expect Tugger was gazing at himself in the mirror. Misto watched him quietly as he pouted slightly and clearly was trying to attract as much attention and pity from anybody that happened to be nearby which just so happened to be only Misto. The tux felt the desire to tease him and call out 'Dear me! You're such a martyr! How will you go on?' but he knew that cutting off his own mane was a big deal to him. He knew Tugger would not respond at all well if he tried to get him to laugh about the situation – at least not yet; maybe in a few years.

"Tugger, come and sit down" said Misto trying to distract him. Tugger tilted his head and sighed dramatically before looking over at Misto and padding over slowly. As he walked he spoke,

"Listen, babe, I've been in here for days. Don't think I don't like being with you but I could really use a walk. Do you mind?"

Misto was a little surprised to hear Tugger would voluntarily go out looking like he did but he supposed it was probably Tugger's resolution to show the rest of the world how much he cared about him. It was a sweet gesture and Misto really had no quam in the rest of the Jellicles knowing how much Tugger cared.

"Go ahead" he said with a smile

"Thanks" said Tugger turning around and heading for the door. As soon as he got there Misto called out,

"Tug, wait". The bigger tom looked back expectantly and a few moments passed with neither one speaking. Eventually Misto carried on,

"Thank you…for…you know, everything"

Tugger smiled and nodded without speaking. It was enough for Misto to know that he didn't have the words to tell him how he felt. Tugger was good at that, he was only a master of shallow words that were used to pick up bimbos. He was useless at trying to express himself deeply but he compensated fully with his looks. The way he could convey a deep message with a simple glance was invaluable to Misto and the smaller tom felt privileged to be privy to such an intimate connection. Without any more words Tugger left the den leaving Misto laying there under his straps alone again with no one but his thoughts to keep him company. That, and the last few remnants of a need for catnip that were giving him a bit of a headache already.

* * *

Tugger hadn't really been expecting just how much of a blow stepping outside would be. At first he had only stuck his head out and looked around to see if anyone were there. When he saw no one he cautiously stepped out while keeping his wits about him. So far so good. As he started to feel a little less on edge he began to put one paw in front of the other and made his way towards his den. It was then – at the moment when he was right in the middle of the junkyard – that he heard a blood-curdling shriek that made his fur – or what was left of it – stand on end. In a flash he spun his head around to where the scream had come from and straight away he fixated on a horrified pair of kittens at the edge of the clearing.

"Tugger…" Etcetera and Electra said in unison before just Electra carried on, "what happened to you?"

Tugger's heart sank even lower than he expected when they didn't run up to him and throw themselves at him, instead they just remained where they were keeping well back like he had some horrible disease that they might catch. He knew how ridiculous he looked but he never thought the kittens would be so freaked out by his new appearance that they would actually keep their distance. With a sigh he tried to put them at ease,

"It's for Misto's sake, girls. I needed to prove to him that nothing else mattered but him"

The pair were not amused.

"But you looked so hot before. How could you do it?"

"Like I said, it was for Misto"

The pair looked at each other,

"But you looked so sexy, how is that not more important?"

Tugger smiled weakly,

"I might have agreed with you at one time but not anymore. As long as I have Misto I have everything, I don't need anything else"

The two still looked shocked. Without another word they left quickly to find a place to try and comprehend what Tugger was telling them. The previously-maned tom was left in peace to carry on with his break from being indoors and he took several deep breaths of fresh air to clear his thoughts.

When he opened his eyes he looked around to see Bomba looking at him with an amused smile from outside her den. With a roll of his eyes the big tom decided just to get her taunts over with and put on a lightly cheery voice to speak to her,

"What are you looking at?" he asked

"Did Jenny finally give you a befitting punishment?"

"No, I did this myself"

Bomba raised an eyebrow, "Yeah right"

"It's the truth"

"Why would you do that?"

"I needed to show Misto I loved him more than anything else. Well, I actually needed to show Bustopher so he wouldn't hit me again"

"Oh dear" chuckled Bomba, "So he knows about…me?"

"Yes" said Tugger with mock grimness

"I see. Well…thanks for taking the bullet"

"You owe me"

"Like hell I do, I'm carrying this kitten for you"

"Speaking of which" said Tugger now taking I her appearance, "You're getting bigger everyday. Can't be too much longer before you drop"

"Soon enough" she said as she rubbed her big belly, "It's getting really heavy"

"Are you feeling alright?"

"Well enough I suppose"

"Not painful?"

"Here and there but it's okay"

Tugger gave her a half-smile, "Better you than me"

"Piss off!" she said playfully receiving a small chuckle from Tugger.

"Listen, I'm gonna go back to my den for a bit. If anyone needs me I'm there"

"Alright, see ya" said the red queen before her kitten's father disappeared. Once he'd gone she kept looking at his doorway for a little while longer. For a few moments she felt a little numb as she didn't really know how to comprehend Tugger's response. She then felt worried that when she had the kitten it was going to have a difficult life since Tugger would be with Misto. Then she felt calmer, after all Tugger seemed to have made his peace with the situation and she was certainly looking forward to being a mother. Maybe things would work out alright.

Feeling a little kick from the inside she clutched her belly and smiled gently. She was getting to know this kitten quite well already and she felt so excited to be able to start being a real mum.

'_See you soon'_ she thought as she rubbed at her tummy.

* * *

Misto huffed with frustration as he lay tied down. He'd thought about telling Jenny he'd got the point now and he wouldn't run off but he knew she wouldn't respond to it. He was there until he could prove he was off the catnip and that was that. The annoying thing for Misto was that he knew the memory of the nice feeling catnip gave him was never going to go away so he'd never be completely cured. He did, however, think he was within the realms of being able to manage any small cravings that surfaced now so surely that was enough to let him up, right?

In any case he knew he couldn't do anything until Munk came and saw him so he resignedly lay his head back and let Jenny feed him. He was on the last can of cat food now and if the straps around him had shown him anything it was that he had put on a huge amount of weight. He was definitely fatter than he had been before he'd run away and he wasn't sure whether he liked it. He wasn't by any means chubby but since he wasn't moving much he was storing it all away and could definitely feel his waistline expanding. Mercifully he wasn't made to wonder too much about whether Tugger would find him attractive anymore, after all he was in no fit state of beauty at that moment in time so why should he judge him any less. Then again, would he stop loving him however he looked? Probably not anymore. Misto knew his Tugger wasn't the shallow cat he used to be and it was nice to be on a much higher level of spirituality with someone.

Still, even now Misto knew that what Tugger had done had never gone away and deep inside it still hurt to think that his mate – his true love – had slept with somebody else. The fact that it was Bomba made it hurt just a little bit more since she had tried to split them apart before but on the whole Misto couldn't – despite how hard he tried – make complete peace with what Tugger had done. He wanted to, he really wanted to but there was always something there that was blocking him and if it weren't for that tiny little wall between them Misto would gladly run back to Tugger – if he weren't tied down – and kiss him fiercely. It was all he wanted to do but even after all this time he just couldn't.

Misto sighed, he really did want to be close to Tugger again but it seemed that he was just a little bit too far away. If only he could find away to make that wall between them crumble he knew he could be happy again. But how?

As if his thought a few moments ago had summoned him, Munk stepped through the doorway and greeted Misto in his usual reserved warmness.

"Good morning, Misto. How are you today?"

Misto softened his expression from the deep thought he'd been in,

"Fine. You?"

"Very well. I was wondering how the cravings were coming along"

"Oh?"

"Yes. I was wondering if they'd subsided at all yet"

"As a matter of fact, yes they have. No thanks to these straps though"

Munk looked a little disheartened,

"We're sorry but you know why did it, don't you?"

"Was there nothing else you could think of?" asked Misto with only a little harshness in his voice.

"It seemed like the only way that would really work; but that's for you to tell us"

Misto sighed,

"Yeah, it has. It's not been comfortable and the moment you put them around me you stripped me of my dignity but yes they have been helpful in stopping me from giving in"

"Well, you gave away your dignity when you sneaked out of the junkyard, brought catnip back and got high in your pipe. Seeing you tear through the junk looking for an imaginary mouse seemed far more embarrassing than being strapped to a bed"

"I what?" asked Misto blushing a little.

"That's right. You were so sure you saw a mouse and you nearly tore me to pieces when I tried to get you to stop"

"Oh…" said Misto quietly and looking down, "…sorry"

"It's okay" said Munk as he walked closer, "at least you're on the mend now. Not only that, you certainly look healthier"

"You mean fat?" asked Misto with the same embarrassment making Munk chuckle.

"It's okay if we call you fat. You're still a cute little kitten in our eyes"

Misto looked at him strangely; he'd never heard Munk refer to anything as cute before. It was weird but kind of funny at the same time. In any case Misto decided to carry on,

"Do you think you could take these off now?" he asked motioning downwards with his head. Munk looked at him suspiciously and then sat down next to the bed.

"Are you sure you're ready?"

"Yes. I don't need it anymore and I can stop my self from needing to go and find it. I don't even know where to get some anyway"

"Well, you found some before"

"That was given to me and I kept it all along"

"Who gave it to you?"

"One of Tugger's friends"

"Of course…" said Munk as he rolled his eyes. There was a brief silence before he carried on, "How do I know you're not just telling me all this to let you up so you can run off again?"

"You just have to trust me." Misto flattened his ears a little and look away, "I know a promise from me is worth less than it used to but it's all I can give you. I promise you, Munk, that I won't ever take catnip again"

Munk looked at him cautiously before continuing,

"Promise on something that matters"

Misto thought for a second before he looked up,

"I promise on Bomba's kitten"

Munk just sat there bemused for a few moments before he furrowed his brow and responded to the odd comment,

"That's a strange thing for you to promise on"

"I guess it is"

"I can't help but wonder if you rather resent that kitten"

Misto let out a breath and replied gently,

"Despite what it represents it's still a pure, innocent new life that deserves all the love it can be given. It didn't ask to be conceived, it just was and I would never swear on a life so pure if I were being false"

Munk thought for a second. Those words certainly sounded insightful enough as to be expected from how he remembered Misto and it made him happy to think that he was returning to his old self. After a few more moments and without saying anything he got up and reached out to the bed. He fumbled for a few seconds before Misto felt the strap across his chest start to loosen and as it did he felt a smile creep across his face over the sense of freedom it gave him. Within a few minutes the bands of leather that had pulled him against the bed while he writhed beneath were off of him and he rubbed against his flattened fur to fluff it up again.

The tux took a few steps across the den to look in mirror that sat nearby and as he stared he ran his paws over his body. He did look better than before just like everyone was saying and to know that Munk trusted him again felt good. Tugger's morals were loose and he felt he could be completely free with him but Munk was different. Munk he needed to keep on the good side of and he felt it important to show him he was trustworthy. Turning around he smiled up at the silver tabby and went across to him. When he got to the bigger cat he put his arms around him and hugged him tightly whilst saying,

"Thank you, Munk. Thanks for everything"

Munk smiled an hugged him back,

"It's alright. Anything to keep things in order and everyone safe"

Misto snuggled against his warm chest fur and closed his eyes. He felt ever so safe with Munk and it felt nice to be so close to him.

"I wish Tugger could have a few of your 'protector' qualities"

"Ah, he's a good tom really…in a way"

"He's not like you though, you're different"

"Maybe you got the wrong brother" said Munk jokily as they parted.

What happened next was strange. Misto for some reason felt a very odd euphoria about him and he knew it was because of being so close to his protector. There was a strange sense of security that only Tugger had given him before back when everything had been alright. Right now he was receiving it from Munk and it made him feel so good inside. Without thinking and in a strange daze he placed his paws on Munk's shoulders, hoisted himself up and went to kiss him.

Munk, in his lightening fast style of reaction, quickly pulled away in surprise but it wasn't quite quick enough to avoid the smaller tom completely. For a split second Misto's lips brushed his and when Misto opened his eyes all he saw was the silver tabby leaning away from him while he tried to pull him closer.

"What are you doing, Misto?" asked Munk awkwardly.

Misto suddenly realised what he'd done and jumped away mortified. He turned his back and covered his face with his paws as an incredible sense of embarrassment washed over him and he groaned as he felt more stupid than he ever had done in his life. Munk just watched him in great surprise waiting for the smaller tom to pull himself together and when Misto didn't turn around he decided to try and make some sense of this.

"It's okay" he said trying not to sound stiff

Misto shook his head and didn't look back,

"No, it's not. I didn't mean to do that"

"I know you didn't. You're confused"

"I'm sorry, Munk! Please forgive me!"

"Shh, it's okay" said Munk as he went over to the younger tom, "You've been through a lot lately. It probably felt nice to be close to someone, didn't it?"

Misto nodded slowly, "I just got carried away. I needed the contact"

Munk tried to smile but the strangeness of the situation prevented him from doing so.

"Go and see Tugger, it's him you should be seeking contact from"

"I don't know if I can" said Misto meekly and finally turning around

"Do you love him?"

"Yes"

"Then he's the one. Just take it slowly"

Misto looked down in shame again,

"I'm sorry"

"Don't worry, I won't tell anyone"

"I feel so stupid"

"Just put it down to a brief lapse in judgement"

"Okay" said Misto meekly before turning away and going to the door. He really did feel stupid for trying to kiss Munk, how could he ever have thought that might make him feel better or make things any easier? Without hesitating he left the den to try and shake the awkward feeling he felt inside and with every step he took away from Munk he left the embarrassment behind – or at least part of it.

Munk just looked at the doorway where Misto had exited and took a deep breath before letting it out. He had no idea what on earth Misto had just tried to do but he knew what he himself was going to do now. Skimble must have kept the scotch around here somewhere; he may not have been a drinker but he could certainly use a stiff drink right now even if it was still the morning.

* * *

Tugger still hadn't made his peace with having no mane. He'd hidden himself away in his den for a while now and all he'd done was allow himself to wallow in self-pity. He felt like such a martyr at times but when he remembered that he'd done it all for Misto it didn't feel quite as bad. At this moment in time however he was feeling like he ought to be rewarded in some way for going through with such a courageous act but he was slowly becoming objected towards the idea. He just didn't care about anything but Misto anymore and as long as he came back then that was all that mattered.

One problem though: Misto hadn't actually come back to him yet. He'd had a good feeling that he might but there was no definitive moment when they'd gotten back together. It had to be coming though, right? Surely Misto wouldn't wait too much longer to make it happen.

As Tugger sat down he looked around the den and tried to remember some of the good times he'd had with Misto in there. As he thought he remembered times when they'd laughed and times when they'd held each other close as well as other times when they'd done a few things Tugger had certainly enjoyed. He missed those particularly yet it was the feeling of love he missed most of all. Hopefully it wouldn't be long before it came back.

When he heard a rustling outside he looked up to see Misto burst through the doorway in a bit of a fluster.

"Are you alright?" he asked concernedly as he got up. Misto stopped straight away and looked at him with a fairly blank expression on his face. It was as if he were trying to think quickly and was about to come out with something important but when silence remained Tugger relaxed a little more.

"I…thought I'd come and see you" said Misto eventually.

"Right…?" said Tugger raising an eyebrow since they'd been together for days.

"Yeah. I thought we could…you know…talk"

"Oh" said Tugger suddenly cottoning on to what Misto was trying to say, "Right then, well sure, let's talk."

Misto smiled meekly and tottered over to the bed where they usually slept together and motioned for Tugger to join him. The bigger tom placed himself down a little way from Misto and looked at him waiting for him to begin.

"So…I don't really know how to start" said Misto quietly, "this is really hard and I don't know how to get into it"

"May I?" asked Tugger having thought about what he would say when this moment came for weeks.

"Okay"

"I need you to know that I will always love you. You're the only thing in the world that matters to me and if you haven't noticed by now then I think I'm out of options," he said as he gestured to his missing mane. "Without you I can never be whole again and I need you in my life, Misto. I'll always do anything you ask of me, just name it"

Misto thought for a moment and then responded, "Like being faithful?"

That little stab at Tugger made him feel a little uncomfortable because he wasn't a nasty cat by nature. It didn't feel right to spite his mate and he could see it made Tugger feel low when he did.

"Sorry" said Misto quietly, "it's just that I don't think I can ever forget what you did. It'll always be there"

"I know, but I'm willing to spend the rest of my life making it up to you. I don't expect you to forget, I just need you to see past it"

"I know, and I'm trying but it's still fresh in a way. Maybe it's because Bomba's still pregnant but knowing that kitten will be yours and hers will always be that little nag that tells me you slept with her whilst you were mated to me"

Tugger sighed, "I'll always be sorry for that but what's done is done. I can't take back a kitten"

"I don't mean that. It's just that it's unavoidable"

"I know"

They were both silent again before Tugger spoke up,

"We can get through it though. I know we're stronger than this"

"Are you going to be able to manage having a kitten and have time for me?"

"Of course I will. There will always be time for you no matter what."

"But…the kitten…and Bomba…I…" Misto paused for a moment before he squeezed out the difficult words, "I can't help feeling I might get pushed aside eventually. A kitten is important and I wonder if maybe…I will eventually be ignored"

Tugger grabbed his paw in surprise and squeezed it tightly,

"Misto, look at me. You will never be second best. Not to anyone. I promise you will always be number one and that is on my life. I could never ignore you or push you aside, you're too amazing and I could never tire of you."

"Do you mean it?"

"Of course I do"

The two smiled at each other briefly before they carried on.

"So do you think you can come back to the den now? I've really missed you" asked Tugger hopefully. Misto patted his paw and looked down at it briefly.

"We'll see. I'm not sure if I'm there yet"

"When do you think you will be there?"

Misto sighed, "I don't know. I don't even know if I ever will"

"What are you saying?"

"Well, I just don't know if I'm ever going to feel right in here again?"

"Well, we can move" said Tugger as he became a little flustered over the words, "We can build a new den and star afresh!"

"It's not that. It's just coming back and living together…I don't know…"

"I thought you said you loved me!" said Tugger angrily not knowing of any other emotion to use that would be appropriate at that moment. Once again he'd been given hope and had it taken away and whereas before he had just felt upset he now felt as if enough was enough. He didn't deserve to be put on another emotional rollercoaster and it made him angry that he could see his life turning that way. It made Misto startle a little and the smaller tom took a moment to reply.

"I do love you! It's just a feeling"

"Then what are we supposed to do, Misto? Live apart for the rest of our lives?"

"No, of course not-"

"Then what? Do you want to come back?"

"I don't know"

"Would you just make up your mind?"

Misto started to get annoyed at Tugger's little outburst and responded in kind,

"Don't rush me! It was you that started off this whole mess so you can't expect me just to forget it all!"

"I didn't say that! I just want you back! I get what I did made you feel terrible but when you ran away for such a long time it tore me apart! Maybe I deserved it but in any case I was terrified for you! When you came back and then told me you still loved me I thought that if I could show you that all I want is you you'd see past all of the bad stuff. Now you're saying you don't want to come back? Stop playing with my emotions!"

That rubbed Misto completely the wrong way and he snapped back at the bigger tom,

"Your emotions? Don't talk to me about your emotions! You broke my heart when you made Bomba pregnant and it sent me over the edge! Don't you dare tell me that you're the victim here!"

"Well there's got to be some give and take, babe! You've got me wrapped around your little finger and it's not fair for you to toy with me!"

"Toy with you? You think I'm enjoying all of this? This has destroyed me! I'm just trying to put the pieces back together!"

"Well so am I! If you could just let me in-"

"I'm trying, Tugger! I'm trying to find a way to be close to you again but now that you've exploded you're making it really damn difficult!"

"Well, isn't that the pot calling the kettle black?"

Misto fumed a the bigger tom. He'd gone there to try and start making sense of things but in his eyes Tugger had not been in the same mindset. Now they were arguing and things were certainly not getting better.

"Is this how you want us to be from now on? At each other's throats?" shouted Misto

"Of course not! I just want us to be together again, is that too much to ask?"

"Think about exactly what it is you're asking! I can't just switch it on and off!"

"I'm not asking you to do that, I just want you to show me there's hope!"

"Well I don't know how!"

"Do you love me?"

"Of course"

"Then please come back to me! I need you!"

Misto paused for a moment and then spoke in a quieter voice but with the same frustration,

"You know, I thought what we had was like what cats dream of. I thought we were living in a perfect world were nothing could go wrong because we loved each other so much. I thought our lives would be like in the stories but I guess not…"

"Everlasting, Misto! Love isn't that easy. Love isn't perfect by any means but that's what makes it so wonderful. No matter what comes your way it's the love that gets you through and in the end when you have nothing else left you still have each other. You can't think of love as simple and like in a story, babe! It's nowhere near as easy as that because love is no fairytale. It's complicated and sometimes it's harsh but in the end it's what keeps you alive. Don't we have that?"

The two stood there staring at each other feeling less angry with one another now. What Tugger said struck a chord inside Misto and it made him stop to think. 'Love is no fairytale', wasn't that the truth. Misto's perceptions of love had been more than challenged during this whole ordeal and to see that Tugger knew something about love that he didn't made him stop to wonder if maybe Tugger felt a deeper connection with him than he did with Tugger. Could it be that Tugger loved him more than he loved Tugger and he hadn't noticed? Or did they love each other the same and he had forgotten it somewhere along the way? It was unutterably profound and Misto couldn't think of any words to continue. He just stood there with a look of intrigue and watched as Tugger went to continue their argument.

It was just as he was about to speak when they were interrupted by a few muffled cries of panic from outside and then terrified screaming. The two turned towards the doorway and listened carefully to try and figure out what was going on. It seemed that chaos had ensued all of a sudden having appeared out of the blue and fear was struck into both of the tom's hearts when out of the din they heard one very distinct shriek,

"Pollicles!"

**Uh oh! Pollicles are in the junkyard! Dogs and cats do not mix! Panic!**

**Sincerely well done for getting through that. I know it was long and I'm sorry for not making it shorter. I just couldn't get around it, this one had to be long to make the story progress properly. I will endeavour to make the next ones more manageable.**

**Thanks for reading, please review. x**


	16. The Steady Stream

**What lovely reviews. Thank you all. It's nice to know the long chapters aren't arduous. I like writing long ones because you can say so much more about what's going on. As such, here's another over-eleven-thousand-worder! In any case I'm glad to hear you're enjoying this story.**

**CrazyIndigoChild – Your review made my day! I was in class when I read it and I had to try and hide the big smile that spread across my face. As for the stuff you told me not to do though…well, read on…**

**WARNING: Bad language and upsetting content (at least I hope I've written it well enough to be upsetting. Lol).**

**Love Is No Fairytale**

**Chapter 16**

**The Steady Stream**

The very mention of the word was to strike a great many emotions into the heart of a cat. Depending on the situation at hand it could result in a general wariness mixed with a snooty sort of self-importance that elevates that cat far above the lowliness of such a dumb creature – at least in the cat's mind. At other times it could bore a cat to distraction if the word suggests in any way some kind of forced interaction. The mentioning this time though was not quite as straightforward or unimportant as it wasn't so much mentioned as screamed in terror. To hear the word with such a weight of fear and urgency was enough to tell any cat that things were about to become very dangerous, very quickly.

Misto and Tugger upon hearing the screams start to radiate through the walls of their den and the distinctive sound of raucous, idiotic barking quickly drained them of their frustration with one another and filled them with two very distinctive feelings of their own. Needless to say both were filled with fear but it was far deeper and much more profound in Misto than it was in Tugger. The bigger tom stood there and looked at his mate worriedly as he saw the smaller tux start to panic and breathe quickly over the prospect of being attacked by Pollicles. He had never liked the big, stupid beasts – largely due to his size – and they made him very afraid whenever they were near. Tugger was not quite as terrified; definitely scared but at that moment more worried about Misto as he kept looking at him try to keep a hold on his fear. Tugger knew he had to get Misto to think straight if he was going to keep him safe so he quickly dashed over to him and gripped his head firmly in his paws making him look him in the eye. Without stopping to think properly Tugger spoke firmly and directly to the tux,

"Stay here, okay? Keep your head down and don't come out. Just keep safe."

The worried little tux gripped Tugger's arms as he wet to pull away and made him look back at him as he turned. Misto begged with his eyes as he looked up at Tugger and all of the anger he had held within him a moment ago was completely gone now.

"Please don't leave me!" said Misto both quietly and desperately and making Tugger feel awful for having to step out for a moment and see what was going on. Feeling as if time was of the essence he stooped down to Misto's level and brought their faces close together so they were looking into each other's eyes again.

"I'm just gonna see what's happening. I won't be long, okay?"

"But I don't like Pollicles, Tugger! You know that! What if they find me?"

"They won't if you stay here and keep quiet. Please, Misto, I have to help"

"But I'm scared, Tug" whimpered Misto quietly as he continued to plead with his eyes.

"I know, babe," said Tugger as he tried his hardest not to let his heart break over the look on Misto's face, "but I need you to be strong, okay? There might be someone that needs help and we can't just leave them. I love you; you know that, right? Now, just stay safe"

The two looked at each other for a moment longer both knowing they wanted to kiss just for the purpose of reassurance. As the split seconds passed the likelihood of that happening grew less and less and in the end Tugger just hugged Misto to his chest tightly whilst they enjoyed each other's comfort for only a moment. With that Tugger turned and jumped out of the den leaving Misto alone and scared hoping to the everlasting cat that the apparently invading Pollicles wouldn't sniff him out. Misto hated Pollicles with a passion but moreover he was terrified of them. He was sure they could easily kill him with a single blow and now that he had no magic he was doubly powerless to defend himself. Before Misto would have had untold advantage over any Pollicle since he could disappear in a flash. Now he was essentially defenceless and Tugger knew that couldn't have sat well inside the little tux.

Misto - wasting no time at all - dashed back across to the bed and buried himself in his blankets and then listened intently for any sign of what was going on outside. To him it sounded like a lot of frantic shouting and barking and the terrible din made him feel all the more afraid. He wished Tugger was there to comfort him, but it was okay though. He said he'd be back in a moment, right?

* * *

Tugger jumped out of the den and stood imposingly on the junk just outside. It took only a few seconds to see cats scattering everywhere and a large pack of menacing Pollicles charge into the centre of the junkyard behind them. Across from him he could see Jenny belting as fast as she could herding as many kittens as possible off over the junk and away from the terrible mess that was developing so quickly in the clearing. On the other side he could see many of the others including Jemima and Victoria paw-in-paw running for safety wherever that might have been and looking terribly scared. For a brief moment as he looked their way he caught Jemima's eyes and in them he could see the same fear he'd seen in Misto. Everything was already awful and it had only just started.

Hearing a great clatter he flicked his eyes back across and saw his brother along with Alonzo jump down into the path of the Pollicles as they ran into the junkyard and prepare themselves for a brutal fight. In a flash he threw himself down from the junk and charged over to them arriving just in time for the Pollicles to be right in front of them all.

With a fierce, furious glare Munk squared up to the biggest of them and stared it down as best he could. At that moment it was between him and that one beast with the rest of the members of the respective groups –the Jellicles being joined by the remaining toms – waiting for the mayhem to begin.

Warily, Munk took a step forward as did the Pollicle and together they sized each other up looking for any way to catch the other at a disadvantage. He'd never admit it but in his heart Munk was terrified. Despite it being his job to protect the whole tribe the Pollicle he glared at was huge and could easily kill him if it caught him at the right moment. Still, he stared at the creature and hissed furiously whilst trying to look as powerful as he possibly could. The air was thick with the most incredible tension and everyone was waiting for the first speck of action before the chaos ensued. A second or two later they were not disappointed.

In a flash Munk darted forward with his claws bared and arms flailing as he went to tear at the Pollicle. Within a split second he was on top of it and tearing away and with that the creature bit back at him and clawed in kind. As if it were a starting pistol their fight prompted the rest of the Pollicles to jump forward and after a few seconds more they were engaged with the Jellicles.

Tugger barely knew what had hit him when he felt the mass of another of the Pollicles fly at him. In an instant it knocked him to the ground and was on top of him trying to rip him apart. Tugger threw his claws up and connected with the Pollicle receiving a yelp in return and in the brief moment before they carried on he picked himself up and adopted a threatening posture. Once again the Pollicle came at him but this time Tugger was ready. He jumped at just the right moment and managed to get a good firing line for the beast's neck. Straight away he sunk his teeth into it and started shaking his head from side to side. In return he felt claws and teeth strike at him and pain soon started radiating from the spots where the creature caught him.

As they continued to fight Tugger caught glimpses of what was going on nearby. Next to him fought Mungojerrie with a Pollicle of a similar size to his and the cockney tom seemed to be doing fairly well. That was until it caught him at a moment when his guard was down and sent him flying against the junk at the edge of the clearing. Tugger flinched as he saw his friend land but he was up again in an instant and ready to keep fighting.

Away from Mungo was Plato and next to him was Coricopat as well as Tantomile surprisingly. It seemed they really did do absolutely everything in sync – or nearly enough.

The sound was terrible and the barking, shouting, hissing and ripping of claws and teeth was enough to strike fear into anyone. All the while Tugger thought about Misto and hoped he was keeping safe. With one final blow he managed to throw the Pollicle he was fighting down and before he could hit it again it limped away whimpering. In the brief, vacant moment he looked around and could see whoever was fighting was moving away. It was by no means getting any calmer though and Tugger knew he had to get Misto away from the clearing. As if Munk had read his thoughts the silver tabby shouted out as he continued to fight,

"There's too many! Everyone run!"

Tugger was struck with confusion for a moment and he only managed to shout back one name,

"Misto!"

Munk looked across to him and gave a fierce look.

"Grab him! Get him away! I'll lead them this way"

With that a few of the other toms ran off in the opposite direction to where Tugger and Misto's den was and that gave Tugger the split second he needed to turn and run for it.

When he burst in he quickly scanned back and forth whilst shouting,

"Misto! Misto where are you?"

From underneath the blankets on the bed Misto tentatively peeked out and spoke meekly,

"Are they gone?"

Tugger ran across and grabbed him, pulled him out and yanked him towards the door. He could feel Misto shaking in his grip and he hated that this was happening to him on top of everything else. As they left the den Tugger shouted at him,

"We've got to go! We've got to run now!"

"What do you mean?" asked Misto frantically as he was pulled.

Tugger didn't respond, he simply pulled Misto over the top of the junk and took off running with the smaller tom in tow. As they went they heard the sounds of the Pollicles radiate around the junkyard and for a moment it seemed like they were coming from every direction. Tugger just kept running, there was absolutely no time to lose and all he cared about at that moment was keeping Misto from harm.

Misto was becoming more frightened by the second and now that he could hear the chaos more clearly and was out in the open where he could be caught he started to trip and stumble as his legs shook nervously. It made Tugger falter a little too and feeling his mate fall back he looked around quickly, grabbed him and darted into a small indent in the junk. As they stood there Tugger gripped Misto's arms and spoke to him firmly and directly,

"Misto! It's gonna be okay but you have to try and concentrate, okay? We've got to get you away from here"

Misto instantly started to tear up and where before he had managed to keep hold of his composure it now started to slip from his grip. Tugger saw him start to go to pieces and it hurt to see the one he loved so scared.

"They're gonna catch me, Tug! They're gonna catch me and tear me to shreds!"

"Misto, listen! They won't, I promise they won't!"

"They will! They're coming and they're gonna find me!"

Tugger didn't know what to do. Everything was happening so fast and he was under so much pressure couldn't think straight. In the madness of it all he jumped to the only thing he could think of. He grabbed Misto even tighter and forced their lips together in a fierce kiss making the smaller tom open his eyes wide in surprise. Straight away Misto felt a rush flow through him starting at his lips and then exploding throughout his body. It was familiar but unfamiliar at the same time and while it was like he had felt it before it also felt new. In any case it felt amazing and for the moment that the kiss lasted he suddenly felt incredibly powerful. A second later Tugger pulled away and rested his forehead against his lover's while panting deeply. The tux just looked back at him completely still and wondering what had just happened. That kiss was wonderful, it made him feel so great and it felt almost as if his magic had come back. The small tom looked down at his paws expectantly and tried to feel anything new inside him but was distracted when Tugger spoke to him from his heart.

"I know you're scared, I am too. I promise I'll keep you safe though because I love you, babe. I love you far too much to let anything happen"

Misto wasn't actually afraid at that moment. It was strange since he knew he ought to be but he simply wasn't. Reaching out he spoke quickly,

"Wait, Tug!"

Tugger looked back as he tried to pull away and Misto continued,

"Kiss me again!"

"Now? We have to go!"

"Do it!"

No, Misto! Come on!"

With that Tugger grabbed Misto's paw once more and pulled him out of the dent in the junk. As they ran Misto heard the sounds of the Pollicles around him again and started to grow afraid. Not as afraid as before though since there was now a tingling in his paw were Tugger gripped it and as he was led he looked at it and puzzled over what was happening. There was definitely something growing inside him; it was like a power that was brewing and trying to get out and it seemed as if that kiss was what had started it. If only he could kiss Tugger again, maybe it would help. In any case Misto knew it wasn't the time or the place and he did his best to concentrate on running. The sounds of the Pollicles were getting closer now and he could feel Tugger starting to panic as he ran ahead of him.

* * *

Having darted off on her own Bomba suddenly felt very vulnerable and wished she had stayed with somebody else. With her last ounce of strength she reached out her arms and supported herself against the junk at the side of the trail upon which she was running. She was utterly spent and she knew she couldn't run anymore. The kitten inside her was weighing her down terribly and as she stood there she panted heavily as she tried to catch her breath. The sounds of the invading Pollicles echoed from a multitude of different directions and all she could assume was that they were getting nearer. As the thought crossed her mind she felt tears build behind her eyes and came to realise that if she was caught then there was barely anything she could do to save herself. In her heart though it felt more than that; there was someone else that was worth far more than her at that moment and that was the defenceless, unborn kitten in her womb. The Pollicles wouldn't take pity on her for that, they'd just see her for what she was – a cat – and react like any normal Pollicle would. Bomba knew she was in danger and for the first time in her life she actually felt like she couldn't take care of herself. It scared her right down to her core and as she stood there she grabbed desperately for any idea that might get her out of the mess she was in.

As the seconds ticked on nothing came and all she could do was force herself to carry on. Maybe if she tried she could get put of the junkyard and away to somewhere safe for a while – at least until the Pollicles were gone. That was a tall order right at that moment though, a very tall order.

* * *

"Down this way! Quickly!"

"Tug, where are we going?"

"Anywhere! We have to get away!"

The sounds of barking and the pattering of paws behind them were getting louder now and Misto and Tugger knew they were being followed for sure. It panicked them more than they knew and in the mayhem Tugger pulled Misto down every other trial he could find – anything to get his mate away from the danger. Unfortunately for him the danger was following them and Tugger knew he was running out of options. Still, he pulled on Misto's paw and continued to drag him along behind him. Every now and then he felt a pull when Misto stumbled or tripped and the bigger tom had to use every ounce of strength within him not to become upset over the prospect of Misto not being strong enough to survive if the worst came to the worst.

Rounding another corner Tugger grabbed Misto around the ribs and hoisted him up into an old washing machine and then jumped in there himself. Together they stood holding each other for a moment as they listened to the sound of the chaos that was going on in the junkyard and as soon as he caught his breath Tugger spoke to Misto again.

"This isn't working, we're gonna have to hide!"

"Tug, kiss me!" begged Misto having not forgotten the feeling inside that the last kiss had given him.

"For crying out loud, Misto! Now is not the time!"

"Tugger, just do it!"

"Not now! I have to try and think of somewhere for us to hide so would you please stop asking me to kiss you and help me?"

Misto didn't care about anything else at that moment, he wanted another kiss and by the Everlasting Cat he was going to get one.

"Tugger!" shouted Misto making the bigger tom looked down at him in a flurry. Straight away Misto grabbed his head and kissed him with the same ferocity Tugger had kissed him with. It was Tugger's turn to be surprised this time and as such he looked on in shock as his mate kissed him passionately.

A few seconds later Misto pushed himself back and stood there looking very uneasy. Tugger watched as Misto shuddered a few times and then marvelled at sight of sparkling which was emitted very gently around Misto's paws. The tux just looked down at them and looked awestruck as he felt the tingling within him grow to a raging fire and as he rubbed his fingers together he felt something he knew very well accumulate there. It was the unmistakeable warmth and power of magic and it was what Misto had been missing for so long now. It was coming back and it felt absolutely wonderful, so wonderful in fact that the happiness that Misto felt was unlike anything he had ever experienced before. It confused him though, the feeling had only come about when he and Tugger had kissed. What did that mean? It was surely the kissing that set it off but what were the implications therein?

Once again there was no time to think for too long as Tugger grabbed him again and shook him out of his euphoric daze.

"Misto! Please stay with me for now! I need you to concentrate!"

Misto responded dreamily, "But…my magic…I think it's coming back…kiss me again!"

Tugger leant away as his mate tried to smooch him once more and took the initiative to shake him violently for a split second. That seemed to work and Misto stood there in Tugger's paws looking very befuddled at the sudden rough treatment.

"Misto! Pay some fucking attention, alright? We are not at all safe and I need to find somewhere to hide you! Please just concentrate for one minute and help me to think of somewhere to stash you!"

Misto heard every word and the urgency in Tugger's pleas let him know that what he was talking about was more important at that point.

"Okay…" breathed Misto prompting Tugger to lessen his grip slightly. The sounds of the Pollicles had grown no quieter and it suddenly struck Misto that maybe if his magic was coming back then he could defend himself. As Tugger placed his paws to his head and racked his brain Misto looked back at his paws and relished the tingle within.

'_Maybe if I just try it…' _thought Misto as he rubbed his paws together and reached them out in front of him towards the trail they had just been on. Biting his lip in anticipation he focused his mind on the task at hand and tried to direct any power he had within down his arms and into his paws.

A second or two later the tingling grew into almost a sting and with a sharp breath Misto let go whatever it was that he had built up.

Unfortunately all that came out were a few sparks which lit up the interior of the washing machine and then fizzled away into nothing as soon as they came out. It was enough to show Misto he was on the right track though and he beamed with joy knowing that he was turning back into the Magical Mister Mistoffelees. He had wished for this so much in the previous weeks and he had almost resigned to it never coming back. It was still a long way off but it was unmistakeably there and what's more he knew what was putting it there.

Looking hungrily back at Tugger he felt the need to kiss him grow strong again but he knew the bigger tom would probably throw a fit if he tried to snog him for a third time. As a matter of fact it looked like Tugger was growing more frantic by the second having no luck in thinking of somewhere and when he caught Misto's eyes the smaller tom could see there was a terrible feeling of terror behind them. Tugger cared for him so dearly and he was probably thinking of what would happen if he got caught. Misto knew Tugger would lay his life down for him and to see him doing all he could to prevent him from harm reaffirmed in Misto that he was loved beyond all meaning.

"Tugger" said Misto having had a quick thought. It made Tugger look at him directly with a fearful demeanour about him and Misto wanted nothing more than to put him at ease. Hopefully his idea would do that. "There's that trail at the other side of the junkyard that leads out onto the street. If we could get there then maybe we could get out"

Tugger looked down at Misto with an expression as if Misto had just told him the meaning of life. It then all came crashing down when he thought of one fundamental flaw.

"But that would mean going across the clearing again"

"I know" said Misto in a less confident voice, "but it would probably be our best bet. If they don't see us then they'd never think to follow us there"

"I don't know, Misto…"

"Tugger, come on! You said you wanted help so here it is! If we go then we've got to go now!"

Tugger looked at Misto awkwardly for a moment as he weighed up the risk in his head. They would be risking their lives going back there only on the hope that the clearing might be empty. If there were Pollicles still there then they'd surely kill both he and Misto and that was not the fate he had in mind for his mate. It was a brilliant idea though since that trail was so secluded they'd probably never be followed.

Going against his better judgement Tugger huffed in deep frustration and simply said, "Fine! Come on!" as he dragged Misto out of the washing machine and started running back in the direction from which they'd come. This was stupidly dangerous but they were out of ideas now.

Whatever happened though, Tugger was not going to let them hurt Misto. His tux was too precious to fall into the jaws of the Pollicles and he would fight to the death before he let them hurt him.

* * *

Bomba had to stop again. She was simply in no state to outrun anything at that time and it made her distraught to think that she was going to be found. As she stood there trying to catch her breath she was further constricted by a huge bubble of emotion that grew inside her and she had to fight to stop herself from breaking down right there. Running was just not working for her and having not seen anyone for a while she felt even more alone in her panic. Around her she could hear the sounds of barking, cats screaming and fighting but she couldn't tell who was winning or whether things were getting any better.

Despite knowing she shouldn't have felt it she desperately wished Tugger was there to keep her safe. One the one paw she hated wanting him with her and on the other she knew she wasn't the most important cat in his life anymore but above it all she knew she wanted him to protect her. They'd had a lot of history together and even though most of it was bad she wished he could have been there to keep her and their kitten from harm. She knew she didn't love him but she still felt she needed him and in her distress a few questionable thoughts crossed her mind that if she were in a stable state she would have known were wrong. Why did Misto have to be the one Tugger chose? Why had she never been good enough for him even now that they were having a kitten together? What was it about her that made her so unacceptable to the big, stupid tom and made him treat her like dirt? Above all, why was he in love with someone that wasn't her?

Shaking her head in an attempt to clear the disruptive thoughts she tried to think of some other way that she could spare herself from being found by the Pollicles. She could smell them now and it only made her panic more as she tried to think of some way out.

Then it dawned on her; suddenly she felt she had stumbled across something she had forgotten long ago and that in this time of terrible fear it was her saving grace. There was a trail on the other side of the junkyard that could lead her out of there. It was so well hidden that no Pollicle would ever think to follow her and if she could get to it she could surely make a break for safety. That meant getting back cross the clearing though and she didn't know the location of any of the Pollicles. What if they were waiting for the Jellicles to come back? They'd kill her in an instant since there was no chance she could fight them off.

As she stood there she heard an awful sound come within earshot and flicked her head back in the direction from which she'd come with her eyes wide and her heart beating out of her chest. It was the sound of paws making contact with the ground and the distinctive huffing and puffing of some creature panting as it ran. Something was right behind her and she hadn't heard it coming in the least bit. Now it was right on top of her and in a moment it would turn the corner and find her. In her panic she looked around quickly and threw herself at an old refrigerator when she saw it. The nasty, old contraption was long past any state of repair and as it lay on its side it barely provided a suitable hiding place. Nonetheless, Bomba was desperate and in a flash hid herself behind it hoping that whatever was coming wouldn't find her. She made sure to stifle her rapid breathing and keep as quiet as possible as the heavy footfalls grew closer. Soon the red queen stared to feel tiny vibrations in the ground and as whatever it was approached she wrapped her paws around her mouth so as not to make any sound whatsoever. That was easier said than done since as the fear started to conquer her completely she began to shake while she sat in her secluded spot praying that she'd be passed by.

A few moments later her worst fears were proven true when the biggest Pollicle that had fought with Munk right at the start rounded the corner and began padding its way along the trail she had been on. Bomba bit her lip hard as she heard the monster come closer and closer to her position and screwed her eyes shut as she waited for whatever was going to happen to just happen.

The Pollicle in question was really quite enormous and panted hard with its teeth bared as it ran around the junkyard looking for any sign of a feline for it to chase and ultimately destroy. The stupid beast padded along right up to where Bomba had just been and then stopped dead when it caught the scent of the red queen in the air. Bomba's eyes opened even wider when she suddenly heard silence and thought for a moment that it was all over for her. She felt she had been found and that it was only a matter of time now until she was dragged out and savaged right there on the ground. Tears began to stream down her face as she waited for any sign of being uncovered and used all her strength to stop herself from crying out loud.

The Pollicle swayed its head from side to side in search of the source of the feline aroma and when it thought it had discovered it the beast turned itself and moved slowly towards the junk, all the while panting heavily. The sound was almost deafening for Bomba since in her mind it was the sound of impending death and it only made her feel more frightened. The Pollicle took a few steps more and as soon as it had raised itself over the junk it stopped just inches from where Bomba cowered. There it took another long moment to sniff the air while panting heavily and trying to deduce whether or not its senses were telling the truth. It smelt so much like there was a cat there and it drove the creature wild with anticipation.

Bomba continued to shake in fear and begged silently that the Pollicle would go away. She didn't want to die, she needed to live for her kitten. She couldn't go out now, it just wouldn't be right!

The huge Pollicle was within seconds of moving itself further into the junk and discovering Bomba when mercifully a loud clattering and a huge amount of barking and yowling emanated from another part of the junkyard. The Pollicle stopped and looked away from where Bomba was for a second in confusion and then took off back down the trail. For a moment Bomba couldn't believe it, she had been so sure that she was about to be found and when she realised she had been spared she finally broke down in tears. She had come to the brink of death and then come back from it; it was too much for her to bear and she had a difficult time in trying to contain the sobs that forced themselves out of her.

She stayed there for a few minutes more as she let the previous moments' fear stream out of her. When she managed to regain a little composure she forced herself up and took of running as fast as she could once again. That had been too close for her and there was simply no time to lose. She had to get out of there now.

* * *

Tugger was belting along now with Misto's paw in his. There was nothing more important in his mind than keeping him safe now and it seemed both crazy and brilliant that he was heading back to the place they had just run from. As they got closer the sound of the mayhem once again appeared to come from all angles and Tugger prayed that the clearing would be clear for them to pass through.

As he ran he looked back at Misto who ran along with him with that strange, inquisitive look on his face. He knew Misto was thinking only about kissing him again and for a brief moment he wondered if he'd gone completely crazy. After all, he'd been wanting to kiss Misto again for weeks and now he was refusing it. It simply did not seem fair that the time Misto wanted to kiss was now and that if they did they'd probably be caught because of it. Tugger felt there was something incredibly wrong with universe because of that and as he ran along he suddenly found himself at the very edge of the clearing.

Screaming to a stop he caught Misto as he ran into him and bounced back and then hugged him closely as he looked around frantically. Very quietly he made his way over the junk and looked down into the clearing where tribe life was centred. It was a total wreck now that the Pollicles had been through it although thankfully they themselves didn't seem to be around. Tugger almost breathed a sigh of relief when he saw nothing moving but knew these things could be too good to be true.

Very carefully he made his way down with Misto still clinging onto him and together they silently climbed down to the ground. When everything seemed clear they looked at each other and relaxed slightly when they felt that they were within moments of being safe again. All they had to do now was find the trail and get out of there for a while. Things would be okay again soon but for now they knew they had to be anywhere but there.

That being said, Tugger started to regain some of his breath and as he looked at Misto he felt an incredible need to be close to him at that moment. He was scared - he knew that – and he knew Misto was scared too. That tux had been ever so brave though having kept strong for Tugger as they tried to find safety. He had so very nearly gone to pieces from his fear of Pollicles but he seemed to have plucked some courage out of nowhere. Tugger felt so proud of him and there was nothing more he wanted to do than kiss him again.

Misto barely had time to realise what was happening when Tugger grabbed him and pulled him up to his lips. The fact that it wasn't him asking for a kiss made it all the more special and this time when their lips met the feeling was a thousand times more magical than it had been before. As it went on Misto's fur started to sparkle and glow and when they stood back from each other Tugger marvelled at the sight before him.

"Misto! What's happening?" breathed Tugger as he looked at his mate. Misto just looked back with an awestruck, goofy smile and spoke with a reserved kind of glee.

"I don't know but it feels so good!"

"Is it your magic?"

Misto nodded, "I think so. I think it's coming back!"

"But now?"

"I think it was the kissing…I think…maybe you and I kissing was what…I don't know…"

"I don't understand!" said Tugger with some of the panic returning

"Nor do I!" chuckled Misto as he looked back at Tugger, "But I don't care! Just kiss me again!"

Tugger didn't refuse this time. He stepped over to Misto and pulled him into a powerful embrace. As he pulled Misto's face close to his he stopped just as they were about to meet. In a soft, passionate voice he simple said,

"I love you, Misto"

"I love you too" replied the smaller tom and closed the gap between them feeling his heart leap as they connected. Misto wrapped his arms around Tugger's neck as they pressed themselves against each other and he hung on tightly as he felt the one he loved leant against him. It was wonderful to have him close once more and even though he knew it was probably the situation that they were in that was making him act like this he didn't care. Right now he loved Tugger and Tugger loved him and there was nothing else more important than that.

That was all until they heard the distinctive sound of running in their direction and pulled apart quickly with the feeling of fear return to them in an instant. Both looked away from each other towards where it was coming from and Misto stepped closer to Tugger again when he felt afraid whilst grabbing on tightly to feel safer. There was no time to hide since it was so close and Misto had no idea what to do. Tugger felt the same and they simply looked on in fear as they waited for the angry Pollicle to happen upon them.

The flash of red the burst over the junk a few seconds later made them both flinch and it took them a few moments to realise it was Bomba who stared back at them with an identical expression.

"What are you two still doing here?" she asked frantically

"We're getting out of here. We thought you were a Pollicle!" said Tugger feeling a wave of relief wash over him.

"Do I look like one of those stupid bastards?" Bomba asked angrily

Tugger thought about coming back at her with some cheap comment but decided now was not the time.

"Are there any nearby?" he asked

"I think some are following me! We should be quick!"

"Okay, over there!" said Tugger as he ran past the red queen over to the other side of the clearing. When he got there he stopped and looked back making eye contact with Misto. The tux took a step forward and then looked at Bomba. Even though this was a critical situation being near her at that moment brought back all of the feelings he still felt towards her. She was still the queen that had slept with his mate and he still didn't know how to handle that.

Quickly looking away without saying anything he rushed over to Tugger and took his outstretched paw. Bomba quickly followed – or as quick as her gestating kitten would allow – and took his other paw as he helped her up onto the junk. The trio nearly made it to the top when another fearful sound made them stop and look back. There – where they had been standing only a few seconds ago – were two smug looking Pollicles with a look about them that suggested they were ready for the chase. The three cats at the top of the junk felt so incredibly scared and knew there was only one thing to do.

"Run!" shouted Tugger as he hoisted the other two up and pushed them down the other side of the junk mound. As if it were the starting pistol the Pollicles took off towards them and as the three desperate Jellicles started running down the trail behind the junk so did they hear the clambering of Pollicle paws on the junk behind them accompanied with fervent, angry barking.

They rounded corners and ducked and jumped around junk strewn everywhere. Clearly no one had been along this way in a while and it made it hard for each of them – especially Bomba – to navigate their way around. Several times Bomba stumbled and nearly fell down when her added weight threw her off but Tugger was beside her to catch her as Misto ran ahead. It made Bomba feel safe to have her kitten's father next to her and it almost made her happy that he was actually taking his responsibility for its safety seriously. Despite knowing there was very real danger behind her she let the thought cross her mind that once all of this was over Tugger would be there for her. It was wonderful to know their kitten would grow up with both of them in its life even if they weren't together.

That thought was pushed roughly aside when she stumbled again and this time she fell straight to the ground. Tugger ran a few paces forward before he knew what had happened and ground to a halt with horror on his face as he looked back to see her lying in the path of the charging Pollicles. Without thinking he ran back and reached to pull her up. Misto – having heard the thud behind him – looked back and was similarly horror-stricken when he saw them no longer running. He too stopped dead and called out to Tugger who he was suddenly very scared for,

"Tugger! Come on! They're coming!"

The bigger tom looked back at his mate with a desperate look in his eyes and simply shouted,

"Keep going! I've got to help, Bomba!"

Misto watched as the Pollicles barrelled down the trail behind them with the hunger in their eyes becoming visible as they got closer and his fur began to puff up as he felt the danger get nearer and nearer.

Tugger wasted no time in dragging Bomba back to her feet and when the Pollicles were only a few metres behind he started yanking hard in the opposite direction. As they ran a very ominous thought popped into Tugger's head: the Pollicles had followed them down the trail which was meant to hide them as they got out. They'd found them now so what was the chance they'd stop being chased when they got out of the yard?

Up ahead Tugger could see a fork in the trail and he saw Misto slow down as he quickly looked back and forth between the divergences. The tux had absolutely no idea which was the right way and as he tried to figure it out he became even more panicked. When he arrived at the split he stopped cold and looked back at Tugger and Bomba who ran up to him shortly after. As they stood there looking at each other fearfully they could hear the Pollicles nearing and it wasn't long before they all turned to see the two beasts stopped just a few feet away ready to jump on them. In their eyes the three could see the stupid, Pollicle hunger for cat and it made them all feel hopeless.

For Tugger the situation was twice as awful as behind him stood both his mate and the mother of his kitten. How could he possibly allow those Pollicles to get at the ones that were most important to him in the world?

With a deep breath and a desperate scrape for courage Tugger stiffly stepped forward and placed himself firmly in front of the two cats he knew in his heart he had to protect. Inside he was terrified but on the outside he spat rage and did his absolute best to stare down the dogs. Misto and Bomba watched as he puffed himself up and hissed ferociously at them in an attempt to scare them. It made Misto felt giddy for a moment when he thought about both of them ripping Tugger apart and he gasped sharply when he found he had stopped breathing momentarily.

"Tugger!" he breathed desperately with tears starting to form in his eyes, "What are you doing?"

The big tom could hear the fright in his mate's voice and it cut him deeply to know he was so afraid.

"It's alright, babe. Take Bomba and keep running, I'll hold them off for as long as I can"

"But they'll kill you, Tug!"

Tugger feigned a chuckle, "Let them try!"

It wasn't at all funny to Misto and at the words he tried to jump forward and grab his mate. As soon as he went for him Bomba grabbed him and held him back despite his desperate protests. As she held him in her arms Misto looked up at her and didn't know what to think. What was going on? He needed to pull his mate away or he'd be killed.

"Misto, come on!" she pleaded as she tried to pull him off down the right side of the fork in the trail.

"No! We can't leave him alone!"

Tugger breathed heavily and continued to glare at the Pollicles,

"I'll be fine, babe! Get going!"

"But…" Misto squeaked

"Just do it! I'll see you in a while once I deal with these two!"

Misto shook his head in disbelief and barely realised when Bomba began to drag him away. As soon as they were gone Tugger summoned all his strength and began to size up the dogs that stared back at him menacingly. With all his strength he mimicked their expressions and prepared himself for the attack. Without his mane he only looked half as threatening and only served to make the Pollicles feel more confident.

Enough was enough; Tugger flew at the Pollicle on the right when it seemed to be slightly off guard and instantly positioned himself on its back. There he began to swipe and bite and elicited loud growls of protest from the beast below. It was then that the other Pollicle bit at him and caught Tugger's arm as he went to hit again. The other Pollicle pulled him off onto the ground but as soon as Tugger hit it he pushed himself back up and swiped the dog across the face with his claws. It staggered away for a moment which gave Tugger just enough time to focus on the other one he had been biting a second ago. Reaching himself out he sunk his teeth into the Pollicle's face and his claws into its cheeks as he shook back and forth. The Pollicle yelped in response and swiped at Tugger's body to try and push him away but the previously-maned tom was too quick. As soon as he let go with his teeth he swatted it with all his strength and clawed at every patch of fur he could see. The Pollicle fell back momentarily and that gave Tugger just enough time to push it down and attack the creature's underbelly. Seeing nothing but red Tugger slashed away with his claws and watched as the beast rolled away and stood up dripping blood from several points on its body. Tugger could taste the blood on his tongue and it made him feel a little sick. He didn't care though and with another angry hiss he sent the dog running back along the trail as he stood there panting heavily with the murderous rage he held still fiery in his eyes.

Feeling a little victorious he spun around and readied himself for the other Pollicle. When he turned and found nothing there though he stopped dead and felt his courage and strength drain instantly. Suddenly a great wave of horror washed over him when he realised what had happened. He had been so busy with the other dog he hadn't watched the other. Now it had followed Misto and Bomba as they tried to get away and they were nowhere near strong enough to save themselves.

In a flash Tugger took off in the direction they had gone but staggered a little when he felt a sharp pain radiate from around his abdomen. He looked down to see spots of red cover his fur and as soon as he saw his injuries the pain properly started. That Pollicle must have bitten him there and now that he could see it he really felt the pain.

That wasn't important at that time though. His mate was in trouble and he wasn't there to protect him anymore. As he tried to run he prayed that Misto would be alright. He simply couldn't bear to lose him, not after all they'd been through.

* * *

Misto sobbed as Bomba pulled him along. He didn't want to leave Tugger but there was simply no other choice. Bomba struggled to catch her breath as she tried to lug two bodies along with her and when they came to a dead end she cursed and dropped to her knees as she tried to find some energy. Misto stood nearby and continued sobbing as he looked back down the trail where they had come from. Maybe he could go back and help his mate; after all, how could he take on two Pollicles at once?

Hearing him so upset Bomba looked back to him and watched as he tried to stay strong.

"He'll be okay, he's always okay" she said through her panting

"But what if he's not?" sniffed Misto as he spoke to her for the first time in months. He didn't feel threatened by her at that point, there was too much else to worry about.

"He will be, he can always get himself out of a jam"

"I have to go back!" said Misto as he put his arms down and tried to make himself return to the action. Bomba couldn't let him do that and as such she pushed herself up and grabbed him tightly at the wrist.

"You can't!"

"He needs me!" said Misto desperately and tried to pull away from her.

"He told you to go! He's trying to give you enough time to get away!"

"What do you mean 'enough time'? You think they're going to kill him?"

"I don't know, Misto. All I do know is that he's sacrificing his own safety to give you yours. Let him do this for you!"

"You mean for you!" said Misto angrily through the tears making Bomba pause before she carried on.

"Not for me, for the kitten" she said more solemnly. "He doesn't care what happens to me, he only cares about his kitten and that's why he's trying to keep me safe too"

Misto just sobbed a little more and tried to think straight as he stood there with the sound of angry scuffling radiating from somewhere else in the junkyard.

"Misto, he loves you, that's why he sent you away. Don't let it be in vain"

Misto looked back at her and tried to make himself believe what she was saying. It was hard though since he didn't trust her one bit and even now he really didn't like her.

Both of them were snapped out of their respective feelings when they heard a growling come from the trail they had been running on and they both staggered back against the junk when they saw the menacing stare of one of the Pollicles come back at them.

"Everlasting!" said Misto breathily, "They got him!"

Bomba just stared back at the Pollicle and shook her head in disbelief. This could not be happening; she couldn't go out now! She had a kitten to protect!

In a flurry she grabbed onto Misto and threw him as hard as she could up the junk. It wasn't very far and when he landed she desperately started hoisting him up by the hips.

"Get up!" she shouted, "Get up now!"

Misto was in shock and he could barely understand what was happening as he was pushed around. When he made it to the top of the junk he stared back down with a look of complete disbelief on his face and he barely saw Bomba trying to climb up as the Pollicle slowly advanced towards her with a hungry grin on its blood smeared face. The red queen desperately reached up to Misto and begged him to help her but he just stared back down as he tried to come to terms with Tugger being dead. As she reached she felt the Pollicle move closer to her and she started to cry out fearfully as she looked back and saw it look her straight in the eyes.

"Misto! Help me! Please!" she screamed as she reached up.

Misto continued looking back and a second later he was snapped out of his daze when he caught her pleading eyes. Now he had a dilemma. Here was the queen that had ruined his life just a couple of months ago and she was asking for his help. He had her life in his paws and letting her fall into the jaws of the Pollicle seemed like a very befitting way of getting retribution. As he crouched down on top of the junk he started to consider leaving her to the mercy of the dog and even came as close as getting up and walking away. Then he'd be rid of her, then all of the upset and pain she'd caused would be gone and he would have gotten his revenge.

It was just as he was about to do so when he looked deeper into her eyes and saw more there. They acted like a mirror and showed him himself as he waited there doing nothing. He knew he was not the kind of cat to do nothing, he could never kill another or even two in this case. He was a good, loving cat and now when he was presented with the chance to take his revenge he knew he couldn't do it. Despite everything she'd done he couldn't kill Bomba and in a flash he reached out his paw to her.

Straight away she locked hers around his and he pulled up hard on the heavy queen – and she was exactly that: heavy. Misto was smaller than her and he struggled desperately to pull her massive weight up on top of the junk. He tried with all his might but the progress was slow and unfortunately that was not a characteristic they could afford at that moment. The slowness was enough to let the Pollicle see what was happening and in a quick decision it lunged forward and closed its jaws around the red queen's swollen abdomen. As it did she let out a blood-curdling scream as she was pulled brutally out of Misto's grip and as she went down Misto watched in horror as she slipped away.

When the dog pulled away from the junk it spun her around and shook her wildly back and forth making every part of her that was not inside its mouth flail madly. It was so violent Bomba couldn't even scream and as she felt the dog bite down searing pain rocketed through her like electricity.

Misto couldn't believe what he was seeing and was sickened by the horrific sight before him. This couldn't be! He had forced himself to show mercy to her and now it had been ripped away. She needed to live because she had a kitten to give birth to. That was the most innocent and pure life Misto could conceive of and he couldn't stand by and watch its mother get torn apart.

In a snap decision Misto hurled himself off of the junk and flew through the air until he landed on top of the Pollicle. The surprise smack on top of it made the Pollicle release Bomba as it shook her and as it did she flew across the clearing and landed hard on the ground.

As it stood the Pollicle couldn't reach Misto as he sunk his claws into the dumb animal's back and it began to throw itself back and forth in an attempt to dislodge him. The tux knew he didn't have the strength to fight the dog if it threw him off and he also knew there was only one thing that could save them now.

Summoning all his strength he prayed that he could do what he had in mind and struggled to concentrate his recently rediscovered power into his paws. With a loud shout and a tight grip he discharged all of his energy into the Pollicle and as he did a shocking explosion of sparks blew from his paws. The Pollicle couldn't even yelp as the power surged through it and as a result it was thrown across the clearing and landed in a heap.

Misto fell to the ground where the Pollicle had just been and flicked his head around to look at the creature he'd just disarmed. It was unmoving and smoke slowly wafted away from its body as it lay there dead. The tux looked down at his paws and saw the last of the sparkle the remained there fizzle away and inside he felt the power he'd known before firmly find its home once again inside him.

When he heard the sound of sprinting again he looked up towards the trail and was amazed to see Tugger barrelling along with blood covering his fur. Misto jumped up straight away and ran to him. When they connected he threw his arms around his mate and cried into his fur knowing now that he hadn't lost his true love.

"I thought you were dead!" sobbed Misto as Tugger wrapped himself around him

"Everlasting Cat!" said Tugger in a half-chuckle half-sob. Reaching himself down he covered the top of Misto' head in kisses and rubbed firmly against him as he hugged him tightly. They were safe now that they had each other and nothing else mattered at that moment.

"When the Pollicle came we thought they'd gotten you. What happened?"

"Damn thing slipped away when I wasn't looking. I'm so sorry, Misty!"

This time Misto didn't reprimand him for calling him that name, he was simply too happy to have his mate back. He knew now that Tugger was such a big part of him that he couldn't be the cat he was without him. It was Tugger that returned his magic to him by his love and to know that Tugger nearly laid down his life for him was more than he could ever have asked for.

"I love you, Tugger!" said Misto as his sobs subsided

"I love you too, Misto" he replied and without waiting the two kissed each other deeply and lovingly.

The sound of Bomba gasping snapped them out of it and the two looked over to see her covered in blood.

"Everlasting Cat!" said Misto as they ran over to her and knelt down by her side. The red of her fur mixed with the red of her blood and the two were horrified when they saw a steady stream of it running down from between her legs. Misto knew what it meant straight away and once again tears filled his eyes.

"What? What is it?" pleaded Bomba as she saw him react and Tugger adopted her expression too.

"I'm sorry, Bomba" Misto said shakily as he looked down at the stream of blood and sniffed hard before saying, "We have to get you to Jenny as fast as we can"

"What do you mean?" asked Tugger quickly with Bomba sharing his desperate anticipation.

"We just have to go!" said Misto, "Tugger, pick her up!"

The big tom did so and together they went as fast as they could back down the trail.

* * *

With one final blow Munk sent the last of the Pollicles belting out of the junkyard with its tail between its legs and as he stood there in the clearing breathing angrily he slowly let his rage subside.

It took a good few minutes for him to let all of it go but once he was sure things were safe again he let himself fall to his knees and allowed the adrenaline to grab hold of his senses. It made him slightly dizzy as he knelt there and it took a fair while for his mind to come back to proper order.

As he did so he heard the gentle creeping of some of the Jellicles return to the clearing tentatively and when he heard someone approached he looked up to see who it was.

Standing next to him was Demeter and as they looked at each other she bent down and rubbed her head against his affectionately.

"Thank you" she whispered as she lingered there and a moment later she knelt down with him and hugged her mate tightly against her.

A few moments later they heard the voice of Tumblebrutus ring around the clearing and distract them from their moment of clam,

"Is it safe?" he yelled as he peeked over the junk.

"Yes, it's safe" called Munk exhaustedly. As soon as he said the words the rest of the Jellicles started to emerge cautiously and make their way down onto the ground. "Is anyone hurt?" he asked as he got up and looked around.

A few of them presented themselves quietly but apart from a few cuts and bruises it didn't seem anyone had sustained more injuries than he.

That was until everyone's attention was diverted to the sound of clattering across the clearing and they were all shocked by what they saw.

Misto fell forward first and ran across to the protector gripping him tightly,

"Munk! It's Bomba, she's hurt!"

"What do you mean?" he responded quickly

Misto reached himself up to the silver tabby's ear and whispered to him what he thought. The tom's eyes widened when he heard it and when he heard the clattering of his brother carrying the injured queen in his arms come from where Misto had emerged he ran over and looked down at her. What Misto had said all seemed true and the tabby wasted no time in turning back around,

"Jenny! Quickly!" he commanded making the tabby queen run over as he took Bomba out of his brother's arms. "Look!" he said as he gestured with his head towards the blood that Misto had mentioned was running from between Bomba's legs.

"Oh no" she said as she quickly deduced what it meant and then started to pull Munk in the direction of her den grabbing Jelly along the way.

Tugger was left confused and worried and was startled when he felt Misto approach him and place his paw on his arm.

"What's happening, Misto?" he asked delicately.

The smaller tom just looked back at him sadly and guided him over to the rest of the gathered Jellicles who shared equal confusion. As a group they muttered amongst themselves amidst the mess that was their home and soon they all gathered quietly outside Jenny's den as they waited for any news.

They were waiting for a long time.

* * *

Inside the den Jenny and Jelly battled to do what they could for Bomba but in the end it was no use. A lot of screaming and groaning from the red queen radiated to the outside of the den and made the waiting Jellicles cringe and become quite upset.

Many hours passed before everything fell silent and after a long while a pale-looking Jenny emerged with spots of blood dotted on her fur. Her usual, bright demeanour was gone now and in its place sat an appearance that looked like she had seen a ghost. It was unnerving for everyone and as she stood there silently she panned slowly across the crowd and picked Tugger out.

With intense slowness she made her way down and cats parted and reached out to her as she moved amongst them. When she got to Tugger she looked him in the eyes and gestured for him to come away with her for a moment. Tugger looked worriedly at Misto who stood next to him and could tell by how Jenny looked that what he assumed had been happening to Bomba was correct. The smaller tom forced himself to be strong for Tugger who still did not know what was going on and placed his paw on the bigger tom's arm.

The three walked a little way from the group until they were out of earshot and once they were far enough Jenny reached her own arms up and placed them on the coon.

"Tugger dear, I…I'm very sorry"

"She's not dead, is she?" he asked with less wariness than would have been expected.

Jenny shook her head, "Oh, no, she'll be okay…it's just the kittens…"

"Kittens?" asked Tugger more cautiously while gripping Misto a little more tightly.

"Yes, dear…I'm afraid she lost them…"

Tugger just stood there and stared back at her. He was still having trouble coming to terms with the word 'kittens'.

"There was more than one?" he asked quietly

Jenny nodded and gritted her teeth to stop herself from crying.

"And they both…?" he asked not being able to say the final word.

"Yes. I'm so very sorry" she said before looking down, "The pollicle shook her too roughly and it…the kittens…they couldn't survive it"

Tugger was left standing there with a look of total disbelief on his face. Misto watched him as he stood stock-still and did his best not to cry as well. This was worse news than Bomba falling pregnant in the first place and he had never ever even considered that this might have happened. Sure, he wished she hadn't been pregnant but he had never wanted her to loose her kitten – or now as it seemed: kittens. The tux struggled to keep it together and placed his paw over where Tugger gripped him.

The bigger tom looked down at his mate and looked deep into his eyes for some kind of clarity but there was nothing he could do to understand this. Slowly Misto placed his arms around him and hugged him tightly while he tried to come to terms with having lost his kittens. He didn't know how he was meant to feel; on the one paw he wanted to feel relieved but on the other he felt incredibly sad that his own kittens had been killed. He had never wanted them in the first place but even so he never wanted to lose them.

As he started to realise the situation at hand he placed his arms around the smaller tom that hugged him tightly and simply stood there not moving and not saying anything either. There they stayed for a long time finding comfort in each other and both knew that there was nowhere else they wanted to be.

It wasn't long before the news made its way around the junkyard and as such it put everyone into a deep state of grief. Slowly everyone slunk away – some sobbing quietly - but not Misto and Tugger. Those two stayed where they were and didn't move as they held each other close for a long time.

Tugger didn't know why but he was devastated.

**Next chapter soon. Thanks for reading, please review. x**


	17. Failure To Launch

**Lady Admetus, CrazyIndigoChild and Delphicoracle-Cat: Best reviews ever! Truly they were spectacular and I am so grateful to you all for being so kind! Something that y'all picked up on was writing action sequences; they are freakin' hard to write! I was reading them back to myself before I put the chapter up and was thinking that they weren't good enough but I didn't really know how to make them any better. If I were making a movie then I'd be set but I'm not and writing is harder. Still, I'm glad I did a good enough job!**

**Once again, here's another shaggingly long chapter. I just can't seem to do these short anymore!**

**WARNING: Almost-sexual situations (you'll see what I mean).**

**Love Is No Fairytale**

**Chapter 17**

**Failure To Launch**

Misto sat on his bed looking over at Tugger who stood across from him leaning against the wall staring blankly towards the ground. The bigger tom hadn't said a word since the previous night when he'd learned of Bomba's terrible loss and it had taken a considerable amount of effort for Misto to lead him out of the clearing and into their den. Tugger had barely moved when he'd gotten inside and Misto had been watching him ever since the bigger tom had gotten up from the bed where he had been placed. As the tux sat there he looked down at his paws and then at his front which was stained a reddish brown from the blood that had soaked into his fur. Misto didn't know which there was more of: Tugger's blood or Bomba's blood. What he was certain of was that both were there and that some of it was the remnant of innocent death. When he looked up he refocused on Tugger and saw that there was far more of it soaked into him and Misto felt so incredibly sad for him. The feelings that must have been going through him at that moment must have been soul-destroying and it hurt Misto to see his mate so inwardly distraught. Slowly he got up from the bed and walked over to Tugger who didn't even flinch when Misto placed a paw on his back.

"Tug?" asked Misto quietly. When he got no response he stepped around to Tugger's side and bent down to try and catch his eyes, "Tugger?"

"They didn't even have a chance…" said Tugger meekly without looking up.

"I know" said Misto sadly and felt stupid for what he said next, "Are you okay?"

Tugger shook his head gently,

"I don't know" he said with a sigh, "I don't know how to feel…"

Misto put his other paw on Tugger and rubbed gently where they rested as he tried to grasp at any comforting words for his mate,

"You can feel however you want, darling"

"But I don't know how I want to feel. I don't even know what I'm sad about or if I'm sad at all"

Misto looked down momentarily and then looked back up with even more sympathy in his eyes,

"Are you sure you don't know if you're sad?"

It was then Tugger's turn to pause. A moment later he took a deep breath as if he were getting ready to say something long and detailed but when he came out with nothing he let it go and simply mumbled,

"Okay…I'm…yes"

"That's okay, dear. It's okay, you know?"

"But is it?"

Misto was a little taken aback,

"What do you mean?"

"What am I even sad for? This kinda works out for the best, doesn't it?" said Tugger trying to sound convinced. Misto just shook his head gently,

"No, Tug. You know this is still bad"

"It doesn't have to be. It's like Bomba was never pregnant so we can just go back to how we were. Life is perfect again"

"But that's not really the way you feel, is it?" said Misto as more of a statement than a question. He knew his Tugger well enough to know he wasn't at all happy about what had happened only hours before. Tugger paused again before he carried on,

"I can make myself feel that way…"

"No you can't, darling. You know you can't do that"

Tugger sighed and kept his eyes on the ground,

"What am I sad about, Misto? Tell me"

"Tug, you know what you're sad about" replied Misto softly as he started to rub Tugger's fur.

"But I don't. It's like I'm sad but I don't know why"

Misto stopped for second and puzzled over what Tugger was saying. Surely he couldn't have forgotten? He then toyed with the idea that Tugger didn't know how to handle his feelings and therefore in his mind maybe they didn't exist in an active capacity. Biting his lip Misto swallowed hard and pressed on very gently,

"Your kittens, Tug…You…lost your kittens"

The tux watched as the bigger tom closed his eyes and exhaled softly as the words hit him. What an awful thing to have to hear.

"But…were they? I never wanted them in the first place…"

"But that didn't mean you didn't care, did it?" said Misto gently making Tugger look at him briefly.

"No…I didn't…" struggled Tugger before Misto jumped back in.

"You don't have to protect me, darling. I know you still cared about them. I mean, it wasn't them you were mad at…or did wrong to"

Tugger looked back down and simply said,

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt…you"

"It's okay, darling. Whatever happened before…right now it doesn't matter."

That made Tugger look up again and look at Misto with eyes of such incredible sadness. He seemed to be on the edge of breaking down but was holding on to his last speck of composure. Misto responded with as much kindness as he could display and gave Tugger a gentle smile before carrying on,

"I know the circumstances were all wrong but…they were your kittens and…you can be sad for them if you want"

Tugger swallowed noticeably and took a deep breath before straightening up and turning towards the tux,

"I just don't-" he began before the words caught in his throat and he clenched his fists. Misto saw it all and placed his paws on his mate.

"It's alright, Tugger, don't fight it…"

Tugger nodded gently and then attempted to raise his arms. Before he could get them halfway a single tear broke free from his eye and was soon followed by others along with a quivering jaw. Seeing this, Misto slowly pulled Tugger into his arms and held the bigger tom as his legs started to give way beneath him. He then proceeded to put his weight onto Misto as he went to pieces. Moments later he started to sniff and then he began to sob uncontrollably into Misto's shoulder soaking the fur there with his tears which mixed with the dried blood that stuck therein. Struggling to support the heavy tom Misto gradually walked him over to their bed and sat him down while he allowed him to continue crying into his shoulder.

It was surreal for Misto since up until now he'd been the one finding comfort in the Maine Coon. It seemed that through their entire relationship it had always been him going to Tugger for comfort and using his embrace to hide from the world. Now that Tugger was the most vulnerable it made him feel very strange but at the same time he felt he knew exactly what he needed to do. It was instinctive like a mother hen protecting her chicks and the tux continued to hug and gently rub his mate as he let out his grief.

Through the sobs Tugger managed a few broken words,

"I just…can't believe they're dead…I never…never wanted them but…I never wanted…them to die"

"I know, darling" said Misto as he struggled to stay strong, "it's horrible but it happened. I'm so sorry"

Tugger continued to cry and eventually managed to shakily say,

"I'm sorry…I'm so sorry"

"What for?" said Misto quietly

"For being like this…you don't need it…not after…" Tugger said through sniffs

Misto suddenly felt so indebted in his heart. Even now after losing his kittens Tugger was still trying to think of him. It was incredibly kind and Misto didn't know what to do for a moment. After a long pause he spoke,

"You've been so kind to me, even though I didn't know how to forgive you. You've been there for me despite me telling you to go away and now I know…it was because you loved me. It's my turn now, let me show you I love you…"

Tugger cried a little harder at that. It was such a wonderful thing for him to hear despite knowing that he'd hurt Misto so badly and that Misto hadn't known how to take him back. Putting all of the hurt aside, Misto was caring for him and trying to help him through. He knew that's all he needed; to have Misto holding him and sharing the grief was all he could have asked for and it warmed his heart as he waded through a freezing sea of pain that was the loss of his kittens that he was still only just coming to terms with.

"I love you, Misto" he said through the tears making Misto let out a single sob.

"I love you too, Tugger" replied the little tux as he held his mate.

There they remained for a long time simply holding each other as they cried out their mutual desolation.

* * *

Inside the stillness of Jenny's den, Bomba laid on the bed Misto had been using as she went in and out of drowsy consciousness. It had been very worrying for Jenny and Jelly when they had struggled to stop her bleeding and utterly horrifying to see the premature kittens emerge from their patient as her body rejected them. The whole ordeal had been made even worse considering how late-term the kittens were and how they were approaching their proper sizes. It had been beyond difficult – to say the very least - for Bomba to contend with pushing them out whilst knowing it was too early and it was crushing to hear nothing when they had been delivered. That silence she knew would haunt her for the rest of her life and it was utterly incomprehensible to have to go through it twice. The red queen had tried to look down to where her kittens were but she had been held where she was by Jelly as Jenny forced herself not to cry as she took them away. At the sight of the first kitten Jenny could have sworn she felt her heart stop momentarily over the truly shocking bundle of blood and flesh that already resembled a cat so clearly. As she fought to keep working through the violent shaking that gripped her she placed it out of Bomba's view in a towel while she had gone back to work on the other. A tiny glimmer of hope and desperation filled her entire body as she helped remove the other but when for the second time she saw no life looking back up at her it all flooded away. She'd seen stillbirths before, but not like this. This had possibly been the worst experience of her entire life and as soon as she'd hurried the dead kittens away from where Bomba lay she placed them - wrapped up in their little towel - in another part of the den and then found a corner out of view to let her emotions get the better of her for a few moments.

Bomba hadn't been awake for too long after the kittens left her body and welcomed the darkness that came over her like a blanket. While she slept Jenny and Jelly had worked to fix her other injuries and then left her to rest. Now that another morning had come she had opened her eyes and without moving her head just stared forward. From there she could see across the den but didn't take into account anything that was going on. Not that there was anything much going on anyway as the only other cat nearby was Jelly slumped in a chair snoozing soundly. She had taken it in turns with Jenny to keep an eye on Bomba but both had been through quite terrible ordeals themselves and as such were totally drained.

Bomba didn't feel anything. She felt so numb and her thoughts were fairly straightforward and uninteresting. The only things that passed through her mind were how quiet everything was around her as well as how thirsty she was. In her daze nothing else crossed her mind and it wasn't until Jenny came in that any other kind of stimulation greeted her.

The tabby queen first stopped at Jelly and gently woke her only to send her away for some rest. Once the yellow queen had gone the other came over to Bomba and looked down at her sadly as she checked her over. Seeing her eyes open she gently spoke to her,

"Hello, dear. How are you feeling now?"

Bomba was still for a moment and then looked up at her wondering what she meant. Very slowly she turned her head and moved her arms up as she went to push herself up. As soon as she started pushing she felt a sharp pain run through her starting around her naval. The sting lingered as she painfully scooted up the bed. Her mind was still a haze but then she pushed the blanket that covered her off of her body and looked down.

With a look of frightened inquisitiveness she reached her paw up and gently placed it on her stomach before timidly rubbing across it. At first she wondered why she wasn't quite as fat as she had been before she went to sleep but then it all came flooding back to her. In an instant she remembered why her bump was smaller and realised that there was nothing there to give her a bump anymore. Straight away her breaths became deeper and gradually began to grow faster. As the memory continued to tighten its grip her eyes grew wider and her breaths became more audible. Jenny watched as her patient began to hyperventilate and placed her paws on her in an attempt to calm her down. Gently she spoke to her but it was no use. Bomba began to shake violently and continued struggling to catch her breath. In a moment she became woozy again and her vision quickly became blurry. Mercilessly the horror of what had happened soon ended and once again she was unconscious.

Jenny carefully repositioned the red queen in the bed and then just watched her for a while. She had no idea how she was going to go about coming to terms with losing her kittens and it filled her with even more sadness to think about the terrible plight she was about to go through. And to think, first Misto with a ruined life and now her. How could things possibly become any worse in their little tribe that used to be so perfect?

* * *

A few hours passed and inside their den Misto watched Tugger sleep on their bed. Tugger had eventually stopped crying and asked Misto if he could go to sleep for a while. Misto had been a little confused by Tugger asking if he could do so but quickly realized he wasn't thinking clearly. Delicately he had helped his mate to lie down and had lain alongside him until he had drifted off. Once he was sleeping Misto had remained next to him just watching as he slowly breathed in and out and wondered how on earth he was going to get him through this terrible mess.

He felt terrible for it but somewhere inside of himself Misto felt a little glimmer of happiness. Not for the death of the kittens – he'd never dream of being happy about that – but for the fact that the tables had been turned. Now it was he that was needed instead of him needing Tugger. Suddenly Tugger needed him to support him and show him love and it seemed to Misto that it was the first serious time that it had ever happened. It filled him with pride to know that he was the only one that could help Tugger through and thinking back to how Tugger had tried to prove to him that he loved him made him relish the challenge of doing it himself.

For a few minutes Misto had snuggled up closer to Tugger and closed his eyes as he drew his mate's head into the crook of his neck. It would have been strange to look at since Misto wasn't nearly as tall as Tugger and his stature was both smaller and more lithe; the tux was not able to cradle Tugger as he wished since the bigger tom extended past Misto in almost every way but it didn't matter. Misto felt good for being the comforter for once and that was all that was important. In his mind he said a few simple words as he gently stroked the bigger tom's fur,

'_I'll help you through, Tug. I promise you and I promise myself' _

After a few long moments had passed he gently released Tugger and moved off of the bed to look back at him as he stood. Tugger looked a terrible mess and desperately needed a clean. He was covered in dried blood and it made Misto feel a little sick to know where it had come from. He did not like looking at it and straight away he decided it needed to go. Slowly he got back onto the bed and went to work with his tongue on Tugger's body trying desperately hard not to wake him. At first the taste was sickening but soon it faded away and Misto was no longer licking off tainted blood but rather performing an act of incredible kindness for his mate. Tugger would surely not have been able to do this himself and Misto shrugged internally when he realised it was always going to have had to be to be him who cleaned Tugger up.

After a few minutes he leant back and took a look at where he had been licking on Tugger's fur. Already he could see an improvement and it made him smile a little to think he was doing a good job. Wasting no time he went back to the task at hand and moved on to Tugger's stomach. He continued to comb through Tugger's fur for a long time and as he kept going he eventually started to return the fur to its original colour of sleek black and vibrant leopard spots. Misto smiled a little wider when he realised his licking gave Tugger's fur a little extra shine and felt a little smug when he figured it must have been his magic. Soon his mind began to wander and the sadness he felt within got pushed aside as he remembered that his magic had returned to him. It felt so great to be the old Misto once more and he made a mental note that if he had time he'd find a quiet spot somewhere in the junkyard and try out his magic to see if it was still working properly. That is, of course, if he could hoodwink his way out of the massive cleanup operation Munk was sure to mount shortly. The junkyard was in quite a state of disarray and it made Misto want to giggle when he thought about how it was always in that state since it was by nature a junkyard. It would never be in order but Misto knew what Munk would be getting at. Things had to have a general shape and he knew how fussy the silver tabby could be when it came to keeping things in line. That is if he was in any state to be barking commands or directing the workflow due to his injuries. Surely he'd be out of action for a few days having gone through what he had the night before and Misto thought that if he saw him outside today then truly he was a robot.

Misto allowed his thoughts to consume him as he happily progressed with cleaning Tugger up and as continued working he didn't realise which point on Tugger's body he was working towards. Tugger was unsurprisingly quite ticklish at his paws and as Misto worked down his arms he forgot about how sensitive he could be. Without thinking he turned Tugger's paw over and began cleaning away the blood with his tongue only to open his eyes wide with surprise when he felt the paw flinch in his grasp as soon as he touched it as well as the rest of Tugger's body convulse in kind. Misto stayed still for a moment hoping it was just a reflex before he directed his eyes up towards Tugger's face. He once again remained still when he saw the bigger tom look back down at him with an expression as if to say: 'What in the name of the Everlasting Cat are you doing?' They stared at each other without moving for a moment before Misto pulled his tongue back into his mouth and sat up with a sheepish look on his face. Tugger remained in the same position but kept eye contact with the tux as he tried to process what he'd just seen.

After a few awkward moments Tugger opened his mouth and with slightly narrowed eyebrows began to speak,

"What are you doing?"

Misto bit his lip for a moment and then nervously answered him,

"I'm…just cleaning you up"

Tugger looked down at his body to see patches with less reddish brown than before and then directed his vision back to Misto.

"Why?"

"I thought it would help…and I didn't think you'd want to do it yourself"

"What?"

"It's just that it's such a nasty job and it's not fair that you would have to do it having gone through…you know…everything. Besides, I know how you always like to look your best"

Tugger was quiet for another long moment before his expression softened and he gave Misto a look of deep appreciation and gratitude. At that moment he simply could not think of a kinder gesture and he felt so blessed to have a mate so caring and loving to do that for him without even asking.

"I…thank you," whispered Tugger as he was overcome with a solemnity that masked his strained emotions.

With a gentle smile Misto replied, "You're more than welcome," and then lowered his head to carry on.

As he continued his licking Tugger felt the tux's tongue move across his body and it made him feel so wonderful. This was the most basic, primal method of showing love that he could imagine and to know that Misto was doing it because he cared so much struck something deep inside Tugger that soon became hard for him to hide.

As he groomed, Misto felt Tugger's body start to shake and when he heard the gentle, staggered exhale that was distinctive of sobbing he looked up to see Tugger was his head leant to one side as he tried to hide his face with his paw. The big tom was so overcome with gratitude and love all whilst also trying to contend with a bubbling cauldron of pain and hurt from his loss that he simply could not contain his emotion. At first it made Misto wonder if he had done something wrong but he soon cottoned on to why Tugger was crying again. Straight away he moved back up Tugger's body and rubbed his head against his to let him know he was there.

"Hey, it's alright," he said gently, "I'm here"

Tugger sniffed a little more before he managed to squeeze words out,

"Thank you, Misto. I love you so much"

Misto just smiled back and rubbed against him again before giving him a hug,

"I love you too, darling. Now, let me finish…"

"You don't have to…really, you don't"

Misto smiled at him, "I want to. Just let me look after you"

He then went back to work and for the remainder of the job he felt Tugger sob quietly up above him. It was both beautiful and harrowing and when he had finally finished and Tugger looked a hundred times better he moved back up along his body and snuggled up to him tightly. They didn't say anything for a while and simply lay in each other's arms. They'd come to do a lot of that in the imminent future as their need for each other's comfort became greater than it ever had been before.

* * *

Back in the den across the clearing, Jenny watched Bomba fiercely when she saw the red queen's eyes start to move behind her eyelids again. Very delicately Bomba soon opened them and took a sharp breath when she came back to reality. This time the memory hit her straight away and Jenny could see it in the expression she quickly adopted. With desperate, pleading eyes she looked up to the tabby queen and took a few moments to stutter silently before she managed to form the words she prayed the answer to which would be no,

"Was it real?" she whispered, "Did it really happen?"

Jenny felt the emotion stir within her again and fought back the sadness that rose inside her like an angry snake. She replied with a gentle nod of her head and then simply said,

"I'm sorry, dear"

Bomba made a tiny squeak as her throat tightened with the extreme emotional pain and gasped after a few moments without breathing. Every time the memory of what had happened to her crossed her mind she relived it and the gut wrenching, horrifying pain of the ordeal was truly terrible to have to go through over and over again. From there on the bed she continued to look up at Jenny and simply could not move from the sheer weight of her strife. To have been carrying her kittens only hours ago and now for them to be completely gone was more than she knew how to bear and it stabbed at her heart to know that the life she had come to know and love within her was over before it had even begun. That word 'dead' hurt her more than anything else. To associate it with her kittens tore her apart and it just didn't seem right or fair that those innocent little beings had been killed. They were gone now and they weren't coming back and the worst part of it was that she had never gotten to meet them. On the one paw she felt she knew them but she had never seen them in real life. Not even when she had pushed them out had she seen them since they were whisked away so quickly and to know that she had never held them in her arms ripped a huge hole inside her into which she felt she was falling with a constantly decreasing chance of her ever getting out. With each step she took in coming to terms with what had happened to her the world she lived in world seemed to be collapsing in on itself and it scared her beyond anything she had ever known.

As she lay there she began to rack with painful sobs and before she knew it rivers of tears were running down her cheeks. She didn't understand her feelings because she never had a chance to get to know her kittens and it tormented and frightened her when thoughts such as wishing she could follow her kittens into death and wishing it was her that had died instead of them instinctively emanated through her mind. Her mind didn't know why she thought these things but something in her heart told her the things that words could not describe. It was as if she knew the answers to all of the horrible questions but they were too painful to even begin to understand. Above all of the confusion however there was one truth that came forward that she knew with every fibre of her being to be true: She had loved her kittens. She had loved them with her whole soul and even though she never held them she still knew them so well. They had been a part of her and she had nurtured them right up until their lives had been cut short. Therein lay another confusion: Had their lives really been cut short? Had they even had lives? They certainly had been alive because she had felt them but they had never lived. Not really. It was crushing to know that the life she had protected and come to live for had never even started and since they had been a part of her for that short while it felt that a massive piece of her was missing.

The sobbing soon grew stronger and as she cried harder and harder Jenny sat down beside her and drew her close. There Bomba began to cry hysterically into her fur and all the tabby queen could do was hold her hoping that by some grace of the Everlasting Cat the red queen would survive. She had no doubt that Bomba could recover physically – after all she was young and incredibly fit – but she had seen emotions play havoc with cats before and she knew that losing a kitten could signal the end for a mother in the most extreme of cases. She knew the gravity of the situation Bomba was in, after all she was a mother herself and she knew that if it were she to have lost a kitten she would not know how to carry on. That is precisely how Bomba felt as she cried on and on and the two simply remained there for a long time as the red queen grieved.

* * *

A little while later Misto finally leant back after having lapped up the last of the dried blood and hazily admired his work. After the initial euphoria of helping his mate had worn off he had started to feel quite sick when he realised what it was that he had been licking at. Sure, cleanliness for a cat was paramount and most substances wouldn't pose much of a problem. This was blood though, and worse than that it was Bomba's blood. Associating it with her losing her kittens made Misto started to feel really ill and with a great struggle he did his best to think of something else while he worked. It hadn't been too successful though and now as he stared down at Tugger - who looked remarkably cleaner – the reality of what he'd licked up started to set in.

Tugger had managed to gain a hold on his emotions a few minutes beforehand and as such continued to lay there in silent gratitude for his mate's act of kindness. He wanted to tell Misto how much he loved him for doing it but he was absolutely lost for words and even so he was distracted when Misto stood up suddenly.

"Excuse me," the tux said through clenched teeth before hastily walking towards the doorway. In a flash he hopped out of the den and disappeared from sight momentarily. He had not, however, gone completely out of earshot and a few seconds later Tugger clenched his own teeth when he heard the distinctive sound of Misto hacking up his guts. He sympathized with him, he really did; after all, in hindsight he reckoned that not even he would have wanted that job.

A few minutes passed without another sound and eventually Misto staggered back into the den with a slightly brighter albeit dizzy look on his face. He didn't speak at first, he merely wandered over to a teacup at the side of the den and lifted it. Tugger assumed it must have been filled with water when Misto took a long sip, swilled the contents around his mouth, walked over to the doorway again and spat it all out. The tux repeated the actions a few times before he looked back at Tugger and walked over more steadily.

Looking down, he smiled at his mate and spoke softly,

"There, you look much better now"

Tugger was still speechless and in the end blathered out all he could think of,

"Sorry for making you sick"

Misto closed his eyes again and kept them closed for a short while before he opened them once more after swallowing hard and exhaling heavily.

"It's okay, I don't mind. At least you look better now"

Tugger looked down at his fur and raised his arms up to admire Misto's work. He smiled when he saw the glossy sheen Misto's grooming had given him and he returned his gaze to the tux after a few moments of enjoying it.

"Thank you, Misto"

"Don't mention it," he replied before settling back on the bed next to the bigger tom.

"No, I really mean it. Thank you. Thank you bringing me back here and thank you for cleaning me up."

"Well, I love you, Tug. I know I love you and that's what mates do when they love each other. You know I'd do anything for you, right? Just like you'd do anything for me; like fighting those Pollicles"

"What?"

"Last night, when you sent me and Bomba away. You took them on all by yourself and you still came out the other side"

Tugger instantly felt grimmer,

"But one got away and it nearly got you. I should have been able to stop it and now…"

He stopped when words escaped him once more. He didn't know how to even begin explaining how he saw the whole situation and it left him utterly dumfounded. Misto – seeing this – just rubbed at him gently and spoke for him,

"It's not your fault. Everything was happening so fast and none of us knew what was going on. You did your best, darling, it's just…the odds were against us…"

Tugger looked up at him with a regretful expression. In his heart he wished he could have been there for Misto when the Pollicle had come at him and he even felt guilty that had he been able to stop it Bomba would not have lost their kittens. He was so confused by everything though; about his feelings towards Bomba, about his feelings towards the kittens, about those feelings in relation to Misto. It was all too much and he simply didn't want to have to deal with them.

Closing his eyes again in defeat he simply lay back and tried to sleep. That's all he wanted to do at that moment and he wished just a tiny bit that maybe if he could sleep for long enough then all of these problems would go away. He knew it was stupid but at that moment he no longer cared for reality. Reality was too hard to bear and he relished the idea of escaping it for a while, even if it was only for the amount of time he was unconscious.

Misto stayed with him as he slept and kept him warm as he snoozed a little himself. In the silence he thought about Bomba and how he wished he'd acted sooner. He knew those thoughts were dangerous but he simply couldn't shake them; could it have been that as a result of his slow reaction the kittens' blood was on his paws?

* * *

In another den across from Misto and Tugger, Munk lay against his will in his own bed. Demeter had taken it upon herself to make sure that he didn't move an inch and that every one of his wishes was catered for. It did her no good to see her mate in such a rough state even though if she were to look properly she'd see no more than a few cuts and bruises. The silver tabby had even tried to point this out to her many times since he'd limped back into their den but she wasn't having any of it. Straight away he'd been put to bed and ever since he'd been there Demeter hadn't faltered in her efforts.

"Deme, I'm fine. Really" said Munk exasperatedly

The black and gold queen was not put at ease,

"You think you can fight off that many Pollicles all by yourself then limp back in here like you did and expect me to believe that you're fine? Not a chance, Munkustrap"

Munk frowned a little. She never called him Munkustrap apart from when she was cross or being deadly serious. In a way it felt like he was a kitten being chastised for having done something naughty and it felt strange since he was meant to be the one to deliver such scoldings. With a sigh he pressed on in what he knew really was vain,

"It's just a few surface wounds, nothing to worry about"

"I don't care, Munkustrap, you'll stay where you are for now"

"Deme, darling, I still have a job to do"

"I reckon Alonzo can manage for a few days"

"You know, he was hurt too. I reckon between us we could make up at least one protector"

The attempt at lightening the mood failed dismally and in return Munk received only a firm frown. It let him know that despite what he said he wasn't getting out of this round-the-clock care and after a few moments of further contemplation he reluctantly resigned to it. He was smart and in the end he knew that aggravating his mate while she was forcing him to do as she said was more trouble than it was worth and it was always better to have a happy Demeter rather than an angry one. Angry Demeter Munk had come to know was not a pleasant queen and he knew it would serve him well not to argue.

It was then that Munk had an idea. In a way it was strangely cunning for him since he was the cat that never did anything sneaky or suspicious. It seemed to be just what he needed though to get his mate out of his hair for a while and the prospect of using her own sensibilities against her made the silver tabby feel strangely devious. With a tiny smirk he began to speak to her again,

"How do you think Demeter's doing?" he asked nonchalantly. It made Demeter pause for a moment and then straighten up in apparent surprise.

"I haven't even thought about her…" she replied airily. Munk watched as the thought propagated through her mind and took hold of her. At first she remained surprised but then she seemed to become uneasy and eventually saddened. She had been so busy with Munk that she had completely forgotten about her best friend and it made her feel incredibly guilty to think that she was all alone in Jenny's den. Well, not all alone. She did after all have Jenny and Skimble around her but that didn't equate to proper support. No one knew her better or loved her more than Demeter and the black and gold queen felt an incredible guilt take her when she realised she had neglected her. It wasn't for nothing though, was it? She had been taking care of Munk and he was after all her mate. Surely he needed care too and since Bomba was covered by Jenny then there was no problem, right?

She didn't believe herself for a second and realised what a poor friend she had been. It was unfair of her to leave Bomba to try and handle her situation without her there and she knew she had to get across to her straight away. Could she leave Munk though? He'd surely defy her as soon as she left and she didn't want to see him injuring himself any more than he already was.

With a firm expression she looked back at him and gave him the steeliest eyes she could manage. In a steady, heavy voice she spoke to him,

"If I go and see her will you promise not to get out of bed?"

Munk could see she wasn't joking and for a moment felt a little intimidated. It would figure that the cat forcing him to stay where he was the one cat that he'd do anything for and suddenly Munk found himself between a rock and a hard place. He didn't want to anger Demeter but he didn't want to stay in bed any longer. He knew he could use the rest but that wasn't at all his style. In the end he supposed he could keep an eye out for her coming back and then scamper back into bed before she even realised he'd been up. With a convincing smile he lied,

"Yes, dear. Of course I promise"

"Good" she said before hurrying off to Jenny's. Hopefully she wasn't too late to help Bomba.

Munk was left alone and being the smart cat he was he left it a few minutes before he started to move just in case she came back for something. Feeling stiff everywhere he moved his legs over to the side of the bed and started to push himself up. He groaned as he felt his muscles protest and decided to fall back and have another try in a few moments after the aching subsided. It felt like he'd been run over he was so stiff and it made him wonder if maybe Demeter had been onto something.

A few moments later he tried again and this time he managed to sit himself up on the edge of the bed. There he sat for a little while breathing slowly and trying to gently stretch himself out. It was not a pleasurable experience and in the end he gave it up. He admitted it to himself: Demeter was right; he could use a rest after all. Rolling his eyes he placed himself back on the bed and lay there staring up at the ceiling hoping that sleep would soon take him.

He didn't have long to start feeling drowsy when he was disturbed by the distinctive sound of a cat hopping into the den. The silver tabby turned his head and looked across to the doorway and was surprised to see Skimble standing there.

"Hello, Skimble. What can I do for you?" he asked as brightly as he could.

"I saw your lassie came over to my den and thought it might be a good time to offer you some of this" said the ginger tabby in his thick Scottish drawl as he presented a bottle of scotch. It was a signature of Skimble to always have some of it stashed away somewhere and Munk felt grateful to be offered some.

"You know I don't drink" he replied with a smile

"Ah, give over. I know even you could use a drop after what you went through last night"

"I suppose," said Munk smiling wider and gesturing for Skimble to sit nearby him. The ginger cat complied and as he came over grabbed a couple of containers – whatever they were neither one of them could determine. As Skimble poured some of the amber liquid out he gave the first one to Munk and then held up his own. They touched them together and then both took a sip. It went down smoothly and it was nice for both of them to be able to appreciate it together when it seemed to make everybody else in those parts recoil in disgust.

"Thanks for this, Skimble," said Munk feeling incredibly grateful

"Well, you deserve it after putting yourself on the line like you did last night"

"Had to be done. Pollicles need to know they can't come around here and mess around like that"

"Of course. What on earth do you think brought them around in the first place?"

"I reckon they were just looking for trouble. You know how it is: Pollicles see a group of Jellicles and then all hell breaks loose"

"Stupid bastards" said Skimble taking another drink. The way he said the second word amused Munk and he too took another drink. "Do you think they'll be back anytime soon?"

"I doubt it. I hope I gave them a clear enough message"

"Just how much damage did you do?"

"I'm not sure but there's enough blood on the ground out there and I know none of it belongs to any of us"

Skimble was quiet for a moment and the spoke reservedly,

"Well, one of us…"

"Oh…of course" said Munk feeling a little stupid for having forgotten about Bomba in that short a space of time, "How is she today?"

Skimble sighed, "Not good. She woke up this morning and seemed pretty normal at first but I think she's so traumatized that she had forgotten. She realised a little while later and then it all came back and she fainted again"

"Is she okay? I mean, physically?"

"Jenny thinks so but that's not what's worrying her at the moment. She's more concerned with how she's going to come to terms with having a miscarriage"

"Well clearly…" said Munk trailing off briefly, "Did she wake up again?"

"Yes" said Skimble gravely, "She managed to stay awake this time but she went to pieces as soon as she did. Poor lass…"

"I can't imagine losing a kitten, let alone two in one go"

"I know what you mean, boyo. It's absolutely terrible"

The two remained silent for a little while as they let the grim subject hang in the air.

"What about Tugger?" asked Munk a few moments later. Skimble shook his head gently,

"No one's seen him. He must still be in his den with Misto"

"Hmm" hummed Munk, "I suppose that's the best place for him to be. Then again, I wonder if Misto's in any state to look after Tugger having gone through what he has"

Skimble leant back and sighed again,

"What's happened to our quiet little tribe? Everything used to be so peaceful and calm but I can't believe everything that's happened in the year up to this point. I mean, first Misto nearly died after we almost cast him out and then Tugger cheats on him and gets the queen he cheated with pregnant. Now Pollicles have come in and made a huge mess as well as terrifying everyone and worst of all making Bomba miscarry. What more could go wrong?"

Munk knew it was all true and he couldn't help feeling it was his fault. He was meant to stop things like this from happening and the fact that it had all happened while he sat idly by made him feel really low.

"I should have stopped it all…" he said as he looked dismally down into his scotch.

Skimble felt like an idiot for saying it the way he had and quickly tried to correct what he felt he'd said,

"You mustn't blame yourself lad. There was nothing you could have done to stop any of it from happening so none of it's your fault"

"But still, I should have been able to stop things from getting as bad as they have"

Skimble shook his head, "No, lad. If things are going to end up terribly then there's nothing you can do to stop them. You did everything you could, it's just that these things were unpreventable"

"I don't know…"

"Come on, Munk, you know you can't blame yourself"

Munk took another drink,

"We'll see. I suppose the main thing now is trying to put everything back together"

"That's the spirit" said Skimble brightening up, "Things will get better sooner than you know it"

"I hope so. I'm still worried about Misto and Tugger though. They're strained as it is and I know Tugger can act strangely when he gets upset. I just hope Misto's strong enough to see it. He knows him better than I do but they've been through so much I'm worried that they might end up going down a road that can only lead to something bad"

"I suppose we'll just have to keep an eye on them. I'm sure we can prevent anything majorly terrible from happening."

"I hope you're right," said Munk trying to feign conviction.

Another silence passed before Skimble moved on,

"So, what are you going to tell your dad?"

Munk's heart sank like a ship full of bricks. He hadn't even considered Old Deuteronomy yet and he knew this was going to look bad whichever way he told it.

"Oh, bugger…" said Munk as he thought about telling his father about the previous night. In an instant he knocked back the rest of the scotch, winced as the burn of the alcohol moved down is throat and then stuck out his container towards the ginger tom. "More, please, Skimble. I think I'm going to need it."

* * *

Back across the junkyard, Misto and Tugger remained on the bed with the smaller tom holding his mate and gently rubbing the fur around his neck where the new mane was coming through. Misto thought back to the time when he had been tied down and had watched Tugger chop it off. It had been utterly staggering at the time but now he'd come to terms with it and realised just how big a gesture it was for Tugger to make. He didn't quite feel as happy as he thought he ought to have done though. Right before the Pollicles had come the day before they had been arguing and that had led into their night of terror. Now that Tugger was reeling from losing his kittens – or rather didn't really know how to feel – Misto wondered if they'd been set back further in their relationship making any progress they'd achieved in reconciling properly all for nothing.

Was it that plain though? After all they were snuggled together right now and surely that wasn't something cats did when they weren't in love? Or maybe it was just because they needed each other at that time regardless of what other abject feelings they might have. In any case Misto wondered what he was meant to believe and continued trying to think through his confusion even when Tugger stirred and opened his eyes again. Misto caught them when he looked up and smiled down to him gently,

"Hey, you" he said quietly

"Hey" replied Tugger with the same calmness, "How you doing?"

"Okay. I was just watching you sleep"

"You didn't have to if you didn't want to"

"It's alright, I like watching you sleep. I always used to do it when I woke up before you back before-" Misto paused. He didn't mean to bring up the subject of Tugger's infidelity again – as if his mate didn't have enough on his mind. Graciously Tugger helped him out of his jam,

"Before you went away"

"Right…" said Misto hoping he hadn't touched on a nerve too badly.

"I like you being here" said Tugger after a few moments, "It's so nice to have you beside me again. I really missed you"

"In all honesty I missed you too" said Misto as he smiled again. Tugger carried on a little more tentatively,

"Look, I don't want to push you or anything but…I'd really like it if you'd come back in here to stay. I mean, I don't really want to be alone right now and I know I shouldn't ask but I really need you and-"

"Shh. It's okay, I'm not going to leave you alone. Besides, you saved my life last night and if that doesn't count as a testament of love then I don't know what does"

Tugger smiled weakly but then let it fade when he replied,

"I just wish I could have saved everyone…"

Misto's own smile faltered when he heard the words and sighed quietly. He didn't really know how he was meant to help Tugger and he didn't want to say the wrong things. He had to say something though and it made him feel a little awkward when he said the only thing he could think of,

"You know it's not your fault, right?"

"It feels like my fault," said Tugger glumly, "I should have been able to stop both of those Pollicles but I neglected one and it came after you both. I mean, what if it was you it had grabbed onto? I don't think I could stand losing you"

"Well…sometimes these things just happen. It's all down to chance and it just so happened that the Pollicle picked Bomba. I guess we just have to look to the positives if we can; at least she's still alive"

Tugger sighed,

"I just wish I could have been there to defend you both. I'll always step up to keep you from harm and her…well, she was carrying kittens. Even though she's not my favourite cat by any means she was still pregnant and it wouldn't have mattered if they were mine or not, I still should have been there to stop them from being killed…I just feel so guilty"

Misto closed his eyes solemnly and tried to fight his own guilt as it cropped inside him once more. Again he thought about how his slow reaction may have contributed to the kittens' death and he wondered if he should tell Tugger so some of the strain could be taken off of him. He hated seeing his mate so upset, wouldn't it be good to ease some of the pressure? Then again, would Tugger react angrily? What if he saw him as the one that was responsible for the kittens dying? The tables would be turned and then it would be he that would have to try and win back Tugger's affections.

The puzzling thoughts made Misto look away slightly with an expression that Tugger perceived as upset. Naturally he assumed it was what he had been saying that had made his mate look like he was feeling neglected and second-best and he really didn't want him to feel like that. Trying to make Misto his main concern he turned his body slightly so he had better use of his arms and reached up to draw him closer. Misto looked down at him without changing his expression and the two looked into each other's eyes for a moment before Tugger spoke,

"I'm sorry, babe. I don't want you to have to deal with this. You're more important to me than all of this and all I'm really concerned about is you and how you're feeling"

"It's alright, Tug. You don't have to worry about me right now"

"Yes, I do. You're all that I want in my life and now that…everything else is gone I'm free to devote myself entirely to you."

"But, Tug, you can't just sweep this under the carpet and be done with it. It's gonna be painful for a while but hopefully we can get through it together. I'll be here for you to do whatever you need, darling. I'll be here because I love you and I want to help you"

Tugger felt even guiltier. How was it that despite everything he'd been through Misto was still thinking more about him than he was of himself? In Tugger's heart he knew it wasn't fair on the tux and what he had to do now was clear. He had to prove to the tux that he was all that mattered and in a flurry of thought he tried to think of what he could do to prove it to him as well as himself.

As he tried to lean up from the bed a sharp pain shot through his abdomen. He groaned as he felt it and stopped trying to sit up as soon as he did so. Misto was a little startled at first but then became confused as to why his mate was acting so strangely. Tugger had placed his paw on his stomach as if it were aching but wasn't rubbing. As he held it there the blanket that covered him started to gain a reddish tinge and the pair looked down feeling quite worried over what it meant. Misto reached down to Tugger's paw and gently pried it away so he could see. Pulling back the cover he gasped when he saw a large patch of red covering Tugger's stomach and became quite confused since he knew he'd cleaned him there much better than how he looked now.

When he looked a little closer though he found the answer he was looking for. A small area seemed to glisten a little more than that around it and upon closer inspection he could see the clear marks of teeth on Tugger's body. He had been so covered in blood earlier he hadn't realised that any of it might have been from any of his own injuries. He hadn't even noticed any when he'd been cleaning and he felt rather foolish since he hadn't been checking.

"Tugger, I'm sorry, I didn't realise," he said quietly as he examined the cuts.

"It's okay," said the bigger tom, "I should have said something"

Misto looked up at him,

"Has it been hurting all this time?"

"Not really. I guess I thought it was just aching from the fight but…I guess not"

"Let me fix you up" said Misto as he got off of the bed and walked over to the other side of the den. He fumbled through a few of their possessions for a few moments before he turned around and came back carrying an assortment of bandages. "I'm gonna need you to sit up" he said gently as he sat back down and reached out to help his mate. Tugger winced as he forced his muscles to cooperate and gasped when he felt the stinging become stronger.

"Does it hurt a lot?" asked Misto worriedly

"It's okay" strained Tugger, "I'll be fine"

"Are you sure? I'm sure Jenny has some painkillers if you need them"

Tugger thought for a moment but then shook his head,

"Nah, I'll be okay"

Misto just nodded and then set to work wrapping up his mate's abdomen with bandages. He was slow at first so as not to hurt him any more than he needed to and then continued to go faster as the layers mounted up. Tugger continued to wince here and there but on the whole he was just grateful for what Misto was doing for him. It didn't make him feel any less guilt for being cared for however and it only made him want to show the tux all the more that he was more important.

When Misto had finished he gathered all the bandages he hadn't used into his paws and started to get up to put them back. Tugger reached out and grabbed his arm before he could get away and then pulled him back onto the bed making him drop all the bandages. Misto looked a little surprised at the sudden gesture but was confused even more when Tugger pulled him against his body and kissed him hard. The tux blinked his eyes for a moment but then instinctively closed them as Tugger massaged his lips with his own. It felt nice to be so intimate even considering what was going on around them and the tux – forgetting himself for a moment – put his arms around Tugger's neck and kissed back with the same passion. If there was one thing Tugger knew how to do even in a time of crisis it was kiss and be sexy and at that moment he innately radiated all of the characteristics that had caused him to acquire his reputation.

A few moments later they parted and rested their foreheads together as they breathed heavily with their eyes lidded and their arms around each other.

"What was that for?" asked Misto dreamily as he basked in the buzz the kiss had given him.

"I want to show you how much I appreciate you doing all this for me. It's not fair that you should be trying to take care of me when I should be taking care of you"

Misto nuzzled him affectionately with a gentle smile for a second or two before he replied,

"But I love you and you need caring for, you big, silly pussycat"

"I can still do this though," said Tugger as he pressed their lips together again and grabbed Misto's rear. This time it didn't go quite as according to plan as he had hoped though as flashes of what was going on around him sped through his mind making him lose confidence slightly and falter in his kissing. Misto knew Tugger well enough to know the meaning of what he felt and knew Tugger's heart wasn't in what he was trying to do. He certainly was a silly Coon at times and he should have known that being sexy could not solve all of life's problems – regardless of how much he tried.

"Tugger, come on, I know you're not really up for kissing right now" said Misto as he leant away and gave his mate a happy but knowing look. Tugger wasn't about to allow himself to believe it though and forced himself to press on,

"Nope, I'm fine. Let me show you"

He went to kiss Misto again but before he reached him he winced when his wounds protested. Misto saw his change in expression before their lips met for a third time and cut it off moments after it started.

"Tugger, please. We can do this when things are better"

"No, now" said Tugger more forcefully, "I'm fine"

"You are not, I can see that"

"You're wrong. Let me do this for you, I want to show you how much I love you"

"I know how much you love me, you don't need to prove it"

"Let me do it anyway"

"But you're hurt, you'll only hurt yourself more"

"I'll be okay, it's nothing serious"

Misto paused for a moment before he carried on,

"I don't mean just physically though" he said gently, "I know you're hurting on the inside too"

He was right, Tugger knew that. He knew it to be incredibly true but he just didn't want to believe it. Of course he was sad that Bomba's kittens had died and he was made even more sad since he didn't know how connected he felt to them despite being biologically his. Sure, he felt some kind of connection but it wasn't clear how strong. Even so, they were not important anymore – another lie to himself – and in any case Misto was whom he had to concentrate on.

Trying to ignore the pain he forced himself upwards, grabbed Misto by the hips and pushed him down onto the bed so the tux was underneath him. Without waiting he lowered himself over him and kept kissing him passionately but with a distinctive hesitation that was all too clear.

Misto didn't know what to do. On the one paw he loved being able to do this with Tugger again and he had missed it for so long but on the other paw he knew Tugger wasn't thinking properly. In the end the latter won over and he knew he had to stop his mate from trying. He'd soon see that Tugger's body would do that for him.

"Tugger, stop. Let's just wait until you're better"

"I'm fine now," said Tugger firmly, "Let me do this for you"

"But you're not fine, darling, I can see that. You just lost your kittens and I know you're cut up by it"

"They weren't my kittens," said Tugger as he tried to make himself completely believe it, "They were a couple of bastards that were accidents, that's all"

"I know you don't believe that, Tug. Come on, you don't have to"

"Misto, please!" said Tugger more loudly and paused leaving an awkward silence between them for a few seconds. As the tension lingered it was eventually broken when he quietly said, "I need it. I need to forget for a while and I need to be close to you"

Misto was surprised. He knew Tugger was in a bad place but he didn't know he was that desperate to escape, let alone wanting to use sex to try and black out the memory. How could he say no now? He wanted to help his mate and he was asking for this to help him do it.

Despite feeling conflicted he eventually nodded gently and replied in the same fashion,

"Alright, Tug, whatever you need…"

That was all Tugger needed to hear. Straight away he leant forward and mashed his lips against Misto's again before quickly opening them up and exploring his mate's mouth with his tongue. Expertly he used it to make Misto melt in his grasp and it wasn't long before the tux wrapped his arms around Tugger's neck and gripped his fur as he lost himself in the passion. Tugger felt a little better when he felt the smaller tom respond so well but he still couldn't shake the nag at the back of his mind telling him that he really did care about everything that had happened. Still trying to crush it he only kissed harder and ran his paws over his mate's body trying to lose himself in the moment and at the same time giving Misto shivers. It wasn't working though and despite Misto seeming to go along with it he couldn't get his own body to react in the same way. Nothing was going right and it frustrated him to no end.

Grabbing Misto by the shoulder's he pushed him down into the bed and kissed him even more fiercely hoping that by becoming more animalistic he might be able to find the right mindset. It was a little surprising for Misto but he just went along with whatever Tugger was doing, after all he said he needed it and he didn't want to deprive him. Trying to mimic the actions, the tux used his own tongue to dance with Tugger's and the heat of the moment rushed through his body making every single part of him tingle.

Despite how much Tugger tried and wished he could make love to Misto there was one very crucial thing that was stopping him from doing so. It shocked him when he realised that the vital part of his anatomy that he needed for sex wasn't responding and the fact that he'd never had this problem before was simply stunning as well as incredibly distressing. Pulling away from Misto he raised his body slightly and looked down to where his erection should have been. He was utterly gobsmacked to see himself not reacting to the heat of the moment he was in where as he could clearly see Misto was ready for it. The tux's apprehension seemed to have gone out of the window and the bigger tom could see he was at full attention and ready to be ravished. Why couldn't he be the same? There, lying beneath him was the sexiest cat he knew. Misto's sleek, beautiful yet masculine curves were enough to drive him crazy and they had never failed in making him hot. Now Misto was radiating sex as he lay there panting and waiting hungrily and his very being at that moment Tugger knew should have been enough to drive him wild. In his heart he knew he wanted to drag Misto's legs up and give it to him as hard as he could. He needed it and by now was desperate for it. Why, then, was he not getting excited?

Reaching down Tugger grabbed himself and rummaged firmly to try and wake himself up. In the confusion Misto looked down as well and saw what Tugger was doing and he too puzzled over the strange display.

"Tug, are you okay?"

"Just give me a second" the bigger tom said in frustration and worked even harder to try and get himself to react. As the seconds ticked by with nothing happening he groaned angrily and pulled away from Misto to sit on the side of the bed and try to work himself up. Misto watched as his mate handled himself angrily and he too became a little distressed.

"Tugger, stop" he said as he reached over to the bigger tom, "It's alright"

"Just give me a fucking moment!" said Tugger furiously as he tried one last time to kick-start his libido. A few silent moments passed with still nothing happening and in an angry outburst Tugger jumped up and stormed towards the doorway. Misto could see he was upset and quickly followed before grabbing him just as he was about to leave the den altogether in shame.

"Let go of me, Misto!" he spat when he felt the smaller tom latch onto him and tried to shake him away.

"Tugger, calm down!" said Misto with a noticeable urgency

"I just want to get out of here, let me go!"

"No. Come and sit down"

"I said get off!" shouted Tugger shaking Misto wildly and nearly throwing him down. The smaller tom held on fiercely however and just gripped Tugger tighter when he tried to dislodge him. He could see clearly now that Tugger really wasn't in a good place and he had to do something to stop him from disappearing and working himself into only a deeper sorrow. In a flash he grabbed Tugger's shoulder, spun him around to face him and then gripped his head in his paws so he could look directly into his eyes,

"Tugger, stop it! It's okay! I know you're having trouble coming to terms with all of this and I know that you just don't want to believe it! It happened though, Tugger, and nobody can take it back so you're just going to have to try and deal with it! I'll be here for you, darling, please just let me help you through this and know that you don't have to try and protect me. Let me protect you for once in our lives"

Tugger just closed his eyes and fought back tears as Misto continued to hold his head. He felt so embarrassed for having tried to have sex with Misto when he knew in his heart that he just couldn't. He was even more embarrassed by making himself look such a fool and having to be told how he really felt when he couldn't admit it to himself. How could it be that Misto - after having been through everything that he had done – was the stronger one here? It didn't seem right or fair and Tugger felt so ashamed.

He weakly tried to pull away again and shakily said,

"Please just let me go"

Misto simply shook his head and pulled Tugger into the tightest hug he could manage,

"Not on your life. I'm the one that runs away, remember? I'm not about to let you do the same"

As he stood there in Misto's arms Tugger felt his legs grow weaker and a few moments later he dropped to his knees with the smaller tom continuing to hold him close. As he knelt he began to sob again and cried into Misto's fur as he was comforted. The two remained there for a little while before Tugger eventually managed to say,

"I don't know what to do, Misto…"

The tux simply kissed him on the top of his head and replied,

"I know, Tugger, but I'll help you."

They were silent for a little while until Misto managed to pick Tugger up and walk him over to their bed. He held him as they lay down together and watched as he gently drifted off to sleep. There they lay for the rest of the afternoon with the smaller tom cradling his mate. It was a sad day for both of them and they both knew in their hearts that they wanted to be with nobody else at that time. They still loved each other and through all of the hurt and the pain they were comforted to know that they still had that left.

**So Misto gave Tugger a tongue-bath, huh? I hope I didn't make it sound creepy, I just kinda figured that they're cats and that's what cats do. I tried to make it sound cute but if it was in fact weird then let me know and I'll know to write scenes like that better in the future. **

**Also, almost sexytimes for Tugger and Misto. Shame Tugger couldn't get it going, it might have worked out really hot. Oh well, maybe when he comes to terms with things and moves on they'll have a good old roll in the hay.**

**Next chapter soon and thanks again for all your spectacular reviews last time. Here's hoping this chapter was worthy of similar ones.**


	18. Rabbits And Roundabouts

**The other day I wasn't able to stop picturing Tugger singing Walk This Way by Aerosmith. It seems very him.**

**Kittendragon: Yeah, I forgot to write about Misto still having blood on him. I guess it didn't fit the flow at the time so I guess it can be assumed that a cat with his level of hygiene and the fact that he was grossed out by the blood on Tugger means that at some point between the end of the last chapter and the beginning of this one he got it off. Anything to stop himself from barfing again! Lol.**

**Anyway, new chapter! As I write this introduction I haven't actually written the chapter itself so who knows what's in store? Yes, I probably should have a plan but nah, I'll make it up as I go along!**

**NB: I don't know if this happens anywhere else but in Britain when you're driving along and come to a roundabout you sometimes see rabbits living on it. I don't know if that sounds strange or not but it's quite common in this country and I just wanted to explain so when you get to the right part it doesn't sound totally confusing. **

**Also, sorry this one took nearly two weeks. I've been far too busy!**

**Love Is No Fairytale**

**Chapter 18**

**Rabbits On Roundabouts**

Another dawn broke across the junkyard and as the sun penetrated through the early morning mist the blanket of darkness hiding the evidence of the mayhem that occurred two nights beforehand was lifted. Mangled pieces of junk still littered the floor of the clearing and at several points the mounds had disintegrated and fallen down into it. Blood still stained the earth where fighting had ensued and in the eerie stillness a certain feeling of fear and nervousness hung in the air. It was as if the arrival of the Pollicles had been a ghost that had swooped down upon them and disappeared all of a sudden. The feeling was such that the ghost could pop out again at any moment and still it left a haunting air in the junkyard. Those who were normally so confident were either recovering or resting from their ordeal and those who had been whisked away were not made to feel any more brave by their absence. The previous night had seen no activity of any kind which was a rare occurrence for the Jellicles and not an experience that any one of them found at all settling. There was good reason though; everyone had heard of Bomba's loss and it had taken the life out of all of them. Neither had it been long before the body of the Pollicle that had attacked her had been found and the burn marks from Misto's assault been seen. It hadn't taken Tumblebrutus and Pouncival long to work out that the burns all over it could only have come from magic and it had been a chilling experience for both of them. They'd never seen anything dead before and neither one had known what to do. Needless to say they had hurried back and soon the rumour of how it had ended up that way had spread through the tribe. Inside dens, cats quietly spoke of the terrible mess that their home had ended up in and the awful result of the two nights previous' invasion. It would surely leave a mark on all of them for a very long time and the worst part of it all was the lack of information they were receiving. There was still no word on Bomba nor was Munk or Alonzo watching out for them. Everything was topsy-turvy and the few cats that had escaped the fighting found it very difficult to carry on. They needed direction but as of yet it was not available. All they could do was wait and pray that in some way things would get better, but how likely was it that it would happen any time soon?

* * *

Inside the den of the Old Gumbie Cat, Skimble lay on his bed while watching his mate sleep. Even while she rested she looked exhausted and the dark circles under her closed eyes along with a greyish appearance showed this off most of all. Almost every moment she was awake she was tending to Bomba and keeping a careful eye on her and when she wasn't doing that she was occupied with the kittens and making sure they were looked after. Jelly helped as much as she could but no one had been working harder than Jenny. The tabby queen was so incredibly drained and with each passing hour she found it more and more difficult to concentrate. This all culminated in her being brought to bed by Skimble when he had seen her falling asleep as she tried to work and there they had been all night. Now as another day was beginning he watched his mate sleep heavily next to him and as he saw her breathe he smiled weakly down and gently rubbed the fur on her arm. He knew she cared about the tribe far more than anyone else, even to the point that it was detrimental to herself. She always worked so hard to keep everyone well but it surely took its toll on her. The fact that she barely ever got a break only added weight to that and it made Skimble feel incredibly guilty when he had to go off to work on the railway. He hated leaving her alone because he knew that once she had sorted everyone out they all had someone else to be with. When he was not there she had no one to hold onto and it hurt Skimble when he was away to think of her sitting alone in their den waiting for the next day's chaos to begin. Even so, she never complained. That was what made him appreciate her even more. She never asked for anything in return and Skimble felt truly honoured to be mated to such a selfless, loving cat. He'd have to try and think how to make it up to her somehow, everyone deserved recognition for how much they gave and no one deserved it more than she.

* * *

Across the clearing still within the sinister silence of the early morning, Munkustrap lay awake staring straight up at the ceiling of his den. In the dimness of his home he thought to himself solemnly as he lay with Demeter pressed up alongside his body with her arm draped across his chest. Gently she breathed against the fur on his neck and as he thought he felt the warm flow of air of her breathing move in and out of her nose. It gave his thoughts a kind of subconscious rhythm which he barely noticed but helped him to think through the mountain of stress he had stored up inside himself. He hadn't been outside since he had been in his mate's prison-like care but if it was anything like the way he had last seen it then he knew there was a lot of work to be done. He supposed that without him there to direct it that nothing was changing and he closed his eyes as he tried to enjoy the last few moments of calmness before the day properly began. Maybe today Demeter would lessen her restrictions and allow him to leave the den in order to survey and plan the cleanup operation. He knew he needed to try and restore some morale in the tribe since he could already sense that spirits were low. Somehow he would have to turn the tribe's sentiments around but that seemed to be a massive job from his point of view. The death of anyone was enough to leave everyone in a state of despair for a few days but the death of kittens was unthinkable. Something like that could destroy a tribe's spirit and the silver tabby knew that it wasn't beyond the limits of the Jellicles. It worried him and he couldn't shake the question of whether the task was too big for him. He was meant to be the protector but how was he meant to repair the emotions of all the cats he was charged with?

* * *

Misto gently opened his eyes and looked out into his den. They tickled a little as he adjusted to the dim light that emanated in from the outside. A few moments later he closed them again and enjoyed the darkness it brought to him. He loved to savour the quietness and the stillness of the early morning and as he lay there he slowly started to feel his senses come back to life. With his eyes still closed he began to notice the large, warm, furry mass of Tugger in his arms and then the gentle expansions and contractions of his breathing. It felt wonderful to have him there and Misto was reminded of how much he used to enjoy that feeling. To wake up and be next to Tugger and to bask in the warm confines of the comfort he provided was unimaginably beautiful and it always made the tux's heart sing. There were few things in life that made the smaller tom feel truly amazing and the first few moments of the morning were one of them. Right now it felt different though, they had switched positions and it was Misto holding Tugger instead of the other way around. He wondered how strange it must have looked if someone were to see them with the smaller size of himself holding the larger size of Tugger. He didn't really care though and as his thoughts went on he was reminded of exactly why they were holding each other in such a configuration.

Keeping his eyes closed, Misto pulled Tugger even closer and snuggled up to him as tightly as he could. He didn't know how long it would be before Tugger stirred but he didn't want to lose this feeling any sooner than he had to. Then again, he probably needn't have worried. Tugger was certainly the type to sleep late into the morning and given what he'd been through recently Misto didn't expect that his sleeping time would be in any way reduced. If anything he'd probably sleep even longer since that was a very Tuggerish thing to do. After a few moments of contemplation Misto reduced his clutches on him just a little bit and looked down to the big, maneless tom.

He took a few moments to take in how magnificent Tugger looked even without his mane although that was starting to show signs of a glorious return. Misto chuckled internally when he thought that Tugger must have had some kind of built-in genetic contingency response that could sense if his outward appearance was diminished and that in such a case his body would direct all of its energy to fixing it. Maybe that was the reason he was sleeping so much; could it be that his vanity dictated his life in truly every way?

Misto simply smiled to himself and replaced his head against his lover's. It really did feel nice to be kept warm by him and the softness of his fur only added to that. It was true that Misto's fur was softer but Tugger was still incredibly cuddly when it came to that. It was then that Misto wondered why it was said that the Rum Tum Tugger didn't care for a cuddle. They always sung it during the ball but in his experience it didn't seem to be all that true. Some days it seemed he wanted to do nothing else but find a quiet spot and snuggle up together, especially in the summer when the sun shone down brightly and could warm their dark fur. Maybe Misto was just special, after all there was a long line of nameless lovers Tugger had dumped in the past that he certainly hadn't 'cuddled' with. Misto just felt gladder that he had been granted such a special privilege over so many other cats and even went as far as feeling a little smug.

A few more long moments passed in silence before Misto became fully awake and started to feel like he ought to get up. Despite wanting to care for Tugger he was itching to get out and have a bash at doing some magic tricks again. He desperately wanted to see if he could still do everything he used to be able to but up until now had been occupied with Tugger. Maybe he could get up now and find somewhere quiet. He was pretty sure no one was up yet so now would be the perfect time not to be bothered.

Very delicately he started to untangle himself from the pile of cat he was a part of and in one swift but gentle motion he pulled himself out from underneath Tugger and stepped off of the bed lightly. Once he was up he stretched out as far as he could and yawned widely in a very stereotypically feline fashion. He then turned and looked back at Tugger who lay in the same position he had been a moment ago only this time with his head flopped back and his mouth slightly open. Misto smiled again and had to suppress a giggle at the sight. Tugger certainly was a messy sleeper and he looked incredibly comical with arms and legs splayed out every what way and which. Misto knew when his mane grew back he'd look even soppier since it would most certainly be mashed out of shape overnight. He looked forward to playfully teasing Tugger since he'd most certainly spend a ridiculous amount of time in front of the mirror meticulously grooming every hair into the correct position. Not now though. Now he was off to do something for himself and he felt quite excited to actually have the chance to play with his magic again.

With a spring in his step he went over to the doorway and hopped out into the early morning mist. After yawning again he scanned around and took in the sight of the messy clearing. He was a little surprised that Munk hadn't ordered it to be cleaned up but it didn't bother him too much. Then again, it would nice if they could clear the remnants of the terrible mess they'd all been through a couple of nights ago and as he began to step down into the clearing he was only reminded of this fact more when he saw the spots of blood dotted over the clearing floor. It was not a pretty sight and Misto's high spirits were faltered for a moment as he stared at them.

He then got a brainwave and looked a little more closely at the blood. After a moment or two he then looked down at his paws and bit his lip cheekily. Maybe trying to get the blood off using his magic was a good place to start. After all, it was simple, it was quick and he certainly felt it was within his capability.

Quickly rubbing them together, he raised his paws, extended them out in front of him and drew some magic into them. Just as he was about to release he felt a twinge of nervousness spark within him but then the excitement got the better of it. In a flash he sent a spark of energy from each paw flying at the ground and jumped back when it impacted. Very tentatively he stepped forward and looked at the ground once the smoke had cleared and inspected his work. A big smile spread across his face when he saw a large patch of the bloodstain had vanished and even giggled a little when he felt incredibly pleased with himself. Extending his paws again he repeated the action and looked at the spot where he had shot the magic. Just like before the mess was gone and once he saw he was doing it properly he couldn't stop. Before long he was dancing around the clearing making the remnants of blood disappear and as the magic flowed through him he felt so incredibly good. It was the best feeling to be so in-tune with himself once more and he couldn't wait to try something bigger. More than that he was glad that this was some blood he didn't have to lick off and chuckled when he wondered if he could have done the same thing with Tugger. On second thought, the big tom probably wouldn't have liked being singed with magic just to get clean; after all, he'd only recently lost his mane, he couldn't possibly cope with losing the rest of his fur too.

When he'd finished zapping the last few specks Misto jumped up onto the junk at the side of the clearing and looked out to survey his work. The mist was a little thinner now and he could see that he'd done a bang up job. With a smile he enjoyed the feeling he received by being helpful and remembered back to his kittenhood when he'd done similar things simply for the approval of the grownup cats. Maybe he had been a bit of a suck-up at times but in the end it seemed worth it. After all, it only gave him practice for some of his more interesting magic tricks.

With that in mind Misto jumped down and tottered back to his den. He knew he had a pack of cards stashed away somewhere and was eager to see if he could manipulate them like the master he used to be. He was very careful not to make any noise as he went back in and quickly inspected Tugger from across the den to make sure he hadn't moved. When everything seemed all clear he started rummaging through his possessions and eventually came across the small, cardboard box containing the cards he used for his tricks. Getting them out he shuffled the pack and fanned them out in front of himself as he tried to decide what to do. A moment later he pushed them back together and started to shuffle them whilst looking at the ceiling so he couldn't see them. Every few seconds he would remove one of the cards and place it on the floor in front of himself and pretty soon he felt he had a long line of cards in front of him. When they were all placed down in a circle around himself he looked down and beamed when he found he had managed to place down all of the cards in the exact order of number and suit. So far so good so then, gathering them back up, he decided to try something a little trickier. He sat there for a few moments thinking as he remembered how to do his next trick and then when he felt confident enough he rubbed his paws together with the cards in between. Then, in a flash, he threw them all up into the air and used his magic to quickly stack them into a house as they all fluttered down.

As he directed the last card to its resting spot he stopped and stared at the perfect house of cards before him and smiled even wider than before. His magic was working, it really was! He could do his tricks again and it was seeing that he could that really made him feel confident. He could once again do the things that made him so special and it was all down to loving Tugger!

He stopped when that thought passed through his mind and replayed it with a more inquisitive expression. He had recently figured it out that it was taking Tugger back that had made his magic return and from where he sat he looked back across the den at the big, sleeping lump of cat that was his mate. In his heart he knew he probably shouldn't have been happy that only through Tugger could he have his magic again since he had never needed anyone before. He just didn't care though because he knew he was too in love to feel any other way. What's more he knew love did crazy things and made cats behave madly but he also knew that love didn't need to be rational or logical. Right at that moment he remembered something Tugger had said not too long ago, 'Love is no fairytale', and thought that truly there was nothing more correct. Love really wasn't the thing in stories that as kittens they were lead to believe, it was mysterious and strange and outright lunacy. Above all though it didn't matter, love could be those things and still somehow it was still right. That was what made Misto know he was truly lucky; he didn't have to understand love like he did his magic, he believed in it in his heart and that was good enough.

With a big smile he got up and padded over to Tugger and sat on the edge of the bed while watching him sleep. He sat there for a long time just looking at the bigger tom and wondered what on earth would become of them from that point on. He didn't feel worried though, after all there couldn't be anything worse to come that hadn't already happened. He felt quite calm in all honesty as he thought about it and knew that even if it took a long time their future would be bright. He believed in both himself and Tugger and knew that things would be okay.

More time passed and it wasn't long before Misto felt his stomach start to sing to him. As soon as he felt the first twinge the floodgates seemed to open and straight away he felt incredibly hungry. Thinking back it must have been a really long time since he'd last eaten – especially since he couldn't exactly remember when that was. He knew Tugger certainly hadn't eaten since all of the unpleasantness and decided that starving was something he could actually prevent. Once again he carefully removed himself from Tugger and once he was standing up wondered for a moment exactly how deep a sleep his mate must have been in. He'd gotten up twice now and still the lazy tom hadn't awoken.

'_What a lug'_ thought Misto casually before turning back around and leaving the den. When he was outside he was glad to see that the mist had cleared and rays of sunlight were beginning to bring life to the junkyard. It didn't seem so eerie anymore and Misto was glad to feel more at home – albeit in a rather disarrayed home. He hopped down happily from the junk outside his den and wondered what he ought to try and find for Tugger to eat. It seemed he really needed something to cheer him up and while Misto knew that food wasn't going to get him all of the way there it could at least give him a kick in the right direction. Thinking for a few moments more Misto suddenly had his second brainwave for that morning: rabbit. It wasn't often that they could find rabbit, let alone catch the wily creatures but today seemed like a time when the extra effort was required. Turning back to his thoughts Misto soon remembered a roundabout nearby which he had seen rabbits hopping around upon before. Immediately he set off towards the road upon which the roundabout was situated and along the way wondered why rabbits tended to live on them. It wasn't long before he figured out that it was probably the safest place since most cats wouldn't even try to cross the traffic to get to them. Not him though, he was clever and he wasn't about to let a few cars stand in the way of trying to make Tugger feel better.

* * *

A short while later Misto found himself staring across the road towards the roundabout he had come to. From there he couldn't see any rabbits hopping around but he knew they must have been there. Primarily he was concerned with getting across the road and fortunately for him there wasn't much traffic this early in the morning. Carefully he waited until he was sure nothing was coming and then darted as fast as he could across the tarmac. In a flash he was upon the roundabout and flew into the undergrowth that grew there. He remained in complete stillness for a few moments to make sure nothing had seen him and then started prowling through the tall vegetation looking for his prey. Hopefully it wouldn't be tool long before something came looking for food and he could snare it.

A long while passed with nothing happening and Misto wondered if he'd come to the right place. He was almost about to give up when he finally saw something moving around a short distance from where he was and he stooped low to avoid being seen. Very carefully he pushed through the tall grass and looked around for anything that could be seen. He was not disappointed for there, a short way in front of him, was one of the small, furry things he had been looking for nibbling on some grass. Misto had to bite his lip to stop himself from smiling too widely as well as hold his stomach gently to prevent it from groaning too loudly at the prospect of food.

He knew he had to choose the exact right moment or else it would see him and scarper. He'd come too far to lose his prize now and he knew Tugger would appreciate his effort. Keeping completely still he watched the poor creature eating and very slowly prepared himself to pounce. As he moved he made some of the grass around him quiver and it made the rabbit stop and look up defensively. Misto simply paused and remained stock still until it went back to what it was doing and once it had done so continued in his careful positioning. A few more silent seconds passed and Misto was ready. He flexed his claws and pushed his rear up into the air while keeping his tail low. He quickly pent up the energy in his legs and built up some tension which made his bottom wiggle in a way that was very characteristic of a cat ready to leap. He felt the adrenaline start to surge in his veins as he became ever closer to flying forward and with his eyes wide he waited for the exact moment when he could take his prey.

The rabbit, completely oblivious to its impending doom, continued to nibble happily at the grass in front of it and didn't notice the big, staring eyes of Misto from amongst the grass behind it. Without worrying it stuck out its neck to reach the next piece of grass it wished to eat and that was when Misto went for it. In a flash he pounced forward and flew across the grass towards the rabbit. The small creature barely had time to know what was happening before Misto jumped on top of it and junk his claws and teeth into its body. It squeaked in both surprise and terror at the first impact but it had no time to take a second breath. Misto clamped his jaws down around its neck and shook back and forth wildly until he could feel blood running down from the punctures his teeth had made. He kept biting down hard while the rabbit made desperate bids for freedom but it was too late. A few seconds more passed and the rabbit's jolts became weaker and weaker and pretty soon Misto felt it cease wriggling. He then gave one final, powerful clamp down of his jaw and was rewarded with an audible snap of the rabbit's neck. The tux had to try and stop himself from smiling so as not to let to rabbit go but he was too pleased with himself to be entirely effective. Soon he felt the rabbit grow cold and that was when he finally allowed himself to let go. The creature flopped to the ground and Misto stared down at it feeling quite smug. Due to his size he was never really that capable of bringing down anything much bigger than rats or mice yet there he was having managed to kill a rabbit. True, it was a rather small rabbit but it was still bigger than a rat and he was pleased that he had managed to get something that Tugger would like. The only problem now was getting it home; killing it was one thing but dragging it back to the junkyard was something else entirely.

Trying to summon back his strength, he clutched onto the rabbit's pelt and heaved it back in the direction that he came. He managed to pick it up but it was heavy for him and he only managed to get to the edge of the roundabout until he had to put it down. He stood there breathing heavily for a moment as he tried to become calm again and as he stood he looked across the road to where he needed to get. Sighing quietly he pulled the rabbit up again – this time using his mouth as well – and ran as quickly as he could across the road. It was more difficult this time since there was a little more traffic but he managed to get across unscathed.

Feeling like he was making good progress he started off in the direction of the junkyard and only struggled a little more than he had hoped he would.

* * *

About an hour passed and back inside his den Tugger cracked open his eyes and looked around his home. Straight away he groaned, closed his eyes again and buried his head under the pillow upon which it rested in protest to starting the day. He never really enjoyed getting up and always wished he could ride out the day in bed. Before falling in love with Misto there had been times when he'd done just that, much to the disappointment of his fan club. Such instances had grown less and less frequent since then although today seemed like one of those days when he could justify doing it. He just didn't feel like doing anything at all today and did his upmost to fall asleep again. As much as he tried though he was awake now and drifting off wasn't going to be so easy. He had been resting for a long time now and his body was telling him to get up and do something. His mind gave the opposite view and the tom was locked in a battle between the two. Neither one really seemed to be winning so in the end he simply lay awake in bed staring straight up at the ceiling with only his thoughts to keep him company. It wasn't long before he realised Misto wasn't there and foolishly looked around the den to see if he was nearby. He looked back and forth for any sign of his mate but nothing was there, nothing until he saw a strangely placed house of cards on the floor not too far from the bed. He didn't need any other sign but that, it alone was enough to tell him Misto had been up to his old tricks again and couldn't have been far away.

The big tom looked at the construction for a little while longer and smiled at it knowing it meant Misto was feeling more like normal. Then, as if on cue, he heard a rustling outside which soon developed into clattering and was then accompanied by some heavy panting and a few very mild expletives. The expletives themselves were so mild in fact that Tugger knew that no one else but Misto used them in the way that they were being uttered and simply laid back waiting for his mate to appear.

A few minutes later he still found himself waiting and had noticed that the clattering had stopped and was replaced with only the heavy breathing. Feeling curious he creakily pushed himself up off of the bed and groaned quietly as he lumbered across the den in a very over-dramatic way. He delicately looked out of the den down to the ground and as he craned his neck he saw his mate sitting on the junk and facing away from him while slightly hunched over.

"Babe?" he asked quietly hoping that everything was alright. Misto spun around quickly and looked at him with surprise having not heard him approach.

"Tug!" Misto startled, "Sorry, did I wake you up?"

"No, I was already awake"

"Oh, good"

"Are you alright?"

"Yes. Look what I got you for breakfast" said Misto gesturing down to the junkyard floor happily. Tugger stepped up and looked down to where he was pointing before becoming curious.

"Is that a rabbit?" he asked with a noticeable inquisitiveness

"Yep" said Misto happily and nodding a little excitedly.

Tugger just looked down at the dead creature for a moment with a humorous look on his face. He hadn't expected this at all and he wondered if Misto would ever cease to amaze him at times like these.

"How did you get it?" he eventually asked

"Well, I thought you might like something extra special what with everything that's been going on so…here you are"

Tugger simply shook his head in slight disbelief and looked over at Misto with a smile,

"You are too good for me"

Misto smiled and blushed a little,

"I am not"

"You are" said the bigger tom as he leaned over and kissed Misto lightly, "Come on, let's get it inside"

The two of them then set about dragging the rabbit back into their den. It was much easier with Tugger helping and it was quite clear that most of the effort was on his part. He was much stronger than Misto and lifting a rabbit was a much easier task for him. It only served to impress him more that Misto managed to catch it and bring it back all by himself and he knew he'd have to make it up to him somehow.

When they were comfortably inside again they set about skinning the rabbit and began to devour the meat on its body. Misto had to force Tugger to take the first taste since the Maine Coon was adamant that Misto ought to do so since it was he who had caught it but the tux didn't give in. The meat tasted utterly fantastic and the feeling it brought with it made Tugger feel great. It was so much better than having the regular, fairly boring rat they usually sufficed with and as they ate together Tugger watched the smaller tom as he neatly dined. He really didn't know how he was meant to show his appreciation for Misto, especially after everything that he had done for him. It was then that he was reminded of exactly what had gotten him so down and he was amazed to find that he had actually forgotten about it for that brief time. Misto's efforts to try and cheer him up really were working and he felt so grateful to him for having tried so hard. Then again, now that he remembered he wasn't sure that he was ready to feel okay about forgetting and he wondered if that made him a bad cat. It really confused him and he didn't know what he was meant to believe. There were so many things pulling on his emotions that he really did feel mixed up and it was moments like the one Misto had provided him with that he savoured. To not have to deal with all the nagging feelings and heartbreak was bliss and he really wished he could just remain that way where he could ignore all of the pain. It just wasn't that simple though, even he knew that and it only depressed him more than he cared to be.

As they became full the two sat there and contemplated and let the food settle within them. As they did so they chatted idly,

"I see you've been playing," said Tugger as cheerily as he could

"What?" asked Misto curiously.

"I noticed your house of cards"

"Oh" said Misto smiling, "Well, I thought I'd give it a go while you were still sleeping"

"Everything still up to scratch?"

"I'm not sure, I haven't tried anything too big yet"

"Do you think you could make Jemima appear in here?"

Misto chuckled, "She'd probably have the fright of her life"

"It'd be hilarious though, wouldn't it?"

"It might be but it wouldn't be fair"

"Oh come on, do it! Just for a laugh!" said Tugger with a more pleading tone

"Maybe later. For now I've just been trying the basics"

"And I trust they're working properly?"

"They seem to be"

"Good"

"So how are you feeling today?"

"Alright, I guess…I don't really know"

"What do you mean?"

"I'm trying not to feel really. I'm so bored with feeling one way one minute and then somehow different another. It's been going on for too long now and I can't be bothered anymore"

"What are you saying?"

Tugger sighed, "I'm saying that I just want to forget everything and start afresh, but I suppose that's too much to ask, isn't it?"

Misto was quiet for a moment, "I suppose…maybe. I guess some things you can't just ignore"

"Don't I know it…"

"I guess I'll just have to try harder then…" said Misto meekly making Tugger look up at him with a brash look.

"Now, you be quiet. You've done more than enough for me"

"But I haven't though, not really" said Misto taking Tugger's paw, "I put you through so much and I need to make it up to you somehow"

"But you deserved to put me through so much" said Tugger trying to sound reasonable

"I don't know about that. All I do know is that you need me now so I'll be here for you"

They shared a warming look for a few moments before Tugger managed to say,

"Thank you"

Misto gave him a nod and then flicked his eyes down in the silence. What they came to rest on gave him a little cause for concern,

"Have you tried to take off your bandages?"

"No" said Tugger questioningly as he looked down to where Misto was looking on his stomach. He could see that the bandages wrapped around him had become quite red again and really had done all they could for him for now. "Whoa. I didn't notice that"

"They need changing," said Misto as he started to get up

"Babe, it's okay. I'll get it done later"

"No, it's alright. I'll be back in a bit"

"Where are you going?" he asked as he watched Misto cross the den

"Jenny's. I'm out of bandages but I'm sure she's got tons"

"Well, let me go instead"

"It's alright. You just stay here and keep out of trouble"

Before Tugger could respond Misto was gone and he was left alone on the floor of the den with only the stripped rabbit carcass to keep him company. He looked down at the messy thing and chuckled slightly before speaking to it,

"I bet my life is still worse than yours right now"

* * *

Jenny, true to her pseudonym, sat at the edge of her den simply watching Bomba across from her and waiting for any sign of being needed. The red queen hadn't done much since she'd been in her care and most of her time she spent simply lying in her bed without moving and breathing lightly. Clearly she had been traumatized by her ordeal and it wasn't going to be easy to bring her around. Jenny knew there was very little she could do for her until she was ready to talk properly about what had happened and there was no sense in rushing that.

As Jenny continued to watch, Skimble came in from another part of the den. He had brushed himself up quite nicely and everything about him said authority. With a sympathetic smile he looked down at his mate who looked back at him and responded with the same expression.

"Are you going to be okay while I'm gone?" Skimble asked the tabby queen cautiously

"As well as I always am" she responded lightly

"You know, I don't have to go. I can stay if you want"

"It's alright, dear, I'll be fine here. I've got Jelly and everyone else so you don't need to worry"

"I will though" said the ginger tom as he bent down to hug her, "I always do whenever I have to go to work"

"You are a soppy thing," she said as they parted, "Go on, everything will be fine here"

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, now go on" she said and got up to shoo him out.

"Alright. I'll see you in a couple of days"

"Okay, bye Skimble"

"Bye" he said before kissing her and leaving to go and work on the railway. As he left, Jenny watched him go and sighed gently. She never really liked to see him go but she knew he'd be back soon so it didn't really matter.

Turning back she refocused on Bomba and placed her paws on her hips as she thought.

"What are we going to do with you then?" she said quietly hoping it might earn some kind of response from her patient. It didn't so she simply shook her head and went over to her to inspect for anything that might be wrong. Reaching down she gently placed her paw on Bomba and rubbed her fur softly. The red queen didn't even bat and eyelid at the contact and simply remained staring at thin air. She lay with her head facing to her right and it was clear that she was lost in thought. She knew it must have been awful for her to have to live with the horror that was miscarrying not one but two kittens and she really hoped that in time she'd be able to cope with it. She'd never be able to live it down but hopefully she could eventually come to accept it.

"Are you hungry at all, dear?" Jenny asked

Bomba replied very softly, "No"

"Is there anything I can get for you?"

"No" she said again. There was a short pause as Jenny wondered what else she could say. Eventually it came,

"Are you hurting at all? Do you need any painkillers?"

Bomba thought for a moment and then closed her eyes,

"I don't know"

Jenny nodded solemnly,

"Alright. Let me know if you need anything, dear"

As she walked away she heard Bomba whisper, Thank you" and simply gave her a warm smile in return. It wasn't out of place for Bomba to be courteous but she never had been this vulnerable and Jenny hoped she'd be able to regain some of her sass eventually. It didn't seem right for her to be so quiet and meek and it was almost unsettling. Still, there was no use in rushing things so Jenny simply went back to her sitting. She was managing to regain some of her energy now and she felt much better for it. Jelly would be along soon to relieve her anyway so she didn't need to worry too much about becoming exhausted again.

A few minutes later her attention was grabbed by soft footfalls on the junk outside her den that she knew could only be produced by one particular cat. She looked up just in time to see Misto drop into her den with a pleasant smile on his face and in a very kittenish way hopped across to her.

"Hello" he said cheerily

"Hello, Misto" replied Jenny, "What can I do for you?"

"I was wondering if you might have any spare bandages that I could use for Tugger. He 'forgot' that he had a couple of scratches and I'm afraid I don't have anymore to wrap him up"

He didn't notice but as soon as Misto mentioned Tugger Bomba raised her head and looked over to him curious to hear that he was injured too.

"Oh no, are they bad? He really ought to have come and see me," said Jenny as she rolled her eyes knowingly

"Not terrible but they can't stand not to be dressed"

"Why don't you send him here, dear? I don't mind"

"I know, but he doesn't even want me to make a fuss. You know he's stubborn as a mule"

"I'm sure you could get him here. It would be you asking after all"

"Yeah, I know. But I don't really want to make him do anything he doesn't want to at the moment. He's a little fragile too"

Jenny sighed and got up to rummage through her stacks of bits and bobs. As she went she muttered things about Tugger being lazy and a good-for-nothing but Misto couldn't quite hear her. Even so he didn't really care, he was more concentrated on getting back to Tugger and fixing him up.

As his mind wandered he began to look around the den airily and began to hum quietly to himself as he did so. He scanned his eyes slowly not really looking at anything in particular but it was then that he saw Bomba staring back at him intently. Straight away he stopped humming and widened his eyes. He didn't understand it but he was instantly frozen in the spot he was standing and for a moment stopped breathing as well. The two simply remained staring at each other for a few moments before Bomba managed to squeak something out,

"Misto…" she said quietly

The tux didn't respond, he simply stared at her with an apparent expression of shock. Bomba saw his wide eyes and noticed the prolonged silence between them. The way he stared made her feel incredibly nervous and she didn't understand that Misto shared those nerves. He didn't know why but he was still scared of her and still saw her as a threat. Bomba was simply stuck for knowing how to feel and the way in which Misto looked at her with such fixation and with such an empty glare soon made her come to the conclusion that Misto still hated her for what had happened and she wanted nothing more at that moment than for the earth to swallow her up. She had wondered if Misto had hated her during the recent weeks and in all fairness she wouldn't have blamed him but for some reason it now seemed like a much bigger deal than it had before. She didn't want to be hated by him, she didn't want to be hated by anyone and it jabbed at her to think that someone in their tribe utterly loathed her for both what she had done and for what she was.

Misto was simply awestruck. He didn't know how he felt about Bomba anymore but to see her there looking so terrible and frightened was one of the most curious sights he'd ever thought he'd seen. How could it be that the queen that had seemed so powerful and threatening to his happiness now seemed so meek and scared? It didn't seem right and he just didn't know how to feel about it. He wanted to understand but he just couldn't and he wished he could make all of this go away. It was then that something else overcame him and that was a strange feeling of sympathy. For some reason he actually had pity for her and he actually felt that she didn't deserve what she had been through. It was true that she had played a major part in once again screwing up his life but weirdly he actually wished that the things that had happened to her had not. What kind of messed up feelings were these?

More time went by where neither of them said anything and this only served to make the tension thicker. Both of them felt like they wanted to die and it wasn't until Jenny came back with a bundle of bandages that the tension was dashed.

"Here you are, dear. This should fix him up for a day or two" said Jenny as she handed Misto the things he had asked for. "Are you alright, dear?" she asked when she saw him looking as if he had seen a ghost. Misto quickly closed his eyes and shook his head briefly before looking back at her and then attempted to form words,

"I…" he began but didn't say anything after that. Once a few seconds had gone by he turned quickly and ran leaving Jenny very confused and a little put out, after all it wouldn't have killed him to say thank you.

"He hates me" came a voice from across the den and Jenny turned to look over at Bomba. The red queen was still propped up in the position she had been in a moment ago and was looking out towards where Misto had been. It seemed as though she had been stuck there briefly while she tried to process the magnitude of Misto's reaction to her state. Sure enough, a few moments later, she closed her eyes once more and laid her head down on the pillow beneath it as she tried to deal with the assumption that she was disliked to such a degree that she didn't think she could look him in the eye anymore. She had known that what she'd done was wrong but it wasn't until now that she felt truly responsible. Before, she had considered it some kind of accident but to see Misto look so stuck really made her feel that she was to blame for causing him so much hurt. Maybe her losing her kittens and feeling completely empty was punishment for that and she wondered if maybe all of what had happened was simply the universe punishing her. In her eyes it now seemed like she deserved it and for the first time in her life she actually felt like a bad cat. She alone had caused so much pain and suffering to one of the nicest, sweetest cats in existence who had never deserved to be treated as he had and even now he was still reeling from her intervention. What kind of terrible queen was she? Furthermore, how could she consider herself a victim anymore? Surely this was an appropriate punishment.

Feeling like a truly dreadful creature Bomba simply laid her head back and felt tears accumulate behind her eyes. Things seemed to make sense now but she hated it. She had never thought she was a bad cat but it seemed that what she had done had come back and bitten her. She had been bad and now she was experiencing the consequences. How could she not have realised the magnitude of what she'd done at the time of doing it?

* * *

Later on, Misto found himself undressing Tugger's bandages and setting about putting new ones back on. As he began to wind the thin strips of gauze around his mate he was much less chatty than usual and it was to such an extent that Tugger picked up on it.

"Hey babe" he began, "Is something up?"

Misto was quiet for a few moments before he stopped dressing Tugger's wounds and looked away. Very gently he replied,

"If a cat does something bad to you but then something even worse happens to them and you feel sorry for them should you tell them so?"

Tugger was a little taken aback at that and wondered what one earth his mate was talking about.

"What?"

"If a cat hurts you but they get their comeuppance, should you tell them you feel sorry for them?"

"I don't understand," said Tugger as he tried to make sense of Misto's strange, philosophical ramblings.

"It's alright, never mind" said Misto as he attempted to go back to his work but now that it was on his mind he found it difficult to concentrate. He lost the pattern he was trying to work around Tugger and in the end found it impossible to carry on. With a frustrated sigh he paused for a moment and within it Tugger spoke again having had a short amount of time to think,

"I guess. I mean, if you feel justice has been served…and…you know…"

Misto looked up at him, "But I don't know if it counts as justice, I just wonder if maybe I should tell her I feel bad for her"

"Her?"

Misto kicked himself internally, "I mean them. Should I tell them that I feel bad for them if I do?"

Tugger thought for a moment and then responded as best he could,

"I guess so. If you think it's the right thing to do…I mean, if you feel a cat's down on their luck then it's only right to tell them that you're thinking of them, isn't it?"

Misto looked back down and sighed,

"I guess so"

Tugger watched him think and wondered if he'd said the right thing. In all honesty he had no clue what Misto was talking about and wondered if he had gone loopy again. He hoped not, after all if he had then they'd barely make up one healthy cat between them, they couldn't last with both of them being in some way incapacitated.

* * *

When night came Misto remained awake and stared out into the darkness. He could see fairly well but he wasn't looking at anything in particular, he was still thinking about Bomba and how he felt about her. He knew he still felt scared, annoyed and angry with her but now he also felt pity and sadness. What was he meant to believe? Was one meant to counteract the other? He wasn't sure and as a result he continued to lie there trying to figure out his feelings.

He wasn't sure how long had passed before he straightened himself up, expertly got off of the bed where Tugger was sleeping without waking him and paced across the den. From there he pulled out a scrap of paper and a pen he had tucked away and began to write down everything that was in his head. He was fortunate since he was one of the few cats in the junkyard that could actually read and write and as he scratched away he felt as if his thoughts were becoming clearer as they were put down on the page before him. It took him a while since it was difficult for a cat to manoeuvre such a large object like a pen with dexterity but as he took his time he managed to record the thoughts in his head fairly clearly.

As the minutes ticked by he went through a strange journey of emotions as he bore his heart down onto the page and he found himself both revelling in the relief that was brought to him but also drowning in the pain and sorrow that was churned up that he thought he'd put behind him. It even came to the point when a few sparkling tears dripped down onto the page and soaked into the paper leaving their prominent marks.

When he was done he read it all back to himself and feeling as if it were appropriate he gave a single nod and folded the page in half. On the outside he simply wrote 'Bomba' and then proceeded to leave the den and place the folded page outside Jenny's den. Someone would be sure to see it and hopefully they'd find someone else that could read it to her. He so desperately wished he could talk to her face to face but he knew in his heart that he wasn't ready yet. Hopefully this way he'd manage to get through to her and maybe, just maybe they'd be able to start making progress in getting back to normal. It was a long shot but in the end what else was there to hope for?

* * *

The next day Munk awoke with determination in his eyes. He couldn't be stuck indoors anymore, he needed to get out and start doing the things he was used to doing once more. Many times he had become stir crazy as he lay on his bed or paced around his den hoping for even a glimmer of mental stimulation. Most of those times it hadn't come though and in the end he had just needed to accept it and try to distract himself by some other means. That had certainly proved more difficult than simply thinking it though and that was why on this day he was determined to get outside again.

He waited patiently until the sun had risen high enough that the junkyard was bathed in bright morning light and that was when he started to gently push himself up and off of the bed. Demeter who slept next to him was awake in a flash despite his efforts not to disturb her and in a sleepy haze she looked over at him and formed some bleary words,

"Where are you going?"

"Good morning to you too, dear" said Munk feeling a little put out that she had jumped straight to the point as soon as she had woken up.

"What's going on?" the queen asked as she rubbed her eyes thoroughly and yawned widely

"I'm going outside. I've been in here for too long"

"I don't think so," she said more authoritatively as she was jolted into clearer thought by what Munk had said

"Well, I do. I've been in here for days, darling, I need to get out"

"It's only been a couple of days and as far as I'm concerned you're still not fit enough to go back to doing your normal bits and pieces"

"Well, somebody needs to keep this tribe in order and I'm not about to let it go even further into ruin"

"The tribe is fine"

"Really?" he asked turning back to her and giving her a wry smile, "I bet that barely anything has happened out there since the Pollicles came because everything's still in disarray. Am I right?"

Demeter just sat there sheepishly and after a few moments of contemplation simply huffed and crossed her arms.

"I thought so," said Munk before turning back and heading towards to doorway with a reserved expression of victory on his face. A few moments later he stepped outside and squinted as he adjusted to the daylight. When his vision became clearer he started to see the mess he had expected strewn across the junkyard floor and frowned slightly when he began to wonder why no one had taken an initiative to at least make a start on clearing up.

'_For crying out loud, next thing you know I'll have to remind them to keep breathing' _he thought as he started to step down from the junk. As soon as he was on the ground he pulled a few pieces of junk to the side of the clearing and placed them down to be dealt with later on. First of all he needed a plan and more importantly a crew to get the show on the road.

As he continued to walk around and look at everything he felt his wounds and bruises protest against his movements and grimaced quietly as he felt aches and pains emanate from different parts of his anatomy as he moved them individually. Taking a quick look down to his bandages he gave a thin smile when he realised that those he had been dressed in weren't becoming soaked in blood anymore and took solace in the assumption that he must have been healing. It took a few moments more but then the thought hit him that made him wonder why there was no blood splattered around the junkyard. His claws had seen a lot of action that night and as such he certainly expected more blood to have been shed. In fact he knew a lot of blood had been shed because he distinctly remembered being covered in it while knowing that most of it wasn't his. Why then was none of it left on the floor? Surely it couldn't have worn away already.

He then brushed that thought aside since there weren't enough hours in the day to be distracted with fruitless musings. He'd get to the bottom of it somehow but right now there were other things that needed attending to and at that moment there was a specific cat he needed to check upon. He'd heard about how Bomba had been keeping from Demeter but it had only served to make him feel he really ought to see her for himself. After all, he was her protector and he felt he should have apologized for not being able to keep her from harm.

Looking over to Jenny's den he stared for a little while before closing his eyes and sighing quietly. He hated having to admit that he hadn't lived up to his own expectations and hoped that it wouldn't be too grinding to see her. With a great deal of courage he forced himself to move forward towards the Gumbie cat's home and in no time at all he was standing right outside. With a deep breath he cleared his mind and then went to go in.

He was stopped when something caught his eye and looked down to the side of the doorway to notice a piece of garbage that didn't quite seem to fit the medley of discarded items that could be found in the piles of junk. As he looked he bent down to see that the clean, white scrap he was looking at was a delicately folded piece of paper with a single word written on the outside and upon closer inspection he could see that it clearly said 'Bomba'. The silver tabby puzzled for a moment or two as he wondered how it had gotten there but then realized that someone must of course have placed it there. He picked it up and unfolded it to see that on the inside was a message written in a very elegant style and as he flicked his eyes to the bottom he saw exactly whom this letter was from. In hindsight he probably didn't even need to see the name as there were only a few cats around that were capable of writing and even fewer in such a delicate, meticulous manner.

Keeping true to the proper, upstanding cat that he was Munk didn't read the letter he saw Misto had written and folded it back in half before stepping into Jenny's den. He coughed quietly to announce himself and in the few moments before Jenny appeared he looked over to the slumped form of Bomba who was lightly draped in a blanket where she was either sleeping or lying very still.

"Good morning, Munkustrap" he heard a shrill but cheery voice say, "How are you today?"

"Fine, thank you, Jenny. How about you?" he replied making sure to be discreet in smoothing down the fur that stood on end at the sudden surprise over the tabby queen's voice.

"Carrying on as usual, dear. What can I do for you?"

"Well, I was hoping to see Bomba if it's alright with you. I haven't managed to get out of the den for the past few days but I've been meaning to find out how she is"

Jenny looked over to the still form of the red queen,

"I'm afraid I don't know if she's awake yet, dear, I haven't actually checked"

As if on cue Bomba moved her head slightly and straight away they could see she was awake. She didn't say anything though, nor did she look in their direction and the moment was suddenly made a little uneasy for everyone. Not too discouraged, Jenny carried on,

"Well, she's just taking each day as it comes at the moment, dear, I haven't really spoken to her about…what happened"

Munk nodded, "I see. Thank you anyway for being so caring. I'm sure she's much better for it than we realise"

"It's what I do, dear, no need to fuss too much. Shall I leave you two alone for a while?"

"Don't let me stop you doing anything"

"No, no, it's no bother. Let me grab a few things and I'll busy myself with the kittens for a little while"

"Are you sure you don't mind?"

"Of course"

Munk watched as Jenny pottered about and fumbled around with a few bits and bobs before giving him a kind smile and leaving the den. Both he and Bomba were left alone and he turned to look down at her without really knowing what to say. Cautiously he stepped towards her and tried to form any words at all,

"Hi" he eventually managed and instantly felt like a moron for saying it. "I just thought I'd come and see you"

His words garnered no response from the red queen and he was left only feeling more awkward. Still, he carried on,

"I would have come sooner but Demeter has kept the most incredible tabs on me and we all know she's the one cat that can force me to do anything she wants"

Still nothing. He sat down slowly next to the bed and from that angle he could see her face fairly clearly as she lay there. He didn't know what it was but Bomba looked so incredibly sad. Maybe it was the matted fur in places or the dark circles around her eyes or the deep, woeful look of those eyes themselves but simply to look at her was to feel her pain or at least see that it was destroying her. Munk didn't know where to go from there and as such he was lost for words for a few long moments which only increased the tension. Eventually he managed to get to what he wanted to say,

"I wanted to apologize to you, Bomba. I wanted to let you know that I'm so sorry I wasn't able to keep you from harm. I can't imagine what you're going through but what I do know is that it was my fault that you are. I'm sorry…I really am"

For a few moments he looked at her expectantly hoping she might respond even if it was just to tell him he was right. When nothing came he felt at a loss as to what to feel and he didn't know whether she blamed him or not for what had happened. In a way that was worse and he wished that he could get through to her somehow. He had always considered himself far better with words than his brother was but there he sat at a total loss and wondered if there was something he had forgotten to do to be able to speak to her properly.

In the end he simply looked down and quietly accepted the fact that he was probably right. It didn't need to be said, he should have been able to save her and her kittens but he hadn't. He had failed and that was all there was to say.

Feeling utterly terrible he slowly glanced from side to side and it wasn't until a few minutes of silence had gone by that he realised that in his paw he still held the letter he had discovered outside. He had no idea what it said but he knew that Bomba certainly wasn't up to reading it to herself and he could think of nothing else to break the silence that he desperately wished wasn't there.

"Bomba?" he asked gently, "I found this letter outside the den. It's written to you"

She still didn't move an inch. She was utterly unreadable and it made Munk wonder whether she could really hear him. He could see she was feeling awful but her complete lack of reaction to anything was so incredibly confusing and disconcerting.

"It's quite long, I think it's a condolence letter"

Still nothing.

"It looks like a lot of effort was put into it"

Nothing.

"It's from Misto"

That was when the tiniest flicker of movement by her caught Munk's eye. Straight away he looked up properly and waited intently for anything more. A few moments later he saw her head begin to turn and it wasn't long before her fixed, desolate expression was replaced by a more curious, worried one that was directed straight at him. She seemed to convey the single message 'What?' with her strange stare and Munk wondered if he ought to simply stop speaking right there and then. He couldn't stop himself though,

"Would you like me to read it to you?"

Bomba simply cracked her mouth open as if she were about to say something but then slowly closed it and gave a single, slow nod in agreement.

Munk gritted his teeth momentarily before looking away and unfolding the letter and examining the writing upon it. With a deep breath he cleared his throat and began to read out the delicately scrawled words on the paper,

"Dear Bomba" he began,

"I've heard that sometimes in life it's impossible to know where to begin to tell someone how you feel. I've heard it in the past but I didn't understand how a cat could be so stuck for words until something as terrible as what's happened actually occurs. I think I understand now since I don't know how to talk to you but I do know that there is so much that needs to be said and I feel that the only way in which I can do that is to try and write it all down and hope that it is clear enough for both me and you to understand. This I will try to do and I hope that once I'm finished you'll know what it is that I want to say.

First off, I am sorry. I am so incredibly sorry for you to have gone through losing your kittens in such a horrible way. I can't begin to appreciate or say that I understand exactly how you feel but I can only imagine that losing a part of you as big as this must be beyond anything normal cats feel. I'm sure you cannot begin to describe exactly how horrible and empty you feel right now and I'm afraid that all I can tell you is that I feel so sorry for you. I know how hard that must be to believe considering everything that's happened in that last few months or so but I do honestly wish it hadn't happened. No one should ever have to go through this and it's most definitely not fair that you have to now. I know that you never knew them as the independent, breathing beings they should have been but I know that you still knew them in a huge way. They had spent so long inside you and while I don't mean to assume anything I'm sure that in your heart you knew them so well. After all, you felt them moving and you could sense them growing. They were real and they were alive and the feeling of them being both a part of you as well as being made by you must have left you feeling truly happy and part of something so much bigger than yourself. I will never know that feeling but I do see how amazing it must be. In a way I feel cheated that I will never know it but it was never meant for me anyway. Maybe I'm privileged because I can experience a feeling through my magic that is truly indescribable as well and perhaps that is the same kind of feeling even if they are not the same things. I'm fortunate because I know two feelings that are more wonderful than anything else in life and the other one aside from my magic is love. True love. If this counts then maybe it's okay that I won't know the feeling of nurturing a kitten. I've been lucky to know feelings which don't even have words to describe how amazing they are so it's alright that I won't know the exact same feeling that a mother has for her kittens. Then again, maybe that feeling wasn't meant for you any more than it was for me; not in this way. Please don't get me wrong, I don't deny that you had the right to kittens but I do not think you should have come to have them in the way that you did."

Munk paused for a moment and wondered if he ought to continue reading. In those few words alone he felt the letter turning down a different path that Bomba may not have been in a state to handle at that point. In the silence he looked over at her and was surprised to see the red queen hanging on his every word. He couldn't stop now, not even if he wanted to.

"I suppose now is the time to move onto how I feel about that.

"I was angry, Bomba, I'm still angry. I am sad, I feel hurt, I feel rejected, I feel used and I feel like I am second best. Or at least I did. I'm not sure how I feel anymore. I know that I used to feel those things when Tugger told me that he had slept with you but now I'm not sure. Those words still echo in my mind from time to time and with them they bring back the ghosts of that awful period. I thought I'd found love in its most pure and beautiful of forms but then it seemed as though it had all been a lie. I felt I had been deceived and that I had been pushed aside for the more desirable option: you. I had thought that maybe I had shown Tugger something that had made him change but to know that he'd gone behind my back to have sex with you made me feel worse than I ever have in my life. I felt like a failure as a mate and that despite my best efforts I would never be good enough. Then I found out that you were pregnant and from rock bottom I sunk even lower. I didn't understand why it was happening to me and I didn't know whom to blame. I was scared, Bomba, and I didn't know where to turn to. I had only ever had Tugger for the kind of comfort I needed at times like those but it was he that had rejected me for you and I didn't know what I was meant to do. That is why I ran away. I had to get away from the awful feeling that had gripped me but it still followed me out there on the street. It quite honestly nearly killed me (I'm sure you saw how awful I looked when I came back) but above it all I was still left with one unanswered question: why? Why me? Throughout it all I still couldn't understand my feelings and for a short time you were spared my hatred while I tried to figure out why Tugger had done such a horrible thing and why it was all happening to me. It was Tugger who I was upset with and no one else even crossed my mind until I got back, at least not in any real way. It's only when I came back that I started to really loathe you for sleeping with my mate and I couldn't believe that you'd nearly managed to break us apart once more. I mean, sure, you said it was an accident but I didn't know what to believe. In the simplest of terms you were the reason Tugger and I were apart and for that I hated you. I really, really hated you."

Those few words confirmed the fears Bomba had had the day before. It was clear now that Misto hated her and that she'd done something so bad that she was being punished in kind. In her mind everything was now in perspective and she felt so incredibly guilty. Still she listened,

"Since then Tugger has done his best to show me he regretted what he'd done but it wasn't until I was forced to listen to him that I really realised that he was being honest. He proved to me that he still loved me and I realised that the love I thought had been snatched from me was still there. That let me believe that maybe things could be alright again although I knew things would never be exactly the same. It was okay though and I found that all I cared about was still being in love with him. Now all this has happened and we're being forced to try and work through even more pain although this time none of it seems to be specifically mine. I'm lucky to have escaped the brunt of this ordeal and now it seems to be your turn to go through hell. For me it's better; I have to look after Tugger which is pretty surreal for me but I like it. I really do. To be the one that's needed for a change is nice and somehow it shows me that even through all of this anguish we can still get through. I don't mean that I'm happy he's so upset but I am happy that I can take care of him for once. I think I now believe that's what love is. He told me something only a few days ago which has shown me that love isn't easy and I think I realise that now more than ever. Through it all I know that we will be okay despite anything that tries to break us apart and that even includes what you did.

"So, where does that leave us? You've seen that I still can't talk to you and I still don't know why that is. Maybe it's because I'm scared of you. You've managed to be so effective at splitting us apart in the past and maybe I'm worried that if I come near you again you'll do something to try and take him away from me and I can't risk that happening. I don't know if in your heart you still wished Tugger was yours but I have to believe that when you said he was mine you were telling the truth. I need him, Bomba, and he needs me. With us, the bottom line is that we will always get through because we love each other and I hope that you can accept that. I think in my heart I know that you do accept that despite what any other part of you might say. Through everything I still respect you for being strong because you've always been strong. Maybe it doesn't seem like it now because of what's happened but I know that you are one of the strongest cats around and given time I hope you'll get through.

"That sounds condescending, doesn't it? I'm sorry if it does. I'm finding it difficult to try and tell you how I really feel and it seems that I've come off too abrasive. I really am sorry if it seems like I'm attacking you. Please understand that it wasn't my intention but even now I feel angry over what's happened. Well, more hurt than angry. I've wanted to tell you these things for so long but I'm just not able to do it vocally. Hopefully now I can move on and so can you – at least on the matter of you, Tugger and I.

"What I really want to tell you is that I am so sorry for your loss. I'm sorry that I couldn't save you any sooner than I did in that clearing and I still wonder if I am to blame for your kittens' death. If that is how you feel then I am so sorry but I really hope it isn't. I realised as soon as that Pollicle pulled you away from me that I needed to save you despite what you'd done yet I'm still sorry that I didn't act any more quickly.

"I don't know that if what I've written comes off in a certain way. I don't know if what's here tells you that I'm angry with you or if I sympathize with you or whether I'm happy or sad. There is one thing that seems to put it all in perspective though and that was seeing you yesterday in your bed. You looked so vulnerable and so grief-stricken that for one moment I felt we were on the same level. It felt as if you knew the pain I had been through from what Tugger had done and somehow it seemed we were equal. Maybe you think I'm being smug or as if I couldn't possibly have felt the pain you do but I swear I do, Bomba. What I felt made me wonder if life was worth living anymore and I'm sure that's what's going through your mind at the moment too. In the end I simply feel that we've both gone through so much and that it no longer matters who did what to whom. If you feel that what you did was wrong then I forgive you because I think you now understand my pain. I hope that in time I will be able to talk to you again and that we can happily co-exist in some capacity. Neither the pain that I feel nor the pain that you feel I expect will ever go away but if we both understand it then maybe we don't have to feel alone. I know that I don't feel alone because I have Tugger again and that for the rest of our lives we'll always be there for each other. I hope that you too can find comfort either in us or in someone else but also be safe in the knowledge that someone else out there has known your heartbreak – at least in some form.

"I hope you can accept this, even if it isn't now. I feel I've finally been able to say what I've been desperate to say even when I didn't have the words. I respect you again, Bomba, and I wish you, if you'll allow me to, only the best. I realise that a simple phrase like that can't convey any real feeling but I swear that I do wish you everything that a good cat deserves. I hope that you can once again be happy and healthy even though that might take a long time. I don't want you to suffer Bomba because I know how bad suffering from heartbreak is. I know the crushing, unfathomable pain that comes with having it ripped into tiny pieces and I know that it seems like your world is collapsing. The worst thing is I know that I can't prevent or tell you how to avoid it but I still send you my love. Please know that I mean this from the bottom of my heart.

"Sincerely,

"Mistoffelees."

Munk looked up from the letter and stared across the den while taking a few moments to come to terms with the information he'd just been privy to. It was staggering and he had rarely known such a heart-felt confession of pure, unhindered emotion.

A few moments later he looked over at Bomba and was shocked to see her sitting up and looking dead ahead in some kind of deep yet stark contemplation. He couldn't read her clearly but it seemed that the letter from Misto had done something to her that was making something brew inside her.

Very gently he spoke to her,

"Bomba?"

He waited a moment for her to react at all but she didn't.

"Bomba? Are you okay?"

It seemed as if an eternity went by before she took a slow, deep breath and timidly looked up at him. Intently he waited for her to say something and soon she did so in a croaky, breathless voice,

"Thank you for reading that to me"

Munk simply nodded gently.

"Do you want me to leave you alone for a while?"

Bomba opened her mouth to say something but soon closed it and looked slightly blank. Munk took it as a signal that she needed time alone and quietly excused himself.

Bomba was left alone in the stillness of the den and after a few minutes she looked down at the letter written to her which Munk had placed on her bed before leaving. She simply stared at it for a long time and let the words Munk had said echo through her mind and sink into her soul.

How could it possibly be that Misto meant those things? Did he really know how she felt? Had she made him feel as she felt right at that moment? Was it really true that he meant he was sorry?

Maybe.

She just did not know how to feel and as soon as she realised that she must have felt just like Misto before having written the letter she wondered what it all meant. Somewhere deep inside of herself she started to feel as if maybe he did know such terrible pain but her reaction wasn't what she expected of herself. Deep in her heart she felt the tiniest glimmer of warmth and suddenly didn't feel so alone anymore. She still felt terrible but not alone. Someone else knew her strife and it no longer seemed like such a huge weight to bear. Someone else had felt this and she could see that they had gotten through. Did this mean that she could as well?

Perhaps.

She was sure Misto hated her though but now he was saying that he sent her his love? A few minutes later she felt herself begin to tear up again and cried quietly to herself as the emotion became too much to bear. She realised now just how badly she had hurt that poor little tuxedo tom and couldn't believe that even now he was trying to be kind. She had never known someone to be so loving and so selfless and truly she had never felt more grateful to anyone or guilty for hurting him.

**And another chapter comes to a close. Thanks for reading such a long one. It took for bloody ever to write but I hope it was worth it.**

**Next chapter will be up hopefully sooner than the last. Thanks for reading and please review if you've got a moment. Tell me if you thought it was a bit lukewarm in its impact. I've been wondering so if you think it was then if I may quote my old saying 'If it sucks then tell me and I'll try and make it better'. x **


	19. One Day At A Time

**Hey, Guys. It's me again for the last time. Not forever, just for this story because yes, this is the final chapter. Thanks so much for reading you guys but all of the big thank you's are at the end so I won't delay you here.**

**So I know my profile says that I'm in Germany now and not the UK and the short answer is that I am. I am spending the summer in Germany on an exchange program and will be here until September. I have to say I'm a little freaked out by it all but hopefully I will get through. Even if I don't I'll still have my writing to keep me occupied and provide me with a little bit of familiarity. In fact it will be nice to splurge out a whole load of English on fanfiction because I don't get to speak it properly to anyone here without it feeling a little out of place. My German is horrible at best so it'll be nice to play around with some speakers of English in the stories even if they are fictional. I knew this fanfiction lark would come in handy someday! Lol. Also, Cats is actually touring in Germany at the moment so maybe I might get a chance to see it again.**

**Another thing, sorry about the paragraphs. I don't think about it when I'm writing but I know how horrible it can be to try and read big thick chunks of text off of a computer screen. Totally fine in a book but not when you're sitting in poor light trying to focus on tiny little letters amongst a million others off of a backlit display. I've received a couple of wishes now that I make them smaller so I will endeavour to do my best.**

**What's more, you have all begged for one particular thing and it is my pleasure to deliver it to you! Know what I mean? If not, you'll see soon enough although the warnings might give it away.**

**WARNING: A nice big dollop of slash! And by the way, it's quite detailed so if this sort of thing offends you then you probably shouldn't read. Don't say I didn't warn you…**

**Love Is No Fairytale**

**Chapter 19**

**One Day At A Time**

Many days passed and things began to start turning back to normal. Munk finally managed to get the junkyard back in order with the help of a few of the other Jellicles and little by little they all started to feel safe again. Both Munk and Alonzo managed to reinstate their watch duties and as the days went by they both found themselves feeling better. The bruises slowly started to go away and the cuts also began to fade while everyone else - bar a few obvious members of the tribe - managed to come out from hiding and start behaving like they usually did.

When the nights came the delightful sound of kittens playing together was once again seen although not without the extra vigilance of the cats who watched them from the side of the clearing. There was still a little tension here and there as a result of the memory of the Pollicles but that too was starting to subside. Munk was glad to see these things in the tribe and it made it somewhat easier for him to tell Old Deuteronomy exactly what had happened.

The day he'd gone to do that he'd actually wished Demeter might have forced him to stay in the den again and prevent him from having to face the music. In the end though he simply adopted his usual manner of swallowing any worry or timidity he had and simply went to do it. That was his way; always had been and always would be.

Old Deuteronomy had been shocked to say the least to hear that Bomba had gone through such a horrible ordeal and above everything else - including the state of the junkyard - he was worried for her welfare. Munk had assured him that she was being well cared for but that still didn't stop his father from feeling worried.

It was hard to hear that any queen would loose her kitten but two in Bomba's case and in such a manner was simply terrible. He had promised to come to the tribe soon and do all he could and that was where Munk had left him. He had worked himself into such a state of mind that he didn't even realise what he was doing half the time since he was just going through the motions like a protector should. It wasn't until he'd actually gotten back to the junkyard that he realised he had managed to pull it off and had breathed a sigh of relief to know that his father hadn't been disappointed in him. In all honestly that had been his one of his larger worries; he couldn't bear to let his father down in such a way.

He had the wind taken out of his sails a little when he realised he'd forgotten to tell Old Deuteronomy about Tugger's state and kicked himself for not making such an important admission. He then wondered if maybe it was a good thing that he'd forgotten since his father really didn't need to be worrying about too many things. Besides, in his mind Tugger was his idiot little brother and although he was exactly that: his brother, he decided it was better for their father to worry about Bomba in this case. He hoped Tugger would pull through. In fact, he was sure he would since he had Misto around.

More days passed until a week had gone by and things more or less settled back into a routine. Not all things though, there were still some very worrisome problems that were unsettling a few of the Jellicles and none of those problems were greater than the state Bomba was still in. The worry had mostly been Jenny's as she'd been the one to witness the progression of Bomba's moods as the days passed and they had ranged from hysterical crying in the beginning to now where she constantly went between quiet sobbing, blank and thoughtful silence and even so far as smiling. Jenny had commented on Bomba's smiling when she'd seen it saying it was pleasing to see her looking that much brighter despite wondering whether or not the red queen was simply losing her mind. When she'd asked Bomba what she was happy about she hadn't said anything of any major clarity and only left Jenny with unanswered questions.

Now that she was appearing to be a little better Jenny had started to talk to Bomba about what had happened but she often became very confused as she seemed to get different answers based on what mood her patient was in. Responses could be lukewarmly positive or horribly desolate and none of them really gave the tabby queen any kind of clear idea what to conclude from them. She simply put it down to Bomba still being in a fragile state and hoped that soon she'd come out of it.

That was not exactly what was going on in Bomba's mind though. The fact that she was still so vague and unusually quiet was because she was often locked deep in thought over what she ought to feel. She didn't know exactly what she was feeling but it didn't really upset her. At the times when she thought about her kittens she became very sad and often cried but that was usually followed by one of her longer periods of thinking silently. Since she didn't really know what she ought to have been thinking about largely due to her mixed up feelings meant she was sometimes locked in a loop of emotion going around and around in circles without it really making any progress on getting through the grief.

There was one thing she did think about clearly though: Misto's letter. She kept it near to her bed and often read it over and over and each time went through a different cycle of emotions. To hear how Misto used to hate her always upset her a little bit but that part at the end when he said that he didn't hate her anymore and even went as far as wishing her love always touched her in a way that she didn't understand. It was the same feeling as looking up at the sky and seeing the sun break through the mottled grey clouds after rain and as she read she always finished the letter feeling as if there was hope. To know that even Misto could get over what happened to him seemed to suggest that maybe she could get over this. She understood his feelings now and could see they were similar to her own and she wondered if maybe, in time, she would come to some kind of resolution like he did. What's more, she saw that things could never really be like they were before but to know that it was okay to feel like that was so incredibly comforting. Misto – through the admission of his innermost feelings to her – had given her the gift of hope and in such a dreadful time there was truly no greater gift.

This only served to humble her even more and she felt so indebted to him for being so kind despite all of the horrible things she'd done. She and all of the Jellicles were truly blessed to have such a wonderfully kind cat amongst them and she wished so hard that she knew of some way to repay him. She wondered if maybe a gesture as big as that couldn't be repaid; even so, she would try. Misto needed to know she was grateful because she quite clearly owed him her life.

* * *

Tugger creakily pushed himself up from the bed and winced slightly from the discomfort of his aching muscles. It'd been a long time since he'd done anything of any major physical activity and his body was getting used to him being lazy. As he looked up and across the den he caught sight of himself in the mirror and was a little taken aback to see exactly what he looked like.

As he stared he wondered for a moment who it was that was looking back at him but a few seconds later when he remembered it was him he sighed and felt really quite unattractive – a previously alien feeling to him. He wondered how he could have let himself fall into such a poor state of prettiness and he wondered even more why he didn't really care. It didn't seem right that he was feeling like this and it made him feel really low.

All in all, he knew he'd just have to go with it. Things couldn't be changed with a simple sprucing up, there was a lot of work involved including some thorough soul searching and he knew there was no point in putting it off. In the past days he'd thought for hours on end about how he felt about losing kittens that were either truly his or illegitimately his but he hadn't come to any kind of conclusion as to which one they had been. He really didn't know how he felt and on this day he decided that he'd had enough of being stuck. He knew he just had to move on and try to live with feeling so confused and the longer he put it off the longer he'd feel miserable.

There was one thing that was clear though: his shining star through all of this was Misto. That beautiful little tux had been there for him ever since that fateful night when the Pollicles came and he'd been there to wait on Tugger's every whim. Tugger hadn't even asked for him to do it either, he'd simply done it as if it were natural and through all of the confusion Tugger knew Misto was there for him. He was a wonderful tom and every day Tugger counted his blessings that he had his Misto.

Feeling a little better as he thought of his mate he smiled slightly and looked to the doorway where he heard some gentle rustling. A second later that very tux jumped through and beamed back at his mate.

"Hey, Tug!" he said brightly as he walked towards him

"Hey, babe" he replied as he welcomed the tux into his arms

"How you doing?"

"Okay"

"You're up a little earlier today"

"Yep. Didn't feel like being in bed anymore"

"That's kinda strange for you. You love being in bed, especially not for sleeping"

Tugger gave him a gentle smile at the joke and felt annoyed with himself that his whole heart wasn't in it.

"Well, you know, I kinda thought there was no use in just lying around anymore"

"Does that mean you're feeling better about…everything?" asked Misto as he leaned back a little and looked Tugger straight in the eyes. Tugger just shrugged,

"I hope so. Even if I'm not I'm just bored of feeling blue"

Misto smirked, "Blue? When have you ever used that word to describe how you feel?"

"Shut up" said Tugger as he smiled a little more warmly and poked Misto playfully.

"Hey, no need to tell me to shut up but I understand if you're feeling blue. It's okay to feel blue, you know? Lots of pussycats feel blue sometimes. You can be the big blue pussycat if you want"

"Oh, piss off!"

The tux simply scampered away and continued to tease Tugger for a while who eventually began to chase him around the den as he forgot about his wavering sorrows. Pretty soon he caught him and they both fell down onto the bed again laughing together and feeling mutually happy for the first time in quite a while.

"Still feeling blue?" asked Misto cheekily

"Less so now, Misty" replied Tugger smiling back at him and looking him in the eye

"Don't call me that, and you feel like coming outside today?"

"I dunno…maybe…"

"Well, everyone will be happy to see you. They're all wondering how you're doing since they haven't seen you in a while"

Tugger rolled his eyes, "Oh Everlasting, now I have everyone feeling sorry for me?"

"Well, in a way. They all saw how unhappy you were after…you know"

"Yeah but it's my business so why should they all be worrying?"

"Because they're your friends, Tug, and they love you"

Tugger huffed, "I don't care"

"Sure you do," said Misto as he squeezed him gently. Tugger just huffed,

"So what did you tell them then?"

"Just that you're working through and that you're taking your time to do it"

"Did you have to make me sound so soft?"

"I think it'll do you good to sound a little sensitive for once"

"Pshh…" said Tugger as he rolled away to get up. Before he managed to swing his legs over the edge Misto caught him and pulled him back. Tugger looked at him and saw he had his 'understanding' face on and waited for the probing to begin. He didn't really mind since he always felt better after having been talked to by his mate but he still felt a little put out since he had no idea how the tux used his words so effectively to get him to open up. Perhaps he was magic in more ways than he knew.

"Come on, Tug, you know you do care about everyone wondering about you"

"Not really. I don't need them making a fuss"

"You secretly love it though, don't you? You love having cats fight for your attention and affection"

"This isn't that though, is it?"

"I suppose not. Still, it's nice to have cats care about you"

"But why do they have to care about this? It's hard enough to try and work out some of the confusion without everyone getting involved"

"I know, but you understand that everyone only wants the best for you, right?"

Tugger just looked down and pouted like the spoiled brat he was and looked up a moment later to see Misto smiling wryly and knowing that he'd caught him out.

"I don't like it when you do that" Tugger whined

"Yes, you do" said Misto and kissed Tugger gently on the lips. The bigger tom simply lay there without kissing back and kept his eyes open as it happened and remained silent after it had finished whilst he felt the tingle subside. A few moments later he rubbed his lips together and revelled in the memory of it whilst flicking his eyes down in thought. Misto noticed this and decided to quiz him on it,

"What's on your mind?"

The bigger tom looked back up and took a moment to respond,

"I miss kissing you"

Misto smiled warmly, "So did I"

"No, I mean I still miss kissing you. We haven't properly kissed for ages and I really miss it. It's always so good and it makes me feel great"

Misto paused for a moment and felt his heart flutter a little. He loved hearing that Tugger enjoyed kissing him and felt he must be doing it right. Kissing was always Tugger's forte and from time to time Misto wondered if he was really good enough at it for him.

"Well, why don't we kiss right now and make sure it's really special?"

"I'd like that," said Tugger quietly.

Misto smiled back and sat up before pulling Tugger up to sit too. They gazed at each other for a moment before Misto put his paws on Tugger's shoulders and leant in slowly. Tugger felt his heart start to race as he drew near and felt a little strange as if it were his first kiss all over again only better. A split second later he snapped himself out of it and knew that this was something he had to do right. Right there and then he took control and snaked his paws around Misto's waist. He pulled the smaller tom close so they were rubbing up against each other and moved his face very close to his lover's. He stopped just an inch or two from the tux's lips before whispering, "I love you" and then closed the gap between them. He kissed Misto softly at first but quickly strengthened it before running his paws up the tux's back and gently pressing his head against his. His other paw softly caressed Misto's lower back and as he worked his own brand of magic through the kiss he felt the smaller tom shudder in his grasp. He knew Misto well enough to know that meant he was completely lost in it and smiled as he continued to massage his lips with his own.

A few moments later he pulled away from Misto just at the point before the kiss was sufficiently long enough and he was such a master at the art that he knew Misto would be instantly craving more because of it. He opened his eyes to see the tux open his with his lips still in the shape they had been in during the kiss and a second later retracted them before forming a smile.

"It's not fair that you do that," Misto said quietly

"Do what?" asked Tugger slyly

"Leave me wanting more"

"How did you know?" asked Tugger knowingly

"I've been kissing you long enough to figure it out"

"Then maybe I need to kiss you even better"

"I'd like to see you try"

Tugger chuckled and kissed him again. He loved that Misto had come such a long way in his ability to flirt since the start of their relationship and it really made him feel so good to know that the tux was really into him. Tugger continued to kiss Misto and even went so far as putting a few of his moves on him that he rarely used so as to keep things fresh. They only served to make Misto become even more lost in the moment and this time Tugger didn't pull away at the key points he knew of. He couldn't bear to anymore since kissing Misto felt so wonderful. He had missed it so badly and now that he was doing it again he felt – despite all of his confusion and heartache – whole again. He loved the way Misto moved and was so in tune with him. He loved that his tux liked kissing him as much as he did and he loved that he held on so tightly as he did so. It felt so incredible that he never wanted it to stop and would gladly have gone on kissing for hours had it not been for something that caught his attention.

As Misto pressed up against him and rubbed back and forth a distinctive firmness pressed into his stomach and made Tugger pause for a moment. Breaking the kiss and leaning back he looked down and saw that in the heat of the moment Misto was becoming rather excited and he looked up to see him blushing slightly. It was both incredibly cute and incredibly hot at the same time and as such Tugger felt a stirring in his own loins as they remained gazing at each other in silence with the passion in the air around them building steadily.

As they stared at each other Tugger smirked and simply asked,

"You wanna?"

Misto blushed even more and bit his lip through a grin before replying with,

"Do you?"

Tugger grinned evilly before grabbing Misto's hips and kissing him again only this time with much more firmness and with a mountain of passion that only he was capable of conveying through a kiss.

At first contact Misto felt a surge of excitement rush through him and had to stifle the excited giggle that wanted to be released from inside. He then allowed all of his inhibitions to be defeated and melted into the amazing kiss Tugger was treating him to and shivered under his touch as his paws roamed his body. He kissed back with the same fiery intensity as Tugger and it wasn't long before they were so lost in each other that time seemed to fade away and they were left in a world were there was only each other.

At the crucial moments Tugger had discovered over the years he expertly caressed and rubbed Misto in such a way to make him moan softly into his lips and smiled internally when he felt the smaller tom subconsciously signal that he needed more. In response he simply ran his paw up Misto's back and pressed against the back of his neck to draw him even closer while gently using his claws to tickle his skin under his fur.

As they continued in their mind-blowing lip-locking Tugger felt himself become just as excited as Misto and sensed his own arousal pressing into the smaller tom's body just as he felt in return. Misto had nearly forgotten how good it felt to feel Tugger pressing against him and was a little surprised to be reminded of his size. Tugger was certainly big and for a brief moment Misto felt slightly nervous over the idea of being made love to with such an instrument. It only took another moment more for him to remember how good it felt to be connected with Tugger in such a way and pushed any apprehension he had aside. He had done this many times and he knew he loved it, craved it even. He was so lost in the fire of the moment that even if he could think of another reason to be nervous then he couldn't care about it. He wanted Tugger and he knew Tugger wanted him.

In a strong, powerful motion Tugger pushed himself against Misto and forced him down onto the bed as he rested his body over him. As they still kissed they breathed hard through their noses against each other's faces and to feel both that and Tugger's weight on him made Misto feel slightly giddy. This tom was the sexiest cat alive and he needed him now.

A few seconds later Tugger broke the kiss and proceeded to move down to Misto's neck and shoulders where he nipped teasingly at the smaller cat's skin through his fur and made him let out quick little moans of inexplicable pleasure. Misto simply pulled Tugger hard against him and relished in the feeling of their bodies rubbing together as the bigger tom moved against him. He gripped Tugger's fur in his paws as his movements made him tense up in amazing pleasure and the sounds he made were music to Tugger's ears.

"Tugger…" whispered Misto fervently as he grabbed his mate and pulled him back up to eye level. The bigger tom just looked at him lovingly and caressed his beautiful face before kissing him again and reaching his paws around Misto's back. He then leant back and pulled Misto with him without breaking the kiss so the smaller tom was straddling his hips as he knelt. With a voice that was dripping with seduction he moved his mouth up towards Misto's ear and in a deep voice quietly said,

"Turn around"

Straight away Misto flexed his legs to move them around Tugger and slowly turned himself around and repositioned himself against Tugger's hips. The bigger tom pulled him close again and began to kiss the back of his neck making Misto pant slowly and heavily while letting out little moans of ecstasy. He was so ready for this and he desperately wanted Tugger inside of him now. As a signal he reared up slightly against Tugger and the bigger tom happily complied by grabbing his own erection and moving into position. Very slowly he began to pull Misto down onto himself and revelled at the resistance he felt against his arousal. As he pressed he felt Misto gasp and whimper quietly as he was penetrated and in one quick but gentle movement he thrust forward slightly and felt himself slip in.

At that exact moment they both let out short but loud moans and both felt dizzy at the intense pleasure they both were feeling. Misto continued to shudder every few seconds and Tugger simply knelt and panted in stillness as he tried to get his head around the amazing feeling he felt throughout his entire body. When they both managed to regain some clearer thought they continued to get closer and in a few short moments Misto's back was once again resting against Tugger's chest and as they made contact the bigger tom snaked his arms around his lover and held him very tightly.

"Everlasting Cat, Misto…" he breathed as he panted into the smaller tom's neck and then began to gently lift and drop him against his hips. As he did so he heard the tux moan hungrily in his throat and let out little chuffs and he knew his mate well enough to know that it was because he was completely lost in the spectacular feeling of sex. He took it as a sign and began to increase his force and the fervency of his actions as well as beginning to rock his hips gently back and forth against the smaller tom he held.

Together they carried on moaning as they mated and soon Tugger pushed forward and pressed Misto down into the bed again and loomed over him as he took full control of the love making. He grabbed Misto's hips and pulled them up so he could have access to his nether regions and grasped and fondled as he thrust back and forth with his own hips. As soon as he did so he heard Misto begin to moan louder into the pillow bellow him and this made Tugger nearly lose control. Still, he kept a hold of himself and kept thinking about Misto's needs above his own. He wanted to pleasure his mate above everything else and if the sounds Misto were making were any indication then he was doing the right thing. He liked that; in fact he loved knowing he was such a master of sex that he could make Misto feel more amazing than he ever had done.

Neither one knew how long they had been going at it before they'd worked themselves into a fast, passionate rhythm since they were both so engulfed in each other. Every movement was a new world of sensual amazement and neither one of them ever wanted it to stop.

Without really thinking about it Tugger soon leant back and grabbed Misto's waist firmly. He quickly spun him around so he was lying on his back and then grabbed his legs and pulled them apart. He leant forward again and began to mash their mouths together once more before finding his position again and pushing back into the smaller tom and resuming their mating. This felt so much better and much more intimate than before and he loved being able to kiss his mate as he rutted against him. It made him feel amazing and above everything else he felt so in love. For the first time in what seemed like forever he felt as if they were one body and that their very souls were intertwined.

It wasn't long before Tugger began to find the pleasure too much to handle and he knew he was getting close to the critical point. With other cats in the past he had always been able to handle that feeling and put it off but with Misto he simply couldn't control it. Misto was too amazing and felt too good to be able to think about anything else and he knew he wouldn't last much longer because of it. Straight away he broke their kiss and began to moan and grunt loudly as he increased his pace. Misto knew what was coming and felt exactly the same. The kind of pleasure Tugger was making him feel was indescribable and he knew he wouldn't last long either. Together they breathed hard against each other's faces and moaned loudly as they did all they could to make the other feel good.

Then the moment came. At the same moment they gripped each other's bodies as tightly as they could. With one final thrust they both jumped to the highest point of pleasure imaginable and strained to push out each other's names as they reached their orgasm. They released together and Misto had to stop himself from shouting out as he felt the wave of ecstasy wash over him. Tugger just squeezed Misto as tightly as he could and moaned loudly and lowly into his neck as he felt his orgasm blow his mind. They'd both missed it so much and truly they never wanted it to stop. It was so amazing and the sheer energy that blasted through their bodies was indescribable.

When it had finished Tugger collapsed down hard onto Misto and they both lay there panting heavily. Neither one of them said anything for a long time and they both stayed together just enjoying the feeling of being connected as they felt the fantastic sensation slowly fade away.

They remained in that position for what seemed like hours but they didn't mind. They were so in love and needed each other so badly that they just couldn't bring themselves to part.

* * *

Half an hour later or maybe longer Tugger and Misto found themselves dozing next to each other on their bed simply holding one another and revelling in each other's warmth. Raising his head, Misto looked at Tugger next to him and smiled lovingly. As he watched Tugger lay there with his eyes closed and a contented smile on his face he wondered how he could have gone so long without him. As he thought back he could barely remember at that moment how bad the pain had been and wondered why it had taken him so long to return. Then again, even if it did hurt it didn't seem clear as to how he could have resisted coming back to Tugger to feel in love. He loved being in love and he knew that there was nothing in the world that could really make it go away. It could surely be masked but it could never disappear and he knew in his heart that he'd love Tugger forever.

Misto then moved closer to Tugger and put his paw on the bigger tom's chest. He played with the thickening fur there for a while and was rewarded with Tugger opening his eyes and looking up at him.

"Your mane's coming through again," said Misto quietly

"You think so?" asked Tugger as he flicked his eyes down to Misto's paw.

"Mmhmm. I'd say it won't be long before it's back to its usual glory"

"I certainly won't protest"

Misto simply smiled and pecked Tugger on the lips before leaning back,

"That was really good"

"You thought so? It was so-so for me" teased Tugger earning him a playful swat. "You're right, it was fantastic," he corrected and pecked Misto back.

"I missed it"

"So did I"

"Does this mean you're feeling better then?"

Tugger looked down briefly before making eye contact again,

"I think so. I'm not really sure but I don't really care as long as you and I are okay"

They were both silent for a moment before Tugger noticed the pause and queried his mate,

"Are we okay?"

Misto simply rubbed his cheek against Tugger's and gave him a loving look,

"Yeah. We're okay"

They shared another kiss before Misto lay back down with his head resting on Tugger's chest and closed his eyes. In the stillness of the den he spoke quietly,

"You think you'll be okay with all the other stuff?"

Tugger sighed,

"I hope so. I've decided that I don't want to feel depressed anymore because there's no use in it. I've got to move on and that's all I want to do"

"It's okay to grieve though, you know? If you're sad then you won't be able to move on until you accept it"

"Accept what though?"

"That your kittens died"

Tugger felt a small twinge inside him. Why did that always have to happen?

"Do we really have to talk about that again?"

"Well, have you decided whether or not they were your kittens or not"

The bigger tom rolled his eyes and tried to deal with the unpleasant feeling he felt inside. This whole thing made him uncomfortable and he knew he didn't feel right talking about it.

"I don't know. I don't want to know. I just want to leave it and forget about it"

Misto sighed silently to himself,

"Okay. Well if you change your mind you know I only want to help, right?"

"Sure"

"I love you"

Tugger smiled weakly,

"I love you too"

They stayed together for a little while longer before Misto yawned, pushed himself up and sat on the edge of the bed. Tugger looked up,

"Where are you off to?"

"I just fancy some air. It's a bit stuffy in here"

"Oh babe, stay," pleaded Tugger in his very unique, whiny way.

Misto just pulled on his arm as Tugger held it and smiled as he replied,

"I'll be back in a bit. You stay here"

"Stay with me"

"I won't be long"

"Please"

"Come on, let me go"

"No"

"Please"

"Nope"

Misto just switched to a more cheeky smile and raised an eyebrow,

"Have it your way"

In a flash he disappeared in a cloud of sparkles and left Tugger with his arm sticking out into the air. When he realised what had happened he just smiled, shook his head and lay back down. There really was no use in trying to hold Misto against his will.

* * *

Misto reappeared right in the centre of the junkyard. Only a few of the Jellicles were out and about but those who were nearby were very much taken by surprise. Tumblebrutus was one such kitten who happened to be standing fairly close to the spot Misto was now in and at the sudden appearance he puffed up and hissed briefly before realising who it was. Misto just chuckled and looked on as the kitten began to blush and look away in embarrassment.

"Did I scare you?" asked Misto jokily

"Shut up" he replied before running off and out of sight.

Misto simply chuckled again, closed his eyes and took in a deep breath of the cooler, fresher air. Somehow he felt more alive having made love to Tugger again and he felt he could jump for joy.

Turning around he saw his sister sitting alone across the clearing watching him and waiting for him to come over. He quickly obliged and trotted over to sit with her.

"Hey, sis" he said as he plopped down

"Hey, Misto. How's it going?"

"Really good" he replied as he stretched himself out and flexed every part of himself that he could find. This only left Victoria with a curious expression on her face before it became more knowing.

"Oh, I see…" she said wryly and with a raised eyebrow

"What?"

"I see that very recently it's been very, very good"

"What are you…" he began before cottoning on to what she meant. _'Am I that obvious?' _he thought before he replied, "…Oh, shut up"

"Hey, never mind me. I'm just glad you and Tug are feeling better and getting along well. Very well it seems"

"Stop it!" said Misto as he tried to hide his embarrassment

"I trust he's just as satisfied?"

"I am not talking about this with you"

The white queen simply gave him a look as if to say 'Don't make me ask twice' and he eventually caved in,

"Fine. Yes he is"

"Good. So anyway, you think you might get him to come out today?"

"I don't know. I don't wanna rush him"

"I see. Well it would be nice to see him. Everyone's worried about him"

"That's what I told him but he said he doesn't want everyone fussing"

"Really?"

"Well, he doesn't mean it. I think he secretly loves the attention. Then again, this might be different so I think I'm just gonna wait until he's ready"

"To do what?"

"To do anything"

"Hmm…" was all Victoria came back with and the two sat in silence as they watched Tumble tentatively make his way back into the clearing while keeping an eye on Misto.

The two continued to chat for a while and as they did they saw many other cats make their way into the clearing. The sound of several quiet conversations eventually began to echo around and it wasn't long before things appeared pretty normal. Jemima who popped out of somewhere soon joined Misto and Victoria and the three even managed to get a few laughs in here and there.

These all halted when Misto noticed a particular red queen emerge from Jenny's den and as soon as his companions noticed this they both looked to where he was looking and paused too. The three watched as Bomba slowly stepped out and noticed the three of them looking at her and as she felt their eyes upon her she didn't really know how to feel. The main feeling was nervousness and it wasn't at all settling for her. She wanted them to stop looking but she didn't see any other way of doing so without yelling and she didn't want to do that. Aside from anything else she didn't feel she had the power inside herself to even so much as raise her voice anymore and she just hoped that soon they'd stop.

Keeping her gaze away from them she delicately climbed down and began to walk in the opposite direction so she didn't have to face the stares. She intended to make her way out of the clearing and find a quiet space in the junkyard where she could be alone. She began to concentrate so hard on doing just that that she startled when she heard Misto's voice right behind her.

"Bomba?" he asked tentatively. Straight away she span round and felt her heart jump into her throat. It took her a few moments to respond,

"Misto…" was all she could say

"Are you okay?"

Again she paused but then simply said,

"You're talking to me…"

The tux smiled weakly back at her,

"I guess I am"

"Why?"

"I saw you and I thought I'd ask how you were since I haven't seen you since…all that"

"Oh…" she replied quietly

"So how are you?"

"Oh, I'm…okay I suppose"

"Are you feeling better?"

"I…don't know. I'm not bleeding anymore if that's what you mean"

"It is"

"Oh, then in that case I guess yes, I'm feeling a little better"

"That's good to hear," said Misto with a sympathetic smile

They then just looked at each other for a few moments before Bomba carried on,

"Are you okay?"

"Me? Oh, I'm fine. I didn't really get hurt"

"No, I mean, are you feeling better about…you and Tugger?"

"Ah, well, yes, I am. I think things are alright again or at least they nearly are"

Bomba just nodded and looked down before she spoke again,

"I got your letter"

Suddenly Misto felt a little colder and wasn't sure where this was about to go.

"Oh…" he said a little awkwardly and simply left it hanging there. Bomba took his silence as a reaffirmation of his disdain for her and knew straight away she had to set it right.

"I'm sorry, Misto" she said without managing to keep a hold of her emotions. Straight away she began to tear up and hated that she couldn't stop herself from crying. Was she really that pathetic?

Misto just looked up at her distraught face and suddenly felt awful about making her feel so terrible on top of everything else. He had to make this right somehow.

"Hey, no, it's me who should be sorry. Maybe I should have talked to you instead of writing it"

"You couldn't have though. You said you couldn't. I didn't know I'd hurt you as badly as I hurt right now. I never meant to do that to you"

Misto was again quiet for a moment before he managed to reply,

"It's okay. It was just how I felt at the time. I don't hate you now"

"But still, I'm so sorry for doing what I did"

"Well, it wasn't all your fault. Besides, Tugger and I are okay so there's no need to bring it all up again"

"You don't have to forgive me though. I wouldn't forgive me," she said as she still struggled to fight against her tears.

"Well, I've always figured that there's no use in holding a grudge. You got hurt as badly as I did so there's no need for me to hate you on top of you already feeling so bad"

"I just don't understand how you can forgive something as horrible as what I did to you"

Misto sighed,

"It's because I know deep down that neither of you meant to do it. I know that should be no excuse but I can't hate any cat and you've both shown that you're sorry and I guess that's good enough. Even if it's not then I accept that it's good enough so why do we need to remain hung up on it?"

Bomba sniffled and looked at him,

"How can you possibly be so kind? Even after all of what's happened"

Misto smiled,

"Because it's who I am, and because you've felt just as much pain as I have. To know that you understand I suppose is enough for me"

"I'm so sorry" she said again before looking down and covered her face with her paws. Misto just stepped forward and hugged her gently,

"It's okay. You know I've already forgiven you"

Those simple words opened the floodgates for Bomba and she proceeded to cry into the little magician's dark fur. Misto simply held her as a few of the other members of the tribe looked on and puzzled over the odd display. They didn't understand but they were at least glad not to see Misto ripping her to shreds like they expected. Then again, they knew no one really understood Misto. He would always be mysterious and there was simply no way of that changing.

A few moments later Misto stepped back and allowed Bomba to pull herself together.

"I'm sorry I'm crying. You don't need an over-emotional queen putting any more strain on you"

"It's okay. You're nowhere near as fussy as Tugger when he decides to be a complete misery-guts"

Bomba smiled and let out a little chuckle,

"I'm so happy for you two. I'm so glad you've managed to reconcile"

"So am I" said Misto happily, "I hated not being with him"

"Are you too happy that things have worked out?"

"Of course we are. I think we're most happy that we can just leave all of the past behind us and get on with our lives"

"I'm so glad you two have each other"

"Me too" said Misto before he noticed Bomba looking a little put out over the matter. He quickly added, "I hope you can be happy too someday"

She nodded as she looked down and simply replied,

"I hope so too"

"I'm sure you will"

"Well, I'll just have to wait and see" she said with a smile

"Just hold out, Bomba. Something will come along"

"Thanks, Misto"

"Well, I should be getting back to Tugger"

"Okay. I'll see you later"

"See you," said Misto as he turned and tottered back to his den. As he went Bomba watched him and still wondered how so many amazing qualities could be possessed by one sweet, little cat. She felt so incredibly indebted to him and hoped that he would always be happy. Then again, if he and Tugger were that in love then she knew they'd probably always be happy. In a way it filled her with hope that she too would eventually find the same happiness and as she turned away she felt that feeling rest within her heart.

Things would be alright again, maybe not now but soon. All she had to do was hang onto that hope and live in the light of the kindness that had been shown to her by Misto. He was a wonderful cat and she felt so blessed to know him.

* * *

Back in the den, Misto hopped through the doorway and looked over to where he expected Tugger to be. He wasn't in bed where he had left him but he took a quick glance around and saw he was standing in front of the mirror checking himself out and preening. Misto tutted internally and went over to snake his arms around his mate's chest and look into the mirror with him.

"I see your vanity's back in order" he teased

"I was just checking what you said about my mane coming back," said Tugger as he placed his paws on Misto's.

"And?"

"Sort of. It probably won't be too long before it's awesome again"

"I bet not," said Misto as he kissed Tugger on the cheek"

Tugger then turned around and drew him into his arms.

"So where have you been?"

"Just out chatting"

"Anything new?"

"I spoke to Bomba actually"

Tugger let him go.

"Oh Everlasting Cat, what's she up to now?"

Misto rolled his eyes at Tugger's quick jump to annoyance.

"It was actually a really nice talk"

"Has she said something that's got you thinking again?"

"What do you mean?"

"Is she trying to weasel her way back into your head and then get between us?"

"No, don't be so worried. I actually went to her when I saw her to see if she was okay"

"Why did you go and do a silly thing like that?"

"Because I'm nice," said Misto with an upward inflection so it sounded more like a question and as if he ought to have finished it with a 'maybe'.

"You don't owe her anything," said Tugger spitefully

"Nor does she owe me anymore. She's been through a lot and she needs to know I don't hate her"

"What do you mean?"

"What?"

"Why don't you hate her?"

"Because for one she knows just how horrible I felt and for the other I've forgiven her just like I forgave you"

"Why did you forgive her?"

"Because it's not healthy to hold grudges, even over the big things"

"You're mad"

"Am I now?" said Misto as he placed his paws on his hips, "Are you sure it's not just you feeling angry towards her and you wish I felt the same"

"No" said Tugger as if he were a spoilt kitten – despite that phrase being very appropriate to him in a manner of speaking.

"I think it is," said Misto with a raised eyebrow

"It's not"

"Then what is it?"

"She'll never stop being a conniving, meddling bitch. Why can't you see that?"

"Because it's wrong, Tug. You're just mad because you need someone to blame for everything that happened"

"I blame myself for what happened, I just don't like her because of the part she played"

"I thought you said you started to get along while I was away"

"That was right before you came back and because our fighting wasn't doing any good and because we were going to be having kittens. Now that's all over and done with I don't see why I shouldn't hate her like I ought to"

"It's because you know you don't really hate her and because you want to try and focus your frustration on something other than your own mixed up feelings" said Misto quite matter-of-factly and making Tugger pause with his mouth open. Misto had hit the nail right on the head and had literally left him speechless. How had he managed to do that yet again? Feeling stupid Tugger looked away and pouted making Misto smile.

"Tug, you don't have to hate her in order to move on. It's hating her that will hold you back. Just let it go and then maybe you might be able to get past some of this"

Tugger sighed,

"But if I can't be angry at someone for screwing up my life so much then how am I meant to let out my frustration at it?"

Misto caressed his face with one of his paws,

"Just talk, that's all we've got to do. If we talk about it then we can work through and pretty soon you'll feel so much better"

Tugger closed his eyes and leant into Misto's paw enjoying the comfort,

"I don't know how I'm meant to do this"

Misto smiled at him sympathetically,

"I'll help you. I'll be here for you because I love you and nothing's going to change that. You've got me for life darling and I don't care how long it takes, I'll help you through and we'll come out the other side feeling so much better and so much more in love"

"But it all seems to so hard and like as if there will always be something else to fill the gaps of the things I manage to work through"

"Then we'll just keep going until you do feel better. I promise I won't give up on you darling, even if you do"

"I can't ask you to do that"

"You didn't, I'll do it anyway"

Tugger paused again before he addressed the main thing that was troubling him.

"I don't know how I feel about those kittens. I don't want them to have been mine but I can't shake the feeling that they were"

Misto nodded,

"Well, biologically they were but it's up to you whether or not you want to consider them yours. You must remember that they're dead though, Tug, and that even if you do think they were yours that's not going to bring them back"

"I know," said Tugger, "but I didn't want them anyway. I'm not sure I would bring them back even if I could for that matter. I just want you and nobody else"

"Well, you've got me" said Misto with a kind smile.

Tugger smiled back at him,

"I don't think I could be more in love with you if I tried"

"Why's that?" asked Misto softly

"Because I love you so much more than anything else for everything you've done for me"

Misto leant up and kissed him softly on the lips before saying,

"You know that love will see us through, right?"

"I know it will," said Tugger with the same expression.

"So you know that even with all of the other stuff we'll still be alright?"

"I suppose you're right."

Misto smiled back even wider.

"Shall we just take it one day at a time?" the tux asked softly as he led Tugger over to the doorway. Right at the threshold Tugger stopped pulled him up again so their faces were very close,

"As long as I have you I don't think I'll have anything to worry about"

"Because in the end it's only love that matters, right?"

"Damn right"

**There it is. All done.**

**Well then, I hope you liked it. Not just this chapter but also the entire story. It's taken me many months but it's finally done and I'm glad I've managed to keep you all entertained for so long, or least I hope I have.**

**May I just say now: thank you all so much for reading my story. I've had so much fun writing it and been so touched by all of your lovely reviews. They have been like little presents every week or so and I'm so grateful to you all for saying such lovely things. You guys are amazing and I'm so thankful for having such a wonderful bunch of followers like you. Thank you all so much.**

**If you liked this final chapter then by all means leave me a review and if you didn't well that's tough because I'm done now and I shan't be changing anything. Lol. Still, as always I love to hear what you think so I'll gladly take any comments.**

**Look out for my next story which will be up as soon as I write the first chapter. I've been dying to get started on it for months since I had the idea for it back in either February or March and every now and then I've had an idea for it which really makes me want to tap away at the keyboard. As such I have a fair few ideas for it already so hopefully it will be really good. The only problem is I haven't resolved the biggest plot point in the entire thing yet but that should come nearer the end and is probably many months away from now. Just to let you know it will involve our old favourite Mistoffelees and one other cat who I've noticed he isn't so often paired with when he's not being abused by him – does that give it away? It too will be another romantic story but with some things that happen in it that you really won't see coming – or at least I hope you won't. I'm also going to try and make the characters a little truer to their personalities as they are portrayed in the musical so hopefully that will make it even better. Even so, look out for it and I hope you enjoy it.**

**Getting back to this story though, thanks again for reading it. It's been so nice to see so many thousands of hits and I'm so indebted to you all. If you want to private message me at all and talk about it or anything about Cats and fanfiction then please don't hesitate. I always reply.**

**Thanks again everyone. See you in my next story.**

**Lots of love,**

**cjfreeman**

**xxx**


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